Evangelion Jog On

#51
PCHeintz72 said:
For NGE Sausages it was a Tuesday comes immediately to mind.
I don't think I've read all of that one, but didn't it include Shinji seducing Ritsuko/the other way around at one point?

Da-Guru said:
Well, it could end with Shinji becoming an Eldritch Abomination.
Which doesn't rule out tentacle porn, you'd note.
 

Da-Guru

Well-Known Member
#53
Is it wrong that I've been reading fanfics for so long that I don't even notice most spelling errors?
 

Lord Raa

Exporter of Juice Tins
#54
Da-Guru said:
Is it wrong that I've been reading fanfics for so long that I don't even notice most spelling errors?
Yes it is.

It gets unsettling when you don't notice your own spelling/grammar errors.
 

Da-Guru

Well-Known Member
#55
Oh, I notice my spelling errors, most of the time. It's just that when reading something someone else wrote, I dial my "this is wrong and I must harm the person responsible" senses down to about a 3/10 compared to the 6/10 when dealing with my own writing.
 

ThreadWeaver

Beware of Dog. Cat not trustworthy either.
#56
ôNERV does not threaten people to get what it wants like schoolyard bully,ö Ritsuko sighed. She cast a look at Misato that told her to go along until they had a chance to talk in private. ôI realise that it looks that way from your perspective, but we do try to be reasonable.ö
That is the funniest thing I've read all week.

"Yeah, sure you're reasonable and don't threaten people, you just drug them and kidnap them.

"'Oh, but you can't leave,' you say. That is about as close to a threat as I've ever seen.

"And you two along with my piece of crap father are the fine upstanding examples of humanity that I'm supposed to be fighting for? Crap, you've just doomed the planet. Where's the button?"

He's got us there, Ritsuko ground out to herself. "What button?"

"The big freaking red button that nukes the planet. Might as well get it over with if you are the examples of what I'm fighting for."

"..."
 

Lord Raa

Exporter of Juice Tins
#57
         
 

Lord Raa

Exporter of Juice Tins
#60
As for Gendo's faith in Ritsuko, remember that he knows how dirty Akagi women can be.
 

PCHeintz72

The Sentient Fanfic Search Engine mk II
#62
Ritsuko hissed into her phone just at the call was dropped. ôWhat? Stupidàö
Gasp... Maya hung up on Ritsuko?

Whatever, since you lost my clothes, you can buy me new ones.
I like this line, but felt one of the two shoulld have commented on it, especially since Misato's money is going toward her car, her rent, and her beer.

Still, if Shinji likes her, then it should make things easier.
I'm not really convinced Shinji likes her that much. Especially when he discovers he's been played.

ôDid you really order ShinjiÆs clothes to be burnt?ö

ôHis things are being sent here,ö
This may be mincing words... but clothes and things are not the same, I could easily see Gendo pulling such a thing.

I have faith in your abilities and resourcefulness, Dr. Akagi,
I have to wonder at Gendo's angle, as he has to have one to compliement her like that.
 

PCHeintz72

The Sentient Fanfic Search Engine mk II
#64
Hmmm...


Nerv is not that easy to exit from... you have checkpoints, ramps and escalators, and trolly cars taking you to the surface. Then he could walk the streets.


If you wanted to make it interesting... have him get on the suspension trolly just and Misato/Ritsuko catch up as the doors close.
 

Da-Guru

Well-Known Member
#65
BRILLIANT! That would be brilliant.

And even better, have someone be on the car already, one of the bridge techs. And Shinji explains the situation to him/her. (Double points if it's a woman/girl) Maybe he gets an offer of a change of clothes or even a place to crash. Hmm, potential.
 

PCHeintz72

The Sentient Fanfic Search Engine mk II
#66
Da-Guru said:
BRILLIANT! That would be brilliant.

And even better, have someone be on the car already, one of the bridge techs. And Shinji explains the situation to him/her. (Double points if it's a woman/girl) Maybe he gets an offer of a change of clothes or even a place to crash. Hmm, potential.
Only female bridge tech we know from original TV series is Maya.

There are the new ones in the movies I read about though.
 

FourthWall

Well-Known Member
#67
Y'know, if the fucking you're obviously leading to doesn't work, I see this Shinji getting a 9mm going away present courtesy of his father. Hell, I want to put a bullet in the little bastard's brain right now, just to shut him up. His petulance will only take him so far, logically.

It's not like humanity is completely fucked without him, nor is the scenario. Mind you, this is when Gendo still when he gave a damn about Rei, and there are Reiclones in the tank, so he has other options.

They could also bring 'suka over without Unit 02, see if she can cross-sync. Rei's been shown to be able to cross-sync with 01 (and piloted the damn thing in the manga!Sachiel fight). Yui only pitches a bitch during the Zeruel fight, and that just seemed like plot contrivance after Bardiel.

The female bridge bunnies are from one of the dating sim games, I thought. The ones Ero-Sennin uses in ARSENAL.
 

T.L

Well-Known Member
#69
Haven't read a NGE fic for ages.
I'd thought I'd read just about everything there was to read in the genre.
Nice to see Lord Raa that you are able to put a slant on things to make it interesting again.
It's Lord fuckin' Raa, what the hell else would it end in?
sometimes I wouldn't want it any other way.
 

PCHeintz72

The Sentient Fanfic Search Engine mk II
#70
Ehhh...

You mean where he stomps on her foot, spins around. slams a palm into her abdomen, causing her to lose her grip on him and fall on her but, and he turns and flees while she recovers and Ritsuko helps her back up.

Bummer, I was looking forward to it.
 

ThreadWeaver

Beware of Dog. Cat not trustworthy either.
#72
I like this story a lot. A story where Shinji has the same persecution complex but consciously figures out that it's the fault of those around him rather than his own inadequacies and acts accordingly. Please continue.

Honestly, I was expecting him to knee his father in the nuts as they met in the hall.

------------------------------
The two males squared off and everyone was waiting for Gendo to discipline his headstrong son.

Even the women winced as Shinji raised his knee at almost a lightning pace into Gendo's groin, nearly lifting Gendo off the floor with the force.

Gendo tried to look like the man he played himself to be but failed miserably as his next breath in squeaked. He dropped to the floor like a fumbled bag of potatoes, almost retching.

"Oh, you still here old man? I guess I shouldn't be then. Didn't think I could kick that high, did you?"
-----------------------------
 

Sunhawk

Well-Known Member
#74
TurfSurfer said:
Genericrandom said:
If possession is nine-tenths of the law, Gendo just repo'd his ass, right?
I can't help but chuckle as I picture Shinji with REPO in big, red, block-letters stamped on his forehead.
(belatedly) Something like this?

 

Lord Raa

Exporter of Juice Tins
#75
Have a repost that removes weird formatting.

I have no idea what I should be writing next for this or for any story, so I don't know when there will be more.

@@@@@
Jog On

By Lord Raa


@@@@@


Disclaim-me-do: It is not an offence to be naked in public in England and Wales.


@@@@@


“Shinji Ikari, just what do you think you're playing at?” a stern voice demanded.

“What do you mean, Morita-sensei?”

“I mean that your response to the career questionnaire. 'I don't care' is not an appropriate response to what you intend to do with your life.”

“But I don't care, Morita-sensei. I don't really care about anything,” Shinji answered with a shrug. “And does it matter in the end?”

“And why not? You should be enjoying your youth, not moping about the futility of existence just because a girl rejected you,” Morita-sensei chided.

Shinji sighed. He'd tried talking about his problems with others, but they all just told him to grit his teeth and bear the burden. Morita-sensei himself had been one of those people when Shinji had been feeling down at the anniversary of his mother's death.

Rolling his eyes, the young Ikari replied. “Sorry, Sensei, I shall endeavour to be more cheerful during the height of my youth. Now, if you'll excuse me, I've got to go and do something outrageously exciting so I can have stories to tell the children I'm not going to have.”

Morita scowled at the young boy's sarcastic tone, but the bell that signalled the end of lunch rang and a mass of students prevented him from berating Shinji further.

Shinji used the crowd to disappear, for once he was thankful that he didn't stand out.


@@@@@


Arriving at home, Shinji was surprised to see that there was a letter for him. It was unusual for anyone to send him any correspondence, so he was mildly excited by the prospect of something different for a Wednesday.

'NERV,' he noted from the stationery. 'Father works for NERV...'

With that association triggered in his mind, Shinji put the white envelope down, unsure if he wanted to see what was inside. It had been four years since he had last seen his father, and they hadn't parted on good terms.

In fact, Shinji wondered if had ever been on good terms with his father.

He struggled to think of a time when his father had ever considered him as anything more than a burden or annoyance.

Scowling, Shinji picked up the envelope and tried to think of a reason why his father would want to contact him. Nothing came to mind.

Looking around the presently unoccupied house, a thought entered Shinji's head. 'Maybe Father's dead...'

“Good,” he whispered. Taking the envelope into the kitchen and sitting down, he carefully opened the envelope, as if tearing it open would change its contents.

Shinji pulled out the message and glanced at the top line.

“¬Shinji Ikari, you have been summoned to Tokyo-3.

A rail pass has been enclosed to get you here.¬”

“What does he want me for?” the young man demanded from the empty room. “And why should I go to see him?”

Shinji felt his blood boil at the impersonal nature of the letter. “He can piss off if he thinks that I'm willing to help him!”

Rushing to the hallway where he left his bag, the young Ikari reached inside for a piece of blank paper. After furiously scribbling a message, he placed it inside the envelope. He resealed it and wrote 'Return to Sender' and 'For the Attention of Gendo Ikari' on the front.

“Ha!” Shinji smirked. “That'll show him.”


@@@@


Two days later, Gendo Ikari was being made aware that his son was being difficult.

“I see,” he said neutrally. “Perhaps the direct method is not always the most efficient when dealing with overly emotional people.”

He picked up his phone and dialled Captain Misato Katsuragi.

“¬Moshi-moshi,¬” a female voice replied.

“Captain Katsuragi, I have a new task for you. Send a message to the Third Child and ensure his arrival here at NERV as soon as possible.”

“¬I... Commander, but, OK, but how? I thought he'd been sent the message telling him to come the other day,¬” Misato said, confusion in her voice.

“It would appear that he requires some persuasion that I neither have the capacity nor the time for. Use whatever methods you deem necessary,” the bearded man said before hanging up the handset.


@@@@@


In her office, Misato Katsuragi pondered her latest task.

“Just who is the Third Child?” she asked herself. “And why isn't he here in Tokyo-3 already?”

Remembering the old saying that a problem shared is a problem halved, Misato left to find her friend Ritsuko Akagi.

Strolling down the corridors of NERV, the purple-haired woman smiled and winked playfully at the men she encountered. 'Yeah, still got it,' she smirked to herself.

Knocking on the door to Ritsuko's office, Misato announced her presence and opened the door.

“What can I do for you, Misato?” the blonde scientist asked, not looking up from her computer.

“Well, I've just been asked by the Commander to get the Third Child to here to NERV, but I have no details about him. I mean, aside from the fact that he's a he,” Misato answered.

“The Third Child's name is Shinji Ikari,” Ritsuko said as she leaned in to get a better look at the screen. “The last I heard was that he lives somewhere near Osaka and that we sent the official letter requesting his presence here the three days ago.”

“Yeah, well, apparently it didn't work and I've been asked to get him to come here.”

Ritsuko finally turned to face Misato. “I guess that Shinji isn't as no-nonsense as his father.”

“Wait, Shinji is the Commander's son?” the Captain asked.

“You sound surprised that a woman could be interested in someone like the Commander, Misato.”

“Well, yeah, he's so gruff and unfriendly,” Misato commented.

Deciding that it wasn't a good idea to mention her minor attraction to Gendo Ikari at that particular moment, Ritsuko merely shrugged. “Then perhaps you should send Shinji a more personal message? Say that you're looking forward to meeting someone so important. Include a photo, that should make him more enthusiastic about coming here.”

“What kind of photo?”

The blonde rubbed her neck. This was the part that called for finesse and subtlety, and these were not something Misato Katsuragi was known for.

“I would say something that you would have shown Kaji back in college, but then I remembered coming home to see a video camera set up in your bedroom. Maybe something a little flirty, but nothing that you wouldn't mind been put up in the break room,” the scientist suggested.

“So something like this?” Misato asked as she posed over Ritsuko's desk, angling her body to show that she had curves in all the right places.

“Yes, but something a little more informal. It'll show Shinji that you're not too authoritarian and bossy.”

“I am not bossy,” the Captain huffed.

Ritsuko allowed herself a small smirk. “If you say so, Misato, but my point was that I think that a friendly approach will work better with Shinji, rather than the 'do this, do that' way the Commander operates.”


@@@@@


Shinji wasn't sure if he should have been surprised by the appearance of another letter from NERV as his father had always been a focused and dogged person.

What was a surprise was that this new letter was more personal and friendly than the first computer generated message.

This Misato Katsuragi person seemed nice enough, but she still wanted him to go to Tokyo-3 to work with his father.

And that was not something the teenager was prepared to do at the moment.

'Wait, she said that there was something to help convince me to come to see her...' Shinji thought. He searched the envelope for this added bonus, but all he could find was the same rail pass that he'd sent back to NERV.

As Misato had been thoughtful enough to include her direct dial number in the message, Shinji decided to give it a call and tell her not to bother him any more.


@@@@@


“Good afternoon, Captain Katsuragi speaking.”

“¬Hello, my name is Shinji Ikari. You sent me a letter,¬” the timid, yet annoyed voice said.

“Oh, hello, Shinji-kun,” Misato said, giving the phone call her full attention. “What can I do for you?”

“¬Please stop trying to contact me. I don't want anything to do with my father or his work,¬” Shinji said. “¬I don't care what you thought was going to convince me to go to Tokyo-3, but all that matters is that I'm not going.¬”

“But...” the Captain trailed off as she realised that she'd left out the photo she'd meant to send to Shinji to convince him to pay her a visit. She grimaced but managed to avoid cursing. “But we need you here, Shinji-kun.”

“¬Really?¬” the teenager asked sarcastically. “¬And what can a fourteen year old boy do to help you, a multinational organisation? You know, what with your huge budget and the finest minds on the planet?¬”

“I... well, it's complicated,” Misato said. “It'd be easier if you came here so we can show you what you need to do.”

“¬Not going to happen. Leave me alone.¬”

“W-why?”

“¬Because I don't want anything to do with anything to do with my father,¬” Shinji spat contemptuously. “¬For the last time, don't try to contact me.¬”

Misato blinked as the dial tone filled her ear. “But...”

Replacing the handset, the Captain let out a sigh. “Great, now what do I do?”

Leaning back in her chair, Misato looked up to the ceiling for inspiration. “This was Ritsuko's idea....”


@@@@@


Ritsuko Akagi rubbed her face as her friend finished explaining the situation with Shinji Ikari.

“Just how can you manage to mess up something as simple as 'be nice to a kid'?” she asked.

“Hey, didn't you hear the bit about how he doesn't want anything to do his father?” Misato snapped. “So what do you suggest?”

“The only option we have left: a personal visit,” Ritsuko answered. “And if we can't convince him to come with us, we bring him by force.”

“Wait, are you saying that we should kidnap someone? Damn, Ritsuko, I didn't realise you were so cold.”

“Before you start going into a rant where you take the moral high ground, Captain Katsuragi, you might consider why Shinji is needed here. He has been selected as a pilot for Unit-01. Not by choice, but by necessity, Misato. If we could have used a soldier we would have selected a soldier for the task,” the bottle-blonde rebuked. “I would much rather have him agree to this, but if he doesn't do this, we will all die.”

“Well, yes that's true, but...” Misato trailed off as she failed to come up with a suitable argument for Ritsuko's logic. “Ok, so how are we going to bring him here? It's not like we can bundle him into a van at the school gates.”

“No, this plan will require a little bit more subtlety, Misato. A VTOL, too,” Ritsuko said. “We'll get him tomorrow. I'll requisition us a VTOL, you bring your gun, your ID and make sure you dress nice.”

“Whatever you say, Ritsuko. Whatever you say.”


@@@@@


The following day, Misato was wearing her favourite dress. It was a sleek black number, with white trim. The cut of the dress was such that it hugged her figure, accentuating the Captain's ample breasts while the hem was high enough to show off her legs.

Taking off her sunglasses in a casual fashion, she asked her friend what she thought with a smile.

“Do I look nice enough for you, Ritsuko?”

“You do indeed, Misato,” the bottle-blonde nodded. She was dressed in a dark blue skirt and matching fitted jacket. There was a white trim around the collar and lapels.

While Misato looked sexy in her clothes, Ritsuko looked classy and business like in hers.

“Have you brought your gun with you, Misato?”

“I thought you were joking about that, Ritsuko!” the Captain insisted.

“No, but as luck would have it, I've got one for you here,” Ritsuko said as she opened her bag. She pulled out a small automatic pistol. “Take this and hide it in your handbag.”

“Are you sure this is necessary, Ritsuko?” Misato asked as she examined the handgun. It was a Walther PPK; Misato removed the magazine and saw that it was loaded with live rounds. “You really mean business, don't you, Ritsuko?”

The scientist sighed. “Look, Misato, I don't want anyone to get hurt and I certainly don't want to hurt the person we're trying to bring back to pilot Unit-01. In fact, I'd prefer it if it we don't even mention that we've got it.”

“Then why bring it with us?”

“Because the threat of violence can work just as well as violence itself. The psychological impact of you firing a round off into the air will make him come with us if our words fail,” Ritsuko explained.

Misato was clearly unconvinced, but Ritsuko's next words mollified her somewhat.

“Besides, I've also got a stun-gun and something that we can use to knock him out. We won't even have to shoot him in the leg.”

“Let's just go and get this over with,” the Captain sighed.


@@@@@


Shinji Ikari looked up in confusion when the Principal arrive at his classroom.

“Ikari-kun, there are some important people here to see you. Please come with me,” the grey-haired man instructed.

“Who is it?” Shinji asked.

“Captain Katsuragi of NERV.”

“Crap,” the young Ikari sighed. “I suppose that I'll have to tell them to leave me alone in person.”

That comment had several students wonder what it was that they wanted with someone as ordinary as Shinji Ikari. It made no sense for NERV, the most important non-governmental organisation in the world to want to speak with someone who struggled to reach the dizzying heights of mediocrity.

“Please hurry up, Ikari-kun, they don't have all day,” the Principal chided.

“Yeah, yeah,” Shinji muttered as he strode out to the Principal's Office.


@@@@@


Upon approaching the Principal's office, Shinji was unsure of what to expect. He wondered who was here to see him.

Was it some nameless man in a black suit, the sort of man who would make veiled threats to his person or family?

Not that he cared much for his family. And if file on him had his school and home address, it should certainly have that piece of information included.

Or perhaps it was his father, finally ready to start treating him like a human being, rather than some family secret that brought shame on everyone even remotely related to him.

Then the Principal opened the door to reveal two attractive women sitting with their backs to the door.

“Please accept my apologies for the delay, ladies,” the Principal smiled broadly as his beady eyes sweeping over their shapely bodies. “This is Shinji Ikari.”

“Ah, we meet at last, Shinji-kun,” Misato winked playfully. “You've been playing quite the game with us.”

“There's no game, I'm not going with you,” Shinji insisted.

“Shinji,” Ritsuko said, her voice stern, “you're quite right, this is not a game. We're not here for our health. We're here to take you back with us to Tokyo-3.”

“Do your ears even work?” the teenager demanded. “How many times do I have to tell you that I'm not going to Tokyo-3?”

“We're not leaving without you,” the blonde stated. “Your choices are to walk out of here with us or we carry your unconscious body out.” She stood up. “I don't care how much you hate your father, you've got to do this.”

“Or what?” Shinji sneered.

“We'll all die,” Ritsuko said, her hand casually slipping inside her bag.

“We all have to die sometime,” the teenager countered, not seeing Ritsuko approaching with the stun-gun primed. “AARGH”

Shinji fell to the floor like a sack of potatoes.

“W-What are you doing?” the Principal demanded as Ritsuko exchanged the stun-gun for the prepared dose of sedative.

Misato was also taken aback by the blonde's actions, but knew that they might have been necessary. She pulled out the pistol. “We'll be leaving now. Thank you for your time.”

“B-but...”

“Like she said, we'll be leaving now,” Ritsuko said as she finished sedating Shinji. “Misato, help me get Shinji to the VTOL.”


@@@@@


As the VTOL sped towards Tokyo-3, Misato looked disapprovingly at her friend.

“I can’t believe we just kidnapped a kid, Ritsuko.”

The bottle blonde rolled her eyes. “Misato, we both know the stakes here. What we’re doing here is for the greater good. I don’t want to violate people’s rights, but we need to do this in order for the human race to survive.”

“But still...” the Captain protested weakly.

“Besides,” Ritsuko added, “It’s one specific person who we can’t replace with a more willing volunteer. It’s not like we’re picking on people with a different skin colour or who worship a different set of gods.”

Misato laughed sarcastically. “Oh, you should have said that we’re only ruining the life of one person, not millions. And I was thinking that the rights of the individual were the basis of civilised society.”

“Misato, we both know that if we don’t do this, we won’t have a society, civilised or otherwise.”

“That doesn’t mean I have to like it. So, when’s sleeping beauty there going to wake up?”

Ritsuko glanced at her watch. “We should have enough time to get him into a room in the medical wing. We’ll tell him that he passed out and that we needed to get him to a hospital.”

“And if he wakes up before then?” Misato asked, almost afraid of what the answer would be.

“He’ll be out until after we land, that much is certain, but if he wakes up before we get him to the medical wing, then we’ll just make something up. One of us may need to distract him with our feminine wiles,” the scientist answered.

Misato glared at her colleague as she picked up on the implication. She turned to the pilot. “How much longer until we land?”

“Half an hour,” he answered. A squadron of armed jets sped in front of the flight path of the VTOL. “Whoa, they’re in a hurry!”

The passengers flocked to the side of the VTOL and saw what the jets were intending to intercept.

“W-what is that thing, Ritsuko?”

“What we brought Shinji here to stop, Misato.”


@@@@@


Thanks to his relatively low bodyweight, Shinji was taking longer to wake up than Ritsuko had foreseen. Not wanting to alienate the boy further, the scientist decided that a wet cloth rather than slap to the face was the best way to rouse him.

“Wha?” Shinji asked, straining to get away from the cold, damp fabric.

“It’s about time you woke up, Shinji-kun,” Ritsuko sighed. “We were beginning to get worried.”

“Why was I asleep?” the teenager asked, trying to get his bearings. “Where are we?”

“You passed out with excitement,” the bottle-blonde lied. “We told you that you’re going to pilot this, the Evangelion.”

Shinji followed where Ritsuko’s hand was pointing, to a large purple shadow.

Misato hit the lights, showing the ominous visage. “See, isn’t it cool, Shinji-kun?”

“I don’t remember anyone saying about me piloting anything!” Shinji protested. “The last thing I remembered was you telling me that I had to come to Tokyo-3 and me telling you I wasn’t interested!”

“Unfortunately, your interests have been superseded, Shinji Ikari,” a male voice echoed throughout the large room.

“What? Y-you!” the teenager growled, unwilling to even feign politeness when greeting the bearded man.

It had been four years since Shinji had last spoken with his father, and the passage of time hadn’t made the teenager’s heart grow any fonder.

“You will pilot the Evangelion,” Gendo Ikari stated.

“What? Are you mad? How the hell do you expect me to pilot something I’ve never seen before?”

“All you have to do is sit in it.”

“Then you do it!” Shinji snapped. “If all you need is someone to sit in it, then why did you drag me here?!”

“Shinji-kun,” Misato said, hoping to placate the angry youth, “you have to understand that the Evangelions are on the cutting edge of man’s technical ability. Unfortunately, they have certain requirements.”

“Yes, Ritsuko nodded. “We’ve searched through the entire Japanese military, but we’ve found that only people born after the Second Impact can operate them. We’re sorry, Shinji-kun, but we need you to pilot Unit-01.”

Shinji shook his head in disbelief. “This is insane!”

“The facts are the facts,” Gendo Ikari stated. “Will you pilot Unit-01?”

“Why should I?”

There was a massive earth tremor that shook the entire geo-front.

“It’s here already?” Misato asked, turning to the Commander of NERV Japan.

“Time is running out, Shinji Ikari. Will you pilot Unit-01 or not?”

“No,” Shinji answered. He turned to leave the hangar.

“Shinji-kun, please,” Ritsuko asked politely. “I’ve got better things to do tonight than die.”

The teenager shrugged. “It’s not my fault your plan was ‘kidnap a schoolboy and make him pilot a machine he’s never seen before’.”

“Please, Shinji-kun,” the purple-haired woman asked, she took Shinji’s hand in hers. “I don’t think you understand what’s at stake here. It’s not just Tokyo-3 you’ll be saving, but the entire human race.”

“Wow. That’s...” Shinji let out a breath. “You really think I’m going to buy that? No, I’m out of here.”

Misato kept a hold of Shinji’s hand, preventing him from leaving. “We’re not lying to you, Shinji-kun, we really need your help.”

“Well, assuming that I believe what you’re telling me, why should I help you?”

“It’s the right thing to do,” Misato insisted.

“You’re lecturing me on doing the right thing? You kidnapped me!” Shinji scoffed.

“And two wrongs don’t make a right,” Ritsuko countered. “Are you going to continue to behave like a child or are you going to grow up?”

Shinji looked at the blonde in disbelief.

“If you will not pilot Unit-01, then you are of no use to us,” Gendo’s voice resonated throughout the hangar. “Dr. Akagi, prepare Unit-01 for Rei.”

“What? It took Rei weeks to synchronise with Unit-00 – we don’t have the time to set up for her!” Ritsuko protested.

“Our alternative is unusable,” the bearded man calmly replied.

A door opened and an injured girl was wheeled out on a gurney.

“Rei’s in no state to pilot an Evangelion!” Misato screamed at her superior.

“What other option do we have?”

Shinji looked at the state Rei was in. Her eye was bandaged and she was clearly in a lot of pain as she struggled to climb off the gurney.

It made him angry with himself for allowing his hatred for his father to cloud his judgement.

“Fine, I’ll do it,” the young Ikari said, shouting angrily at his father. “But just this once.”


@@@@@


“He’s been out for three days, Ritsuko,” Misato Katsuragi said to her colleague as they approached the room where Shinji Ikari was recuperating. “Are you sure he’s going to be OK?”

“Well, aside from mental and physical exhaustion, he should make a complete recovery,” the bottle blonde answered. The pair paused as they reached the door. “I’m more concerned about convincing him to keep piloting Unit-01.”

Ritsuko knocked on the door. There was no response, which caused her to cast a glance at Misato. Deciding that they needed to talk to Shinji, Ritsuko opened the door.

“Are you alright there, Shinji-kun?” she asked.

The young Ikari turned his head and glared at the two women. “Where are my clothes?”

“That’s not very friendly,” Misato chided.

“Neither was that monster I fought. I thought it was going to break my skull open,” Shinji fumed. He slowly sat up on the bed. “Now, where are my clothes? I want to get going.”

“We need to talk to you about piloting Unit-01,” Ritsuko said, dodging the teenager’s question.

“I told you that I was only doing it once. There’s nothing else to talk about.”

“You can have your clothes back when we’ve talked about your role as the pilot of Unit-01,” the faux-blonde said. “Now, clearly we need a lot of training if we’re going to get you up to speed.”

“Are you two hard of hearing or just stupid?” Shinji asked as he angrily threw off the sheets that covered his body. He swung his legs over the side of the bed and realised that he hadn’t moved for a while. “I’m leaving now, whether you give me my clothes back or not,” he explained as he moved his feet in circles to get the blood flowing again.

“You can’t just walk down the street dressed like that!” Misato protested.

“If you won’t get me my clothes, then I guess I’ll have to.”

“Please, be reasonable, Shinji-kun,” the Captain practically begged.

The teenager shook his head. “I think that I’ve been very reasonable. I replied to the first letter telling you I wasn’t interested. I phoned you up personally after the second letter.

“You came to see me in person, and I tried to tell you the same thing, but you kidnapped me. Why won’t you leave me alone?”

“Because we need you,” Ritsuko answered. “I told you that only people born after the Second Impact can pilot the Evangelions. You were selected from the few people born after the Second Impact because you have the ability to pilot. It makes you special.”

“Find someone else to be a monster’s punching bag,” Shinji huffed. He slipped off the bed and stepped towards the door. “Are you going to let me leave or not?”

“We’re sorry, Shinji-kun, but we need you to stay,” Misato said, standing firm in front of the door. She folded her arms across her chest. “We need you to help save humanity.”

“You know what? I don’t really care about people anymore,” the young Ikari shrugged.

“I see that keeping you here as a prisoner isn’t going to change that,” Ritsuko sighed. “Are you sure that there’s nothing we can do to convince you to stay and help us?”

Shinji laughed bitterly. “It’s unlikely, given that I’m prepared to jump off a bridge on principle.”

“Are you really willing to die a virgin?” Misato asked, raising an eyebrow at the partially dressed young man before her.

“Well, when you consider that I could die at any time while I’m piloting that robot you made, your point is kinda moot.”

“That’s a rather pessimistic view to have, Shinji-kun,” the Captain frowned.

“Yeah, and I have lots to be optimistic about, don’t I? I mean, it’s not like my wishes have been completely ignored, been kidnapped, forced to pilot something I’ve never seen before and been told I can’t go home.” Shinji’s neutral expression turned into a sneer. “Oh wait, that’s exactly what’s happened.”

Ritsuko reached into her labcoat pocket and pulled out her packet of cigarettes. Lighting one up, she cast a look at Shinji. “Are you willing to condemn three billion people to death over a spat with your father?”

“If he’s one of those three billion, then yes. Yes, I am.”

“But...”

“It’s no good, Misato,” Ritsuko said before taking a long drag on her cigarette. “I guess that we’re all doomed thanks to the actions of one selfish child.”

“Your argument would work better if I wasn’t still a child in the eyes of the law,” Shinji countered. “And I still don’t see why I should put myself on the line like that. Do you know what it felt like in there? It felt like my arm was being crushed!”

“But it wasn’t,” Misato countered. She reached out and rubbed Shinji’s left arm. “See, it’s perfectly fine.”

“You’re quite right there,” the increasingly belligerent youth said, shrugging his arm to get away from Misato. “And after all, mental scarring is much more preferable to physical scarring.”

“Stop being so sarcastic, Shinji,” the scientist snapped. “We get that you don’t want to do this, thank you.”

“Then why won’t you let me leave?”

“We have no choice, Shinji,” Ritsuko said, her eyes narrowing. She let out a sigh. “Look, I know that we’re going round and round in circles here. We need you to pilot the Evangelion and you want to leave as soon as possible. If you get your way, you’re happy but we all die.

“If we get our way, you’re unhappy, but we all get to live a bit longer. Are you absolutely, positively sure that there’s nothing we can get you that would make you change your mind?”

Shinji closed his eyes as he took a deep breath. After a moment he opened them again and gave his answer. “Put someone else in charge of NERV Japan.”

“What?” Misato asked.

“Get rid of my father and I’ll help you,” the teenager clarified. “I don’t care who you put in charge, but keep him away from me and I’ll do what you want.”

Ritsuko finished her cigarette. “I don’t know how likely that change is going to be, but I’ll let people know what your condition is.”


@@@@@


Gendo Ikari looked suitably unimpressed with the demand his son had issued in order for his continued assistance. It had taken him several years of hard work and countless sacrifices to get NERV to its current state.

To just leave NERV as Shinji had demanded would jeopardise everything and that was not an acceptable condition.

‘I had thought that the boy would have been more malleable,’ the bearded man mused. He looked at his second in commander and former teacher. “Well, Sensei, what do you think?”

“Without Shinji piloting Unit-01, I don’t see how Instrumentality can occur in the controlled way we planned,” the grey-haired man answered. His brow furrowed as he considered the effect of the Commander stepping down.

“An outsider is too great of a risk,” Ritsuko spoke up. “Too many questions would be asked, too many secrets risk being uncovered. I see one solution: Promotions.”

“Details, Dr. Akagi,” Gendo instructed, “I’m intrigued as to your solution.”

The bottle-blonde lit up a cigarette. “We all agree that we need your guidance and influence, yes? Well, what if you were to take up the role of a liaison between NERV Japan and either the UN or the Japanese government? You would be out of Tokyo-3 for enough of the time for it not to bother Shinji, but since the job is effectively gardening leave, you’d be able to run NERV from afar with your successor being able to handle the day-to-day running.”

“That sounds like a good idea,” Kozo Fuyutsuki nodded.

“I thought you’d like that idea, Sensei, since you’re the next in line for this seat,” the Commander smirked. “Still, this would help keep certain things under wraps. Akagi, I want you to try once more to convince him using other methods. Use whatever it takes, but if we’re still at this impasse in three days, we’ll start to make these ‘changes’.”

“Yes, sir,” Ritsuko nodded, she left the two men alone to continue their discussion.

“Sensei, do you really think that you being the one to sortie the Evangelions will be enough to convince Shinji to stay?”

“It’s worth a try, Ikari, it’s worth a try.”


@@@@@


As Ritsuko discussed Shinji’s demands with his father, Misato had taken it upon herself to build up a rapport with the sullen teenager.

“So, what sort of music do you like, Shinji?”

“What do you care?” Shinji asked, interrupting his pacing.

“Well, we got off on the wrong foot, Shinji,” Misato winced. “I was hoping that we could be friends.”

“Why?” the teen asked. “Seriously, do you think that I’m going to forget about the fact that you kidnapped me?”

The purple haired woman sighed. “You don’t understand, Shinji.”

Shinji moved to the door and growled when he noticed it was locked. “And I suppose that in five minutes you’re going to be able to make me understand and I’ll agree to everything you say?”

“That would be nice, but no, I don’t expect that to happen, Shinji. Listen, I know about traumatic experiences. You’re talking to the only surviving witness of the Second Impact.”

That got Shinji’s attention. “Y-you were in Antarctica? How far away were you from the meteorite impact?”

The door opened and Ritsuko silently entered, noticed only by Misato.

“It… it wasn’t a meteorite,” Misato answered in a quiet voice. “I… I can’t really explain what it was, but it definitely wasn’t a rock from space.”

“Then why does everyone say that it was?”

“Because the truth would cause a greater panic,” the scientist answered, surprising the teenager.

Shinji turned to face Ritsuko. “What did he say?”

“He was busy,” Ritsuko lied. “He’s been called away for a few days, but I managed to let him know what your condition was. He said he’ll give you an answer when he gets back in three days.”

“So I’m going to be a prisoner for the next three days?”

“You don’t have to stay here, you could stay with Misato until you get an answer,” Ritsuko suggested.

“Hey, don’t I get a say in this?” the Captain protested, more out of a lack of consultation than outright rejection of the idea.

“She’s got a point,” the young Ikari nodded. “Unless that’s just how NERV operates: ‘Do as we say or we’ll shoot’.”

“NERV does not threaten people to get what it wants like a schoolyard bully,” Ritsuko sighed. She cast a look at Misato that told her to go along until they had a chance to talk in private. “I realise that it looks that way from your perspective, but we do try to be reasonable.”

“So, what do you say, Shinji?” Misato asked. “Three days in here or you can stay at my place until we decide what’s going to happen?”

“You changed your tune pretty quickly,” Shinji commented. He thought about the situation for a moment. “But I am getting pretty sick of looking at these walls. Ok, I’ll stay with you until my father gives me his answer in three days.”

“Excellent stuff, now I’ll get your clothes brought down,” Ritsuko smiled. “Misato, I need you to clarify a few things in your report.


@@@@@


Back in her office, Ritsuko closed the door and calmly explained a version of the situation to Misato.

“So basically, we’ve got three days to convince Shinji to sign up to be the pilot of Unit-01?” Misato surmised. “I don’t mean to sound mean, but that’s kinda what we’ve been trying to do.”

“True enough, but you might remember that I mentioned one of us might have to use her feminine wiles to convince him. That’s why I suggested that he stay with you.”

“Look Ritsuko, I appreciate that I have a reputation, but-”

“I’m not telling you to sleep with him, Misato,” Ritsuko interrupted, hoping to calm her friend down. “But we need him to form a bond with someone here in Tokyo-3.”

“And you think that it should be me? He doesn’t like either of us, Ritsuko.”

The faux-blonde sighed as she nodded in agreement. “I know, Misato, but I think that we could pull this off if you can distract him from his father for long enough.”

“I can’t do this alone, Ritsuko,” said the purple-haired woman. “Not only is my apartment a mess, but he’ll see through any plan I come up with to bond with him.”

“Brilliance is such a double-edged sword,” Ritsuko sighed theatrically as she held her temples. “Ok, I’ll get my grandmother to look after my cats and I’ll move in with you for three days.”

“Thanks, Ritsuko.”

“You say that now,” the scientist said as she reached for her cigarettes.


@@@@@


Shinji sat on the bed waiting for Ritsuko and Misato to arrive. He’d been told that his clothes would be delivered, but there had been no sign of them.

He glanced at the clock and saw that it had been eight minutes since he’d been left alone.

“What’s taking them so long?” he asked himself.

Eventually, Shinji slid of the bed and started to walk around the small hospital room. The teenager’s mind went through the possible reasons for the delay.

‘They forgot to get me my clothes. They’re testing me; to see if I’m willing to sit here until they get back. They’re lying to me about me getting out of here.’

“Wait, is the door actually locked?”

He strode purposefully to the door and tried the handle.

It was unlocked and Shinji found himself pondering the merits of leaving the room and finding his own way out of the building against waiting for someone who might never arrive.

“Shinji?” a female voice called out.

The teenager opened the door further to see that Ritsuko and Misato were only a metre away.

“Where are your clothes?” Ritsuko asked.

“I don’t know, you were going to get them brought here,” Shinji answered.

“Damn it,” the bottle blonde cursed as she reached into her pocket for her mobile phone. “Hey, it’s Akagi here, where are Shinji’s clothes?”

“¬Sempai, I… I think there’s been a mistake. The Commander ordered them incinerated and I just got back.¬”

“That’s not what I wanted to hear, Maya,” Ritsuko hissed into her phone just at the call was dropped. “What? Stupid…”

Further curses were muttered by the scientist as Misato laughed nervously and tried make light of the situation.

“You know how temperamental technology can be.”

“Yeah, some days it can save your life, others make you wish you were dead,” the young Ikari deadpanned. “Now, where are my clothes or are you going to make me walk around like this?”

“Well, you did say that you’d walk home dressed like that if you had to,” Misato countered. “Or are you suffering from a sudden attack of modesty?”

“Whatever, since you lost my clothes, you can buy me new ones. Let’s get going, I’ve had enough of this place already,” Shinji sighed. When no-one moved, he added in a tired voice, “Lead the way or stare at my backside, I don’t care what you do, just get us out of here.”

“Right, sorry about that, Shinji,” Ritsuko said. She’d reigned in some of her frustrations at the Commander’s seemingly irrational order. ‘Just what is he planning?’ “Follow me, Shinji.”

The trio made their way to the car park, with Misato wondering just how much Shinji had been joking about wearing that open-backed gown as he walked out of Tokyo-3. She glanced down and saw the way the teenager’s buttocks were tensing and relaxing as he walked behind Ritsuko.

‘Hmm, not bad… No, I shouldn’t think of him like that!’ the Captain berated herself. ‘Still, if Ritsuko is serious about trying to convince him to stay, I can think of worse people to sleep with, like his father…’

When they reached an elevator, Ritsuko hit the button and turned around to see the contemplative look on Misato’s face.

‘I don’t know if it’s a good thing or a bad thing that Misato’s warming up to this idea. Still, if Shinji likes her, then it should make things easier.’

“Misato, unfortunately, I need a place to stay for the next few days. You don’t mind if I crash at your place, do you?”

“What? Oh, you need a place to stay? Of course you can stay at my place, Ritsuko,” the purple-haired woman said as the doors opened.

Gendo Ikari stood impassively, glaring at his son.

It was intimidating for the two women, but from Shinji’s point of view, it was nothing short of a betrayal.

“Are you still here? Well, then I guess I don’t have to be,” the belligerent teen sneered before heading off to a nearby fire exit.

“Wait, Shinji,” Misato said, rushing after him.

“Did you really order Shinji’s clothes to be burnt?”

“His things are being sent here,” the bearded man replied. “I know that you will be able to do what it takes to succeed in your task.”

“But…” the faux-blonde protested.

“I have faith in your abilities and resourcefulness, Dr. Akagi,” Gendo said as he hit the button to close elevator doors. “I will be disappointed if my faith was misplaced.”

The door closed, cutting off any further discussion.

“Damn it,” Ritsuko cursed. She took a deep breath and walked briskly to where Misato had caught up with Shinji.


@@@@@


“Shinji, wait,” Misato said as she grabbed hold the teenager’s arm.

“Leave me alone.”

“Please…”

Shinji turned around to see Ritsuko approach.

“Shinji, your father was just checking up on something before he left,” the bottle blonde lied.

“Doesn’t matter, I’m leaving this place,” the teenager shrugged.

“What if I said he was concerned about you?” Ritsuko asked, hoping her ploy would pay off.

“Hahahaha! You almost had me going there,” Shinji laughed. He sobered up. “I know he doesn’t give a damn about me. And I don’t care about him.”

“Don’t be so cold, Shinji-kun,” Misato said. “It’s not right for someone so young to be so bitter.”

“No. We are not going to go round and round with this stupid thing. For the last time, I don’t want to be here, I shouldn’t be in this position. Go and find someone else to do what you want!” Shinji snapped. “I’m leaving Tokyo-3 and I want you to leave me alone.”

Ritsuko grimaced as she realised that everything that had been so meticulously planned was going down toilet thanks to one teenager’s hatred of his father.

“Please, Shinji…”

“What? You want me to stay here so you can lie to me again and make me risk my life for someone who couldn’t give a damn about me?” the young Ikari asked. “And why would I agree to that?”

“I give a damn about you,” Misato protested.

Shinji gave the purple-haired woman disapproving look. “You kidnapped me.”

“It was necessary! There was no-one else who could pilot the Evangelion!” Misato insisted.

“Poor planning on your part doesn’t constitute an emergency on mine. What would you have done if I’d died piloting? You’d be in the same position you are now – looking for a new pilot. I’m leaving now, don’t try to contact me again.”

With that, Shinji made his way to the nearest exit and started to walk barefoot down the streets of Tokyo-3.

“Well, shit, what are we going to do now, Ritsuko?”

“Chase after him, you fool!” Ritsuko said as she broke out into a jog after the partially dressed youth.


@@@@@


The unfamiliar layout of the NERV medical facility hampered Shinji’s escape attempt. He scanned the ceiling and walls for signs indicating where the exits were, but found that he was going around in circles.

Before he could let out his frustration with a curse upon his father’s name, the teenager was ambushed by Ritsuko.

“Shinji, please, stop this,” the scientist panted. The exertion clearly wasn’t agreeing with her. “When I spoke to your father, he told me he was just about leave; I didn’t expect to see him just now either.”

Misato appeared behind Shinji. “There you are, Shinji-kun. I think we’ve had enough running around for one day, don’t you?”

When the surly teenager failed to respond, the Captain put her arm around his shoulders. “How about we get something to eat?”

“What makes you think that I would trust you?” Shinji asked, clearly uncomfortable with Misato’s proximity. “With anything? You can’t even get me my clothes!”

“It’s complicated, Shinji-kun,” Ritsuko insisted, having regained her breath. “There was a mix up and your clothes were incinerated.”

“You really know how to fill someone with confidence, don’t you? Seriously, do you have to go away on courses to be this incompetent or is it natural talent?” the young Ikari asked bitterly. “Let me out of here before I throw myself down a flight of stairs.”

“I can’t let you do that, Shinji,” the purple-haired woman said as she wrapped her arms around him, pulling him against her body.

Shinji squirmed for a moment before he realised what was pressing into his back and he blushed. “S-stop that.”

“Or what?” Misato asked teasingly, knowing full well what she was doing to the adolescent. Her left hand slithered down the front of Shinji’s gown, causing it to tent lewdly. “Oh… so that’s what’s happening… Do you really want to go? I mean, there’s so much we could do…”

Shinji whimpered.

“But not here in public, Shinji-kun,” the Captain breathed into his ear. “I’m not that sort of girl. If you want to have some fun, you’ll have to come home with me…”

“O-ok…”

Ritsuko looked at Misato with a look of conflict on her face. She disapproved of the way her friend was flirting with Shinji like that, but she knew that it was important that Shinji agreed to pilot Unit-01.

“Let’s get going, Misato.”

“Wait, what are my neighbours going to say if they see Shinji walk into my place dressed like this?”

“Hang on, I’ve got this,” Ritsuko said as she pulled out her phone. “Hyuga? It’s Dr. Akagi here, Something happened with Shinji’s clothes so I need to borrow a spare uniform off you. Don’t ask, I don’t have time to explain, just drop it off at my office now.”


@@@@@


Because Ritsuko decided that it would be best if she and Misato gave their attempts to persuade Shinji to pilot Unit-01 a rest for a while, the car journey to Misato’s apartment was a silent one.

Shinji sat in the back of the Captain’s car, dressed in an ill-fitting uniform. He looked out at the city he’d saved.

A small part of him was impressed with his achievement. But that was almost completely drowned out by two things; the fact that he couldn’t remember doing anything to fight the monster and the way he’d been manipulated into piloting.

“Here we are,” Misato said as she stopped her car in her designated parking space.

Ritsuko would have been tempted to make a snide comment about the Captain’s driving and she had a prize zinger ready, but decided against insulting her co-worker.

‘We need to cultivate a friendly atmosphere’ was the theme for the next few days.

“So, what now?” Shinji asked as he closed the passenger door.

“I was thinking dinner followed by a few beers,” Misato said playfully.


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