Meinos Kaen said:
And damn, Star Tournament. Those were the days... And what was that about drama scenes? 'Cause I think I need some help with that still.
Yeah, it's a problem because they're actually reading A LOT like stiff dialogue and there's always too much action going on from the characters. How do I say this? They do too much and the narration doesn't do enough; if that makes sense.
Also, your dialogue is very polarizing... in preference. Your Naruto fics actually have very good dialogue; improper grammar and slang and all that, but your novel is very... stiff; formal.
You're a good writer, bro, but you're not Pantheon material.
Now kiss Isaac Asimov's feet and say three Hail Harper Lees before you leave.