Akamatsuverse Contract Labor
- Thread starter GreydonCreed
- Start date
No. Hell no. You've done too many flashbacks already. Just let the story flow for a bit before you try and stuff more in.
Also, it's Christmas cake, not strawberry cake. They're called Christmas cakes because:
A.) It's past the age of twenty five, i.e. the 25th of December.
B.) Once Christmas is over, there isn't much use for Christmas cakes. They're just stale leftovers. That's the connotation to the name. A woman who is a Christmas cake is past her metaphorical eat-by date. She's stale. Left over.
Which is absurd, really. It's like they have no concept of the MILF. Silly Japanese. That's what happens when you obsess over schoolgirls.
Also, I'm seriously hoping that you milk this for all the drama that it's worth. Keitaro gets angry, Keitaro plans, Keitaro gets depressed. Maybe he breaks things off with them, or asks to take a break and step back, Kanoko finds out but not in the way Keitaro planned, ect, ect.
I don't think Hina is evil, but she's definitely playing God and being extremely flippant about it. I seriously doubt she's even considered how it might affect Keitaro, to make that sort of offer, and she really needs to have her comeuppance somehow.
Also, it's Christmas cake, not strawberry cake. They're called Christmas cakes because:
A.) It's past the age of twenty five, i.e. the 25th of December.
B.) Once Christmas is over, there isn't much use for Christmas cakes. They're just stale leftovers. That's the connotation to the name. A woman who is a Christmas cake is past her metaphorical eat-by date. She's stale. Left over.
Which is absurd, really. It's like they have no concept of the MILF. Silly Japanese. That's what happens when you obsess over schoolgirls.
Also, I'm seriously hoping that you milk this for all the drama that it's worth. Keitaro gets angry, Keitaro plans, Keitaro gets depressed. Maybe he breaks things off with them, or asks to take a break and step back, Kanoko finds out but not in the way Keitaro planned, ect, ect.
I don't think Hina is evil, but she's definitely playing God and being extremely flippant about it. I seriously doubt she's even considered how it might affect Keitaro, to make that sort of offer, and she really needs to have her comeuppance somehow.
They do have the concept of MILF down... there's plenty of MILFs in anime, manga and doujin, it's just not as popular as lolis, teens, barely legal girls.
I think the term you may be looking for LR is Cougar.
Older women dating younger men, may not necessarily have been previously married, nor have had children, typically economically independent/rich, acting as a sugar mama to their boy toy(s).
Although neither Miyuki, nor Natsumi, would range in the Cougar category... Cougars tend to be more mature, ballpark in the 35+ age range.
I think the term you may be looking for LR is Cougar.
Older women dating younger men, may not necessarily have been previously married, nor have had children, typically economically independent/rich, acting as a sugar mama to their boy toy(s).
Although neither Miyuki, nor Natsumi, would range in the Cougar category... Cougars tend to be more mature, ballpark in the 35+ age range.
They also tend to be more voluptuous, and also hornier (female sex drive peaks around there).
[EDIT: That's actually the point of the concept. As I once heard it, "18 goes into 36 more than 36 goes into 18"]
So... Urd, maybe Misato... Can't really think of too many others. Plenty of manga where older women are attractive (the mom from PROJECT ARMS, the teachers from Psychic Academy and Negima, Eukanaria from Enchanter, Milfa from Beet the Vandel Buster, Tsuruko, Aoi from Dragon Eye), but most of the time they weren't into younger men.
Actually, Milfa would probably qualify, now that I think about it.
[EDIT: That's actually the point of the concept. As I once heard it, "18 goes into 36 more than 36 goes into 18"]
So... Urd, maybe Misato... Can't really think of too many others. Plenty of manga where older women are attractive (the mom from PROJECT ARMS, the teachers from Psychic Academy and Negima, Eukanaria from Enchanter, Milfa from Beet the Vandel Buster, Tsuruko, Aoi from Dragon Eye), but most of the time they weren't into younger men.
Actually, Milfa would probably qualify, now that I think about it.
Oni_kawaii said:
and this is why I keep family at arms length at the closest
and go 10 years without any real contact whenever possible.
not sure how it works in Romania but I take it that ignoring family honor is not an option
or sign a prenup and have a 72 hour marriage
and go 10 years without any real contact whenever possible.
not sure how it works in Romania but I take it that ignoring family honor is not an option
or sign a prenup and have a 72 hour marriage
Hmmm...
Martian successor nadesico, the scientist
The teacher from Mahoromatic (personally, I just class her as wacked out slut)
Would Ifurita from El Hazard OAV's count?
The older sister in Girls Bravo maybe
maybe Lisa Hayes from Robotech
Protodevilin from Macross 7
Queen Beryl in Sailor Moon
The girl with the book in Shakugan no Shana (name slippe my mind)
Technically Ayeka and Ryoko in Tenchi Muyo
I suppose Saber from Fate Stay Night would qualify on age
Martian successor nadesico, the scientist
The teacher from Mahoromatic (personally, I just class her as wacked out slut)
Would Ifurita from El Hazard OAV's count?
The older sister in Girls Bravo maybe
maybe Lisa Hayes from Robotech
Protodevilin from Macross 7
Queen Beryl in Sailor Moon
The girl with the book in Shakugan no Shana (name slippe my mind)
Technically Ayeka and Ryoko in Tenchi Muyo
I suppose Saber from Fate Stay Night would qualify on age
BukkakeNoJutsu said:
Oni_kawaii said:
and this is why I keep family at arms length at the closest
and go 10 years without any real contact whenever possible.
not sure how it works in Romania but I take it that ignoring family honor is not an option
or sign a prenup and have a 72 hour marriage
and go 10 years without any real contact whenever possible.
not sure how it works in Romania but I take it that ignoring family honor is not an option
or sign a prenup and have a 72 hour marriage
Ordo said:
BukkakeNoJutsu said:
Oni_kawaii said:
and this is why I keep family at arms length at the closest
and go 10 years without any real contact whenever possible.
not sure how it works in Romania but I take it that ignoring family honor is not an option
or sign a prenup and have a 72 hour marriage
and go 10 years without any real contact whenever possible.
not sure how it works in Romania but I take it that ignoring family honor is not an option
or sign a prenup and have a 72 hour marriage
and for those wondering me and the bride-to-be met over christmas and we get along excellently. it amazing what the old woman did and found a girl who like guns more then i do.
now im working on paperwork with the INS so there can be no hiccups when i return from deployment.
The preliminary second part of Ch 32. Enjoy! :lol:
Hinata-sou Dormatory
Early December
early evening
ôWe need to talk.ö
Four more scary words could not be thought of from any language. Having her older brother tell her that after dinner, with his aunt standing behind him and both of them with solemn looks on their faces, did not make it any better.
Kanako followed Keitaro and Haruka as they walked though the wooded glen behind the Sou. It was the same area where they had initially taken the seals off the Hina Honor Sword, and it was almost the same time of day. However, this time the three quarters moon was above their heads, and there was enough light for the three of them to walk between the trees with little trouble.
Reaching the clearing with the boulder that they had rested the sword case on, Keitaro stopped and turned to face Kanako. Haruka turned as well, standing shoulder to shoulder with her erstwhile cousin. The cold white moon light was illuminating both their faces, and Kanako could feel dread start to form around her heart. People did not go to this much trouble for to tell someone good news.
ôKanako-chan, there are some things I need to tell you. You are not going to be happy about any of it. I am not doing this with the intention of hurting you, but someone forced my hand.ö Keitaro had a serious look on his face as he spoke. He watched as his little sister completely focused on him, which made him more than a little nervous. He had spoken with Haruka earlier about his idea on how to break the news to Kanako about the police girls and GrannyÆs offer, and while she was willing to go along with KeitaroÆs plan, she also thought there was a fair chance of Kanako blowing up, which is why they were in the woods right now.
ôAs you suspected, I got romantically involved with someone in December of last year. What you probably didnÆt know was it was not just one girl. And no, I was not cheating on her, they both knew about each other.ö Keitaro said, seeing KanakoÆs eyes narrow and her fists clench.
ôThey both knew that I was leaving for Thailand in January for what was supposed to be a year long trip, so we all decided not to get too emotionally involved. We agreed that once I got back from the trip I would call them and see if we wanted to get back together again. Even though itÆs been three months since I got back home, I barely called them the other day.ö Here Keitaro paused to look at Kanako; while she was visibly angry, she did not look to be very much so.
ôThey were happy to hear from me, and they very much wanted to get back together again, so we met at a park.ö Keitaro was being very careful not to give either names or locations in anything that he was saying, since he did not want to give Kanako the means to backtrack to the girls. ôThey wanted to get back together with me, but they felt that they had to tell me something in order to keep things honest between us. Granny Hina had found out about us and went to talk to them.ö
ôWhat did she say?ö Given how emotional Kanako was, she sounded more gravelly than usual. Keitaro looked at her carefully before continuing.
ôShe did not have a problem with the girls being with me. In fact, she wanted to encourage it.ö Keitaro paused for a moment. ôShe told the girls that if they were to have my children, either as wives or concubines, they would receive the Urashima name and financial support, as long as we had partial custody.ö
At that moment both Keitaro and Haruka were almost blown off their feet as a massive ki release took place, dwarfing anything they had ever felt before with the exception of the Hina Demon Blade being drawn in anger. But instead of the cold feeling of anger they had previously experienced, the orange reddish glow starting to form around the motionless younger girl was the rarely experienced and greatly feared release of rage ki, which was as though they were standing in front an open furnace.
ôKanako! KANAKO!ö Keitaro shouted, trying to get closer to her, but not being able to do so. ôPlease, donÆt do this, Kana-chan!ö He was becoming afraid, both for his sister and for what could occur. He had heard stories about people becoming locked into a rage ki release, which was almost the same as going kill crazy or running amok, only with more destruction and death as a result. ôPlease, come back to me, I need you! YouÆre family, you will always be a part of my life!ö To his horror, the ki started to intensify for a few moments before to his shock and relief, it started to recede, steadily but surely dropping before the orange glow disappeared completely. When that happened Kanako dropped down to her knees, openly crying. Keitaro was next to her in a heartbeat, enveloping her in a hug.
ôIÆm sorry Kana, IÆm so sorry.ö Keitaro was not quite sure what he was apologizing for, all the knew was that his little sister was suffering because of him. He held her for a while, listening as her sobs dropped down to sniffles before she looked up at him, her eyes bloodshot and more than a little scary.
ôIÆm sorry too, Kei-kun.ö The male Urashima frowned as he looked at her.
ôSorry for what, Kana-chan?ö Keitaro was in no way prepared for her response.
ôFor this.ö Moving swiftly, Kanako kissed him fully, her tongue instantly invading his mouth. For a few moments Keitaro was too shocked to respond, before he tried to pull away with no great success as her arms were wrapped around his back. Just as an astounded Haruka was going to pull them apart, Kanako broke the kiss and pulled back and away, stumbling to her feet. Turning, she started to walk away.
ôWhere are you going, Kana-chan?ö The question came from Haruka, as Keitaro was still on his knees, his eyes wide as he looked at her.
ôI am not going to look for your girlfriends,ö the way Kanako pronounced the word was as though there was a foul taste in her mouth. ôI have to leave for a few hours, or else I could lose total control.ö The younger girl gave a significant look at the two others, and they immediately understood what she mean. ôDonÆt wait up for me.ö With that Kanako walked into the trees alone, heading toward the Sou. After a couple of minutes, the humming sounds of KanakoÆs motorcycle became apparent. Shaking off their paralysis, the two Urashima ran toward the house, only to see the glowing taillight on KanakoÆs motorcycle as she quickly drove away, her leather racer jacket and crash helmet visible over her jeans as she disappeared down the access road.
Looking at each other but saying nothing, Keitaro and Haruka slowly moved over to a two person bench in the back yard. The two collapsed onto the wrought iron seat, and just stared off toward the bright lights of Metro Tokyo.
Hinata-sou Dormatory
Early December
early evening
ôWe need to talk.ö
Four more scary words could not be thought of from any language. Having her older brother tell her that after dinner, with his aunt standing behind him and both of them with solemn looks on their faces, did not make it any better.
Kanako followed Keitaro and Haruka as they walked though the wooded glen behind the Sou. It was the same area where they had initially taken the seals off the Hina Honor Sword, and it was almost the same time of day. However, this time the three quarters moon was above their heads, and there was enough light for the three of them to walk between the trees with little trouble.
Reaching the clearing with the boulder that they had rested the sword case on, Keitaro stopped and turned to face Kanako. Haruka turned as well, standing shoulder to shoulder with her erstwhile cousin. The cold white moon light was illuminating both their faces, and Kanako could feel dread start to form around her heart. People did not go to this much trouble for to tell someone good news.
ôKanako-chan, there are some things I need to tell you. You are not going to be happy about any of it. I am not doing this with the intention of hurting you, but someone forced my hand.ö Keitaro had a serious look on his face as he spoke. He watched as his little sister completely focused on him, which made him more than a little nervous. He had spoken with Haruka earlier about his idea on how to break the news to Kanako about the police girls and GrannyÆs offer, and while she was willing to go along with KeitaroÆs plan, she also thought there was a fair chance of Kanako blowing up, which is why they were in the woods right now.
ôAs you suspected, I got romantically involved with someone in December of last year. What you probably didnÆt know was it was not just one girl. And no, I was not cheating on her, they both knew about each other.ö Keitaro said, seeing KanakoÆs eyes narrow and her fists clench.
ôThey both knew that I was leaving for Thailand in January for what was supposed to be a year long trip, so we all decided not to get too emotionally involved. We agreed that once I got back from the trip I would call them and see if we wanted to get back together again. Even though itÆs been three months since I got back home, I barely called them the other day.ö Here Keitaro paused to look at Kanako; while she was visibly angry, she did not look to be very much so.
ôThey were happy to hear from me, and they very much wanted to get back together again, so we met at a park.ö Keitaro was being very careful not to give either names or locations in anything that he was saying, since he did not want to give Kanako the means to backtrack to the girls. ôThey wanted to get back together with me, but they felt that they had to tell me something in order to keep things honest between us. Granny Hina had found out about us and went to talk to them.ö
ôWhat did she say?ö Given how emotional Kanako was, she sounded more gravelly than usual. Keitaro looked at her carefully before continuing.
ôShe did not have a problem with the girls being with me. In fact, she wanted to encourage it.ö Keitaro paused for a moment. ôShe told the girls that if they were to have my children, either as wives or concubines, they would receive the Urashima name and financial support, as long as we had partial custody.ö
At that moment both Keitaro and Haruka were almost blown off their feet as a massive ki release took place, dwarfing anything they had ever felt before with the exception of the Hina Demon Blade being drawn in anger. But instead of the cold feeling of anger they had previously experienced, the orange reddish glow starting to form around the motionless younger girl was the rarely experienced and greatly feared release of rage ki, which was as though they were standing in front an open furnace.
ôKanako! KANAKO!ö Keitaro shouted, trying to get closer to her, but not being able to do so. ôPlease, donÆt do this, Kana-chan!ö He was becoming afraid, both for his sister and for what could occur. He had heard stories about people becoming locked into a rage ki release, which was almost the same as going kill crazy or running amok, only with more destruction and death as a result. ôPlease, come back to me, I need you! YouÆre family, you will always be a part of my life!ö To his horror, the ki started to intensify for a few moments before to his shock and relief, it started to recede, steadily but surely dropping before the orange glow disappeared completely. When that happened Kanako dropped down to her knees, openly crying. Keitaro was next to her in a heartbeat, enveloping her in a hug.
ôIÆm sorry Kana, IÆm so sorry.ö Keitaro was not quite sure what he was apologizing for, all the knew was that his little sister was suffering because of him. He held her for a while, listening as her sobs dropped down to sniffles before she looked up at him, her eyes bloodshot and more than a little scary.
ôIÆm sorry too, Kei-kun.ö The male Urashima frowned as he looked at her.
ôSorry for what, Kana-chan?ö Keitaro was in no way prepared for her response.
ôFor this.ö Moving swiftly, Kanako kissed him fully, her tongue instantly invading his mouth. For a few moments Keitaro was too shocked to respond, before he tried to pull away with no great success as her arms were wrapped around his back. Just as an astounded Haruka was going to pull them apart, Kanako broke the kiss and pulled back and away, stumbling to her feet. Turning, she started to walk away.
ôWhere are you going, Kana-chan?ö The question came from Haruka, as Keitaro was still on his knees, his eyes wide as he looked at her.
ôI am not going to look for your girlfriends,ö the way Kanako pronounced the word was as though there was a foul taste in her mouth. ôI have to leave for a few hours, or else I could lose total control.ö The younger girl gave a significant look at the two others, and they immediately understood what she mean. ôDonÆt wait up for me.ö With that Kanako walked into the trees alone, heading toward the Sou. After a couple of minutes, the humming sounds of KanakoÆs motorcycle became apparent. Shaking off their paralysis, the two Urashima ran toward the house, only to see the glowing taillight on KanakoÆs motorcycle as she quickly drove away, her leather racer jacket and crash helmet visible over her jeans as she disappeared down the access road.
Looking at each other but saying nothing, Keitaro and Haruka slowly moved over to a two person bench in the back yard. The two collapsed onto the wrought iron seat, and just stared off toward the bright lights of Metro Tokyo.
You should probably look into refining some of that. The ki bits in particular came across as somewhat wankish. I'd recommend instead of going off on a side-track about how dangerous it is, you should instead work that into the description itself. The details need to be mentioned incidentally, not given their own side track. It breaks the flow, and makes it sound like you're more concerned about telling us about ki than documenting Kanoko's breakdown.
First of all, decide if we even need to know some of what you're lecturing us about.
Then, once you've discarded the stuff that's unnessary, work it into the description of the event, instead of giving it a sidebar. Example: "As she fell deeper into her emotions, her aura flared stronger and darker, flattening the grass around them and running from blood to crimson. Keitaro knew that if he didn't do something, she could be consumed by her emotions completely, and only violence would follow."
While you are describing to us what is visually happening and what the characters are doing and thinking, you can drop in details about the setting itself. We should learn about the world as a side-effect of reading your story, not break off in the middle of your story for a lecture on the setting.
First of all, decide if we even need to know some of what you're lecturing us about.
Then, once you've discarded the stuff that's unnessary, work it into the description of the event, instead of giving it a sidebar. Example: "As she fell deeper into her emotions, her aura flared stronger and darker, flattening the grass around them and running from blood to crimson. Keitaro knew that if he didn't do something, she could be consumed by her emotions completely, and only violence would follow."
While you are describing to us what is visually happening and what the characters are doing and thinking, you can drop in details about the setting itself. We should learn about the world as a side-effect of reading your story, not break off in the middle of your story for a lecture on the setting.
So you deliberately bring up and complain about your family in a public forum, and then get mad when someone bites and sides with you?
If you don't want to hear it, then don't whine about it and fish for asspats.
I already realize how badly I screwed up. I fed a passive-aggressive attention whore.
Shame on me.
If you don't want to hear it, then don't whine about it and fish for asspats.
I already realize how badly I screwed up. I fed a passive-aggressive attention whore.
Shame on me.
Here is the preliminary third part of Ch 32. BTW, I decided I will write a flashback scene where Granny makes her offer to Natsumi and Miyuki. That will go at the beginning of the chapter, which I hope to post in it's entirety tomorrow.
Enjoy! :lol:
Hinata-sou Dormatory
early the next morning
Keitaro stumbled slightly as he walked toward the kitchen. He had not slept well the night before, as he had waited in vain until after midnight for Kanako to return, then dozed fitfully in his room, listening for any sounds of her arrival. Kanako had apparently switched off her mobile phone when she left the night before, as calls went right to voice mail, so Keitaro just left a message asking her to call him back as soon as she could. Once the dawn arrived, he finally forced himself to get up and get ready for the rest of the day. He resolved that if he had not heard from his sister by the time breakfast was over, he was going to grab Haruka and go looking for her, even if it meant riding on the back of his auntÆs suicide machine. Given KanakoÆs mood the night before, he suspected that he and Haruka would only need to ride to the rising column of smoke and/or follow the conga line of police, ambulances and self-defense force troops to where she was.
Walking through the kitchen doorway, Keitaro came to a halt. Sitting at the table was Kanako, wearing only a black t-shirt and jeans, slumped forward with her elbows on the tabletop, a posture that was totally alien to the always poised girl. A mug of hot tea was held with both hands, and as the surprised manager watched, she noisily slurped the drink, simultaneously cooling and drinking the steaming hot beverage. Keitaro could remember Kanako doing the same thing as a child, when she was in a hurry to drink something, but this was something he had not seen her do since she became a young adult.
ôGood morning, Kei-kun.ö With a start, Keitaro realized that his sisterÆs dark eyes were fixed on him.
ôGood morning, Kanako-chan. How are you feeling this morning?ö It sounded like a silly thing to ask, but Keitaro had spent the entire night worrying about his younger sister.
ôA lot better, thank you.ö As a matter of fact, Kanako did look more calm and relaxed, with only the dark rings under her eyes to show that she had been up all night. That was unusual, as there times that she had not been able to sleep for three nights straight, and she did not look as visibly tired as she did now.
ôWhen did you come in? I didnÆt hear you arrive.ö Keitaro gingerly sat down across from his sister.
ôAbout half an hour ago. If I leave it in low gear, my bike is almost silent, and I did not want to wake everyone up.ö Kanako took another slurp of what Keitaro could now smell as green tea.
The silence that followed was not a comfortable one. Keitaro could not just come out and ask what Kanako thought about his girlfriend situation, and she was in no hurry to speak again. Just as Keitaro was opening his mouth to say something, say anything in fact, Shinobu walked into the kitchen.
ôOh! Good morning Kanako-san, sempai.ö The young resident gave a quick head bow.
ôGood morning Shinobu-chan.ö Keitaro returned the greeting, while Kanako gave a grumbling growl as she drank her tea that could charitably be called a response. The cook was not offended, as she was used to her fellow residents being non-verbal in the early morning before they had their beverage of choice.
ôWould you like for me to make you something to tide you over as I prepare breakfast?ö Shinobu asked as she pulled on an apron over her casual clothes. It was a testament to how much more self confident the young girl was that she did not panic and start babbling at finding the two Urashima in the kitchen.
ôIf you can pour me a mug of tea that will be fine, Shinobu-chan.ö Keitaro was not about to ask Shinobu to go out of her way when she already had work to do.
ôNot a problem, sempai.ö Filling a large mug with steaming hot water from a kettle, Shinobu quickly filled a tea strainer with loose green tea leaves and placed it in the mug before bringing it to the dorm manager. Hustling over to the breadbox, Shinobu loaded the toaster with bread slices before starting to pull various items from the refrigerator. ôSempai, do you mind if I turn on the radio?ö
ôNot at all.ö Shinobu had a transistor radio on the window still, which she used to listen to J-pop music as she worked. She reached over and turned it on, and as it was the top of the hour, there was a news report being given.
ôàAt the top of the news today are reports of a major fight between rival factions of a bosozuko motorcycle group in Tokyo early this morning. Still under investigation after arrests last year for kidnapping and sexual assault, the Rising Sun motorcycle club apparently started fighting amongst themselves, with most of the violence taking place at their clubhouse in the Ginza district. While no fatalities occurred, there were many severe and crippling injuries among the club members and their motorcycles were vandalized and destroyed. The police are investigating this latest incident as well, however due to the lack of cooperation from the club members, no arrests are forthcoming at this time.ö
Hearing his sister snort softly KeitaroÆs eyes flicked over toward her for a moment before he noticed something and took a longer look, or more specifically at her hands, which were still wrapped around the mug. Even though her hands were clean, there were what appeared to be fresh scabs and bruises across the first two knuckles of both hands. Keitaro was familiar with scabs on those parts of the hands; usually they came from when someone either did punching practice without hand wraps, or they were involved in a fistfight where they did not have hand protection.
Looking up at KanakoÆs face again, Keitaro saw that her eyes were once again focused on him, the expression in them both calm and unapologetic. Keitaro thought about what he suspected may have happened, who it happened to, and more importantly, how the person involved knew not to go too far. After a few moments, Keitaro stood and walked over to a kitchen drawer and pulled out a small first aid kit they kept there. Walking back, he sat down next to his sister and pulled out some disinfectant wipes. Taking one of her hands, he started to clean the injuries as best he could, Kanako not reacting to the sting of the antiseptic, before placing knuckle bandages on the wounds. Finally, he brought her bandaged hands up to his face, and gently kissed the bandages, a throwback to when Keitaro would treat her scrapes and cuts as a child and he would kiss it to make it feel better.
ôWhat are you going to do now, Kana-chan?ö Keitaro spoke in a low voice, and with the music now playing, Shinobu did not hear it.
ôFollow your lead. Watch your back. Same as always.ö The look in KanakoÆs eyes was softer now.
ôAnd what about the girls?ö Kanako knew that Keitaro was not referring to the residents of the Sou.
ôIÆm not going to be happy about it, but as long as they donÆt hurt you, I wonÆt hurt them.ö Keitaro knew this was as good as it was going to get at this time.
ôThat includes physically.ö Keitaro had to make sure.
ôIf you insist.ö After last night, Keitaro was justified in asking, so Kanako could not get offended for the question.
ôThank you.ö Keitaro kissed her hands again before releasing them, just in time for Shinobu to turn around with a plate full of buttered toast.
ôIs everything alright, sempai?ö She blinked at seeing the manager now sitting next to his sister and the first aid kit out. Noticing that KanakoÆs hands were now bandaged, Shinobu decided discretion was the better part of valor and did not say anything about it.
ôYeah, everythingÆs fine.ö Reaching over to grab his mug of tea, Keitaro took a slice of toast and smiled at the young cook. ôThank you for asking.ö Shinobu blushed in response, and turned back to work on the breakfast, leaving everyone to their thoughts.
Enjoy! :lol:
Hinata-sou Dormatory
early the next morning
Keitaro stumbled slightly as he walked toward the kitchen. He had not slept well the night before, as he had waited in vain until after midnight for Kanako to return, then dozed fitfully in his room, listening for any sounds of her arrival. Kanako had apparently switched off her mobile phone when she left the night before, as calls went right to voice mail, so Keitaro just left a message asking her to call him back as soon as she could. Once the dawn arrived, he finally forced himself to get up and get ready for the rest of the day. He resolved that if he had not heard from his sister by the time breakfast was over, he was going to grab Haruka and go looking for her, even if it meant riding on the back of his auntÆs suicide machine. Given KanakoÆs mood the night before, he suspected that he and Haruka would only need to ride to the rising column of smoke and/or follow the conga line of police, ambulances and self-defense force troops to where she was.
Walking through the kitchen doorway, Keitaro came to a halt. Sitting at the table was Kanako, wearing only a black t-shirt and jeans, slumped forward with her elbows on the tabletop, a posture that was totally alien to the always poised girl. A mug of hot tea was held with both hands, and as the surprised manager watched, she noisily slurped the drink, simultaneously cooling and drinking the steaming hot beverage. Keitaro could remember Kanako doing the same thing as a child, when she was in a hurry to drink something, but this was something he had not seen her do since she became a young adult.
ôGood morning, Kei-kun.ö With a start, Keitaro realized that his sisterÆs dark eyes were fixed on him.
ôGood morning, Kanako-chan. How are you feeling this morning?ö It sounded like a silly thing to ask, but Keitaro had spent the entire night worrying about his younger sister.
ôA lot better, thank you.ö As a matter of fact, Kanako did look more calm and relaxed, with only the dark rings under her eyes to show that she had been up all night. That was unusual, as there times that she had not been able to sleep for three nights straight, and she did not look as visibly tired as she did now.
ôWhen did you come in? I didnÆt hear you arrive.ö Keitaro gingerly sat down across from his sister.
ôAbout half an hour ago. If I leave it in low gear, my bike is almost silent, and I did not want to wake everyone up.ö Kanako took another slurp of what Keitaro could now smell as green tea.
The silence that followed was not a comfortable one. Keitaro could not just come out and ask what Kanako thought about his girlfriend situation, and she was in no hurry to speak again. Just as Keitaro was opening his mouth to say something, say anything in fact, Shinobu walked into the kitchen.
ôOh! Good morning Kanako-san, sempai.ö The young resident gave a quick head bow.
ôGood morning Shinobu-chan.ö Keitaro returned the greeting, while Kanako gave a grumbling growl as she drank her tea that could charitably be called a response. The cook was not offended, as she was used to her fellow residents being non-verbal in the early morning before they had their beverage of choice.
ôWould you like for me to make you something to tide you over as I prepare breakfast?ö Shinobu asked as she pulled on an apron over her casual clothes. It was a testament to how much more self confident the young girl was that she did not panic and start babbling at finding the two Urashima in the kitchen.
ôIf you can pour me a mug of tea that will be fine, Shinobu-chan.ö Keitaro was not about to ask Shinobu to go out of her way when she already had work to do.
ôNot a problem, sempai.ö Filling a large mug with steaming hot water from a kettle, Shinobu quickly filled a tea strainer with loose green tea leaves and placed it in the mug before bringing it to the dorm manager. Hustling over to the breadbox, Shinobu loaded the toaster with bread slices before starting to pull various items from the refrigerator. ôSempai, do you mind if I turn on the radio?ö
ôNot at all.ö Shinobu had a transistor radio on the window still, which she used to listen to J-pop music as she worked. She reached over and turned it on, and as it was the top of the hour, there was a news report being given.
ôàAt the top of the news today are reports of a major fight between rival factions of a bosozuko motorcycle group in Tokyo early this morning. Still under investigation after arrests last year for kidnapping and sexual assault, the Rising Sun motorcycle club apparently started fighting amongst themselves, with most of the violence taking place at their clubhouse in the Ginza district. While no fatalities occurred, there were many severe and crippling injuries among the club members and their motorcycles were vandalized and destroyed. The police are investigating this latest incident as well, however due to the lack of cooperation from the club members, no arrests are forthcoming at this time.ö
Hearing his sister snort softly KeitaroÆs eyes flicked over toward her for a moment before he noticed something and took a longer look, or more specifically at her hands, which were still wrapped around the mug. Even though her hands were clean, there were what appeared to be fresh scabs and bruises across the first two knuckles of both hands. Keitaro was familiar with scabs on those parts of the hands; usually they came from when someone either did punching practice without hand wraps, or they were involved in a fistfight where they did not have hand protection.
Looking up at KanakoÆs face again, Keitaro saw that her eyes were once again focused on him, the expression in them both calm and unapologetic. Keitaro thought about what he suspected may have happened, who it happened to, and more importantly, how the person involved knew not to go too far. After a few moments, Keitaro stood and walked over to a kitchen drawer and pulled out a small first aid kit they kept there. Walking back, he sat down next to his sister and pulled out some disinfectant wipes. Taking one of her hands, he started to clean the injuries as best he could, Kanako not reacting to the sting of the antiseptic, before placing knuckle bandages on the wounds. Finally, he brought her bandaged hands up to his face, and gently kissed the bandages, a throwback to when Keitaro would treat her scrapes and cuts as a child and he would kiss it to make it feel better.
ôWhat are you going to do now, Kana-chan?ö Keitaro spoke in a low voice, and with the music now playing, Shinobu did not hear it.
ôFollow your lead. Watch your back. Same as always.ö The look in KanakoÆs eyes was softer now.
ôAnd what about the girls?ö Kanako knew that Keitaro was not referring to the residents of the Sou.
ôIÆm not going to be happy about it, but as long as they donÆt hurt you, I wonÆt hurt them.ö Keitaro knew this was as good as it was going to get at this time.
ôThat includes physically.ö Keitaro had to make sure.
ôIf you insist.ö After last night, Keitaro was justified in asking, so Kanako could not get offended for the question.
ôThank you.ö Keitaro kissed her hands again before releasing them, just in time for Shinobu to turn around with a plate full of buttered toast.
ôIs everything alright, sempai?ö She blinked at seeing the manager now sitting next to his sister and the first aid kit out. Noticing that KanakoÆs hands were now bandaged, Shinobu decided discretion was the better part of valor and did not say anything about it.
ôYeah, everythingÆs fine.ö Reaching over to grab his mug of tea, Keitaro took a slice of toast and smiled at the young cook. ôThank you for asking.ö Shinobu blushed in response, and turned back to work on the breakfast, leaving everyone to their thoughts.
1) Darned near every martial arts trained female in the Love Hina canon series uses violence to deal with their anger i.e. Naru, Motoko, Haruka, Tsuruko, Kanako.
2) The bosozuko group that got the crap stomped out of them was the one that kidnapped her the year before. There were no fatalities, and no permanently crippling injuries.
3) This is a one-off for Kanako. Besides which, what is Keitaro supposed to do, tie his sister up and keep her in the basement? Turn her over to the police? He knows that once she gives her word (about his GFs) she will keep it, which is why he is letting this go.
and
4) This is fiction, darn it! ^_^
2) The bosozuko group that got the crap stomped out of them was the one that kidnapped her the year before. There were no fatalities, and no permanently crippling injuries.
3) This is a one-off for Kanako. Besides which, what is Keitaro supposed to do, tie his sister up and keep her in the basement? Turn her over to the police? He knows that once she gives her word (about his GFs) she will keep it, which is why he is letting this go.
and
4) This is fiction, darn it! ^_^
Seeing how Naru or Motoko would have just harassed and assaulted the first man that they saw? Yeah. I'd applaud that.
No, it isn't good anger management, and no, it wasn't the right thing to do, but at least she did it constructively. Beating the crap out of sex offenders and Yakuza thugs? Give me a minute while I dig out all of my pity.
Also, I stand by my previous review. You should really consider refining the ki bit before finalizing the chapter.
No, it isn't good anger management, and no, it wasn't the right thing to do, but at least she did it constructively. Beating the crap out of sex offenders and Yakuza thugs? Give me a minute while I dig out all of my pity.
Also, I stand by my previous review. You should really consider refining the ki bit before finalizing the chapter.