Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach. Bleach is the creative product of Kubo Tite and is published through Weekly Shonen Jump. I am only using this as an output and claim no profit from this publication.
Actor, A One-Shot
Distract him was what she had said, before jetting off to God knew where, leaving him to the mercies (Or rather, not-so-merciful) of a being that resembled Death more than he or any other person in Soul Society ever would.
Gegtsuburi was in hand; his foe only stood still.
He fought back a shiver as the crowned skull regarded him coldly. Distract him. Distract him. Distract him. The words rung in his mind, almost driving him insane. Distract this monster? How could he? Even his Captain had been forced to rethink a strategy and make a temporary retreat. The bastard was powerful, very powerful. And scary as shit. Not forgetting that. The guy had almost killed Captain Soi Fong. He had to do something to keep the bastard from ending him right - !
There was always that.
He had no choice. None whatsoever.
He had to do it.
Even if thereÆd be Hell to pay by the end of this.
So, knowing full well of what was to come, the Vice-Captain of the S econd Division opened his mouth.
And talked.
Stance and tongue, repeat after me.
That same voice came to him.
ôYou know what my favourite pastime is?ö OmaedaÆs words left his lips, causing BarraganÆs attention to snap to his words. Good, he got the guyÆs attention. Now, slowly, he would keep talking. ôBack in Soul Society, my parents used to make me take acting lessons all the time.ö He finished his sentence with exasperation, as if the mere memory of the practice was more of a discomfort than his present situation.
No, no, no! This will not do: hands, legs, hips; remember this even if you die, Marechiyo-chan!
Barragan Luisenbarn said nothing, noting how the short CaptainÆs lackey massaged the side of his head, quite possibly feeling the headache of the days past. It must have been quite an experience if the fat idiot was bringing out in the midst of battle with an Espada. He would handle whatever else that came; he knew of that little witch scuttling off. He was prepared. For nowà before the kill, before that sweet sound of the ShinigamiÆs final screams, heÆd give the fat one his last words. He would entertain the idiot.
The end was inevitable.
Maybe a bit more powder, kiddo. Make-up!
ôYou see, I used to hate acting.ö His gruff voice went on, suddenly crossing his arms. ôI mean, essentially, it was about people pretending to be something they ainÆt. And Omaeda Marechiyo ainÆt nothing if not an honest guy, through and through!ö he huffed proudly, before drooping just a bit, some ten seconds later.
Fan, wave, fan, wave! ThatÆs it; youÆve got it! You were born for this part, Marechiyo-chan! Excellent!
Barragan said nothing, only to see the Shinigami proudly continue his stupid tirade.
ôActing is like lying. Only instead of just your mouth, everything, every part of your body, every motion ya make is a lie. It ainÆt you, you know.ö His voiced held some disgust, that much Barragan could tell. The way he moved, the way he spoke, the bastard was actually having a casual conversation with him. Laughable, this was, ôOn the stage, youÆre telling the audience a story; a story that isnÆt true. A figment of your æmagination brought to theatre. A play, a piece of fiction that was designed to entertain.ö
That audience is your Judge, Jury and Executioner, Marechiyo. Now, go out there my little Lion King!
OmaedaÆs gangly and chubby visage suddenly broke into a smile, and he scratched the back of his head, fondly remembering all the lessons, all the plays, the critique, the disappointment, the fooling around, the sheer fun he had. Changing expressions, method acting, everythingà everything was actually enjoyable in the end, all.
Not so much scrunching; relax your face a bit, you dolt!
ôBut æcha know, I really started enjoying it. Took me a year, but really, it kinda grew on me. Before you know it, I was in kabuki productions and plays all around Seireitei.ö He proudly declared his achievement, as if it was something that someone as mighty as an Espada would clap in awe and wonder. As if; the foolÆs words were entertaining, but impressed? Hardly so.
The most wonderous thing youÆll hear in theatre is the claps of your audience, Marechiyo-chan. The way everyone gets on their feet and cheering your performance. It is simply magical!
ôAnd between you and me, Mr Second Espada, some of the more independent productions in Rukongai.ö He smirked, remembering the way the kids looked at him with magical wonder. How the adults had fallen silent whenever he recited an aside, ôIt was something I never thought IÆd give a second glance, but I actually liked it. Hell, I loved it!ö
Remember, youÆre a wonderful, kind giant. Andà action!
It seemed that he was done. No words, no stupid spit flying all over in mid-air. Barragan decided that he had had enough, anyway, and brought up a skeletal hand, eyeholes boring into the brown orbs of his large opponent. It was time for this idiot to go wherever he had to.
ôWhy waste my time with such a bland and idiotic concept?ö he finally spoke, voice full of condescension. He did, however, appear slightly amused, ôAs much as I needed that to doze me off, if you are quite finished, fat oneà I believe that itÆs about time I ended this.ö
The black miasma rose once more as if it was a living being, moving as quick as lightning to turn the bastard to dust.
It didnÆt.
It caught Barragan off-guard.
Because the fat bastard had just used a Shunpo to appear a fifty feet to his right.
WHAT?!
Gegetsuburi in hand, Omaeda Marechiyo raised the sealed blade into the air, pointing skywards, brown eyes now showing more raw anger than anything, gazing right back into the abyss of darkness that was Barragan. The Skull Emperor motioned to OmaedaÆs position, indignant.
But Barragan was not faster.
Not this time.
It was time to drop the curtain. Pity, isnÆt it?
ôNo, actually, thereÆs a reason IÆm telling you all this.ö The Vice-Captain said in a bored tone, eyeing Barragan as nothing more than an obstacle.
He raised his flail and threw it to the clouds. The chain followed. When had the bastard released it?
ôYa see, the thing isàö he paused. ôIÆm a really good actor.ö
And brought the damn thing down.
And turnà and bow.
Barragan looked upwards, eyes widening as a eight-hundred foot spiked ball plummeted from the sky. Grey and effing godddamn huge. The miasma rose to meet its foe, hopefully to erode the damn thing away before it could û
Too late.
The battlefield exploded. Captains and Espada darted their eyes to the sight, Some moving out of the way to avoid flying debris generated from the impact.
The damage was catastrophic.
A gigantic crater had made itself known to those present, incredibly wide and insanely deep. The ground under them was probably eighty-five percent Omaeda-made crater, which said a lot of the Fake Karakura TownÆs state.
Ukitake Jyuushirou was the first one to come out of the goldfish-like expression the Espada and Captains seemed to have adopted.
There was no sign of the Espada but for a skeletal hand lying on the wayside.
OmaedaÆs cold eyes regarded the massively enlarged wrecking ball, then to his chain.
ôBan-Kai.ö
He heard the clap of his excitable old mentor.
Excellent work, Marechiyo-chan, Bravo! Bravo!
And bowed.
/-/-/-/
Fin
/-/-/-/
Actor, A One-Shot
Distract him was what she had said, before jetting off to God knew where, leaving him to the mercies (Or rather, not-so-merciful) of a being that resembled Death more than he or any other person in Soul Society ever would.
Gegtsuburi was in hand; his foe only stood still.
He fought back a shiver as the crowned skull regarded him coldly. Distract him. Distract him. Distract him. The words rung in his mind, almost driving him insane. Distract this monster? How could he? Even his Captain had been forced to rethink a strategy and make a temporary retreat. The bastard was powerful, very powerful. And scary as shit. Not forgetting that. The guy had almost killed Captain Soi Fong. He had to do something to keep the bastard from ending him right - !
There was always that.
He had no choice. None whatsoever.
He had to do it.
Even if thereÆd be Hell to pay by the end of this.
So, knowing full well of what was to come, the Vice-Captain of the S econd Division opened his mouth.
And talked.
Stance and tongue, repeat after me.
That same voice came to him.
ôYou know what my favourite pastime is?ö OmaedaÆs words left his lips, causing BarraganÆs attention to snap to his words. Good, he got the guyÆs attention. Now, slowly, he would keep talking. ôBack in Soul Society, my parents used to make me take acting lessons all the time.ö He finished his sentence with exasperation, as if the mere memory of the practice was more of a discomfort than his present situation.
No, no, no! This will not do: hands, legs, hips; remember this even if you die, Marechiyo-chan!
Barragan Luisenbarn said nothing, noting how the short CaptainÆs lackey massaged the side of his head, quite possibly feeling the headache of the days past. It must have been quite an experience if the fat idiot was bringing out in the midst of battle with an Espada. He would handle whatever else that came; he knew of that little witch scuttling off. He was prepared. For nowà before the kill, before that sweet sound of the ShinigamiÆs final screams, heÆd give the fat one his last words. He would entertain the idiot.
The end was inevitable.
Maybe a bit more powder, kiddo. Make-up!
ôYou see, I used to hate acting.ö His gruff voice went on, suddenly crossing his arms. ôI mean, essentially, it was about people pretending to be something they ainÆt. And Omaeda Marechiyo ainÆt nothing if not an honest guy, through and through!ö he huffed proudly, before drooping just a bit, some ten seconds later.
Fan, wave, fan, wave! ThatÆs it; youÆve got it! You were born for this part, Marechiyo-chan! Excellent!
Barragan said nothing, only to see the Shinigami proudly continue his stupid tirade.
ôActing is like lying. Only instead of just your mouth, everything, every part of your body, every motion ya make is a lie. It ainÆt you, you know.ö His voiced held some disgust, that much Barragan could tell. The way he moved, the way he spoke, the bastard was actually having a casual conversation with him. Laughable, this was, ôOn the stage, youÆre telling the audience a story; a story that isnÆt true. A figment of your æmagination brought to theatre. A play, a piece of fiction that was designed to entertain.ö
That audience is your Judge, Jury and Executioner, Marechiyo. Now, go out there my little Lion King!
OmaedaÆs gangly and chubby visage suddenly broke into a smile, and he scratched the back of his head, fondly remembering all the lessons, all the plays, the critique, the disappointment, the fooling around, the sheer fun he had. Changing expressions, method acting, everythingà everything was actually enjoyable in the end, all.
Not so much scrunching; relax your face a bit, you dolt!
ôBut æcha know, I really started enjoying it. Took me a year, but really, it kinda grew on me. Before you know it, I was in kabuki productions and plays all around Seireitei.ö He proudly declared his achievement, as if it was something that someone as mighty as an Espada would clap in awe and wonder. As if; the foolÆs words were entertaining, but impressed? Hardly so.
The most wonderous thing youÆll hear in theatre is the claps of your audience, Marechiyo-chan. The way everyone gets on their feet and cheering your performance. It is simply magical!
ôAnd between you and me, Mr Second Espada, some of the more independent productions in Rukongai.ö He smirked, remembering the way the kids looked at him with magical wonder. How the adults had fallen silent whenever he recited an aside, ôIt was something I never thought IÆd give a second glance, but I actually liked it. Hell, I loved it!ö
Remember, youÆre a wonderful, kind giant. Andà action!
It seemed that he was done. No words, no stupid spit flying all over in mid-air. Barragan decided that he had had enough, anyway, and brought up a skeletal hand, eyeholes boring into the brown orbs of his large opponent. It was time for this idiot to go wherever he had to.
ôWhy waste my time with such a bland and idiotic concept?ö he finally spoke, voice full of condescension. He did, however, appear slightly amused, ôAs much as I needed that to doze me off, if you are quite finished, fat oneà I believe that itÆs about time I ended this.ö
The black miasma rose once more as if it was a living being, moving as quick as lightning to turn the bastard to dust.
It didnÆt.
It caught Barragan off-guard.
Because the fat bastard had just used a Shunpo to appear a fifty feet to his right.
WHAT?!
Gegetsuburi in hand, Omaeda Marechiyo raised the sealed blade into the air, pointing skywards, brown eyes now showing more raw anger than anything, gazing right back into the abyss of darkness that was Barragan. The Skull Emperor motioned to OmaedaÆs position, indignant.
But Barragan was not faster.
Not this time.
It was time to drop the curtain. Pity, isnÆt it?
ôNo, actually, thereÆs a reason IÆm telling you all this.ö The Vice-Captain said in a bored tone, eyeing Barragan as nothing more than an obstacle.
He raised his flail and threw it to the clouds. The chain followed. When had the bastard released it?
ôYa see, the thing isàö he paused. ôIÆm a really good actor.ö
And brought the damn thing down.
And turnà and bow.
Barragan looked upwards, eyes widening as a eight-hundred foot spiked ball plummeted from the sky. Grey and effing godddamn huge. The miasma rose to meet its foe, hopefully to erode the damn thing away before it could û
Too late.
The battlefield exploded. Captains and Espada darted their eyes to the sight, Some moving out of the way to avoid flying debris generated from the impact.
The damage was catastrophic.
A gigantic crater had made itself known to those present, incredibly wide and insanely deep. The ground under them was probably eighty-five percent Omaeda-made crater, which said a lot of the Fake Karakura TownÆs state.
Ukitake Jyuushirou was the first one to come out of the goldfish-like expression the Espada and Captains seemed to have adopted.
There was no sign of the Espada but for a skeletal hand lying on the wayside.
OmaedaÆs cold eyes regarded the massively enlarged wrecking ball, then to his chain.
ôBan-Kai.ö
He heard the clap of his excitable old mentor.
Excellent work, Marechiyo-chan, Bravo! Bravo!
And bowed.
/-/-/-/
Fin
/-/-/-/
