Iron Fic 5-4 The Challenges of Faith

Watashiwa

Administrator
Staff member
#1
The role of religion in human life is rarely given proper respect in fanfiction. More people in human history have belonged to one than not, and billions of people look to religious teachings as a guide to right living. That isn't to say that religion is universally good; too often religious faith is used to justify base thoughts and actions, and the temporal power accorded religious figures is just as easily abused as any other

Your challenge today is to write about how religion challenges a person or people in your choice of fandom. What is it that they believe? Are they part of an organized religion, or do they follow a more open system of beliefs? Are they polytheist, monotheist, a nature worshiper, or a rare atheist? And why?

Challenges to faith are many. Death and other loss, war and famine and similar misfortunes. Depression, and evil committed by religious leaders. Perhaps one of the greatest challenges to faith is proof of the divine in either direction--what if a character's religious conviction is proven right? What if it's proven wrong?

Due to the lateness in the post of this prompt, the deadline has been extended an extra hour to 4PM PDT.



You have four (and a half) hours. The challenge is made!
 

Ninsaneja

Well-Known Member
#5
Iron Fic 5-4 Judging Notes
Glimmervoid – The Laundry Files – LITTLE BROTHER
Writing Proficiency: 18/20
Incorrect tense


Theme (Challenges of Faith): 17/20
It's not really religion so much as lovecraftian entities. They're similar, but I would definitely not call any of the involved “faith.”

Source (TLF): 20/20
Generosity.

Story: 16/20
Story drags at times.

Other: 18/20
I wasn't very interested in the story.

Total: 89/100


Seitora – Touhou – The Meaning of Hakurei
Writing Proficiency: 20/20


Theme (Challenges of Faith): 20/20

Source (Touhou): 20/20

Story: 16/20
Story drags.

Other: 10(12)/20
I did not like the story very much at all. I barely managed to finish reading it.
Late

Total: 86/100

Wata is a failure. Get your act together! haha.
 
#6
Well, seeing as we had so many entries, it took me awhile, but here are my results:

Seitora

Fic: The Meaning of Hakurei
Fandom: Touhou

Writing Proficiency: 18/20

Some odd word choices at points, and a lot of the sentences seem to go on forever. I chalked that up to style. There were a few errors in relation to punctuation surrounding the quotations for speech, but overall it was very technically sound.

Theme: 18/20

You directly addressed the theme, which is good. However, the philosophical conversation felt forced and without sufficient build-up. So I took the points for that off here, rather than the "story" section.

Source: 19/20

I know nothing about Touhou, but I could picture the interactions fairly well. The one point off is for Shino, who appears to be an OC. I would think that with a cast as massive as Touhou's, you could find somebody to bring up the issue without needing him. (If he's not an OC and I just can't find him through Google, by all means, 20/20). It definitely perked my interest in Touhou.

Story: 16/20

It flowed well, and I always had a good picture of what was going on. That said, it felt slow and rushed at the same time. I never really felt like anything of great importance was happening, but the conversation (which is the centerpiece of the fic) felt like it went by too quickly. From the way the conversation went, I expected to see a semi-humorous ending about Shino starting up a new religion in Gensokyo that stirs up all kinds of trouble, but instead had an ambiguous ending in the graveyard. (More points would be taken off for that, but I give you credit for working the theme into Reimu in the process).

Other: 15/20 (17/20)

I never felt invested or interested in the events. Also, late.

Total: 86/100



Glimmervoid

Fic: Little Brother
Fandom: Laundry Files

Writing Proficiency: 18/20

There were a few issues with commas. Also some word choice errors (alter vs altar). Overall very solid.

Theme: 20/20

Excellent use of narrative to explore the theme indirectly while still having it be the focus of the story.

Source: 20/20

I know nothing about this universe besides the fact that I have Amazon open in another tab and The Atrocity Archives in my shopping cart.

Story: 20/20

It flowed very well, and I would very much like to read more of the story. I was never not entertained, whether it be by the tongue-in-cheek tone (which I assume mimics the original works) or by the way I could never quite predict where things were going. (Perfect example: the opening paragraph, which starts out like a typical religious sermon and ends with "hungry for your soul.")

Other: 18/20

My only criticism is that I never actually had a good picture of what was going on. There were a number of characters introduced, but I have no idea what any of them or their surroundings look like. Great job.

Overall: 96/100
 

Watashiwa

Administrator
Staff member
#7
A late start on my part unsettled the contestants, though two brave souls came through with ideas and keyboards of fire. A head to head contest between previous winners!

[The Laundry Files] LITTLE BROTHER by Glimmervoid. 93. 89+96+93= 278(Ave. 92.67)
[Touhou] The Meaning of Hakurei by Seitora 72. 86+86+72=244. (Ave. 81.33)

Good work again Glimmervoid! Better luck next time Seitora!

Thank you all for reading, writing and judging. See you on Saturday!
 
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