[Harry Potter]Miscellaneous ideas topic.

Schema

Well-Known Member
Hermione uses her blackmail material on Rita to become the DADA professor in place of Umbridge.

Shockingly she proves to be fairly adept at the subject, with all of the trouble she got into, and out of to get a story.
 

chronodekar

Obsessively signs his posts
Staff member
Schema said:
Hermione uses her blackmail material on Rita to become the DADA professor in place of Umbridge.

Shockingly she proves to be fairly adept at the subject, with all of the trouble she got into, and out of to get a story.
Would the reverse work? Rita uses her blackmail to become the next DADA professor and spends the year trying to 'accidentally' kill the golden trio for knowing her secret. In the process, they become competent at DADA ... in their usual fashion? :wacko:

-chronodekar
 

AoMythology

Well-Known Member
chronodekar said:
Schema said:
Hermione uses her blackmail material on Rita to become the DADA professor in place of Umbridge.

Shockingly she proves to be fairly adept at the subject, with all of the trouble she got into, and out of to get a story.
Would the reverse work? Rita uses her blackmail to become the next DADA professor and spends the year trying to 'accidentally' kill the golden trio for knowing her secret. In the process, they become competent at DADA ... in their usual fashion?  :wacko:

-chronodekar
Both ideas sound great.
 

Prince Charon

Well-Known Member
chronodekar said:
Schema said:
Hermione uses her blackmail material on Rita to become the DADA professor in place of Umbridge.

Shockingly she proves to be fairly adept at the subject, with all of the trouble she got into, and out of to get a story.
Would the reverse work? Rita uses her blackmail to become the next DADA professor and spends the year trying to 'accidentally' kill the golden trio for knowing her secret. In the process, they become competent at DADA ... in their usual fashion?  :wacko:

-chronodekar
That would be an interesting difference.
 

zerohour

Well-Known Member
The logic for putting the Philosopher's Stone in Hogwarts was that nothing else could protect it as well.

By definition, everything else is weaker than Hogwarts, any other method of protecting it would be weaker.

So, what if Voldemort, instead of going for the Philosopher's Stone, decided to go for the creator instead?  Nicholas Flamel would be easier to defeat than the defenses Dumbledore dreamed up, and Legilimency would reveal the secrets of the stone to the Dark Lord.  So even if he was somehow stopped after attaining this information, he would still have the knowledge of how to create a Philospher's Stone, and could revive himself without having to bother with a contrived ritual or anything like that.
 
I think it is because 1- Flamels are long-lived, their minds would be probably wel-protected and 2- Voldemort was in a BAD shape at the time.


I read a story of Harry meeting the Addams and becoming Wednesday's boyfriend. I can't say much about the story, but I did enjoy the idea save for one point...
The author made Harry be a psychopath and evil since a kid. Dumbledore had been forced to brainwash him and all the Dursleys but Vernon (he explicitly says it would not be needed for him) to treat him badly and so he acts normally, and needs to reapply them from time to time because Harry breaks the brainwashing from time to time.

That really sours the story to me. Why can't Harry just meet the Addams and get along with them, just shrugging and accepting things since they aren't hurting anyone else, without needing to be mentally unstable? We had an old... ok, a children's cartoon, where a child befriends them.
I mean yes, in the movies the boy that tried to date Wednesday ended up being tricked by her and presumably being either scared away or scared dead, but it was clear to me even at a young age that he only did all that for her to get in a relationship with her, not real acceptance, and I doubt she would just roll with it now that he wasn't useful.
But while I admit I didn't see all the movies and tv series (well, I assume I didn't see all the movies, maybe I did... were they only three?) this movie and when there was a zombie trying to kill Gomez were the only cases I saw myself where they went to actually malicious.

Been thinking about trying to write my own version of the story. One where, instead of Harry being psycho, he just rolls with it, like he rolled with the Weasleys' own eccentricities... just, you know, more. Been thinking of doing it on Fifth Year instead of the Sixth of the mentioned fic too.
 

Shirotsume

Not The Goddamn @dmin
Random crack idea: Dumbledore decides 5th year that he might as well go for broke and hires an assassin with a hit on Harry for the DADA teacher.

Everyother person in the universe is rather taken aback by this, even Fudge.

Could be an amusing fic where everyone finally works together just out of sheer wut and trying to keep Harry alive.
 
I dunno. Harry might actually end up appreciating the fact everybody knows that the new DADA professor is trying to kill him this time, as well as the fact that the general consensus is that it's perfectly acceptable for him to defend himself with even lethal force.
 

Shirotsume

Not The Goddamn @dmin
Who would have actually put the hit out, though?
 
Does the assassin's employer need to be public knowledge? If not, then rando rich Voldemort supporter who put out an international hit on Harry so he couldn't flee the country?
 
Dumbledore.
"You want me to kill... Harry Potter? You?"
"Ok, let me be honest. Every other teacher for this subject either tried to kill him, or almost did it by accident anyway. So I am both cutting out the middleman by pretending it won't happen and hiring someone with actual experience dealing with the Dark Arts, even if as an user."
 

Shirotsume

Not The Goddamn @dmin
oh god, that would be the best part- every other person in the universe, including fudge, being confused by this... would include the assassin.
 

daniel_gudman

KING (In Land of Blind)
Staff member
I would definately write it that the assassin was totally phoning it in with half-assed cartoon plans, on the premise that being the DADA teacher is a sweet gig and he's trying to stretch it out to the end. He's basically spending the entire year in a drunken retired haze.

He's trying to read between the lines that's Dumbledore wants him to fail, and Dumbles is like "frig, you can't cheat curses like that."

Maybe the assassin bullies Snape too, always dragging him out to the bar to get drunk and sticking Snap with the bill, and then keeping the lights down during class because he's hung over.

So I guess I've talked myself into a story where, like, Mundungus Fletcher was the DADA professor because he's literally the only person that applied, and he's just a totally irresponsible adult, always fencing Snape's potion supplies and getting students caught up in get-rich-quick schemes.
 

chronodekar

Obsessively signs his posts
Staff member
Yorae Rasante said:
Dumbledore.
"You want me to kill... Harry Potter? You?"
"Ok, let me be honest. Every other teacher for this subject either tried to kill him, or almost did it by accident anyway. So I am both cutting out the middleman by pretending it won't happen and hiring someone with actual experience dealing with the Dark Arts, even if as an user."
Oh Lord! I can't stop laughing at this idea!! :D :rofl:

-chronodekar
 

Altered Nova

Well-Known Member
And of course, the assassin would ironically be the best DADA teacher Hogwarts had ever had. To everyone else's shock, Harry willingly and enthusiastically attends the assassin's classes, even if he has to dodge the occasional booby trap and check his meals for poisons, because he's actually learning how defend against the dark arts. He's even learning how to properly duel by defending himself when the assassin directly attacks him at the end of each class.
 
Yeah, I can't help but think that Harry would, after some initial resistance, be totally on-board with this. There's no ambiguity with this situation. He doesn't have to wait for the professor's homocidal tendancies to reveal themselves. He doesn't have to spend time investigating and figuring out that their hidden agenda is.

Plus his classmates and the general public (or the majority of them) aren't ignorant of the situation, and are probably rooting for him.
 

Altered Nova

Well-Known Member
And if the assassin is just phoning it in because he likes being a teacher, I could totally see him and Harry becoming sort of friends over the whole thing.

"Harry, why on earth do you keep attending that maniac's classes? We all know it isn't just 'hands-on training', he's actually trying to kill you!"

"Yeah, but he's also teaching me how to detect and defeat his methods! I've learned more about defending against the dark arts in the past month than I have every previous year combined."

*A low rumble fills the room for a second, and Harry suddenly dives to the ground as a screeching magical projectile flies past and blows a hole in the wall*

"Good dodge Harry! I see you remembered my warning that the sonic blast spell is always preceded by a low frequency sound vibration! 10 points to Gryffindor!"

"Thanks professor Lethalstein!"

"...Harry, you are nuts."
 

zerohour

Well-Known Member
Probably could get a chapter or two out of the assassin's disbelief at the situation, convincing himself that this is a huge trap, and every time Harry seems vulnerable, it's a clever method to ensnare him and lock him away.
 

Prince Charon

Well-Known Member
An idea that's probably not totally new, but that I don't think I've seen done in exactly this manner, or done all that well:

All the Black portraits are Horcruces (Latin plural of Horcrux, AFAICT), which is why Sirius doesn't have one (though if Sirius had succeeded in getting Snape killed by Lupin and had bothered to come home after that, Walburga would have taught him how to make one, because she would have been proud of him for arranging for a werewolf to kill a half-blood). This is unlikely to affect the plot on its own, unless the presence of so many horcruces starts messing with the minds of anyone who spends too long in that house (which would explain a lot about Sirius's family), but things could go off from canon a bit more if someone finds out that the house is full of them.

One amusing/interesting possibility is that Phineas Nigellus learn that Hermione is researching the horcrux, and decides to 'help' her a bit - his reasoning is that he's an educator; her being a Muggleborn means he'll be an asshole to her, but he'll still do his best to teach her anyway, because it's been more than a decade since anyone wanted to learn from him, and being more sapient than a typical painting, he gets bored.
 

zerohour

Well-Known Member
Just wondering what Dumbledore could have done to mitigate or prevent Voldemort's return.

Assuming that Malfoy or some other influential Death Eater could prevent overt moves like locking up everyone who claimed Imperious or something similar, what else could he have done?

Answer:
Publish: Ascension to Power: The Transformation from Tom Marvolo Riddle to Lord Voldemort
 

AoMythology

Well-Known Member
Small idea: Someone refers to Horcruxes as "Whorescrotches". :p

Edit: now that I think of it, this sounds like something Rorschatch's Blot would come up with in his lists of things he wants to see in fics. :sweat: I assure you, it was unintentional. ^_^
 

chronodekar

Obsessively signs his posts
Staff member
I'm ... conflicted if I'd want to read it or not.

-chronodekar
 

da_fox2279

California Crackpot
AoMythology said:
Small idea: Someone refers to Horcruxes as "Whorescrotches". :p

Edit: now that I think of it, this sounds like something Rorschatch's Blot would come up with in his lists of things he wants to see in fics. :sweat: I assure you, it was unintentional. ^_^
"So the only way to truly defeat You-Know-Who is to hunt down and kill all the prostitutes in Knockturn Alley?"

"Yes, Harry."

"But I can't go to Knockturn! My mum will kill me!"

"I'm sure she'll understand, Ron..."
 
AoMythology said:
Small idea: Someone refers to Horcruxes as "Whorescrotches". :p

Edit: now that I think of it, this sounds like something Rorschatch's Blot would come up with in his lists of things he wants to see in fics. :sweat: I assure you, it was unintentional. ^_^
I don't see it really leading anywhere.

FWIW, I've seen them referred to as "shitboxes".
 
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