And a pair of rabbits.
A pair of bipedal, anthropomorphic, actually well dressed rabbits, one about a head shorter than the blonde in a long dress and the other seemed to be a young child in a red sundress, both with ears that reached the small of their backs. Naruto himself was dressed casually in black shorts, sandals and an orange t-shirt.
The rabbit-woman walked calmly in front of Tsunade, ôYou must be Madame Tsunade. Naruto has told me so much about you, and I am very pleased to finally meet you.ö
Naruto waved, ôHey, Baa-chan, itÆs been a while. I want to introduce you to Vanilla-chan and-ö
The little one tugged on NarutoÆs shirt, ôDaddy, is that Granny?ö? The eyes of all in attendance shot open.
Naruto smiled, ôYes, Cream, thatÆs Tsunade, your grandmother.ö
ôGRANDMAMA!ö the little bunny missile launched herself at the blond woman, wrapping her arms around her waist, ôIÆm so happy to finally meet DaddyÆs Mommy!ö
Tsunade, being an experienced kunoichi and medic did the most appropriate thing she could think of.
She fell back unconscious.
*****
ôOh, man,ö Tsunade groaned, she cracked an eye and saw ShizuneÆs concerned expression, ôI should probably listen to you about cutting back on the booze, I just had the freakiest dream about Naruto and some weird giant rabbits.ö
ôWeÆre not weird, Grandmamma,ö TsunadeÆs eyes shot open at that voice, before it continued hesitantly, ôA-are we, Daddy?ö
ôNo, honey, Granny TsunadeÆs just not used to Mobians,ö Naruto assured his daughter, ôRemember the stories of when I first met your mommy? She just needs time to adjust.ö
Tsunade was up like a shot, seeing the odd family again, her left eye twitching. Naruto was sitting at the base of a tree with his apparent daughter in his lap, the girlÆs mother leaning on him with her head on his shoulder, her left arm in his right. If the females where human, it would seem like a perfectly normal family moment, and part of her still æawwÆed at the picture, but the fact of the matter stuck with her, Naruto had been gone for the better part of a decade, and just returned with two creature which looked like they were almost summons, one that he said was his daughter and the other presumably his wife.
I feel happy he found someone, but this is just soàfreaky, Tsunade couldnÆt help but think. She turned to one of the ANBU accompanying her, ôTora, Give us somewhere to talk, alone.ö
ôYes, maÆam, Mokuton: Shich?ka no Jutsuö The ANBU clasped his hands together as tendrils of wood shot from the ground, shaping themselves into a small house. The eyes of both Naruto and Cream shone in awe.
ôThat was SOOOO COOOOL!ö They both cried out, proving to some they were related.
ôNaruto, come in and bring your family, you have some explaining to do,ö Tsunade said as she opened the door, Naruto and co. following after.
Once the blondes and bunnies where in the house, the rookies let out a collectively held breath, they were glad their friend was back, and they knew he always pulled off the unexpected, but this was beyond ridiculous.
ôMan,ö Tenten sighed, breaking the silence, ôAnd I thought KibaÆs family had odd relations with animals.ö
ôHey!ö Kiba growled.
ôHold on, guys,ö Chouji cut in, ôShe seems like any person here, and IÆd guess if the little rabbit is his kid, then the big one might be his wife or something, I donÆt think we should just act like sheÆs some animal or anything.ö
ôFor all we know,ö Shikamaru continued, ôThey could be the norm where theyÆre from, they might be from rabbit the way weÆre from monkeys and apes.ö
ôBut HOW!?ö Sakura yelped, finally speaking, ôHow can he have a kid with her?!ö
Ino sniggered, ôI thought you were a medic, Sakura. IÆd guess they *giggle* did it like bunnies in heat and the kid eventually was born.ö
Sakura twitched, ôEven if they evolved like that wherever sheÆs from, no matter how similar, thereÆs no way two completely different species should be able to interbreed like that!ö
As the rookies talked-slash-argued, no one seemed to notice one girl who didnÆt speak, she didnÆt even really move, she just slumped against the tree behind her with tears in her eyes.
*****
ôAlright, Naruto, youÆve been gone for almost ten years, and now you show up with a wife and kid, both of whom,ö Tsunade paused, thinking of the right thing to say, ôNeither of whom are human. Now youÆd better tell me what the hell is going on before I blast you through a wall.ö
ôAlright, Baa-chan, alright, donÆt have a stroke,ö Naruto waved her off, ôFirst, introductions, this is Vanilla Uzumaki, my wife, and our daughter Cream. They are Mobians. When I had that accident with Ero-Sennin, I ended up in their dimension on their planet, Mobius. Mobians are mostly animal people like Nilla-chan and Cream, some are rabbits like them, and some are like other animals.ö
ôSo there are no humans?ö Tsunade asked, intrigued.
ôKinda, but not like us. As far as we can find, there were a long, long, looooong time ago, and they had way more advanced technology than us, but didnÆt seem to have or know of chakra like we do. But, and I know this sounds a bit weird, some really advanced aliens showed up. The humans at the time got kinda stupid and thought it would be a good idea to dissect the aliens to learn about them. When their friends found out, they dropped these special bombs on the planet called Gene-bombs that were meant to kill all the humans by de-evolving them, but leave everything else alive. It sorta worked, but not completely.ö
ôYou see, Madame Tsunade,ö Vanilla continued, ôWe donÆt exactly have any humans on Mobius, most were affected by the bomb and became what are called Overlanders. Overlanders are almost exactly like humans in looks, size and intelligence, but they have some genetic differences and,ö the rabbit gently took her husbandÆs wrist and held up his hand as he spread his fingers, ôunlike Mobians like myself, or Humans like you and my husband, Overlanders have four fingers, opposed to our five. And while the bombs didnÆt have the completely desired effect on the Humans, it had the opposite effect on the planets wildlife.ö
Naruto took over from here, ôThe animals got big pretty quick, at least faster than they should have. In, like, ten thousand years, they went from animals like we got, to, well,ö he motioned to his wife, ôNilla-chan. Some animals stayed the same, but other animals became Mobians too, foxes, squirrels, lizards, weasels, birds, dogs, cats, lots of them, and even if they arenÆt human, Baa-chan, theyÆre still æhumanÆ.ö
ôIn fact Madame Tsunade,ö Mrs. Uzumaki cut back in, ôIt is widely believed on Mobius that the reason we evolved so quickly, even with the gene bombs, is because human DNA became partially absorbed into our ancestors systems because of the bombs.ö
ôSo is that how you two were able to have Cream?ö Tsunade asked, getting a blush from both parents.
ôActually, Cream was our own little surprise. ThereÆs never been any record of an Overlander and a Mobian having a child, and, as for humans, well, before Naruto there was no known human on the planet. We assumed that it wasnÆt really possible for the two of us to have a child, but, one day I felt ill, and Naruto took me to see Dr. Quack, months later,ö Vanilla rubbed her daughters head, ôLo and behold, we had our own, cute little miracle. Since then weÆve taken precautions, but it is comforting to know we have the option in the future.ö
Tsunade thought for a moment, ôWell, I know how you ended up there, how did you come back? That portal thing looked nothing like the Hiraishin.ö
ôOh, Tails made that,ö Naruto said, ôHeÆs a couple years older than Cream, but heÆs super smart, like, smarter than Shikamaru.? Once I got his help, it didnÆt take too long for him to find a way to get me back here. We just took a while to find some of the materials.ö
Tsunade looked to the younger rabbit, who seemed to be dozing off, ôAnd Cream?ö
ôShe just turned seven last month,ö Naruto said, smiling warmly at his daughter, ôBut sheÆs a lot smarter then I was at that age. IÆve taught her some base ninja techniques. I felt I had to afteràö His expression frosted over.
Vanila, seeing her husbandÆs approaching anger, placed a calming hand on his shoulder before explaining, ôThere is an Overlander on Mobius, an evil man named Ivo Robotnik, also called Eggman, who seeks to take over our world. He is extremely smart, and has created an empire of machines with a device that lets him turn living creatures into robots with no free will, as well as other foul machines, like things that drain energy from animals to run. Once, he found out about NarutoÆs power, and tried to get him to join him, then almost a year and a half ago, Eggman kidnapped Cream to try and make Naruto join him. Naruto and some friends of ours fought their way through his fortress, and he saved her just before she was robotized. Then Narutoàö
Vanilla trailed off a bit as NarutoÆs eyes hardened, ôI taught that fat ass to never, ever threaten my family.ö He looked to his wife and hugged her, kissing her forehead before looking to his sleeping daughter, ôBut even with that, Eggman can get cocky, so he might have tried again, and there are a lot of other bad guys on Mobius besides him, so I started teaching her, and I taught others too. Not all of them can, but some Mobians can use chakra, I donÆt really know why. But Cream,ö Naruto chuckled as his eyes lit up again, ôShe looks like her mother, but she really seems to take after me, sheÆs already able to use the Kage Bunshin, and she can make ten or fifteen on a good day. Always gets the other kids riled up when she uses it during games like tag or hide and seek.ö
ôAnd they help her with her schoolwork as well,ö Vanilla said with a smile, ôShe is the head of her class back home, and her teacher was suggesting that she skip a grade or two. Naruto has even tried teaching me a few things, IÆm not learning as fast as Cream, though.ö
ôNilla-chan does alright, but she can be a genius like I used to be sometimes,ö Naruto trailed off, grinning at his wife.
ôNaruto Uzumaki, donÆt you dare.ö Vanilla chastised her husband, a blush breaking through her light fur.
ôWhat happened?ö Tsunade asked, quickly becoming interested.
Naruto turned to the blonde, ôNilla-chan accidentally recreated my old Oiroke no Jutsu.ö Tsunade raised an eyebrow as he continued, ôI was teaching her to use the Henge, and as a test, I told her to transform into our friend, Rouge. Nilla-chan used the jutsu and became a completely perfect copy of Rouge, but she forgot to transform clothing as well.ö Naruto barely restrained his laughter enough to keep from waking Cream, ôAnd the best part is, Rouge was there, and all she did was give Nilla-chan pointers about her body.ö
Tsunade chuckled, but took pity on the woman and changed the subject, ôItÆs good to have you back, Naruto.ö It surprised the hell out of Tsunade how quickly their expressions changed after that statement, ôDid I say something wrong?ö
Naruto sighed, ôIÆm not sure if IÆm gonna stay, Baa-chan.ö TsunadeÆs eyes widened as he continued, ôDo get me wrong, IÆve missed Konoha, and believe it or not, life is simpler here, easier, something annoys you, you tell me to blow it up, I get paid, and we both go home happy. On Mobius, things get complicated with time travel, clones, mechanical doubles, double agents, evil and intrigue. However, unless thereÆs been a huge change since I left, here IÆm disliked, hated, insulted and scorned, even after all IÆve done for this village, many see me as a demon, and I canÆt even imagine how people will react to my wife and daughter once someone finds out they arenÆt human.ö
ôBut on Mobius, people accept me, my friends there have learned of Kyuubi, and they accept it, I have a loving family, and while it started a little rocky, everyone accepts us as a family, IÆm a respected fighter, and if I choose to return, I have a standing invitation to help train the Kings royal guard and be an actual advisor to the royal family, even be the personal guard of the princess if I wish, I have another offer to become an investigator with a friends detective office, or even a partnership offer to be a professional thief.ö Naruto gave the hokage a sincere and sad look as he pulled his wife close, ôBaa-chan, I love Konoha, and a part of me will always love it, but I canÆt just think of myself anymore. I have to think of whatÆs best not just for me, but Cream and Nilla-chan too. If they canÆt be accepted here, how can I believe theyÆll be safe if I get sent away on a mission? How could I concentrate on any mission when my family may be in danger from within my own village?ö
Tsunade sighed before taking a deep swig of sakÚ, she waited in silence for a moment, staring at the floor, before speaking, ôWhen the hell did you get so mature, you brat.ö She looked up with a sad smile, ôNo matter how old youÆd get, I never really thought youÆd grow up, figured you stay the same loud mouthed brat that never showed anyone any respect, the kid who made a bet with me by laying his dream on the line. Seeing you like thisàyou really make a woman feel old.ö
ôBut you are old, baa-chan,ö Naruto said with a smile, earning a light smack in the back of the head from his wife.
Tsunade smiled softly at the rabbit, ôWhether he stays or goes back, you realize heÆs your responsibility. He needs someone to keep him out of trouble.ö
Vanilla returned the smile, ôOf course, IÆm his wife. ItÆs my job.ö
Tsunade climbed to her feet, ôWell, wake the kid, we have introductions to make, and IÆll have to lay down the law with the jonin council. I want you happy, Naruto, but IÆd like you to be happy here so you can take this damn job off my hands and you can deal with the paperwork, so letÆs get to work.ö
