Summary: Naruto was born an Uchiha descendant as well as Uzumaki; however, that doesn’t change his personality, or make him hugely talented immediately. Unfortunately for him, things are made harder rather than easier. More alert enemies, a hateful fox; even Konoha is more wary. Sharingan-Naruto.
Alt. Summary: Madara was Minato's father, causing a divergence since early on. Less AU than it seems. Sharingan!Naruto - though his personality is mostly intact.
Rated T for Naruto’s occasional potty mouth, as well as some violence.
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Chapter 1, Full
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“Yosh!” Naruto said to himself, “let’s get started!” And unrolled the Forbidden Scroll of Seals carefully, noting that it looked rather strange; a bit too clear, really, like he had put on glasses for near-sightedness or maybe asti-whatever. 'Can’t be,' he reasoned, 'my eyesight is twenty-twenty, maybe better.' So he just chalked it up to the Scroll being special, and proceeded.
He looked at the first jutsu on the scroll, called the Shadow Clone. Seeing that it was B-ranked, he skipped to the next one… which was a bigger version of the same, the Mass Shadow Clone. Clone Great Explosion; needs the Shadow Clone, and A-ranked.
Object Shadow Clone, Shuriken Shadow Clone… Karyuu Endan (Fire Dragon Flare Bullet); B-ranked, and needs months or years of training in Fire Release; Gouka Mekkyaku (Great Fire Annihilation) and Gouka Messhitsu (Great Fire Destruction), the same. Kokuangyo no jutsu (Bringer of Darkness technique); an A-ranked genjutsu.
Kuchiyose: Rashomon; a defensive jutsu -enough said- and B-rank too; the Eight Gates: the Scroll said it would take months to unlock those Chakra points in the way shown. Tips on using Katon and Fuuton for Intermediate and Advanced Users, by Uchiha Madara; nice, but not what Naruto was looking for.
A suicide jutsu! Another sacrificial jutsu; A Treatise on Tridimensional Sealing and Seals based on N-dimensional Coordinate Systems, by Senju Mito; Edo Tensei: brings back the dead by sacrificing living people….
Naruto looked at the scroll, then at the sky, then back again. He lifted his hands, and shouted, “what the FUCK is this SHIT!”
The young boy lied down on the dirt, frustrated. There was nothing he could use in the stupid scroll; it was supposed to have jutsu a Genin could learn, but he found nothing below B-rank; as in Jounin-level. Some of the contents were horribly complicated, too, or just plain HORRIBLE; like the B-rank and A-rank techniques weren’t enough! Was Mizuki-sensei playing a mean trick on him? Or was it something more serious?
Still, Naruto decided to start over; he lifted the Scroll again and looked at the Shadow Clone, this time willing to risk his life to learn it-
Someone landed on the clearing. Naruto tensed, expecting Mizuki and being suspicious of the man.
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Kurama opened his eyes. That was a surprise, and definitely not a pleasant one. As soon as he allowed his Chakra to mix with his container’s more actively than before, the boy awakened the last bloodline he expected his host to have. 'And I was glad for a second that I had a container who actually is willing to do what he needs to to get stronger. Of course he's like that; he's a member of that clan....'
Still, the situation wasn’t completely unsalvageable. While he didn’t have the influence on the brat’s system needed to permanently seal away his Sharingan, and even if he got more influence, it would be too late to manage anything… well, Kurama could stop those accursed eyes from working for the time being, and the brat would need to get them again, the hard way. Hopefully, by the time the Sharingan had the chance to awaken anew, his current container would have gotten himself killed.
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Mizuki landed inside the clearing the idiot fox boy was supposed to be in. 'Thank the gods', he thought, 'for a moment, I thought he would be stupid or lucky enough to get lost, and delay my plans.'
“There you are, Naruto,” Mizuki said, pretending at joviality. ‘I’m really looking forward to the damned monster’s look of despair,’ he thought.
The little monster greeted Mizuki warily, making him think, ‘so the little shit isn’t as stupid as it pretends to be. Yet another point to my belief he is the actual fox.’ Out loud, the man said, “so, you did realize the other point of the test was about not trying any of the fake jutsu? I don’t see you out with Chakra exhaustion, after all.”
The monster was hiding behind the Scroll, nearly making Mizuki scoff. It threw the Scroll at Mizuki, which the man’s arms reflexively tried to catch, only for his feet to launch him away and down with an accompanying burst of Chakra, something that saved him from the two explosive tags attached to the Kunai Naruto threw.
“Nice- nice False Surroundings genjutsu, fox,” an only somewhat injured Mizuki said, “it’s too bad for you that your Control sucks in this form, otherwise, I wouldn’t have been any the wiser; your attention to detail is, indeed, worthy of a Youko (Demon Fox).”
“I can’t understand; how come I fell for your act? Well, I was going to ask you why you are doing this, but it’s obvious you’re just a crazy bastard, Mizuki-sensei- I mean, Mizuki,” the monster in human form said cheekily, “so why wouldn’t you try to get your hands on a Scroll with high-level kinjutsu…?”
Mizuki sneered at the brat that had the audacity to call him a crazy bastard; he, the Demon Fox itself! He said, “You were desperate to become a ninja, to manage your plans of revenge, obviously. Heh, but what are you going to do now, fox?” Twirling a Fuuma shuriken, “I’m not going to fall for another genjutsu, and even injured as I am, you are no match for me currently-”
Before Mizuki had even started saying the final word, he threw the shuriken he was holding, then threw another behind it in the ‘shadow shuriken’ maneuver, hiding it in the shadow of the first one.
The brat managed to avoid the first fuuma shuriken; barely. The second one neared it while completely off-balance, set to behead the filthy creature. Mizuki smiled in glee- CLANG! The weapon was deflected... by the Sandaime. Oh shit. Time to bullshit like mad and hope for the best.
“Hokage-sama!” Mizuki said, “I was about to apprehend the- brat, but he tried to kill me. My apologies for using lethal force-”
The killing intent coming from that short frame was nothing short of paralyzing. Mizuki had been a Chuunin for years, and even had the Chakra reserves of a very strong Jounin. All of that, though, paled before the older-looking monster in human form. ‘Is that what the power of an S-rank ninja feels like? What a monster….’
“No, Mizuki,” the Sandaime said, “this is what the power of my Shadow Clone feels like; the real Sarutobi Hiruzen is elsewhere,” all the while tying him up with Chakra-resistant wire.
“Hokage-sama and I heard everything, Mizuki. Why? Why would you betray the village?” Iruka, who had also shown up but barely registered in Mizuki’s perception due to the sheer overwhelming presence of the fucking old monster, said.
Mizuki sneered in disgust. He just about had it with the self-righteous bastard. He said, “are you serious, Iruka? Do you really believe all that crap you often spout about the ‘Will of Fire’? My uncle -Hatake Sakumo- was driven to suicide, and even Kakashi was being persecuted; for what? For Uncle following the philosophy of this backstabbing village?
>> For being the son of a shinobi who served the village faithfully for three decades? We were both left with no family at nine for idiotic reasons -my mother was on her last legs then already-, but that little shit Kakashi was still more loyal than the damned Hokage! Then, when I followed the REAL philosophy of this hellhole, I was barred from promotion; ha! What hypocrisy. I could have been a Tokubetsu Jounin, or even a full-fledged one by now!
>> But the cherry on top was the survival of this creature. Minato-sama was the only one I looked up to, and-”
Mizuki barely managed to realize he had been struck on the head. He didn’t even see it coming, everything simply went dark.
-----
“I need to debrief you, Naruto,” the Old Man said, something Naruto had dreaded. “Now, now,” he added, “there’s no need to be alarmed, it’s just Iruka and I here. It’s not an interrogation,” smiling benevolently.
“Okay,” Naruto said, nodding. He described what happened from the moment Mizuki tricked him, to the Sexy Jutsu he used on the Old Man (something which made Iruka look at the old Hokage in a disappointed and surprised way, and the latter blush; though his sensei did mention that directly assaulting the Hokage was a treasonous action; not that his ‘assault’ counted as direct).
Then, the boy recounted everything he saw in the Forbidden Scroll (none of which he read closely enough to remember, though he did skim through them). Finally, he told them how he realized that Mizuki had tricked him.
“Hmm. So, you went for two genjutsu-covered explosive tags from the beginning? What made you go for the kill - were you that certain of Mizuki’s guilt?” The Old Man asked.
Naruto shook his head in denial. He said, “no, I wasn’t going for the kill. I knew Mizuki is a strong Chuunin and was hoping that the explosion would both injure him enough that I could get away, and attract the attention of the ANBU. I was at a disadvantage, so I couldn’t afford to hold back. Besides, I had realized that the jutsu in the Scroll weren’t fake, so when he used that excuse, he tipped me off.”
The Old Man slowly nodded. He said, “yes, I can understand that; in this case, you acted correctly. On the other hand, you should strive not to end up alone with a near-Jounin-level ninja who might be a traitor again. Not to mention avoid such dangerous maneuvers as using two explosive tags when you aren’t certain the one you’re attacking is an enemy or an ally except in the direst of circumstances.”
Naruto felt ashamed he had been tricked so easily, so he promised not to act so naively again.
"With that said, I've decided: despite your careless mistake -which you compensated for, fully-, for exemplary performance on the field of duty, as well as apprehending a traitor of at least Chuunin level and being skilled enough in Genjutsu to make a Chuunin proud, I hereby promote you, Academy Student Uzumaki Naruto, to Genin," The Old Man- no, the Hokage, said, authority heavy in his voice.
Naruto stood frozen for a few moments, then he cheered when what the Hokage said sank in, but he controlled himself and stopped immediately. He said, bowing deep, "thank you, Hokage-sama. I humbly accept the promotion. I won't disappoint you."
Iruka broke the ensuing silence, saying, "so you can be polite when you want to! You little brat!" His eyebrows twitching in irritation.
The laughter the other two let out further incensed the Academy teacher, but he let it go.
“So, do you have any questions, Naruto?” The Old Man asked in a serious tone, and the atmosphere in his office suddenly became heavy once more - but somehow even worse than before.
The boy nodded carefully, and said, “are you gonna tell me about my family and why I’m hated now, Old Man?”
The old Hokage said, “of course; I promised, did I not? But first things first: I wasn’t telling the whole truth when I said only the three of us were here.” Then, he made a gesture and someone appeared.
“It’s Kurenai-sensei?!” Naruto said (shouted), very loudly, pleasantly surprised to see his former tutor on such an occasion. “Ehehe. Sorry,” he said afterwards, apologizing for not using his ‘inside voice’.
The woman smiled and greeted Naruto, unfazed by his loudness and refraining from scolding him, for once. “I was told by Hokage-sama to help explain some things,” she said.
“This isn’t about the sex talk again, is it?” Naruto asked, faking exasperation.
Iruka slapped Naruto upside the head, making his own head bigger with a certain jutsu. He said, “you MORON! What do you think you’re saying? Hmmm, of course, if you lack some information about the facts of life, I could always give you one of my infamous lectures. Well, I’ll go ahead and clear my schedule for seven hours-”
“Noooo!” Naruto shouted, “anything but that, Iruka-sensei!”
After a rather comical scene, with Naruto flailing his hands in panic, they went back to business.
“So, Naruto. That piece of information; it’s protected as an S-rank secret,” Kurenai said, “it has been for over a decade.”
Naruto listened attentively. Seeing that he wasn’t going to interrupt her, she continued, saying, “do you remember what the history books say about the fight between the Yondaime and the Nine-Tails?”
The boy hummed in affirmative, dreading what might come next.
Kurenai spoke of the need to seal Tailed Beasts to defeat them, of Jinchuuriki, and told Naruto the fate of the Kyuubi, twelve years before.
Naruto had a lot of questions in his mind, but one came out of his mouth first: “Why was I chosen?” He asked.
Kurenai looked Naruto in the eyes and said, “your mother was known to have Uzumaki ancestry; the Uzumaki clan had a special kind of Chakra, more potent and plentiful than most, thus especially good for containing Bijuu. One can tell if a person has inherited the Uzumaki Chakra and vitality in full by the color of that person’s Chakra - true Uzumaki had bright yellow or sometimes green-colored Chakra.
>>Another reason you were chosen was because you had been born that day; the younger a person is, the better they can adapt to Bijuu Chakra. It has been speculated that because of the presence of the Kyuubi, the pregnancy of your mother did not last nine months, as is usual. You were born as soon as it appeared.”
“So,” Naruto asked, “because I’m an Uzumaki and was born prema- prima- prematurely, or whatever that’s called, I was saddled with a giant fox?”
The Sandaime and Kurenai looked at each other, worried. “Yes, that’s the gist of it,” the woman said.
Naruto couldn’t help it; he laughed. He laughed long and hard, with more than a touch of hysteria. Kurenai put a hand on his shoulder in comfort, but the boy didn’t acknowledge it in any way.
After a minute of hysterical laughter, Naruto stopped and wiped his eyes of tears. He said, “sorry about that. Just appreciating the irony. The Old Man always said I wasn’t hated because of who my parents were, but that’s technically wrong- I mean, false. I thought I’d be happy to find out about my mother; now, I’m not sure.”
The other people present did not have an answer to that.
“So,” Naruto said, breaking the silence, “does that mean those who called me a monster behind my back were right?”
Kurenai looked at him sternly. She said, “I’ve taught you Fuuinjutsu myself. You know fully well that that doesn’t make you a monster.”
After a few reassurances from the other males present, especially Iruka, things went like this:
“Wait, Iruka-sensei. Didn’t the fox kill your parents?” Naruto asked, puzzled and worried.
“It did,” the older male replied, “don’t worry, that won’t be a problem. I don’t hate you, Naruto.”
“You did at first, though,” Naruto said, showing that he was a lot more perceptive than he seemed to be.
Iruka nodded in admittance. He said, “I did. It took me a while to come to terms with your status as the container, and even longer to speak to you without awkwardness getting in the way. But you already knew that, didn’t you?” Iruka said, ruffling Naruto’s hair, “you’re much smarter than people give you credit for. You’re truly… one of my excellent students. Even if you get distracted too easily.”
Naruto was truly touched. Of course, he hid it behind indignation. He said, “way to ruin the moment, Iruka-sensei. For the record, your lectures are too boring.”
“You little brat,” Iruka said, “it seems I shouldn’t buy you ramen at Ichiraku’s, after all,” hiding a smirk.
Naruto started pleading with his Academy teacher, but soon noticed the smirk, and pouted at Iruka -though he would deny it was a pout, without a doubt-, saying, “that was cruel, Iruka-sensei.”
Kurenai and the Third had wide smiles on their faces.
The moment was interrupted by, of all people, Konohamaru. “Old Geezer!” The boy shouted, “I heard both Naruto-niichan and Kurenai-sensei were around- oh, hi, Kurenai-sensei!” Though as soon as he saw his tutor’s expression, he shrank in fear.
“Konohamaru,” Kurenai said, “what have I told you about barging into the Hokage’s office -or anyone’s office or room- without knocking, much less shouting at the same time?”
“Uhhh. Not to?” Konohamaru said, still a bit scared.
“Yes,” Kurenai said in reply, then followed with, “tell me, Honorable Grandson, what did you just do?”
The young boy shrank into himself more; she only called him that when she was angry. He said, “sorry. I’m sorry, Kurenai-sensei! I was too enthusiastic to remember my manners.”
“Okay, forgiven,” the female tutor said calmly, showing an impressive turn of emotions.
All males present, even the Sandaime, thought that they would never understand women.
“Oh, Naruto-niichan,” Konohamaru said, “do you have time to play ninja?”
Naruto thought back to the information he had gotten on his mother, and decided he wanted more. He said, “sorry Konohamaru - we still haven’t finished our conversation. You know, between adults -ttebayo,” showing off his brand new forehead protector, though it was around his neck, green goggles still tied at forehead height.
Konohamaru was a bit disappointed, but he mainly marveled at his older brother figure being ‘a real ninja’, as the brown-haired Academy student put it.
After the young boy left (along with Iruka, who cited the need to keep an eye on said troublemaker), Naruto was told about his mother by Kurenai (who had been taught how to turn her Chakra into its Yin Release equivalent by the woman, though she wasn’t her Jounin sensei) and the Sandaime, though the latter didn’t know her quite as well.
So, Naruto found out about Uzumaki Kushina, also known as the Red Hot-Blooded Habanero and a few other aliases.*
-----
Iruka was announcing the teams. Everyone was paying attention, even Naruto. (Except Shikamaru, most likely.)
“Teams Three, Six, Nine, Eleven and a few higher numbers are still active and Genin, so….”
The young Chuunin rattled off a few teams, and voices of both happiness and disappointment sounded off. Then, he reached the number seven.
“Team Seven,” Iruka said, “is comprised of Haruno Sakura, Uzumaki Naruto and Uchiha Sasuke.”
Sakura threw a triumphant look at Ino, who frowned a bit, but said nothing. Naruto had mixed feelings on both his teammates, so he simply stayed quiet (and doesn’t that sound like an oxymoron).
Iruka proceeded onto Team Eight, which had Hinata, Shino and Kiba. The blue-haired girl threw a quick, slightly disappointed look at Naruto, but then, she took charge and, without speaking, forced Kiba to sit next to Shino along with her.
Team Ten had Ino, Shikamaru and Chouji. Shikamaru lifted his head and hand a bit to show Chouji a raised thumb. Ino sighed a bit in resignation; she seemed to have expected the outcome.
After a final, shorter lecture by Iruka, the new Genin were told to wait for their teachers in the classroom. The first one there was Kurenai, who had been hidden under a simple Cloak of Disguise, staying undetected by all. When she said she was there for Team Eight, Naruto slumped down in disappointment.
The woman gave a (very short) lecture on awareness to all the Genin present, making more than one kunoichi look at her in awe after her display of Jounin-level stealth, since even Iruka (who immediately left with his head down) had been surprised by the woman’s sudden appearance, though at least, he had drawn a weapon.
Team Ten was also headed by a kunoichi, this one over sixty years old, who introduced herself as Sarutobi Biwako. She had the kanji for ‘four’ on the shoulder of her dress, which she said was there because the Fourth Hokage saved her life at great cost to himself when asked.
Shikamaru privately thought that ‘Death(*2)’ described the fate of anyone who was made her student rather well. He never thought he would meet a woman more troublesome than his mother.
-----
After a long, long time waiting, Naruto decided to prank their new sensei. So, he put a chalkboard eraser above the door, honestly not in the mood to bother setting up something elaborate. Besides, you can’t beat the classics.
Sasuke called Naruto a fool, telling him not to bother using traps against a Jounin. The blond boy shrugged, while Sakura looked at the setup in thinly veiled interest.
The sound of a throat clearing tipped them off to someone present in front of an open window, on the inside. The man was tall and a bit thin, with hair of a shade that reminded Naruto of Mizuki and a single uncovered eye.
The man took in the kunai all three had drawn, and closed his eye, crinkling his visible face in what the three new Genin could somehow tell was a smile. “Well,” he said, “it seems I could grow to like you guys, if we don’t part ways immediately. Though the fact you didn’t detect me for over three hours is a serious negative - it’s not like I bothered to hide besides being outside behind a half-closed window.”
Sasuke and even Naruto were silent and vigilant still, so Sakura took initiative. She said, “are you our sensei? And what do you mean by ‘parting ways immediately’?”
“Aah,” the man said, “I’m Team Seven’s sensei, Hatake Kakashi. As for the other part of your question - the Jounin have the right to reject any prospective student that didn’t pass the test given. So, yes, there is a test you have yet to pass; if you ever do,” chuckling under his breath just loud enough to be heard when he said the last part.
Naruto was still looking at the man in suspicion, though he had lowered (not sheathed) his kunai. Sasuke, on the other hand, was cool as a cucumber once more, even if an undercurrent of fear, then determination didn’t escape Kakashi’s gaze. Sakura whispered: “the Academy test is just to weed out those who are completely inept,” making Naruto glare at her, turning her expression sheepish.
Sasuke was watching the interactions with well-hidden interest - well-hidden for a Genin, that is. So the kid took after his clan’s most-signed contract more than his Academy teachers let on; and even if curiosity killed the cat, in this case, it could only spell positive things - especially since it showed he didn’t look down upon his current teammates as much as expected.
“Well,” Kakashi said out loud, “you have interesting dynamics, I’ll give you that much. Now, you are going to meet me in Training Ground Three in twenty minutes.
>>Don’t be late; I certainly won’t be…,” laughing sinisterly after the last part and leaving with a swirl of leaves.
“Okay,” Naruto said, “time to go!”
Sakura, on the other hand, halted both of the boys by grabbing their collars and knocking their heads together, much to their protest. After they got over the dizziness, of course.
“Hey, what’s the big idea!?” Naruto said, rubbing his forehead.
Sasuke simply glared at Sakura venomously, though she had his attention.
The sole female of Team Seven said, “we’ve got to stick together - have you forgotten how important teamwork is supposed to be for Konoha shinobi?”
Sasuke snorted. He said, “why should we listen to you?”
Sakura could see that Naruto agreed with Sasuke, even if he didn’t say anything. Ignoring the hurt, she said, “would the other agree to anything, if one of you two called the shots?”
After the message sank in, Sasuke said, “what would you have us do?” Showing his acceptance of Sakura’s (temporary?) leadership.
The young kunoichi told them they should ask where Training Ground Three was, then run like they were being chased by snake summons; but stick together, regardless.
At Naruto’s suggestion, they headed for the Hokage’s office, by far the nearest place that had any shinobi, mainly because the Academy was technically closed that day.
-----
“Hey, Old Man,” Naruto said, happy as ever.
Both Sasuke and Sakura were wide-eyed (the latter more visibly than the former), and Sakura barely managed to keep from scolding her teammate, now believing his claims that he knew the village leader personally.
Sarutobi greeted his surrogate grandson, smiling behind the pipe he was smoking. After Naruto explained what he wanted, the old man said, “that’s all well and good, Naruto, but I’ve already told you that after you graduated, you would have to trade favors - like most shinobi do.”
“Huh, you did?” Naruto said. Then, it clicked. He said, “oh, when you got me Kurenai-sensei as a tutor. Now I remember. Still, it’s something we could learn from any shinobi, right?”
Sarutobi said, “well reasoned, Naruto, but the missions office is closed right now - nobody is around and, knowing Kakashi, you’re on a time limit. So, what will it be?” Smiling serenely.
Naruto nodded resignedly and said, “fine; name your terms, Old Man.”
After the terms had been agreed to, the three Genin-to-be set out for Training Ground Three… running like crazy.
-----
The training ground was practically on the opposite side of the village as compared to the Academy, so the three young shinobi candidates arrived panting; they had wasted too much time with the information gathering.
The two non-blond Genin did not protest, though, because they knew that the Hokage himself WAS the fastest way to get the info, because only ANBU were around on team assignment day after the teachers left and ANBU were too reluctant to speak at all, granted they were even visible.
-----
“Ah! We ma- we made it,” Naruto said, slightly out of breath.
“Not quite,” a voice said behind them, making Naruto start and open his kunai pouch and the other two shiver (unfortunately for them, they were too out of breath by the frantic sprint to react more).
“Sensei,” Naruto said, worried that they would fail, “what was our time?” No trace of fatigue in his voice.
Kakashi shook his head. He said, “it took you twenty minutes and thirty-six seconds. Too bad,” closing his eye, smiling in his own way. ‘They arrived and gathered information together,’ the man thought, ‘first test, check.’
After the three Genin-to-be squirmed a bit (he didn’t even answer their questions on whether they failed), Kakashi opened his eye and said, all business, “that said, I can tell at least one of you is somewhat promising, so you will get a second chance; but it will be even harder: you have to steal certain items - from me.”
After that, the Genin were presented with two bells and told to go at him with the intent to kill. Kakashi also told them, “I’m not a Chuunin or a rookie Jounin. Go nuts.”
Sasuke looked at the man thoughtfully. He said, “Kakashi. Is there a particular reason there are only two bells?”
Kakashi nodded. He said, “of course. Many Jounin are not willing to take on a full team, though they usually take a single apprentice. That said, nobody in the past has gotten even one bell from me, so I wouldn’t even count on one of you becoming my apprentice. Well, if that’s all…,” setting an alarm clock for an hour later.
Naruto and Sasuke looked at each other; while they did not exactly like one another and weren’t friends, the two of them made an excellent team, able to use silent communication without even making hand signs.
After the Jounin said ‘start’, Naruto grabbed Sakura by the back of the collar, and headed for a relatively safe location; said girl was too smart to struggle, but the low growl-like noises that came out of her throat told him there’d be hell to pay later.
“Don’t look at me like that, Sakura,” the blond preteen said, “fair is fair.”
Sakura’s glare barely abated, even when Sasuke smirked at her - she simply turned her glare towards her crush without hesitation.
Naruto cleared his throat. He said, “on to serious matters - what did you want to say, Sasuke?”
Sasuke said, “there is something fish- dodge!”
Without questioning their teammate, Naruto and Sakura immediately vacated their locations, just in time for Kakashi and another Kakashi to attack them. “Huh,” the man said, “you guys are way too slow to hide. Are you going to confront me head-on?”
Sasuke made the hand signs for “stick together” and “regroup”. Naruto was a sensor of passable skill, so he would leave it to the other two to find him, drawing Kakashi’s attention on himself.
Sasuke didn’t react to Kakashi’s taunts; by the time one of the copies decided to follow the other two, Sasuke had finished his three hand-seals (Boar, Horse and Tiger).
-----
‘What the hell?’ Clone-Kakashi thought, ’a Genin managed to shorten a C-rank elemental jutsu’s hand seals? He might not even have Fire affinity, according to Umino Iruka!’
The other clone was consumed in the conflagration, but he used Kawarimi (Body Replacement) without seals to get away, then burrowed underground, managing to blindside Sasuke and bury him… only to get a seal-less stream of fire in the face and dispel while gloating.
-----
Sasuke coughed a bit and frowned at the pain of a burned mouth; he hadn’t yet learned to use the raw element very well. Several other Uchiha had managed that without any backlash by the time they were his age; he could barely melt a rock in his hand. ‘Well, at least I didn’t completely exhaust my Chakra,’ he thought, wishing that he could use Earth Release. Hopefully he hadn’t overestimated the other two - he believed they’d find and free him.
Sasuke’s breathing became faster; not because of claustrophobia, he didn’t suffer from such a thing. He simply remembered the last time he put his faith into someone else. Still, he controlled his breathing, pushed away the flashbacks (I won’t let That Man win! I will find somebody to trust, like Mom said!) and listened for the sounds of battle.
-----
‘Huh,’ Kakashi thought, ‘so Naruto IS a budding sensor, after all. Not a very good one, but now that he’s on his guard, he can avoid me as long as I don’t put in any effort in hiding.’
Still, the two Genin were not just avoiding him, they were closing in on Sasuke slowly but steadily. The man decided to increase the pressure.
-----
“Sakura!” Naruto said urgently, “our sensei is on the move again, this time faster! Make a dash for Sasuke; we have to split up this time!”
Sakura had resigned herself to following Naruto’s commands; he was a good tactician, better at thinking on his feet than her and Sasuke and more cunning than most gave him credit for.
The both of them made a run for it, only to be stopped by a mudslide.
“Are you guys going somewhere?” Kakashi asked, rhetorically.
After a brief battle between the three of them, a thirsty Sakura had to disengage from her taijutsu match with Kakashi, in which she went so far beyond her limits it was almost funny; she even used Yang Release to strengthen her body. Despite Naruto’s Genjutsu helping her, Kakashi was still an insurmountable obstacle. Fortunately, Naruto had a plan B.
Both twelve-year-olds threw smoke bombs, though a Wind ninjutsu on Kakashi’s part put an end to that. The man dispelled a genjutsu, then realized there was a second one. ‘Both of them can use Genjutsu proficiently, and the second illusion’s Chakra was too different for me to detect immediately.’
By the time he broke out, Naruto was long gone, but Sakura was still rather close. ‘Hmm,’ Kakashi thought, ‘is he leaving her behind because of no teamwork, or is their teamwork even better than I thought, and they’re going for a three-on-one?’ Out loud, he said, “so, Naruto left you behind. So much for friendship, huh?”
Clone-Sakura and the real one stopped. The former shook her head. ‘She’ said, “there is a reason for everything we have done thus far, Kakashi-sensei, as there is for everything you’ve done, I imagine.
Kakashi smiled. He said, “that’s all well and good, Sakura-chan, but do you really think you can disguise a simple clone and throw your voice so well that I’d be fooled? Then again, you ARE stalling for Naruto and Sasuke to come help you.”
The real Sakura didn’t flinch at the first revelation, but when he mentioned Naruto and Sasuke’s presumed parts in the plan, Sakura suddenly gasped, too imperceptibly for anyone but him and others with nin-animal-level senses to hear. The girl stopped hiding behind a tree and confronted her sensei directly.
Sakura said, “so I can’t avoid fighting you, huh?” Resigned to her fate, but still willing to fight, despite her thirst and fatigue.
“On the contrary,” Kakashi said, “I’ll just wait here. As long as you don’t try to go to your teammates and wait for them here, I will just chill,” getting an orange book out of his pouch, though he realized Sakura expected a weapon.
Now that he realized that Sakura (probably) hadn’t been abandoned, Kakashi would simply wait to see whether her teammates would come and get her. The man had suppressed his Chakra to the best of his ability (which meant very, very well) from the moment he realized what the team’s plan might be, to see if the boys’d go for his clone (which wasn’t hidden) or Sakura, who was supposedly alone.
The fact that he subconsciously thought of them as a team was a really good sign for their prospects, he mused. His concentration, though, was broken by the girl of the team.
Sakura said, “sensei, is this Icha Icha?”
The man responded with a, “hmm?”
The girl shook her head. She said, “your taste in smut is horrible, Kakashi-sensei,” shaking her head.
‘Does she mean she usually reads better smut?’ Kakashi thought, but knew better than to voice that out loud. So, he just giggled, allegedly at something in the book.
‘He’s probably doing this on purpose,’ Sakura thought, ‘I didn’t see him turn a page all this time.’ Her dry mouth kept her from commenting any further. Still, Sakura’s fists tightened in anger.
-----
Just after Naruto and Sasuke came back and prepared to fight Kakashi alongside Sakura, the alarm clock sounded off. Kakashi chuckled, while the rookie Genin hung their heads.
-----
Naruto had been tied to a post (for being the only one not to have a prolonged or successful fight against Kakashi), with the other Genin being left with a bottle of water each and getting the very stern warning not to give Naruto any. The three preteens were very thirsty, even the usually more durable Uzumaki, mostly due to Kakashi’s cunning.
Sasuke and Sakura drank a lot of water, but when they saw Naruto’s condition, the two of them stopped drinking. Then, Sasuke said, “do you sense Kakashi anywhere around here, Naruto?” When the blond boy answered in the negative, Sasuke offered him the bottle.
“Good point,” murmured Sakura, realizing that a weakened squad member would slow them down. “But wait,” she said, “why don’t why just cut Naruto free, then he gets our bottles himself? We technically won’t be breaking any of sensei’s orders.”
Sasuke nearly palmed his face for not thinking of that answer. After the team had all sated their thirst -with a bit of a speed bump- (“Sakura, wouldn’t that be an indirect kiss?” “Shut up and drink, Naruto, shannaro.”), Kakashi appeared… and nonchalantly threw the bells in front of his team.
Naruto scrunched up his face. He said, “Kakashi-sensei, why are you giving us the bells?”
“Consider it a reward for finding a loophole in my words. Seeing underneath the underneath, as it were,” Kakashi said. Then, he finished with, “besides, I’d like to see you squirm. Now, you will have to choose who goes back to the Academy yourselves; consider it practice for when you’re team leaders. If you are able to progress beyond today, that is,” chuckling again.
“Now, I get it,” Naruto said, grinning, “you never told us you wanted an apprentice and not a team, only what other Jounin prefer; that’s what had Sasuke so suspicious. At first, I thought you wanted to kick me out of the team, but… it’s teamwork, isn’t it? That’s what this test is about to begin with.”
Kakashi narrowed his visible eye and said, “does that mean you’re going to risk everything on your conclusion and give the others the bells?”
Naruto was about to reply, when Sasuke put a hand on his shoulder. The dark-haired boy said, “wait, Naruto. This should be a team decision.”
After a few seconds, Naruto nodded. After a few words traded between the three of them, they came to a decision. “We’re in agreement,” the blond boy said, “either we pass as a team, or we go back to the Academy as a team.”
“I see,” Kakashi said, “then, the answer is obvious: you all pass.”
The three Genin were speechless. Even though they had already figured out the answer, they couldn’t quite believe they had passed. Their teacher motioned for them to follow him. Less than a minute later, they arrived at the memorial stone.
Kakashi said, “this here is a stone for heroes; nearly all of my friends’ names are on it.”
The Genin kept silent, even Naruto being able to read the somber atmosphere.
Kakashi resumed his speech. He said, “it’s for those who died in the line of duty. I didn’t have good teamwork with my team as a Genin, even if we stayed together after promotion; I was a little prick then, so it was mostly my fault. Our horrible communication issues and clashing personalities led to my teammates both dying.
>>It’s said that those who abandon the mission are the trash of the ninja world. But, in the wise words of my late teammate, those who abandon their comrades are below trash.” Then, he looked at them, still solemn, saying, “don’t make the same mistakes I did.”
After a few minutes of silence, someone talked. “Kakashi-sensei,” Sakura asked, “what were your teammates’ names?”
“I’ll tell you kids another time,” Kakashi said, “I’ve had enough excitement for one day. Still, I have to admit that the teamwork you three displayed is far above anything my team had, even into our Chuunin years. Well, I wouldn’t have passed you otherwise.
>>By the way… you did reach the Training Ground in time, I simply lied.”
His students’ cries were music to Kakashi’s ears.
-----
-----
*Not Red Death! That’s up there with Kakashi/Itachi of the Sharingan in creativity, and worse in terms of being bad fanon.
*2 Four (Shi, or Yon) and Death (Shi) are homophones.
-Sorry about making Team Seven so good about teamwork, but they had to be; otherwise, this fic’s Kakashi would fail them come hell or high water. Besides, the test had a lot more nuances than the canon one, while not changing the spirit of it at all; I’m keeping with the theme of making things harder for this Naruto.
Alt. Summary: Madara was Minato's father, causing a divergence since early on. Less AU than it seems. Sharingan!Naruto - though his personality is mostly intact.
Rated T for Naruto’s occasional potty mouth, as well as some violence.
-----
Chapter 1, Full
-----
“Yosh!” Naruto said to himself, “let’s get started!” And unrolled the Forbidden Scroll of Seals carefully, noting that it looked rather strange; a bit too clear, really, like he had put on glasses for near-sightedness or maybe asti-whatever. 'Can’t be,' he reasoned, 'my eyesight is twenty-twenty, maybe better.' So he just chalked it up to the Scroll being special, and proceeded.
He looked at the first jutsu on the scroll, called the Shadow Clone. Seeing that it was B-ranked, he skipped to the next one… which was a bigger version of the same, the Mass Shadow Clone. Clone Great Explosion; needs the Shadow Clone, and A-ranked.
Object Shadow Clone, Shuriken Shadow Clone… Karyuu Endan (Fire Dragon Flare Bullet); B-ranked, and needs months or years of training in Fire Release; Gouka Mekkyaku (Great Fire Annihilation) and Gouka Messhitsu (Great Fire Destruction), the same. Kokuangyo no jutsu (Bringer of Darkness technique); an A-ranked genjutsu.
Kuchiyose: Rashomon; a defensive jutsu -enough said- and B-rank too; the Eight Gates: the Scroll said it would take months to unlock those Chakra points in the way shown. Tips on using Katon and Fuuton for Intermediate and Advanced Users, by Uchiha Madara; nice, but not what Naruto was looking for.
A suicide jutsu! Another sacrificial jutsu; A Treatise on Tridimensional Sealing and Seals based on N-dimensional Coordinate Systems, by Senju Mito; Edo Tensei: brings back the dead by sacrificing living people….
Naruto looked at the scroll, then at the sky, then back again. He lifted his hands, and shouted, “what the FUCK is this SHIT!”
The young boy lied down on the dirt, frustrated. There was nothing he could use in the stupid scroll; it was supposed to have jutsu a Genin could learn, but he found nothing below B-rank; as in Jounin-level. Some of the contents were horribly complicated, too, or just plain HORRIBLE; like the B-rank and A-rank techniques weren’t enough! Was Mizuki-sensei playing a mean trick on him? Or was it something more serious?
Still, Naruto decided to start over; he lifted the Scroll again and looked at the Shadow Clone, this time willing to risk his life to learn it-
Someone landed on the clearing. Naruto tensed, expecting Mizuki and being suspicious of the man.
-----
Kurama opened his eyes. That was a surprise, and definitely not a pleasant one. As soon as he allowed his Chakra to mix with his container’s more actively than before, the boy awakened the last bloodline he expected his host to have. 'And I was glad for a second that I had a container who actually is willing to do what he needs to to get stronger. Of course he's like that; he's a member of that clan....'
Still, the situation wasn’t completely unsalvageable. While he didn’t have the influence on the brat’s system needed to permanently seal away his Sharingan, and even if he got more influence, it would be too late to manage anything… well, Kurama could stop those accursed eyes from working for the time being, and the brat would need to get them again, the hard way. Hopefully, by the time the Sharingan had the chance to awaken anew, his current container would have gotten himself killed.
-----
Mizuki landed inside the clearing the idiot fox boy was supposed to be in. 'Thank the gods', he thought, 'for a moment, I thought he would be stupid or lucky enough to get lost, and delay my plans.'
“There you are, Naruto,” Mizuki said, pretending at joviality. ‘I’m really looking forward to the damned monster’s look of despair,’ he thought.
The little monster greeted Mizuki warily, making him think, ‘so the little shit isn’t as stupid as it pretends to be. Yet another point to my belief he is the actual fox.’ Out loud, the man said, “so, you did realize the other point of the test was about not trying any of the fake jutsu? I don’t see you out with Chakra exhaustion, after all.”
The monster was hiding behind the Scroll, nearly making Mizuki scoff. It threw the Scroll at Mizuki, which the man’s arms reflexively tried to catch, only for his feet to launch him away and down with an accompanying burst of Chakra, something that saved him from the two explosive tags attached to the Kunai Naruto threw.
“Nice- nice False Surroundings genjutsu, fox,” an only somewhat injured Mizuki said, “it’s too bad for you that your Control sucks in this form, otherwise, I wouldn’t have been any the wiser; your attention to detail is, indeed, worthy of a Youko (Demon Fox).”
“I can’t understand; how come I fell for your act? Well, I was going to ask you why you are doing this, but it’s obvious you’re just a crazy bastard, Mizuki-sensei- I mean, Mizuki,” the monster in human form said cheekily, “so why wouldn’t you try to get your hands on a Scroll with high-level kinjutsu…?”
Mizuki sneered at the brat that had the audacity to call him a crazy bastard; he, the Demon Fox itself! He said, “You were desperate to become a ninja, to manage your plans of revenge, obviously. Heh, but what are you going to do now, fox?” Twirling a Fuuma shuriken, “I’m not going to fall for another genjutsu, and even injured as I am, you are no match for me currently-”
Before Mizuki had even started saying the final word, he threw the shuriken he was holding, then threw another behind it in the ‘shadow shuriken’ maneuver, hiding it in the shadow of the first one.
The brat managed to avoid the first fuuma shuriken; barely. The second one neared it while completely off-balance, set to behead the filthy creature. Mizuki smiled in glee- CLANG! The weapon was deflected... by the Sandaime. Oh shit. Time to bullshit like mad and hope for the best.
“Hokage-sama!” Mizuki said, “I was about to apprehend the- brat, but he tried to kill me. My apologies for using lethal force-”
The killing intent coming from that short frame was nothing short of paralyzing. Mizuki had been a Chuunin for years, and even had the Chakra reserves of a very strong Jounin. All of that, though, paled before the older-looking monster in human form. ‘Is that what the power of an S-rank ninja feels like? What a monster….’
“No, Mizuki,” the Sandaime said, “this is what the power of my Shadow Clone feels like; the real Sarutobi Hiruzen is elsewhere,” all the while tying him up with Chakra-resistant wire.
“Hokage-sama and I heard everything, Mizuki. Why? Why would you betray the village?” Iruka, who had also shown up but barely registered in Mizuki’s perception due to the sheer overwhelming presence of the fucking old monster, said.
Mizuki sneered in disgust. He just about had it with the self-righteous bastard. He said, “are you serious, Iruka? Do you really believe all that crap you often spout about the ‘Will of Fire’? My uncle -Hatake Sakumo- was driven to suicide, and even Kakashi was being persecuted; for what? For Uncle following the philosophy of this backstabbing village?
>> For being the son of a shinobi who served the village faithfully for three decades? We were both left with no family at nine for idiotic reasons -my mother was on her last legs then already-, but that little shit Kakashi was still more loyal than the damned Hokage! Then, when I followed the REAL philosophy of this hellhole, I was barred from promotion; ha! What hypocrisy. I could have been a Tokubetsu Jounin, or even a full-fledged one by now!
>> But the cherry on top was the survival of this creature. Minato-sama was the only one I looked up to, and-”
Mizuki barely managed to realize he had been struck on the head. He didn’t even see it coming, everything simply went dark.
-----
“I need to debrief you, Naruto,” the Old Man said, something Naruto had dreaded. “Now, now,” he added, “there’s no need to be alarmed, it’s just Iruka and I here. It’s not an interrogation,” smiling benevolently.
“Okay,” Naruto said, nodding. He described what happened from the moment Mizuki tricked him, to the Sexy Jutsu he used on the Old Man (something which made Iruka look at the old Hokage in a disappointed and surprised way, and the latter blush; though his sensei did mention that directly assaulting the Hokage was a treasonous action; not that his ‘assault’ counted as direct).
Then, the boy recounted everything he saw in the Forbidden Scroll (none of which he read closely enough to remember, though he did skim through them). Finally, he told them how he realized that Mizuki had tricked him.
“Hmm. So, you went for two genjutsu-covered explosive tags from the beginning? What made you go for the kill - were you that certain of Mizuki’s guilt?” The Old Man asked.
Naruto shook his head in denial. He said, “no, I wasn’t going for the kill. I knew Mizuki is a strong Chuunin and was hoping that the explosion would both injure him enough that I could get away, and attract the attention of the ANBU. I was at a disadvantage, so I couldn’t afford to hold back. Besides, I had realized that the jutsu in the Scroll weren’t fake, so when he used that excuse, he tipped me off.”
The Old Man slowly nodded. He said, “yes, I can understand that; in this case, you acted correctly. On the other hand, you should strive not to end up alone with a near-Jounin-level ninja who might be a traitor again. Not to mention avoid such dangerous maneuvers as using two explosive tags when you aren’t certain the one you’re attacking is an enemy or an ally except in the direst of circumstances.”
Naruto felt ashamed he had been tricked so easily, so he promised not to act so naively again.
"With that said, I've decided: despite your careless mistake -which you compensated for, fully-, for exemplary performance on the field of duty, as well as apprehending a traitor of at least Chuunin level and being skilled enough in Genjutsu to make a Chuunin proud, I hereby promote you, Academy Student Uzumaki Naruto, to Genin," The Old Man- no, the Hokage, said, authority heavy in his voice.
Naruto stood frozen for a few moments, then he cheered when what the Hokage said sank in, but he controlled himself and stopped immediately. He said, bowing deep, "thank you, Hokage-sama. I humbly accept the promotion. I won't disappoint you."
Iruka broke the ensuing silence, saying, "so you can be polite when you want to! You little brat!" His eyebrows twitching in irritation.
The laughter the other two let out further incensed the Academy teacher, but he let it go.
“So, do you have any questions, Naruto?” The Old Man asked in a serious tone, and the atmosphere in his office suddenly became heavy once more - but somehow even worse than before.
The boy nodded carefully, and said, “are you gonna tell me about my family and why I’m hated now, Old Man?”
The old Hokage said, “of course; I promised, did I not? But first things first: I wasn’t telling the whole truth when I said only the three of us were here.” Then, he made a gesture and someone appeared.
“It’s Kurenai-sensei?!” Naruto said (shouted), very loudly, pleasantly surprised to see his former tutor on such an occasion. “Ehehe. Sorry,” he said afterwards, apologizing for not using his ‘inside voice’.
The woman smiled and greeted Naruto, unfazed by his loudness and refraining from scolding him, for once. “I was told by Hokage-sama to help explain some things,” she said.
“This isn’t about the sex talk again, is it?” Naruto asked, faking exasperation.
Iruka slapped Naruto upside the head, making his own head bigger with a certain jutsu. He said, “you MORON! What do you think you’re saying? Hmmm, of course, if you lack some information about the facts of life, I could always give you one of my infamous lectures. Well, I’ll go ahead and clear my schedule for seven hours-”
“Noooo!” Naruto shouted, “anything but that, Iruka-sensei!”
After a rather comical scene, with Naruto flailing his hands in panic, they went back to business.
“So, Naruto. That piece of information; it’s protected as an S-rank secret,” Kurenai said, “it has been for over a decade.”
Naruto listened attentively. Seeing that he wasn’t going to interrupt her, she continued, saying, “do you remember what the history books say about the fight between the Yondaime and the Nine-Tails?”
The boy hummed in affirmative, dreading what might come next.
Kurenai spoke of the need to seal Tailed Beasts to defeat them, of Jinchuuriki, and told Naruto the fate of the Kyuubi, twelve years before.
Naruto had a lot of questions in his mind, but one came out of his mouth first: “Why was I chosen?” He asked.
Kurenai looked Naruto in the eyes and said, “your mother was known to have Uzumaki ancestry; the Uzumaki clan had a special kind of Chakra, more potent and plentiful than most, thus especially good for containing Bijuu. One can tell if a person has inherited the Uzumaki Chakra and vitality in full by the color of that person’s Chakra - true Uzumaki had bright yellow or sometimes green-colored Chakra.
>>Another reason you were chosen was because you had been born that day; the younger a person is, the better they can adapt to Bijuu Chakra. It has been speculated that because of the presence of the Kyuubi, the pregnancy of your mother did not last nine months, as is usual. You were born as soon as it appeared.”
“So,” Naruto asked, “because I’m an Uzumaki and was born prema- prima- prematurely, or whatever that’s called, I was saddled with a giant fox?”
The Sandaime and Kurenai looked at each other, worried. “Yes, that’s the gist of it,” the woman said.
Naruto couldn’t help it; he laughed. He laughed long and hard, with more than a touch of hysteria. Kurenai put a hand on his shoulder in comfort, but the boy didn’t acknowledge it in any way.
After a minute of hysterical laughter, Naruto stopped and wiped his eyes of tears. He said, “sorry about that. Just appreciating the irony. The Old Man always said I wasn’t hated because of who my parents were, but that’s technically wrong- I mean, false. I thought I’d be happy to find out about my mother; now, I’m not sure.”
The other people present did not have an answer to that.
“So,” Naruto said, breaking the silence, “does that mean those who called me a monster behind my back were right?”
Kurenai looked at him sternly. She said, “I’ve taught you Fuuinjutsu myself. You know fully well that that doesn’t make you a monster.”
After a few reassurances from the other males present, especially Iruka, things went like this:
“Wait, Iruka-sensei. Didn’t the fox kill your parents?” Naruto asked, puzzled and worried.
“It did,” the older male replied, “don’t worry, that won’t be a problem. I don’t hate you, Naruto.”
“You did at first, though,” Naruto said, showing that he was a lot more perceptive than he seemed to be.
Iruka nodded in admittance. He said, “I did. It took me a while to come to terms with your status as the container, and even longer to speak to you without awkwardness getting in the way. But you already knew that, didn’t you?” Iruka said, ruffling Naruto’s hair, “you’re much smarter than people give you credit for. You’re truly… one of my excellent students. Even if you get distracted too easily.”
Naruto was truly touched. Of course, he hid it behind indignation. He said, “way to ruin the moment, Iruka-sensei. For the record, your lectures are too boring.”
“You little brat,” Iruka said, “it seems I shouldn’t buy you ramen at Ichiraku’s, after all,” hiding a smirk.
Naruto started pleading with his Academy teacher, but soon noticed the smirk, and pouted at Iruka -though he would deny it was a pout, without a doubt-, saying, “that was cruel, Iruka-sensei.”
Kurenai and the Third had wide smiles on their faces.
The moment was interrupted by, of all people, Konohamaru. “Old Geezer!” The boy shouted, “I heard both Naruto-niichan and Kurenai-sensei were around- oh, hi, Kurenai-sensei!” Though as soon as he saw his tutor’s expression, he shrank in fear.
“Konohamaru,” Kurenai said, “what have I told you about barging into the Hokage’s office -or anyone’s office or room- without knocking, much less shouting at the same time?”
“Uhhh. Not to?” Konohamaru said, still a bit scared.
“Yes,” Kurenai said in reply, then followed with, “tell me, Honorable Grandson, what did you just do?”
The young boy shrank into himself more; she only called him that when she was angry. He said, “sorry. I’m sorry, Kurenai-sensei! I was too enthusiastic to remember my manners.”
“Okay, forgiven,” the female tutor said calmly, showing an impressive turn of emotions.
All males present, even the Sandaime, thought that they would never understand women.
“Oh, Naruto-niichan,” Konohamaru said, “do you have time to play ninja?”
Naruto thought back to the information he had gotten on his mother, and decided he wanted more. He said, “sorry Konohamaru - we still haven’t finished our conversation. You know, between adults -ttebayo,” showing off his brand new forehead protector, though it was around his neck, green goggles still tied at forehead height.
Konohamaru was a bit disappointed, but he mainly marveled at his older brother figure being ‘a real ninja’, as the brown-haired Academy student put it.
After the young boy left (along with Iruka, who cited the need to keep an eye on said troublemaker), Naruto was told about his mother by Kurenai (who had been taught how to turn her Chakra into its Yin Release equivalent by the woman, though she wasn’t her Jounin sensei) and the Sandaime, though the latter didn’t know her quite as well.
So, Naruto found out about Uzumaki Kushina, also known as the Red Hot-Blooded Habanero and a few other aliases.*
-----
Iruka was announcing the teams. Everyone was paying attention, even Naruto. (Except Shikamaru, most likely.)
“Teams Three, Six, Nine, Eleven and a few higher numbers are still active and Genin, so….”
The young Chuunin rattled off a few teams, and voices of both happiness and disappointment sounded off. Then, he reached the number seven.
“Team Seven,” Iruka said, “is comprised of Haruno Sakura, Uzumaki Naruto and Uchiha Sasuke.”
Sakura threw a triumphant look at Ino, who frowned a bit, but said nothing. Naruto had mixed feelings on both his teammates, so he simply stayed quiet (and doesn’t that sound like an oxymoron).
Iruka proceeded onto Team Eight, which had Hinata, Shino and Kiba. The blue-haired girl threw a quick, slightly disappointed look at Naruto, but then, she took charge and, without speaking, forced Kiba to sit next to Shino along with her.
Team Ten had Ino, Shikamaru and Chouji. Shikamaru lifted his head and hand a bit to show Chouji a raised thumb. Ino sighed a bit in resignation; she seemed to have expected the outcome.
After a final, shorter lecture by Iruka, the new Genin were told to wait for their teachers in the classroom. The first one there was Kurenai, who had been hidden under a simple Cloak of Disguise, staying undetected by all. When she said she was there for Team Eight, Naruto slumped down in disappointment.
The woman gave a (very short) lecture on awareness to all the Genin present, making more than one kunoichi look at her in awe after her display of Jounin-level stealth, since even Iruka (who immediately left with his head down) had been surprised by the woman’s sudden appearance, though at least, he had drawn a weapon.
Team Ten was also headed by a kunoichi, this one over sixty years old, who introduced herself as Sarutobi Biwako. She had the kanji for ‘four’ on the shoulder of her dress, which she said was there because the Fourth Hokage saved her life at great cost to himself when asked.
Shikamaru privately thought that ‘Death(*2)’ described the fate of anyone who was made her student rather well. He never thought he would meet a woman more troublesome than his mother.
-----
After a long, long time waiting, Naruto decided to prank their new sensei. So, he put a chalkboard eraser above the door, honestly not in the mood to bother setting up something elaborate. Besides, you can’t beat the classics.
Sasuke called Naruto a fool, telling him not to bother using traps against a Jounin. The blond boy shrugged, while Sakura looked at the setup in thinly veiled interest.
The sound of a throat clearing tipped them off to someone present in front of an open window, on the inside. The man was tall and a bit thin, with hair of a shade that reminded Naruto of Mizuki and a single uncovered eye.
The man took in the kunai all three had drawn, and closed his eye, crinkling his visible face in what the three new Genin could somehow tell was a smile. “Well,” he said, “it seems I could grow to like you guys, if we don’t part ways immediately. Though the fact you didn’t detect me for over three hours is a serious negative - it’s not like I bothered to hide besides being outside behind a half-closed window.”
Sasuke and even Naruto were silent and vigilant still, so Sakura took initiative. She said, “are you our sensei? And what do you mean by ‘parting ways immediately’?”
“Aah,” the man said, “I’m Team Seven’s sensei, Hatake Kakashi. As for the other part of your question - the Jounin have the right to reject any prospective student that didn’t pass the test given. So, yes, there is a test you have yet to pass; if you ever do,” chuckling under his breath just loud enough to be heard when he said the last part.
Naruto was still looking at the man in suspicion, though he had lowered (not sheathed) his kunai. Sasuke, on the other hand, was cool as a cucumber once more, even if an undercurrent of fear, then determination didn’t escape Kakashi’s gaze. Sakura whispered: “the Academy test is just to weed out those who are completely inept,” making Naruto glare at her, turning her expression sheepish.
Sasuke was watching the interactions with well-hidden interest - well-hidden for a Genin, that is. So the kid took after his clan’s most-signed contract more than his Academy teachers let on; and even if curiosity killed the cat, in this case, it could only spell positive things - especially since it showed he didn’t look down upon his current teammates as much as expected.
“Well,” Kakashi said out loud, “you have interesting dynamics, I’ll give you that much. Now, you are going to meet me in Training Ground Three in twenty minutes.
>>Don’t be late; I certainly won’t be…,” laughing sinisterly after the last part and leaving with a swirl of leaves.
“Okay,” Naruto said, “time to go!”
Sakura, on the other hand, halted both of the boys by grabbing their collars and knocking their heads together, much to their protest. After they got over the dizziness, of course.
“Hey, what’s the big idea!?” Naruto said, rubbing his forehead.
Sasuke simply glared at Sakura venomously, though she had his attention.
The sole female of Team Seven said, “we’ve got to stick together - have you forgotten how important teamwork is supposed to be for Konoha shinobi?”
Sasuke snorted. He said, “why should we listen to you?”
Sakura could see that Naruto agreed with Sasuke, even if he didn’t say anything. Ignoring the hurt, she said, “would the other agree to anything, if one of you two called the shots?”
After the message sank in, Sasuke said, “what would you have us do?” Showing his acceptance of Sakura’s (temporary?) leadership.
The young kunoichi told them they should ask where Training Ground Three was, then run like they were being chased by snake summons; but stick together, regardless.
At Naruto’s suggestion, they headed for the Hokage’s office, by far the nearest place that had any shinobi, mainly because the Academy was technically closed that day.
-----
“Hey, Old Man,” Naruto said, happy as ever.
Both Sasuke and Sakura were wide-eyed (the latter more visibly than the former), and Sakura barely managed to keep from scolding her teammate, now believing his claims that he knew the village leader personally.
Sarutobi greeted his surrogate grandson, smiling behind the pipe he was smoking. After Naruto explained what he wanted, the old man said, “that’s all well and good, Naruto, but I’ve already told you that after you graduated, you would have to trade favors - like most shinobi do.”
“Huh, you did?” Naruto said. Then, it clicked. He said, “oh, when you got me Kurenai-sensei as a tutor. Now I remember. Still, it’s something we could learn from any shinobi, right?”
Sarutobi said, “well reasoned, Naruto, but the missions office is closed right now - nobody is around and, knowing Kakashi, you’re on a time limit. So, what will it be?” Smiling serenely.
Naruto nodded resignedly and said, “fine; name your terms, Old Man.”
After the terms had been agreed to, the three Genin-to-be set out for Training Ground Three… running like crazy.
-----
The training ground was practically on the opposite side of the village as compared to the Academy, so the three young shinobi candidates arrived panting; they had wasted too much time with the information gathering.
The two non-blond Genin did not protest, though, because they knew that the Hokage himself WAS the fastest way to get the info, because only ANBU were around on team assignment day after the teachers left and ANBU were too reluctant to speak at all, granted they were even visible.
-----
“Ah! We ma- we made it,” Naruto said, slightly out of breath.
“Not quite,” a voice said behind them, making Naruto start and open his kunai pouch and the other two shiver (unfortunately for them, they were too out of breath by the frantic sprint to react more).
“Sensei,” Naruto said, worried that they would fail, “what was our time?” No trace of fatigue in his voice.
Kakashi shook his head. He said, “it took you twenty minutes and thirty-six seconds. Too bad,” closing his eye, smiling in his own way. ‘They arrived and gathered information together,’ the man thought, ‘first test, check.’
After the three Genin-to-be squirmed a bit (he didn’t even answer their questions on whether they failed), Kakashi opened his eye and said, all business, “that said, I can tell at least one of you is somewhat promising, so you will get a second chance; but it will be even harder: you have to steal certain items - from me.”
After that, the Genin were presented with two bells and told to go at him with the intent to kill. Kakashi also told them, “I’m not a Chuunin or a rookie Jounin. Go nuts.”
Sasuke looked at the man thoughtfully. He said, “Kakashi. Is there a particular reason there are only two bells?”
Kakashi nodded. He said, “of course. Many Jounin are not willing to take on a full team, though they usually take a single apprentice. That said, nobody in the past has gotten even one bell from me, so I wouldn’t even count on one of you becoming my apprentice. Well, if that’s all…,” setting an alarm clock for an hour later.
Naruto and Sasuke looked at each other; while they did not exactly like one another and weren’t friends, the two of them made an excellent team, able to use silent communication without even making hand signs.
After the Jounin said ‘start’, Naruto grabbed Sakura by the back of the collar, and headed for a relatively safe location; said girl was too smart to struggle, but the low growl-like noises that came out of her throat told him there’d be hell to pay later.
“Don’t look at me like that, Sakura,” the blond preteen said, “fair is fair.”
Sakura’s glare barely abated, even when Sasuke smirked at her - she simply turned her glare towards her crush without hesitation.
Naruto cleared his throat. He said, “on to serious matters - what did you want to say, Sasuke?”
Sasuke said, “there is something fish- dodge!”
Without questioning their teammate, Naruto and Sakura immediately vacated their locations, just in time for Kakashi and another Kakashi to attack them. “Huh,” the man said, “you guys are way too slow to hide. Are you going to confront me head-on?”
Sasuke made the hand signs for “stick together” and “regroup”. Naruto was a sensor of passable skill, so he would leave it to the other two to find him, drawing Kakashi’s attention on himself.
Sasuke didn’t react to Kakashi’s taunts; by the time one of the copies decided to follow the other two, Sasuke had finished his three hand-seals (Boar, Horse and Tiger).
-----
‘What the hell?’ Clone-Kakashi thought, ’a Genin managed to shorten a C-rank elemental jutsu’s hand seals? He might not even have Fire affinity, according to Umino Iruka!’
The other clone was consumed in the conflagration, but he used Kawarimi (Body Replacement) without seals to get away, then burrowed underground, managing to blindside Sasuke and bury him… only to get a seal-less stream of fire in the face and dispel while gloating.
-----
Sasuke coughed a bit and frowned at the pain of a burned mouth; he hadn’t yet learned to use the raw element very well. Several other Uchiha had managed that without any backlash by the time they were his age; he could barely melt a rock in his hand. ‘Well, at least I didn’t completely exhaust my Chakra,’ he thought, wishing that he could use Earth Release. Hopefully he hadn’t overestimated the other two - he believed they’d find and free him.
Sasuke’s breathing became faster; not because of claustrophobia, he didn’t suffer from such a thing. He simply remembered the last time he put his faith into someone else. Still, he controlled his breathing, pushed away the flashbacks (I won’t let That Man win! I will find somebody to trust, like Mom said!) and listened for the sounds of battle.
-----
‘Huh,’ Kakashi thought, ‘so Naruto IS a budding sensor, after all. Not a very good one, but now that he’s on his guard, he can avoid me as long as I don’t put in any effort in hiding.’
Still, the two Genin were not just avoiding him, they were closing in on Sasuke slowly but steadily. The man decided to increase the pressure.
-----
“Sakura!” Naruto said urgently, “our sensei is on the move again, this time faster! Make a dash for Sasuke; we have to split up this time!”
Sakura had resigned herself to following Naruto’s commands; he was a good tactician, better at thinking on his feet than her and Sasuke and more cunning than most gave him credit for.
The both of them made a run for it, only to be stopped by a mudslide.
“Are you guys going somewhere?” Kakashi asked, rhetorically.
After a brief battle between the three of them, a thirsty Sakura had to disengage from her taijutsu match with Kakashi, in which she went so far beyond her limits it was almost funny; she even used Yang Release to strengthen her body. Despite Naruto’s Genjutsu helping her, Kakashi was still an insurmountable obstacle. Fortunately, Naruto had a plan B.
Both twelve-year-olds threw smoke bombs, though a Wind ninjutsu on Kakashi’s part put an end to that. The man dispelled a genjutsu, then realized there was a second one. ‘Both of them can use Genjutsu proficiently, and the second illusion’s Chakra was too different for me to detect immediately.’
By the time he broke out, Naruto was long gone, but Sakura was still rather close. ‘Hmm,’ Kakashi thought, ‘is he leaving her behind because of no teamwork, or is their teamwork even better than I thought, and they’re going for a three-on-one?’ Out loud, he said, “so, Naruto left you behind. So much for friendship, huh?”
Clone-Sakura and the real one stopped. The former shook her head. ‘She’ said, “there is a reason for everything we have done thus far, Kakashi-sensei, as there is for everything you’ve done, I imagine.
Kakashi smiled. He said, “that’s all well and good, Sakura-chan, but do you really think you can disguise a simple clone and throw your voice so well that I’d be fooled? Then again, you ARE stalling for Naruto and Sasuke to come help you.”
The real Sakura didn’t flinch at the first revelation, but when he mentioned Naruto and Sasuke’s presumed parts in the plan, Sakura suddenly gasped, too imperceptibly for anyone but him and others with nin-animal-level senses to hear. The girl stopped hiding behind a tree and confronted her sensei directly.
Sakura said, “so I can’t avoid fighting you, huh?” Resigned to her fate, but still willing to fight, despite her thirst and fatigue.
“On the contrary,” Kakashi said, “I’ll just wait here. As long as you don’t try to go to your teammates and wait for them here, I will just chill,” getting an orange book out of his pouch, though he realized Sakura expected a weapon.
Now that he realized that Sakura (probably) hadn’t been abandoned, Kakashi would simply wait to see whether her teammates would come and get her. The man had suppressed his Chakra to the best of his ability (which meant very, very well) from the moment he realized what the team’s plan might be, to see if the boys’d go for his clone (which wasn’t hidden) or Sakura, who was supposedly alone.
The fact that he subconsciously thought of them as a team was a really good sign for their prospects, he mused. His concentration, though, was broken by the girl of the team.
Sakura said, “sensei, is this Icha Icha?”
The man responded with a, “hmm?”
The girl shook her head. She said, “your taste in smut is horrible, Kakashi-sensei,” shaking her head.
‘Does she mean she usually reads better smut?’ Kakashi thought, but knew better than to voice that out loud. So, he just giggled, allegedly at something in the book.
‘He’s probably doing this on purpose,’ Sakura thought, ‘I didn’t see him turn a page all this time.’ Her dry mouth kept her from commenting any further. Still, Sakura’s fists tightened in anger.
-----
Just after Naruto and Sasuke came back and prepared to fight Kakashi alongside Sakura, the alarm clock sounded off. Kakashi chuckled, while the rookie Genin hung their heads.
-----
Naruto had been tied to a post (for being the only one not to have a prolonged or successful fight against Kakashi), with the other Genin being left with a bottle of water each and getting the very stern warning not to give Naruto any. The three preteens were very thirsty, even the usually more durable Uzumaki, mostly due to Kakashi’s cunning.
Sasuke and Sakura drank a lot of water, but when they saw Naruto’s condition, the two of them stopped drinking. Then, Sasuke said, “do you sense Kakashi anywhere around here, Naruto?” When the blond boy answered in the negative, Sasuke offered him the bottle.
“Good point,” murmured Sakura, realizing that a weakened squad member would slow them down. “But wait,” she said, “why don’t why just cut Naruto free, then he gets our bottles himself? We technically won’t be breaking any of sensei’s orders.”
Sasuke nearly palmed his face for not thinking of that answer. After the team had all sated their thirst -with a bit of a speed bump- (“Sakura, wouldn’t that be an indirect kiss?” “Shut up and drink, Naruto, shannaro.”), Kakashi appeared… and nonchalantly threw the bells in front of his team.
Naruto scrunched up his face. He said, “Kakashi-sensei, why are you giving us the bells?”
“Consider it a reward for finding a loophole in my words. Seeing underneath the underneath, as it were,” Kakashi said. Then, he finished with, “besides, I’d like to see you squirm. Now, you will have to choose who goes back to the Academy yourselves; consider it practice for when you’re team leaders. If you are able to progress beyond today, that is,” chuckling again.
“Now, I get it,” Naruto said, grinning, “you never told us you wanted an apprentice and not a team, only what other Jounin prefer; that’s what had Sasuke so suspicious. At first, I thought you wanted to kick me out of the team, but… it’s teamwork, isn’t it? That’s what this test is about to begin with.”
Kakashi narrowed his visible eye and said, “does that mean you’re going to risk everything on your conclusion and give the others the bells?”
Naruto was about to reply, when Sasuke put a hand on his shoulder. The dark-haired boy said, “wait, Naruto. This should be a team decision.”
After a few seconds, Naruto nodded. After a few words traded between the three of them, they came to a decision. “We’re in agreement,” the blond boy said, “either we pass as a team, or we go back to the Academy as a team.”
“I see,” Kakashi said, “then, the answer is obvious: you all pass.”
The three Genin were speechless. Even though they had already figured out the answer, they couldn’t quite believe they had passed. Their teacher motioned for them to follow him. Less than a minute later, they arrived at the memorial stone.
Kakashi said, “this here is a stone for heroes; nearly all of my friends’ names are on it.”
The Genin kept silent, even Naruto being able to read the somber atmosphere.
Kakashi resumed his speech. He said, “it’s for those who died in the line of duty. I didn’t have good teamwork with my team as a Genin, even if we stayed together after promotion; I was a little prick then, so it was mostly my fault. Our horrible communication issues and clashing personalities led to my teammates both dying.
>>It’s said that those who abandon the mission are the trash of the ninja world. But, in the wise words of my late teammate, those who abandon their comrades are below trash.” Then, he looked at them, still solemn, saying, “don’t make the same mistakes I did.”
After a few minutes of silence, someone talked. “Kakashi-sensei,” Sakura asked, “what were your teammates’ names?”
“I’ll tell you kids another time,” Kakashi said, “I’ve had enough excitement for one day. Still, I have to admit that the teamwork you three displayed is far above anything my team had, even into our Chuunin years. Well, I wouldn’t have passed you otherwise.
>>By the way… you did reach the Training Ground in time, I simply lied.”
His students’ cries were music to Kakashi’s ears.
-----
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*Not Red Death! That’s up there with Kakashi/Itachi of the Sharingan in creativity, and worse in terms of being bad fanon.
*2 Four (Shi, or Yon) and Death (Shi) are homophones.
-Sorry about making Team Seven so good about teamwork, but they had to be; otherwise, this fic’s Kakashi would fail them come hell or high water. Besides, the test had a lot more nuances than the canon one, while not changing the spirit of it at all; I’m keeping with the theme of making things harder for this Naruto.