Naruto Crescendo

Zexe

New Member
#1
Crescendo
Chapter 1: Snake In The Grass

One could mistake this day as perfect or as close to the word as possible, and of course it seemed that way. With the bright yellow sun blazing overhead and the gentle breeze curling around every tree and object as it swept throughout the land. Two dark figures one short and the other quite a bit taller, stood hidden atop the trees from all but the most observant of ninja. The taller of the two gave a slight incline of the head and patted the other on the shoulder gently.

ôGo.ö The word spoken was more resembling to a hiss from a snake, than from any human.

The other grunted and leapt off the tree in a freefall, akin to a flash of lighting thundering towards the ground. Only to grab out towards at a branch at the last moment and swing using the momentum of the fall to somersault himself forwards.

And from above the man watched, golden serpentine eyes flashing darkly in the light as his shadowed form slowly melded into the trees. Ku ku ku, go Kimimaroàfailure is not an optionà

The boy ricocheted, bouncing from tree to tree as he used the branches above and around to give himself cover. One singular thought ran through his mind. Failure was NOT an option. He moulded more chakra to his feet in an attempt to slow down; when the leaves around him began to rustle louder than they were several moments agoàit wasnÆt the wind it seemed.

He tensed and back-flipped off one branch, landing on another several metres away as a hail of shuriken rained down from above him, narrowly missing his feet.

A single nin sprung forth from within the clearing ahead of him, closely followed by a woman and three-man unit of what he guessed were Konoha ANBU. The shinobi in the lead slid forward along a wide tree branch which gradually began to slant downwards under his weight, coming towards a sudden halt as his silver white hair swayed haphazardly in the breeze. Slowly, a pair of hands, his hands reached up towards the mask he wore and shifted it sideways so it lay upon the right side of his face. A forehead protector was oddly perched over one eye and he also wore a black mask that covered up to half of his face starting from his chin to the bridge of his nose. Behind him was a woman, with spiky purple hair tied into a high pony-tail. She seemingly had pupil-less brown eyes and wore a long brown trench coat, although within the trench coat from what he could see was clothing so scarce that even a simple piece of rope would have been far more modest. The others seemed to be just your generic ANBU each with assorted masks (A pig, a cow and goat respectively), dark brown cloaks, and with two of the three sporting katanas strapped across their backs.

ôYou are trespassing on Konoha land, state your businessàor face the consequences.ö One member of ANBU whispered; his voice was quite ominous, even with the pig mask he wore. Each member of the ANBU unit took this as an opportunity to reveal their hidden kunai as one by one they each fell into a fighting stance. But a single outstretched arm caused them to all halt in their tracks.

ôWell?ö The silver haired ninja beckoned, lazily, as he surveyed the forest around him. The boy wasnÆt much of a threat; in fact he looked no older than ten. His hair was a strange shade of grey and his eyes were a light green. Upon the centre of his forehead there were two crimson dots that rested parallel to each other. The meaning? The silver haired nin had no idea. But there were rumours he, Orochimaru, had returned. Caution was an even larger necessity.

ôUnless you are the third Hokage of Konoha, I have no time for you.ö The boy retorted quietly. Kakashi could see every twitch on the boyÆs body as he tensed up. What does he hope to achieve?

ôWe have no time to baby-sit! You have forfeited your lifeö Another ANBU snarled harshly as she returned her kunai from whence it came and began to slowly unsheathe her katana. ôGoodbye.ö As she was about to spring into action she was once again held back by the silver haired ninja. She span around quickly.

ôKakashi-taichou what are yo-?ö Her sentence was cut short as he interrupted her.

ôHeÆs of no threatàthe chances of him being able take of all us out are slim to none, letÆs just ask why he wants to talk to Hokage-sama.ö

She shrugged off his arm and stepped backwards, placing her katana back within its sheath. ôMy apologies.ö She mumbled chastised. The purple haired woman behind them in the brown trench coat sighed in frustration and disappeared in a poof of smoke. Reappearing directly in front of Kakashi grabbing a fistful of his vest.

ôI couldnÆt give a shit about what this little brat wants.ö She turned from Kakashi back towards the boy, a cruel smirk upon her face. ôJust tell me where Orochimaru is now and IÆll make your death a quick one.ö The glint of insanity flashed brightly from in her eyes; a snake or at least only its head protruded from within her sleeves, swaying its head slowly from side to side as if in a trance it began hissing loudly and dangerously in her antagonistÆs direction.

ôWho is thisàOrochimaru you speak of?ö The boy replied, a slight smirk upon his face.

ôDonÆt play dumb with me!ö She screeched. The sheer volume of her voice sending numerous startled birds into flight at the same time. Springing forward she caught the boy off-guard with a hard kick to the sternum, followed by another kick this time aimed for the side of his head with her opposite foot, whilst using the first kick for leverage. The multiple blows sent the boy flying several feet away. Letting out a small grunt of pain she placed a light palm upon her now stinging foot. What is he made ofàSteel? She wondered.

The boy righted himself in midair, grabbing and scratching for dear life onto the nearest tree with both hands, climbing upwards along the tree bark using his chakra to quickly escape from his crazed pursuer. The woman, her attention now back on the fight narrowed her eyes at his ploy.

ôI wonÆt let you escape! Senei Jashu (Hidden Shadow Snake Hands).ö Instead of the one snake from earlier, multiple snakes emerged from within her coat sleeve. Each with their own bizarre patterns and skin tones, together they stretched and reached into the treetop where the boy had disappeared into hissing together as one. The woman grinned sadistically and laughed; clenching her fist she pulled her arm back retracting the snakes and her target out from his hidden location simultaneously. ôGotcha.ö As the boy rocketed towards her she reared back her other arm ready to place a heavy blow upon her oncoming target, but faltered remembering the unpleasant sensation of pain that came the last time she attacked him physically. Instead she jumped off the branch she was standing upon and swung down her arm, slamming the boy harshly on ground several hundred feet below, the end result leaving him as an unceremonious heap on the floor. Sensing to further struggle from her opponent she relaxed her arm allowing the snakes to flow free from her sleeve and fully bind her opponent.

ôYanagi No Mai (Dance of the Willows).ö The word were spoken so softly, even with her acute hearing she struggling to hear them.

Instantly four white objects protruded out the snakes writhing coils, as they hissed in pain the snakes eased on their grip allowing the boy even more movement and the opportunity to break free.

ôWhatàis that?ö She wondered, out of the boyÆs sleeves and in some parts straight out of his clothes were his bones they seemed to have elongated to the point were the actually broke free from his skin. Wasting no time the boy dashed forward extending with his elbow. The woman dodged the first blow aimed for her midsection and the second aimed for her neck with practiced ease. Catching the third strike she pushed him downwards sending his bone protrusions straight into the soft, mushy ground. He responded by lashing out with his knee, which she caught with her other hand.

She cackled.

ôWeakling! You need t-,ö Her tirade was cut short as yet another bone protrusion burst forth, this time straight out from the boyÆs knee and straight through her palm. She could only watch shocked as her own blood splashed across her face. But soon enough her expression contorted into one of sadistic glee. ôWell now, that wasàunexpected.ö Her tongue darted out of her mouth, slowly licking the blood that landed there and around the edges of her pink lips. Then bringing her own knee upwards she struck him in the face and back flipped away releasing her hand with a short groan of pain.

With a perpetual smile she brought her hands together into one handseal and with a visible struggle rapidly went through several others. ôKanashibari no Jutsuö (Temporary Body Paralysis Technique.) The technique was successful. The boy was frozen in place. Grinning at his prone form she began a new sequence of seals. ôSuiton: Daibakufu no Jutsu.ö (Water Style: Grand Waterfall Technique). A few moments passed and a ring of water began to appear in front of her, abruptly it gathered into a large mass and flew towards the boy resembling a great waterfall.

The boy unable to dodge was swept away with the flow of water, colliding and ploughing through several trees. The woman ready to continue her assault began to move forwards but felt a tug on her wrist.

ôAnko! ThatÆs enough.ö Anko, as she was called wrenched her arm free turned around to glared straight into KakashiÆs one visible eye. ôYou asked Hokage-sama if you may join us on this mission, but donÆt forget you have to follow my orders.ö

ôYes Kakashi-sensei.ö Anko spat mockingly unconsciously rubbing her wounded palm. Kakashi only shrugged in response and walked past her, towards the unconscious boy.

ôI know Orochimaru used you, I know you gave him your all and he still tossed aside like yesterdays trash. But revenge isnÆt the only answer.ö He spoke, just loud enough for her to hear. Anko hissed at him and clenched her fists in a venomous rage. What the fuck does he know?

ôJust pickup the kid and let's return to Konoha.ö She all but snarled.

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A flash of orange.

That was followed by high-pitched manic laughter and the angry yells of the resident fruit-seller.

ôDAMN YOU! YOU EVER COME ROUND HERE AGAIN AND IÆLL KILL YOU!ö The slightly overweight man began picking up oranges, apples and all fruits alike and started hurling them at his golden haired oppressor.

ôYOU SHOULDNÆT SOLD ME THOSE ROTTEN APPLES IN THE FIRST PLACE THEN, SHOULD YA?ö The boy retorted, holding onto the various fruits hidden within his bright orange jacket for dear life. The boy sharply turned a corner, kicking up several dust clouds as he moved. CanÆt have ramen all the time. After taking a minute to check the coast was clear he slowed, gradually, reaching the familiar route that led him home.

ôNo place home eh?ö He pulled out his key and opened the dilapidated front door of his apartment. Not even after taking three steps he spotted his elderly next door neighbour leaving his own apartment. ôHi there Daiki-san!ö He burst out. The man in question stiffened slightly and inhaled deeply several times, clutching the handle of his door so tightly his knuckles began to turn white. Before turning around and completely ignoring his greeter by walking outside the front door.

The boy sighed morosely. Nothing new there, And continued walking towards the doorway that led to his own apartment. After opening the door and slamming it behind him he threw the fruits he had æacquiredÆ on his flattened couch in the corner, also unzipping his jacket he which he also threw on the couch. He was just about to lay down feeling strangely tired from todayÆs activities and sleep when someone began knocking softly on the door. The boy stiffened, the last time heÆd opened the door when someone had knocked had resulted in a hospital visit . Excuse me if IÆm not rushing to open it. The knocking repeated, slightly harder this time.

ôNaruto-kun?ö A wizened voice called. NarutoÆs face lit up like a star, immediately he jumped off the couch and in his haste accidentally knocked the fruit he stole over onto the floor. ôWoops, hold on. Just a sec!ö He yelled, quickly picking up the fruits and throwing them back on the couch. He heard a light chuckle outside the door, and he gave a small grin in response. HeÆs the only one who cares. His grin faltered for a moment but was soon back plastered to his face with twice the intensity. Practically bouncing to the door he almost ripped it off its hinges in his excitement.

ôOld man!ö In front of him was the Sandaime, smiling fondly down at NarutoÆs enthusiastic form.

ôHello Naruto-kun, what took you so long?ö The boy in question bashfully scratched his head.

ôSorry, just knocked over some stuff.ö The HokageÆs smile only widened as he heard NarutoÆs reasoning letting out another chuckle. ôAh, yes, cleaning after oneself is extremely necessary.ö Whatever he was about to say next was halted as he took a good look inside NarutoÆs apartment, coughing slightly he guided Naruto outside the door. ôCome lets go for walk, itÆs quite stuffy in here after all.ö

ôAh, the air is so lovely this time of month wouldnÆt you say Naruto?ö Sandaime murmured, adjusting his formal robes slightly.

ôYeah, yeah, itÆs such a wonderful time of the year.ö

The Sandaime frowned at NarutoÆs tone. ôIsàthere anything wrong Naruto-kun?ö

Naruto just placed his hands in his pockets and glared at the ground. Anything wrong? HA! No everythingÆs fine except for the fact everyone hates me for no reason and I canÆt go one week without being attacked. ôOld man, can I ask you something?ö

ôOf course.ö The old man shifted his hat slightly and looked back towards Naruto. ôWhat is it? Do you want me to increase your monthly stipend?ö Naruto looked shocked; jumping in front of the HokageÆs path he waved his hands rapidly in front of himself.

ôNO WAY! ThatÆs not it.ö He stared back down at the ground, kicking a pebble that lay at his feet. ôI already get enough from youàI just want to know why everyoneàhates me.ö It was more of a statement than a question, a statement the Sandaime tried to reassure as false no matter how much he knew it was pointless.

ôThey donÆt hate you.ö

ôOld man, as much as I like you, and as much as people would like to believe the opposite I ainÆt a moron.ö The wise leader sighed, frowning slightly as he looked anywhere but at Naruto. It is still too early for him to know of the burden he carries.

ôNaruto.ö He paused trying to think of the right words. I have faced countless opponents in battles of physical strength and otherwise, why is it so hard to talk to an eight year old boy? Maybe it was the fact that Naruto was like a second grandson, or maybe it was the fact that out of all the people he had met during his long life he felt as if he owed the most to the young Uzumaki. ôThere are tests in every personÆs life, these build oneÆs character determining if they are worth the gifts life will bring if you succeed.ö

Naruto scratched his head in confusion. ôHuh?ö The old man chuckled and ruffled NarutoÆs hair lovingly.

ôAnswer me this, do you have a dream?ö

ôA dream?ö

ôYes, it is my dream for Konoha to always have peace, for war to be a thing of the past.ö The Sandaime looked around; it seemed that their walk had led them towards the village gates. The sun was beginning to set, looking down once again towards Naruto he frowned. The perpetual grin that was always upon NarutoÆs face was absent, following his gaze he stared forwards at the distant horizon, which was slightly obscured by a row of mighty trees.

ôIàwant to find whereàI truly belong.ö The grin came back into full view as he laughed. ôTHATÆS MY DREAM!ö

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This is a fic I've been planning for a while now, and it's still obviously in it's rough stages so there's gonna be some messy grammar and it'll probably read a little awkward but I'd thought I post it here and get a little feedback.

There's a couple of questions I'd like to ask...

#Is Kimimaro too strong? (Granted Anko wasn't really trying)

#Is Naruto too smart for his age? (It's an AU and my Naruto is a little smarter and pays more attention to the world around him but even Canon Naruto knew everyone despised him)

Thanks.

1st post btw.
 

AbyssalDaemon

Well-Known Member
#2
Is Kimimaro too strong? (Granted Anko wasn't really trying)
Nope or at least I don't think so. You did a good job of showing that Anko's more powerful but that she kept screwing up do to her overconfidence. Though if you still feel antsy about it, you can always show a little more of the differences in the level of power between the two.

Is Naruto too smart for his age? (It's an AU and my Naruto is a little smarter and pays more attention to the world around him but even Canon Naruto knew everyone despised him)
Not really. In the manga (as long you don't think that crap post timeskip) Naruto was shown being fairly bright. He isn't prodigy or anything like that but he is a lot brighter then what tends to be shown in fannon. As long as Naruto isn't around 5 or 6 years old then isn't a problem with him acting like this.

You've shown part of the main difference between 'your' Naruto and cannon version. In cannon his dream was to become the Hokage so that the people would like him, which allows him to ignore the indifference or outright dislike of the people around because (in his mind) at some point as long he keeps working toward it Naruto will be able to become Hokage; while your version has him want to find where he truly belongs.

~~~~~~

Anyhow nice start. It'll be interesting to Naruto's dream changes how he interacts with everyone else, as well as just what Kimimaro doing.
 

Zexe

New Member
#3
Thanks to Abyssal Daemon for the feedback. (Where's the newbie love TFF? :huh.:)

Nope or at least I don't think so. You did a good job of showing that Anko's more powerful but that she kept screwing up do to her overconfidence. Though if you still feel antsy about it, you can always show a little more of the differences in the level of power between the two.
Well Kimimaro is supposed to be 11 at this point in time, three years younger than his manga version. The main reason he was able to even land a hit was due to the suprise attacks from his bloodline limit catching Anko off-guard.

Not really. In the manga (as long you don't think that crap post timeskip) Naruto was shown being fairly bright. He isn't prodigy or anything like that but he is a lot brighter then what tends to be shown in fannon. As long as Naruto isn't around 5 or 6 years old then isn't a problem with him acting like this.
Seeing as this fic is roughly three years before the start of the manga, Naruto is 10 years old. I want to my Naruto to be quite similar to Canon Naruto in some aspects (Immensely confident, A never-say-die attitude etc.) and not so different in personailities that he's just some dude wearing Naruto's skin.

Anyways I won't be using many things from Part 2 as I didn't like it very much. Somehow Naruto became dumber and even more single minded but some characters like Sasori (Badass btw) I'll keep in there.
 
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