He-who-voted-for-Kodos said:
Although I can kind of see Loki going along with some of the not so evil things that he thinks are funny. Like that "fake presidential campaign just to bug Superman" thing, I can totally see Loki finding out about that and keeping quiet because he thinks it's kind of hilarious.
I could see him making Supes a surrogate for minor pranks as Thor is unavailable and Clark's status as the golden boy of DC would get to him from time to time. Actually, I could see Wally helping with that. Honestly though, I think he;d get more mileage over taunting any annoying bad guys. Imagine, during Lex's "presidential campaign," if Lex started to spontaneously regrow his hair whenever he gave a speech. The problem? It's always something improbable and embarrassing. One time it's a natural rainbow clown wig. Another time it's Sakura pink. Another it's not hair at all but brown Play-doh. Another, he grows a Hitler mustache and bowl cut.
And now, I think a snippet is in order.
Loki's return to Midgard was rather uneventful all things considered. In fact, in the next few weeks the most interesting thing to come up was the construction of a base of operations in space for the seven heroes that the media had taken to calling the "Justice League."
The God of Mischief (and of Chaos and Evil depending on which mortal you asked) had to smirk as local media in his newly adopted city actually seemed miffed that he was not included in their number. There was talk of something of an "East Coast bias" due that mirrored one in collegiate sports due the face Loki was operating on the West Coast. The fact that Loki had made a public and significant impact fighting the Imperium soldiers for more than a day on his own before the League arrived to clean up the leftovers and take out the smokestack factory didn't hurt as people voiced their opinions. The complained similarly about the exclusion of the other nearest hero, one "Green Arrow" although his reputation as a mortal fighting "street crime" had some scoffing that he did not belong in the League the way Loki did.
"He's no Batman" was uttered more than once where Loki could overhear it. It made Loki want to pay closer attention to "weak mortal" of the League. A mortal man that can walk with near gods without fear is someone to respect. And to be wary of. Loki himself was living proof that a quick and devious mind can be more dangerous than all the strength and battle prowess in the world when used correctly. He had a feeling Batman provided further evidence of that fact quite regularly.
It was in the aftermath of the attempted assassination of the local King of Altantis, called Aquaman here for some reason, that drove home just how different the locals were to the Midgard he had observed. For all his gruff demeanor, King Orin seemed to be a much more level-headed and likeable person when compared the mercurial Namor that ruled over the Atlantins of the Midgard Loki remembered.
It was soon after the incident that Loki was approached by the Amazon Diana again while he rested in "civilian clothes" in a park one afternoon.
"Lady Diana," Loki said with a polite incline of his head to the Amazon princess as he watched the children around him playing. It probably said something about the attitude in Los Angeles toward seeing "celebrities" out in public that none of the children playing in the park, not their watchful parents, even paused in their activities at the sight of Wonder Woman in full uniform. A smirk crossed his face as saw one child in a group playing "Justice League" wearing a bad plastic imitation of his own helmet. It looks like the little boy he had rescued his first day here might have got his wish for a Loki doll after all.
"Lord Loki. We have seen on the news recently that you have returned. Were you able to find a path to Asgard?" Diana asked formally.
Loki's good humor seemed to dampen as he nodded to the Amazon as he responded, "I fear I did. It was not pleasant news. Ragnarok has indeed claimed the counterparts to my family on this plane."
Diana winced in sympathy as she awkwardly replied, "My condolences."
Loki accepted her sympathies with a nod of thanks before looking at her in askance as he said, "You do not need to stand at attention on my account. Please, sit. Enjoy the pleasant weather with me."
Diana smiled in thanks as she took a seat next to the dimensionally displaces deity and proceeded to watch the various mortals enjoying the day around her. It was so different than her own life on Themyscira, and yet there was a peace to watching people enjoy themselves outdoors. "It is very peaceful here," she said after a time.
"Indeed. It some ways it reminds me of the gardens of Asgard. Although you were not likely to see children playing at being me often there. Sometimes, if there were too may to just be Thor and the Warriors three, but not often," Loki replied with a far off look.
"You must miss your home a great deal," Diana said, unsure of what else to say.
"I do. Though knowing now how far away I am, I don't know if I will see it again. No doubt they would think I have perished falling from the Bifrost as I did. Even if Heimdall could find me across dimensions he would have to be looking for me first. And I imagine it will be some time before anyone thinks to ask my daughter if I have joined her the realm of the dead. My children are not well received by my comrades, after all," Loki answered with a note of bitterness.
"So you have fathered children just as our Loki did?" Diana asked.
"Aye. Jormungandr the World Serpent, Fenrir the Great Wolf, and Hela the Goddess of the Dead and ruler of Nifelheim. All of them born of the sorceress Angrboda. And I suppose you could include Sleipnir, although he is only my "child" be way of a stallion impregnating a magical construct of mine. Do not believe everything you read in a book of mythology," Loki said with a smirk.
Diana's face reddened. All of the League had been reading up on the Norse pantheon since meeting Loki and many of the stories were less than flattering. Although both Batman and Flash had pointed out that the stories in question were about Loki Farbutson and not Loki Odinson. And Diana knew well from how mangled some of the "history" in Man's World was in regards to her own people that the stories should be taken with a grain of proverbial salt. "Your counterpart did not have stellar reputation," Diana admitted with a wry grin of her own.
Loki's expression sobered as he replied, "He did not deserve one. The aftermath of Ragnarok here looked a great deal like the so-called prophecies mortals came up with about my home. And considering that I know for a fact than many of those stories were multiple retellings of embellishments my fellow Asgardians made to the locals while drunk off their arses, it makes me wonder how they could come so horrifically true here."
"When you have the time, the League would be interested in knowing what was true and what wasn't. Batman and J'onn both seem to be the scholarly sort," Diana admitted.
"As am I. Although I do not picture either of them reading much on magicks when it was not needed to avert some crisis. Regardless, I would be amenable to speaking with them and your other compatriots again. If this is to be my home I should at least get to know my neighbors, so to speak," Loki responded.
"Will you live here on Earth or return to Asgard?" Diana asked.
Loki looked a bit haunted as he replied, "I could think of no more desolate lodgings than Asgard as they stand now. The whole realm was devoid of life Diana. Not so much as a Bilchsteim in the forests. No I prefer to stay here, among the living. The mortals here are entertaining, if nothing else."
"They are a curiosity, that much is certain," Diana agreed.
"Besides, I might need the help of you and your League at some point. There was... a message left by the Allfather of this plane asking to help make certain the Realm Eternal was secured after his passing. I would honor that request," Loki admitted.
Diana nodded in understanding as she replied, "A warrior's debt. Batman might be able to help with that. He is skilled at organizing things. When you cam convince him that helping is worth his time, at least. He is very pro-occupied with protecting his city above all others, from what I have heard."
"Would you not be similarly occupied if your isle of Themyscira were here among the mortals?" Loki asked with a raised brow.
"Point taken. Still it is rather frustrating when the man that seems to be the best strategist and general among us is not with us full time. The man is... most vexing at times. But he is still a noble warrior deserving of my respect," Diana said with a note of pride.
"He seems to have made an impression on you, Your Highness," Loki commented.
"It was he who defeated the Imperium. He learned the secrets of their own technology and used it against them as J'onn shielded his mind to make them believe he had perished. I could never imagine a mortal man with no powers other than his own mind could accomplish so much," Diana admitted.
"A well respected mortal general of the past named Sun Tzu said "All war is based on deception." Those were wise words indeed. Words the Allfather practiced many times, even if he would not say them aloud," Loki supplied.
"They are very different from what we learned on Themyscira," Diana said with a frown.
"They were not exactly encouraged on my Asgard either. Asgardians tended to prefer to attack head on and damn the consequences. I suppose that route is less destructive to your forces when you are immortal and close to invulnerable. The mortals had to take a different path to avoid destruction. It seems to have worked so far," Loki countered with a shrug.
"Once again, Batman is proof of that," Diana agreed.
Loki did not bother to point out that Diana seemed to have Batman very much on the brain. He could not blame her for her interest. The man a mystery was a hard thing to pass up. Especially one that seemed to be the real power of the League behind Superman's "throne." It was a position Loki understood well. There was a time. before the bitterness of the years had come between them, that Loki had pictured himself in a similar position with Thor. After all, his brother may have been anything but scholarly but he was still the eldest and the strongest of the House of Odin's new generation. He would need Loki to watch out for the mistakes his ego would get him into.
That, like so many dreams of Loki's youth, was not to be. Looking at what had remained of another Asgard with what he suspected was a similarly slighted Loki leading the charge, perhaps it was for the best.
The conversation between the two immortals was cut short as a child ran up to the pair shouting "Mr. Loki! Mr. Loki! Can you make the statue in the center of the park chase us again like you did last week? We want to pretend its a 'Perium Walker."
Both Diana and Loki smiled indulgently at the question that had come from a girl no older than seven or eight, wearing "Wonder Woman bracelets" that seemed to be made out of duct tape. Diana was the first to respond as she said, "I think it is time for me to go. It looks like you have pressing business. I'll let the others know you agreed to meeting them." With that she rose and took a few steps away before rising into the sky to fly back toward where she was supposed to teleport back to the Watchtower. As she departed, her smile grew wider as Loki explained that the mayor had asked him not to bring the statue to life again because things like that tended to worry some people, but he could make them another construct to "fight" that wasn't so dangerous to have with children underfoot if they so desired.
The last sight Diana caught before flying off into the distance was what looked like a ten foot tall "Walker" made out of marshmallows as the kids laughed and played around it. Yes, Diana would be able to report that the Odinson was settling in just fine.