Yeah, saw it over on 4chan first, I think, then cruised around on some news sites to actually confirm it as it sounded so incredibly stupid that it might just be true. Usually, I just shrug my sholders when somebody is RIP:ified on 4chan, but stung to death by a stingray? That sounded too incredibly stupid to have been made-up.
Too bad. I've always liked Steve, though I've also always been of the opinion that the man really shouldn't be allowed to be anywhere even remotely near animals while there's a tv-camera anywhere nearby.
Anyways, decided to share some old Steve parodies with ya'll...
***
This is from an e-mail I sent to Tatsuya Ishida of www.sinfest.net fame.
"Crikey, just look at that! Isn't it gorgeous? The north-american cartoonist
in it's nest, working hard on what is believed to be an important part in
their mating rituals. I'm gonna jump 'im and stick my thumb up 'is bum, to
see if it's a male or female. Ouff! It's a feisty little rascal and 'es
really pissed now! If he bites me, it's entirely my own fault, 'es just
defending hisself. Cor, Terr. He's trying to go into a deathroll, y'd better
c'mon over here and pile on him too. The north-american cartoonist is one of
natures most fierce creatures when cornered, see the characteristic s-shaped
strike position and the pencil he's trying to gouge out my eyes with? Very
typical of the spicies. You should never approach one of them when they're
crossed, they're deadly. Danger, danger, danger."
This is from a Batman Beyond fic that's been stalled for the last two or three years...
"This noctural creature, the Man-Bat, is a largely unknown creature of which
nothing much is know. It does appear to be bi-pedal, prey on those of a
criminal bent and it is highly territorial. It is a fierce little bugger and
it can be very, very agressive, as this footage shows." the exited voice
ranted on and Terry shook his head in disbelief, then turned the television
off.
"The Crocodile Stalker? Here in Gotham, to track down me? It's ridiculous,
I'm not an animal!" Terry exclaimed, throwing his hands up into the air.
"You'll have to be careful out there, Terry. You can't let him get too
close." Bruce cautioned him.
"He's an annoying entertainer, not a dangerous criminal." Terry protested.
"How is he supposed to track me down? He can't, it's impossible. Our paths
will never cross."
"One can always hope." Bruce grunted. "But be careful none the less, his is
one of the most highly rated shows on the air. He's got a budget larger then
most small countries and works for the largest network on the planet, don't
underestimate the resources he can access."
***
"There is the Man-Bat now, he's a real beaut, 'aint he? Just look at those
muscles. It's a young male, he looks healthy and oh, he has spotted us. He's
really pissed now." the very recognizable voice suddenly stated and Terry
was momentarily distracted, allowing one of the robbers to get in a lucky
punch with his crow-bar, throwing Terry to the ground with a grunt. Terry
swept out with his leg and downed his attacker, then leapt to his feet and
approached the other three, he didn't have time to pay heed to the reckless
entertainer right now.
"If you drop those things right now, I'll go easy on you and only put you in
hospital for a week or two at the most." Terry informed them, but to no
avail, all three charged him.
"Could this be a scuffle for territory or possibly even over a female? There
has been no known sightings of any female Man-Bats for quite some time,
could this be the last of the spicies? You will find out, on this weeks
exciting edition of The Crocodile Stalker!" the man in question ranted on as
Terry ducked underneath a clumsy swing and sent the attacker flying with a
powerful uppercut.
"Who *is* that guy?!" one of the robbers inquired in a semi-panicked voice,
glancing over at the Crocodile Stalker. "He gives me the creeps!" he added,
just before Terry sent him flying with a perfect roundhouse.
"Me too." Terry muttered under his breath over the com-link. He had fought
every sort of criminal imaginable, but this guy was a completely different
breed. He hadn't raised a finger against Terry as of yet, merely commented
upon what he saw, but that still managed to scare Terry more then many other
real enemies ever had.
+Don't let him get to you. Ignore him until you've got everyone, then leave
as quickly as you can. Don't give him any more information then he already
has.+ Bruce adviced from the cave.
This is an old post of mine from the Ex Libris Nocturnis World of Darkness forums.
I just got a mental image of a Ghouled and Blood Bonded Steve Irwing helping
to clear the sewers from crocs...
"She's a lil' ripper! Isn't she gorgeous?"
"Man, that's like a fucking gigantic crocodile!"
"Tish-tosh, mate. Look, I shouldn't be doing this, but I'm going to dive
down there an' grab her. Then I'm gonna shove my hand up 'er bum and see if
she's male or female. Danger, danger, danger..."
+splash+
"Man, you're fucking crazy!"
"Ohhh, she's really pissed now. But if I get bitten now, it's entirely my
own fault."
"Damned straight! Who the hell fed you your first draught of blood, a
freaking Malkavian?!"
"Oooohhhh, lookie at those shiny snappers. She could bite me in half without
even trying. Oh, now she's going into a death roll. You should never *ever*
try to do this, it's very dangerous."
"Of course I won't try to do that! I'm not the insane one!"
"Ooohh, are you rolling? Are you rolling? You're a naughty girl, yes, you're
a naughty girl! By Crikey, this ol' gal's a feisty one!"
"You've got your hand up her ass! Who wouldn't struggle a bit?!"
"Blimey! She bit me in the arm! But crocodiles, like the one here chewing
off me left arm are not evil, nasty, killing machines. They're simply
defending their territory!"
"That's it! I'm not working with you any longer! I'm gonna request that the
Prince pulls all Malkavian Ghouls off this mission!"
"She's being very naughty, but she's a real beaut! Call Teri over would you?
We're going to have to relocate this gal to Australia Zoo, where she won't
be in any danger."
"Where she won't... That's a fifteen meter long crocodile, man! She's not
the one in danger!"
"Aw, we're handled Australian Salties for years. This lil' girl isn't gonna
cause any problems! Are you, girl? Are you?"
This too is one of my old posts on ELN...
Aren't you people glad that Steve-oh got into the crocodile hunting
business? I can certainly think of *several* other career choices where I
wouldn't want to have anything at all to do with someone like him.
Imagine having him as a teacher in school..
"G'day, mates. Today we're going to learn how to operate dangerous heavy
machinery using just our teeth. We'll begin with the radial arm saw."
At traffic school.
"Well, Bruce and Sheila. Anyone can drive using the steering wheel. Lets try
steering by jumping on the hood of the moving car and kicking the front
tires as soon as I've glued the pedal to the metal."
Taxi driver.
"New in town, mate? Crikey, have you ever been in one of these beauties up
on two wheels on the freeway?"
Pilot.
"G'evenin', mates. This is Steve Irwing, your captain speaking. We've got a
bit of a storm forming up ahead and it looks like a real beaut. I wonder how
much lightening this old lady can take? No time like the present to find
out! Hold on, mates. We're goin' in for a bit of a tussle!"
