Ranma ½ Senpai: A Story of Good Friends
- Thread starter The Ero-Sennin
- Start date
The ONLY thing that I found less than enjoyable about this (especially in the most recent updates) was a nagging concern that the "hopefully interesting OCs" I am anticipating trying to figure out as the story progresses may turn out instead to be some anachronistic, tonally incompatible crossover characters I have never heard of, which in the case of this particular author is likely to involve obnoxious fourth-wall chainsawing and/or hipsterism, possibly combined with gratuitous multicrosses that do not improve anything about the story but do show off how many media franchises the author is familiar with (seriously, that got old 15 years ago—though please note that I do not know whether the Sage is known to actually perpetrate this particular offense, as the aforementioned obnoxiously obtrusive hipsterism has always tended to put me off his otherwise excellent writing in the past, but in my experience elsewhere, it tends to coincide with extensive fourth-wall shenanigans).
That detail aside, which really only has anything to do with vague dread based upon the author's past works, this is a good read so far!
That detail aside, which really only has anything to do with vague dread based upon the author's past works, this is a good read so far!
Oh, I was already pretty sure your girls were OCs; they are a different flavour of awesome than I usually see in professionally published material (*disclaimer: I don't actually know that many series well enough to recognize characters from them by a written description). I was referring to the character in the last snippet who was calling out the Gambling King, and… well… When I mentioned OCs, plural, in my prior post, I was somehow labouring under the mistaken belief that there had also been a scene posted in this thread involving Ryoga confronting a character I did not recognize; however, I appear to have been completely wrong about that. Sorry! My mistake.
I did actually notice the significant stylistic adjustment you made, in pretty much stopping the fourth-wall breakage outright when our fellow TFFers spoke up about it. That was very accommodating of you, I appreciated it a lot, and though completely inadvertent, it was embarrassingly poor behaviour on my part to post about your writing as though you had not done so at all. In my defence, my memory is more than somewhat underwhelming, and I honestly had not realized just how thoroughly you had made that change until I reread the entire thread today in preparation for writing this post with, hopefully, a greatly reduced sticking-my-foot-in-my-mouth rate.
I did actually notice the significant stylistic adjustment you made, in pretty much stopping the fourth-wall breakage outright when our fellow TFFers spoke up about it. That was very accommodating of you, I appreciated it a lot, and though completely inadvertent, it was embarrassingly poor behaviour on my part to post about your writing as though you had not done so at all. In my defence, my memory is more than somewhat underwhelming, and I honestly had not realized just how thoroughly you had made that change until I reread the entire thread today in preparation for writing this post with, hopefully, a greatly reduced sticking-my-foot-in-my-mouth rate.
Disclaimer: The following is a fan-written parody. Ranma ½ is property of Rumiko Takahashi, Studio Deen, Shogakukan, Viz Media, and Madman Entertainment. Support the official release, okay?
Senpai
A Ranma ½ Story
Chapter 5/?
For all the theatrics of the morning, the rest of the school day went by almost entirely uneventfully. Almost entirely, because by lunch, the newly assigned Furinkan Student Council had to be fitted for their new uniforms, the first of what would be sweeping aesthetical changes to the student body of Furinkan High School. After having a look at the new digs, Ranma decided that a school uniform wouldn’t be too bad to wear. Kodachi had a sense of style, or at the very least enough fashion designers on her payroll to simulate a sense of style.
Speaking of Kodachi, Ranma was fairly convinced that he was developing a type in violent/evil/crazy chicks because of her… or perhaps because for the rest of the day she walked around in a leotard that looked more painted on than worn. That wasn’t to say that the other girls he knew so far weren’t lacking. Akane was built like an MMA brawler but in all the right ways, Katie was tall and slender but had flexibility rivalling Kodachi, and Nabiki easily had the most-banging body he’d seen since Misao and himself in the mirror as a girl.
Nice as the scenery was, though, he was still pretty annoyed about being engaged to someone he didn’t know because his old man wanted to mooch off the Tendo family for a bit. There was also the issue of his curse, which he at least wanted a way to reverse if his job as an internet personality didn’t pan.
It was going to, he had no idea how much.
Speaking of his job, there was the matter of making sure his old man got cut out of it as much as possible. Last thing he wanted was his Pop going around acting like he had something to be proud of with these shenanigans–in addition to making sure that he didn’t start living comfortably off his hard work.
“Hey, Katie,” he said to her as the foursome walked from the school and in the direction of the Tendo Dojo. Ranma wasn’t a rude douchebag, he was going to meet the rest of the Tendos before he went right back over to Misao’s to avoid being roped any further into the engagement.
“Yeah?” She replied.
“Think you can help me set up like a bank account or something? I don’t want my old man getting his hands on my income.”
Katie would find that weird, if meeting Ranma didn’t involve driving her heel into the top of Genma’s head at high speed after he beat his child over the head with a road sign. While one of them was a panda and the other a girl, because the panda was a dumbass.
“Shouldn’t be too hard, Misao hooked me up, she’ll do the same for you,” Katie said. “You really want him cut out of your cash, huh?”
“I don’t want him to get a single yen,” Ranma said.
As if he’d heard that, Genma was suddenly tearing across the backyard of the Tendo home, making a straight line for Ranma’s location.
“Club treasurer, huh?” Akane asked Nabiki. “That’ll be a comfortable gig for you.”
Nabiki agreed, especially once she got a look at the budget. The last time she saw that many zeroes line up, they were fighting to ask her sister out. “IT, engineering, and computer clubs, too. Soon as I’m done knocking this out of the park, I’ve got my foot in the door of every economics school in Tokyo.”
She eyed Akane, seeing that she was now carrying a shinai of her own on her back, and a bokken on her hip. “What about you, Kendo Club President? What else did she give you?”
“Girl’s athletics and the other non-athletic clubs, though Kodachi’s responsible for the Gymnastics Clubs.” Akane then hooked a thumb at Ranma. “Ranma’s pretty much in charge of all the Boy’s Athletics. And he’s head of the school’s karate club.”
Ranma folded his arms and nodded.
Nabiki then looked over at Katie. “What about you? Auto club? Shooting club?”
“Discipline committee,” Katie said, pounding her fists together. “I’m the one who busts heads if people act out.”
“When Kuno gets back, he’s going to be in for such a heartbreak,” Nabiki said, “And you know what? I’m fine with that.”
“Sheesh! I gotta meet this Kuno guy, just to see how bad he is for myself,” Ranma then spoke up.
“No you don’t,” Akane, Nabiki, and Katie said as one. This would prove prophetic.
At that moment, a large white blur fell from above, aiming not for Akane, Katie, or Nabiki, but for Ranma. Looking up, Ranma was quick to cross his arms and block the massive overhead chop Genma brought down upon his head. A shockwave spread out from Ranma’s braced feet, followed by the audible, rocky crunch of the sidewalk fracturing underneath him.
“You got a lot of nerve, trying to make a fool of me!" He bellowed.
“I don't have to try to make a fool out of you, pops,” Ranma replied, quickly lashing out with a crescent kick that made his old man back off so they could throw down properly. “You do all the hard work for me!”
Genma adopted a fighting stance of his own after landing. “Don’t think you can just run off and do what you want!”
“I know I can, because I already am!” Ranma said.
“Well I’m your father and you’re going to listen to me good when I say that you’re not picking up this internet gig!” Genma declared as he attacked again, unleashing a barrage of punches, chops and other strikes that Ranma quickly began to counter while returning his own blows.
“Why? Cuz I gotta be a girl while I do it?!” Ranma fired back as he broke the barrage and attempted a spin-kick that Genma smartly dodged.
“Because you know what’s going to happen if word gets out about your damn curse!” Genma yelled back as he swung a punch down for his son’s jaw as he came back around. “No one’s going to take you seriously as a man, ever!”
He missed, because Ranma dove, tumbled between his legs, and hopped right back up on the other side of him, turning around quick and bouncing from one foot to the other.
“You mean the curse-” Ranma dodged another punch when Genma attacked “-that I got-” He avoided another one “-because you ignored the guide?!”
Katie clenched her hand into a fist, and her green eyes narrowed. She just remembered that was a thing.
He stopped Genma’s punch for his face with a kick and then moved it aside to go on the offensive, his blows being smartly defeated by Genma despite their incredible force.
“You don’t want me to make money off this stupid curse! You don’t want me to go back to China to get it cured!” Ranma shouted as he blocked another kick from Genma, his hair blown back by the displaced air. “What do you want from me?!”
“To join the schools!” Genma shouted as he put more force behind his leg, and pushed Ranma back. “That’s all you need to do! Not running around showing off your goods online so people might question if you’re even a man or not!”
Ranma recoiled, before he bristled. “I’m a man! It doesn’t matter what I’ve got in my pants!” He reassumed his fighting stance. “Or on my chest!”
That just made Genma downright surly. "Ungrateful child! You have yet to see the true horror of-”
Katie’s kick connected to the side of Genma's soft head, and he went rocketing into the nearest most adjacent wall–which happened to be the front of the clinic of one Doctor Ono Tofu. The idiot even managed to stand up, dust himself off, take a deep breath and step out of the mess he'd made - but then a flowerpot landed on his head, causing him to land face down on a dropped ice cream cone.
Ranma lowered his hands, seeing the rather embarrassing, but hilarious display. “… 8.5 out of 10.”
“Gimme a second,” Katie said as she got ready.
Genma immediately got back up, pointing at her. “What the hell was that for?! And who are-?!”
Katie jumped and dove for him, prompting Genma to look up at her to see the angle of her attack. Except that this was what Katie was expecting in the first place, because she had deliberately jumped with her back to the sun. Genma was only momentarily blinded by the sun, because Katie’s knee provided all the shade he would need.
Akane and Nabiki both winced from the sheer force that Genma hit the ground after Katie had hit him. Landing next to the second Genma-shaped imprint in the ground, she dusted off her hands, and then her right knee.
“10 out of 10,” Ranma said flatly.
Genma, groaning, looked up as Katie stepped closer to him while speaking, “I don’t know where you think you are, but here in the civilized world we don’t start shit unless we want to get hit.”
“Hey Pop, you’ve met Katie, remember?” Ranma asked. "Her foot disagreed with the back of your head over the whole you taking me by force to the Tendos."
Getting back up, Genma rubbed the back of his head and glared at Katie. “Do you have a problem with how I raise my son, young lady?"
Katie glared at the man, feeling as if something stupid was bound to happen if she let him go unchecked. “If you have to ask, you clearly aren’t as smart as you think you are.”
Genma’s glare intensified, as he prepared to strike the impudent girl down. “Well to that, young lady, I’ve got something to say-”
He should have just attacked, as Katie’s jumping knee sent him flying over the clinic and out of sight, even parting a cloud over head and causing a twinkle in the sky.
“Dead.” Katie declared, making a throat slashing gesture. “Get the fuck out of here.”
“That’s a definite ten.” Akane said, looking at Nabiki with an arched brow.
“9.9, a point off for not breaking the sound barrier.” Nabiki commented, looking over at Ranma. “You keeping your score?”
“I’m biased but anyone who wallops my pop into the atmosphere deserves a ten.” Ranma said, nodding a little. They definitely had to finish that spar soon.
“Oh my, what is going on out here?” the owner of the clinic, the aforementioned Ono Tofu said, emerging from his office to conveniently miss the assault that broke one of his walls.
“Doctor Tofu!” Akane yelped, though she managed to control her usual blushing reaction to him.
He looked down at the Genma-shaped hole in the ground.. “It looks like a grown man fell quite a far ways and hit the sidewalk.” He then looked at the similar imprint on the front of his clinic. “And then in the wall.”
Turning, he scrutinized the group, looking immediately past Katie and Ranma, his calm gaze falling upon Akane.
“Did you do this, Akane-chan?” Tofu asked, his tone neutral and not as accusatory as the question. Akane recoiled, looking a bit hurt regardless of lack of intent behind it.
Katie didn’t like the implications of that question and decided to relieve Akane from the spotlight. “Hey Doc, you don’t have to look at the first person to speak and act like they did it. I did it.”
Akane breathed a sigh of relief and shot Katie a look of thanks. Nabiki, having hoped Akane would make a fool of herself and push herself out of Ranma’s favor, frowned slightly to herself.
“Yeah man,” Ranma said, deciding to back up Akane. “If you can’t look around and take a guess better than just shoving your finger everywhere, then you should keep it to yourself before someone takes exception to it.”
Tofu, taken aback by the double remonstration, studied Katie first and recognized her. That wild animal girl that became Akane’s friend a few weeks ago. He then looked at Ranma and found he didn’t know the boy. “I don’t know you, do I?”
“I just arrived in town the other day, so odds are good you don’t.” Ranma said, crossing his arms all boss like. “The name’s Ranma, Saotome Ranma. Remember it, you’ll be hearing it often.”
The doctor schooled his features well, but a little... something creeped into his voice. “Hmm… is that a fact?”
“Bank on it.” Ranma didn’t back down, staring the man down for a second before he snorted and looked away.
“Now, now,” Katie said, trying to defuse the strangely hostile atmosphere. “Sorry about your wall, an idiot decided he wanted to take a header into it.”
“Oh it’s no bother, damage to the clinic happens all the time.” Tofu said, doing his best to appear cheerful.
“Doctor...?” Akane whispered to herself, feeling out of sorts seeing the nice and cheerful man so... out of character from what she knew of him. Something about Ranma had set something off in the good doctor.
Nabiki saw her chance to look good and took it. “Yeah, it’s a shame but we gotta go. Ranma wanted to see the dojo and you two still got to go back to your place for business right?”
Four sets of eyes trained themselves on her and the differing reactions in each filled Nabiki with a nice sort of feeling. Akane was disbelieving that Nabiki wasn’t accelerating the issue, Ranma was all like hey I forgot about that, Katie was neutral with some kind of hidden emotion and the good doctor was… annoyed? Weird.
Anyway, that seemed to break the tension as Tofu reluctantly nodded. “Well as long as you don’t want to destroy my office, it’s fine. Have a nice day.”
The foursome heading to the dojo all said their goodbyes and headed on their way.
Akane pulled Nabiki back for a second. “What are you doing?”
“What do you think I’m doing?” Nabiki asked, smirk evident as she didn’t try to hide her ulterior motives.
“Just watch it will you?” Akane said, glowering at her sister.
“Watch what? You eat my dust?” Nabiki returned, smirk deepening into a grin.
“Oi, come on you two!” Katie called, preventing things from going further.
“Coming!” Nabiki answered, moving to catch up with Katie and Ranma.
Akane just glared at her sister’s back for a long second, before moving along to catch up.
“I don’t like that guy,” Katie muttered of Dr, Tofu the moment they were out of earshot of the clinic.
She wasn’t out of earshot of Akane, who seemed as offended by the stance as Dr. Tofu would. “Why, Senpai? He’s always been nice…”
Until today, at least, she couldn’t understand why he seemed so irritated by Ranma. It was just a miscommunication, that was all.
Ranma had an idea. “The first thing he did when he saw the damage done, he blamed it on you.”
“Well that’s because Akane has a reputation of getting into fights,” Nabiki informed.
“So do I,” Katie and Ranma said together.
“Heck, that jerk should’ve been blaming me from the start,” Ranma added.
“On top of that, he sounded like he was making a joke,” Katie said.
Nabiki did concede to that. “That is his sense of humor when it comes to property damage. Until you guys came along, Akane pretty much was the only one who could do that kind of stuff.”
Ranma looked at Akane, impressed. “Really?”
“Once, when she was twelve, she flipped a food truck because the guy stiffed her.”
Akane seemed to brood darkly with that. “That takoyaki was awful and he didn’t give me my change.”
Nabiki nodded. “On the bright side, he’d been scamming people all day with that, so everything worked out.”
“That’s fair, then,” Katie judged. “I’ve done more than my share of dispensing justice.”
Ranma agreed as he immediately recalled his own brush with vigilantism. “Yeah, me too. There was this one jackass, a grown man, who conned my friend and a bunch of other kids out of their money by beating them in card games. I rolled him up in straw and threw him in a river.”
He failed to mention that he lost all of his own money, his Dad’s money, his Dad’s belongings, his house, and his Dad’s marriage to his Mom in the process. But since Ranma beat him up and threw him in a river, it was nothing to be concerned about, he won, that was that. Forever.
“Serves him right,” Akane said.
“Did he die?” Nabiki inquired.
Ranma just raised and dropped his shoulders. “Hell if I know, he never came back after me an’ Ucchan were done with him..”
It must have been humiliating to be beaten up by a pair of children. Katie didn’t feel even the tiniest bit of sympathy for him. “Well if he did, he earned it.”
Akane looked ahead and could see the front of the dojo coming up into view. “Well, at least we’re almost home.”
Nabiki smiled a little in that sardonic fashion that made you feel like she was having a joke at your expense but you couldn’t ever prove it. “Such as it is. I’m sure our visitors will love to see the dojo.”
Ranma’s eyes lit up at the mention of the dojo. “Wow, it’s been… years since I last stepped foot in a dojo.”
Akane smiled before she sighed. “I’d like to say it’s a proper dojo but...” She trailed off, looking rather chagrined by that.
“Daddy hasn’t taught in years.” Nabiki finished, looking just as chagrined.
Katie interrupted before Ranma could speak. “You call your dad… daddy?” She expected it out of Akane but Nabiki? It just didn’t fit.
Ranma didn’t say anything because he didn’t really know anything about Nabiki or Akane or their father for that matter. But it did sound weird that such a cold girl would use such a sweet word. And funny, but he controlled his laughter.
Nabiki glowered but refused to rise to the barb, instead choosing to turn her nose up with a rather indignant “HMPH!”
Akane giggled a little. “Anyways, it’ll be good to have you over when you need to practice.”
“And someone to practice with huh?” Nabiki asked, tone arching like her eyebrow.
Akane didn’t rise to the bait, mainly because they were there. And also because that’s what Nabiki wanted. “Well, we’re here. Is Kasumi cooking right now?”
Ranma found his spot to get back into the discussion. “Kasumi?”
“Oh right, you haven’t met her yet. She’s our older sister.” Nabiki said, suddenly not seeming as hot to trot about everything.
“She’s very nice.” Katie said, as diplomatically as she could. “You’ll like her cooking, if nothing else.”
“A real homebody huh?” Ranma asked, not sure how he felt about that.
Akane laughed nervously, deciding it was time to change the topic before things made the two of them look really bad. “Well you’ll meet her eventually, but let’s get to the dojo. I’m sure you’ll want a tour!”
“Sounds like a great idea, Kasumi’s probably too busy right now.” Nabiki said, trying her best to keep her composure.
Katie arched an eyebrow, but after a few seconds of thought, she could understand how they were both feeling less than adequate with their smoking hot older sister looming in the wings. “We didn’t get to finish our spar and this might be our best chance to finish it.” She threw the sisters a lifeline, one that was sure to add any brownie points she might have already earned with them.
Ranma, sensing that there was no point in pursuing the Kasumi topic, went with the change. “Yeah, I really do want to see which of us is better.”
“Try not to obliterate the building please.” Nabiki said, her tone almost pleading. “You can break a few boards, crack a hole in one of the walls but at least try to leave it standing. Minor repairs don’t rock the boat but something major could sink us.”
Akane, remembering the mini-tornado from earlier, could only nod in agreement. “Yeah, that’d be real bad.” She may not have been greedy like her sister but she didn’t want to funnel any new found income into rebuilding the dojo.
Katie and Ranma just exchanged a short look and shrug. “We’ll try to be careful, but don’t be afraid to bill my roommate for any damages, for real.”
“Does she cover all of your shenanigans?” Nabiki asked.
Katie nodded. “She even paid for that clock I broke. That was like a drop in the bucket for her.”
“I see,” Nabiki said in a cooler tone than her usual.
“Still, try to keep it down, okay?” Akane said as they came in through the front door.
“RANMA!” An exuberant Soun Tendo greeted them, but specifically him, as soon as they were through the threshold. “Welcome to the Tendo Dojo, son!”
The patriarch of the Tendo family came right up to the foursome, beaming brightly when he finally got a look at the young man one of his daughters would certainly marry. “I see that you at the very least don’t take after your father in the looks department. Which is good, very good, right girls?”
“Uh, thanks?” Ranma replied.
Nabiki keenly nodded. “Not that I’m a shallow girl…”
“You absolutely are,” Katie muttered in English.
“… But at least be thankful that you might not grow up to look like your old man,” She went on to suggest.
Soun strolled up and hooked an arm around Ranma’s shoulder. “So, how about my daughters, eh? Lookers aren’t they?”
“They’re pretty nice people, yeah,” Ranma quickly corrected him.
“Just you wait until Kasumi gets home,” Soun went on, as if not hearing him. “She’s a darling girl, loves to cook, and is sharp as a blade. She likes to play humble, but I’ve caught her reading those medical books she picks up from Tofu time to time.”
Akane hummed. “Where is Kasumi?”
“She went out this morning as soon as you left to get some errands done,” Soun replied. “She said she’d be gone most of the day.”
Nabiki immediately narrowed her eyes. Kasumi was pretty sharp, and if she was willing to vanish for the whole day that meant she had a plan of her own. A quick glance in Ranma’s direction made her pretty certain what she was up to.
“Well, that’s all right. I was here to check out the dojo, anyway,” Ranma said.
Soun nodded. “Of course, of course. Feel free to stay for dinner, as well! This is your home now, after all.”
“Actually… I’m just visiting, I have to go to work after this…” Plus he wasn’t keen on staying the night at the Tendos given that he might wake up at the altar the next morning tied down. Nothing against the girls, it was the whole Dad factor. “Plus I don’t want to be a strain on your food supply…”
Katie shrugged her shoulders. “Misao let you in the house at all, so our couch is your couch.”
Soun didn’t care for Ranma being in such close proximity to girls that weren’t his daughters about as much as Genma didn’t care for him working as a girl. “Nonsense, nonsense, you should stay here from now on. This is eventually going to be yours, after all.”
“Uh, thanks but…” Ranma stopped when he noticed that Soun was beginning to manifest a rather large menacing aura. It was downright demonic, dark and filled with an anger barely contained by Soun’s mockery of civility.
“Okay… that’s actually a little intimidating,” Ranma thought
“Is there something wrong with my daughters that makes you uncomfortable, Saotome? Is all that I am giving you not good enough? Is my generosity and hospitality lacking in some way?” Soun asked as he advanced upon Ranma a bit more, looming over him with an almost fully demonic air about him.
Ranma actually took a step back, hesitant to go onto his guard, but at the same time quick to seek out a way from being in this situation.
“Daddy, stop!” Akane said quickly. “If Ranma doesn’t want to stay, then that’s fine!”
Soun paid it no heed. “Well, Ranma?! What exactly is your problem with this arrangement-!”
He then stopped, and drew back from Ranma a full five paces. Directly behind Ranma, Akane, and Nabiki, Katie was staring directly at Soun, her eyes dull despite the murderous intent they drilled into him. He skin crawled, as if he could feel her hands clamping around his neck.
Reaching up, she then brushed some hair from her face. “Oi, isn’t that a bit rude? Bad enough he got dragged here by force, but you have to treat him like it’s his fault for not wanting to stay, too?”
Akane agreed wholeheartedly. “That’s what I mean, Ranma’s not going to want to marry anyone if you treat him like this, Daddy!”
Soun, a lot meeker (and suddenly extremely wary of the wild girl glaring at him), tried to put up a token defense. “It’s his responsibility to…”
“He didn’t even know it was his responsibility until yesterday! None of us knew!” Akane shot back.
“Akane has a point,” Nabiki pointed out. “We didn’t get any warning about this at all, nice as Ranma is.”
She looked to the side, feigning sorrow. “I mean, how awful is it? To be treated like a commodity to be traded and sold at our own father’s whim?”
She turned completely around, microphone in hand, and a spotlight shining down upon her. “With no say in our own destinies, we exist not as people but as mere trading stock! A resource to tap for wealth and prosperity and escaping a bill!”
Akane, who had a rather excellent history of stage performance, swooned and fell to her knees dramatically into the spotlight, just behind her sister. One hand rested on her knee, the other at her mouth as she wept. “How awful, to be betrayed by father…”
Soun was soundly defeated by this impromptu improv performance, the arrows of guilt having rammed deep through his body and into his soul. They were bigger, heftier arrows than they ought to be, though, as if there was some kind of unspoken and weighty validation behind them that was yet to be revealed… until right now: Picolet Chardin.
Bawling in contrition, Soun threw himself down to their feet. “I’m sorry! I’m sorry! Please take your time to get acclimated to us! Don’t think us Tendo family as awful people!”
“Eh, all right,” Ranma said. “I’ll accept your apology if you show us to the dojo.”
Soun was his jovial self in a second. “Of course, right this way my boy!”
As he turned away to lead them down the hall to the dojo, however, Soun developed a more serious look and darted it out the corner of his eye towards Katie. His demonic aura of intimidation was one that only his master could really resist, but it was ultimately a bluff for scaring off opponents to buy time for an escape, a counterattack or both. That girl’s look… those eyes… there was no bluffing there.
“I should discuss this with Saotome, that girl has a killer’s eyes…” He thought to himself.
Katie stepped up to Ranma and gently nudged his shoulder. “Hey, Ranma.”
“Yeah?” He asked when he looked at her.
“Get ready,” she said with a noticeably smile now. “When we get in there, I’m going to give you a real treat.”
Well now Ranma was plain ol’ curious. “A treat, huh?”
Katie nodded and looked forward to the dojo. Her blood was heated up again already, and once they were out on the floor, it would be boiling.
In the dojo, Katie’s school uniform came off, revealing underneath a pair of red bicycle shorts and a black and red sports top. Cracking her neck, and stretching to pop her back and shoulders, she turned and looked across the floor of the dojo, where Ranma stood with Soun. The two were standing side by side, with Ranma doing his own stretches and limbering up for the fight. Between them, Nabiki and Akane sat on the sidelines, wearing face visors to protect from splinters.
“Well, hopefully it won’t be interrupted this time,” Akane said, quite eager to see how long Ranma could last against her senpai.
“We can only hope.” Nabiki was more interested in seeing Akane’s senpai being used as a mop to wax the floor with her blood.
Over by Ranma, Soun was still quite contrite as he spoke in a low voice. “I’m sorry for the manner with which I behaved before, but I think you should hear me out, son.”
“Don’t call me son, but what is it?” Ranma asked as he stretched to touch his foot to the back of his head, prompting Nabiki to bite her lower lip.
“Be careful against that girl, there’s something… unseemly about her,” Soun said gently, “She’s got a menacing air about her.”
“She just doesn’t tolerate nonsense,” Ranma deflected. “She punted Pops into the next town over for his.”
Soun recoiled. “She did what?!”
“But that’s okay. Besides, I’ve fought her before, I know what I’m in for.”
He actually didn’t, as he would find out in but a moment as Katie called over to him. “So! Since we were interrupted this morning right when it was getting good, I think we should change it up a bit to get right back into the swing of it.”
Ranma paused. “Oh yeah, what did you have in mind?”
Katie smiled and stepped up to the edge of the floor reserved for fighting. “I’m going to show you a little bit of my Uncle’s fighting style. The one I’ve been trained most in since I was four.”
That was unexpected. “… You mean you haven’t?”
This was news to Akane too. “Your Uncle has a fighting style?”
Katie nodded. “Yep, I’ve used it off and on, but I roll so much other stuff on top of it, that I never have a chance to go back to basics. And Ranma here is so good, that I wanna give him my best. ‘Course, that means we'll have to change the rules from first to hit wina to first to yield loses.”
Ranma was fine with that. “Depends on if you can hit me.”
“Oh, I will.” She looked to Akane and winked. “Pay close attention, you might learn a thing or two.”
Akane felt a little chagrined by the teasing but she let it slide. She would be lying hardcore if she said she wasn’t excited to see her senpai’s absolute best. “I will.”
Katie turned her attention to Ranma, and the smile on her face turn feral. There was no flirtation to the expression, just pure battle mania. As though the prospect of the fight alone was bringing her-
“Pleasure, that’s what this spar is to her. Is she out for blood or what?” There was no worries in Ranma’s mind as he sauntered out to the floor. He had grown up in the wild and knew what to do when it came to beasts who lived to bite. “If she thinks she can just sink her fangs into me, she has another thing coming.”
He stopped across from her, sliding down into a stance that was reminiscent of Jeet Kune Do. “Ready when you are.”
Katie threw a few more punches to the side, away from Ranma, before pulling herself up into the basic stance of what appeared to be Muay Thai. Her right leg was leading just a little, her right clearly intended to be her jabbing hand.
Akane raised an eyebrow. “Thai boxing...?”
Nabiki frowned, feeling like the tease wasn’t being delivered on. “That’s not it, is it?”
Ranma narrowed his eyes and studied his opponent for a long second. “The more I look at it, the more it looks ever so slightly off. It’s not just Thai boxing... probably.” He kept his cool and smirked. “So? We doing this or what?” Deep down, he had already catalogued nearly all the ways she could attack him and how he could counter. If it was just Thai boxing, this would be over quickly.
Katie just chuckled. “I’m ready now. Do you want first move?”
“Ladies first.” His face was filled with egotistical condescension, clearly spoiling his motive to irritate her.
“Don’t regret it now~?” She replied, before firing off a right jab at high speed that sliced the air apart.
From Ranma’s perspective, it wasn’t so much a punch as it was a harpoon fired at him. From what he knew of Muay Thai, that was too fast and placed wrong. Still, he dodged it, looking like it required no effort. He fired back a left cross that was slapped aside, followed by a right front kick that was slipped. “She’s already faster than earlier. Already revved up and going full throttle despite the long cooldown. What a monster.” That was okay, he was a monster too.
She dipped into a right elbow that seemed like it was trying to blow through Ranma and kill the guy that was figuratively behind him.
Ranma slid away from the elbow and noted again that the placement was wrong. In normal Thai boxing, that would be more towards the head, not towards the sternum. Such placement significantly increased the chance for an agonizing injury, if not death. “The force and speed behind it are even more than usual. This isn’t the Thai boxing used for sport, this is the real deal.”
Soun’s eyes narrowed as the two teens circled each other. “A killer’s eyes and a killer’s style. It is as I feared.” He thought, recognizing the style immediately. “You’ve noticed, haven’t you son? She isn’t using Muay Thai, but its progenitor Muay Boran. A true art of violence, designed to reign supreme on the most savage battlefield known as war.”
Ranma nodded his head and went in, throwing a series of punches that left minute openings. They were all blocked or slipped, not a single baited hook reeled in a fished for counter. “She’ll bite when she wants to, no amount of trying to get her to counter will work eh? Fine by me.”
Katie furrowed her brow in concentration. “I get the feeling he still isn’t taking me seriously. Let’s change that.” She reared back and threw forth a bomb of a left that almost hummed in the air for his face.
Ranma jerked his head back just in the nick of time, feeling the puff of displaced air as her arm reached the end of its reach. Intriguing, she was throwing fast and hard without sacrificing either. “Game on huh? Message received loud and clear.”
He shot forward, charging inside her reach and firing his own blow for her liver. It whiffed, and Ranma narrowly blocked a quick series of strikes, the offensive beating him back before an opening appeared in Katie’s guard that he decisively exploited, ducking down onto one hand while thrusting a kick up at her chin.
Katie weaved back from the kick, but her attempted roundhouse kick to punish her inverted opponent missed as Ranma sprung himself off his hands and directly above her, planting his feet on the ceiling.
“Oh!” Akane and Nabiki exclaimed, before Ranma came down on Katie, first seemingly tumbling to swing his own heel down onto her head. When she smartly raised her arms to block, he twisted his entire body like a cat avoiding falling onto her and getting the opening he needed to kick her in the chest as he caught himself on one hand.
“How did he do that?!” Katie thought as pain echoed through her chest. Those reflexes were incredible!
As she caught herself, Ranma hopped off his hand and landed on his feet. He could see Katie was smiling despite her taking a hit. That just compelled him to hit her hard enough to knock that grin off her face. “The Saotome School of Indiscriminate Grappling specializes in aerial combat. It doesn’t matter what position I’m in, I can always attack!”
He demonstrated thusly rushing straight for Katie and lashing out with a kick that she blocked with her right arm. Rather than go back, Ranma went up, jumping off her raised arm and then rebounding off the ceiling to kick downward. Katie sidestepped the blow, and fired off a swift right hook that went through the speed lines Ranma left behind as he leaped past her, only to abruptly twist himself around and spin kick her in the back.
She was just fast enough to turn and bring her right shoulder and sloppily raised forearm to block the hit, but lost her footing as Ranma rebounded right back to the ceiling and this time dashed right over her head and towards the nearest wall.
“He’s all over the place!” Katie thought as Ranma kicked off it and fell upon her, the momentum helping his punch as she brought up both hands to block it. With even quicker leg work, he deluged her with a total of three kicks, the last one he used to spring off her. “So fast, too!”
Ranma’s feet finally touched the floor, a smile of his own as he sized up Katie’s style. Defensively she was a fortress, nearly impossible to get off her footing, and fast in a straight line. However, she didn’t have much counter for his agility that he could see. It was time to hammer that weak point until it broke.
In the space of that assessment, Ranma’s full weight had yet to hit the floor, and when it did he was off again, every microsecond dedicated to plotting out potential routes for his next series of strikes and possible counters. Katie had a million ways to stop him, but he had a million and one.
Though in actuality, Katie had a million and two.
As he took off the ground again, this time to kick, he saw it: the Muay Boran stance shifted again, both feet planting as she adopted a stance more suited for grappling than striking. But what was most important, was that she opened her guard completely for the attack.
And it was at this moment that Ranma knew… he fucked up.
Ranma’s flying spin kick didn’t even connect, as Katie lunged into it and, as his leg grazed her side, snatched him out of the air by the front of his shirt at the shoulder with one hand. The rest of her arm went right across his chest, his own momentum turning the strike into a devastating lariat as his course reversed and then went straight down into the floor.
Akane gasped at the sight of Ranma being plucked clean out of the air and driven into the floor like an American Football in the endzone. Bouncing off the floor, Ranma caught himself on his hands and feet and sprang away from Katie, but as he attempted to set down she was closing in, her eyes locked squarely on him as she lashed out and caught his right arm in her right hand.
“Whoa…!” Nabiki gasped.
Akane leaned forward, amazed. “That grappling…”
Counter the grab, use it against her. That’s what he tried to do before he could even think it, but his footing was completely absent to do any of that as she pulled him into her, and they met at her knee and his solar plexus, the force of the blow knocking the wind out of him as he was raised higher off the floor.
Through the pain, Ranma realized something shocking. “She’s… faster…!”
Soun narrowed his eyes. “You need to escape her hold, Ranma!”
He attempted to regain his footing, but his arm was arrested, still clamped tightly in her right hand. It was time to go unorthodox! He immediately brought his whole body up, wrapping his arms around hers and hooking his legs over her shoulder, taking her arm and extending it into an armbar.
“He’s got her!” Soun said.
Nabiki threw forth a fist. “Yeah! Go get her, Ranma! Break her arm off!”
Surprised by Ranma’s counter, Katie staggered a bit, before she planted her feet, keeping her arm held out and Ranma held up above the floor. She could feel the strain and pressure Ranma placed on her joints and muscles.
Soun nodded as he observed the move. It was textbook, yet unorthodox, the very form of Indiscriminate Grappling. “You’ve taught him well, Saotome. This boy is worthy to succeed us!”
Katie looked over at Ranma, who grinned defiantly, before she returned the smile. If he was good enough to get her in an armbar, then escaping it wasn’t going to be easy. However… if things were easy, she wouldn’t have him deemed him worthy of Heaven.
She crouched, bending at the knees while still holding his arm straight out, leaped upward, striking Ranma directly against one of the beams supporting the roof of the dojo. The blow shoved him into the ceiling, crumpling him against the ceiling and effectively freeing her from the lock. To his complete disbelief.
“She…!” Ranma thought as both began to fall.
“… Broke…!” Soun gasped, as Katie shoved Ranma below her and began to turn in the air.
“… Out!” Akane said right before Katie connected not her tibia, not her knee, but her elbow–driving it into his sternum.
The floor shattered in a wide circle from the force of the blow.
Ranma then rammed into the center of the circle, bouncing off it as it shattered and splintered from the second impact.
The last thing Ranma saw before everything went black was Katie hanging in the air above him, a murderous smile on her black-hair framed face.
The last thought he had… was that he needed to know how to beat that.
“Ranma!” All three Tendos present cried, coming over to stand at the edge of the broken floor.
Katie landed just outside the edge of the hole, peering down at the fallen Saotome.
Akane knelt down, checking on the condition of the pigtailed boy. That blow had been tremendous, maybe even harder than Kuno had been struck when he was sent through the clock tower. Her body trembled at the sight of her senpai’s power but it wasn’t out of fear. She was excited to see someone so powerful, so skilled present in her dojo. It made her want to get good enough to fight Katie on the level Ranma had.
For the first time in years, she had a goal to pursue in the art and it felt amazing.
Nabiki stared at the black haired girl, disbelief evident on her face. She didn’t think Ranma was invincible but seeing him in action only to be swatted aside like that just shocked her all the more. It reminded her that this girl was her age, her own classmate no less, and yet they were so far apart it was like they were polar opposites.
Was she invincible? Was that it? Could no one beat her? The spike of disbelief deepened itself into a burning flame of envy. Why was it that she was denied these gifts and talents? Why was yet another example of how feeble and weak she was staring her in the face, only it was someone who wasn’t entirely a goody little two-shoes about it?
She almost clenched her hands into fists but thought better of it.
“He’s alive, but out cold.” Soun announced, having been the one to go down in amongst the broken floorboards and tatami to check on the son of his dear friend. The boy was magnificent, but that girl... she was something else.
“I wasn’t trying to kill him and he’s too hearty for that to hurt him for long.” Katie said, schooling her features into a confident smirk at the Tendo Patriarch. “I could tell from hitting him that if I didn’t do something big, he’d just absorb my hits and keep coming. Can’t stop a charging elephant with love taps y’know.”
Soun narrowed his eyes in contemplation, before he let her words go. “I guess I can’t fault you too much for that. He was going to break your arm if you tried a more conventional attempt at escaping.”
Both of his daughters looked to their father, slightly shocked at that. They were both escalating the spar that much.
“We can’t fault her for fighting to the best of her abilities.” Akane said, looking down at Ranma, noticing that he was breathing if a little shallowly.
“Ranma-kun did seem to be going full bore too.” Nabiki allowed, doing her best to not look at Katie.
“Should probably leave him there for a little bit, just to let him recover.” Katie said, crouching down at the edge of the hole. “Moving him too soon is bad.”
“Let’s not dump cold water on him either. The shock might cause problems.” Soun added, still silently measuring this dangerous animal girl. Yes, animal, a good descriptor. She hungered to bite and tear at flesh, that elbow had surely shown that. That uncle of hers must have been a real monster to do this to her.
It would turn out that he had forgotten that lies exist because the truth hurts so much more.
Time had passed, but how much was not known to the waking mind of Ranma Saotome. What he did know was that he smelled food and now was the time to figure out the rest. He was sprawled out on a futon, a damp towel on his forehead to control his body temperature. His eyes cracked open, pain from the light stinging his eyes. He looked around and realized this must be the family room of the Tendo House, they must have moved him here after he had been knocked out.
Knocked out, which meant he had lost the spar. He hadn’t underestimated her at all, he just didn’t have enough data to ensure a proper measurement. He hadn’t ever really met someone who could match, if not surpass, him in speed. It was an eye opening experience, one he’d have to revisit as he started training again.
He did something ill-advised and sat up, the room swirling for a second as he gasped for air
“Oh you shouldn’t do that!” A soft voice called from just out of his view, from behind him. It sounded warm and comforting, like a sweater on a chilly day. He didn’t recognize this one, their mom?
“I’m okay, I’m used to this.” He bluffed, trying his best to be reassuring. He closed his eyes, as a pair of hands with well manicured nails gently took his shoulders and lowered his head back down not onto a pillow but to on a warm, soft lap.
“I grew up in a dojo and in this town and I know injuries when I see them.” The voice took on a sharper quality, she sounded peeved at his bravado. “But you’re already up so just stay still.” There was an edge of warning in her voice, one he decided to obey.
“Yeah, sorry. I’m not good at following the rules, y’know?” He replied, a rhetorical shrug and a verbal grin dancing merrily along the words.
The woman huffs in amusement, before she spoke again. Her voice was directly above him. “I can see that.”
Ranma opened his eyes and froze as if he had been ran through with a lightning bolt. If all the girls he had seen so far were all sorts of crazy hot, he had just tripped over a downright goddess of pure hotness. Her long brown hair started straight down to her chin, before it became a beautiful display of curls down to her mid back. She was wearing a pink sweater over a cream-colored button-down shirt and a pair of tight blue capris. She had such grace and style that stole the sarcastic quip right out of his mouth, crumples it up and feeds it back to him in the form of a fat tongue knotted up in amazement.
“Uh... hi.” It wasn’t shy in the least, he was just too stunned to form any kind of added emotion.
“Yes, hello.” She said, giving a little bow. “I’m Kasumi, Nabiki-chan and Akane-chan’s older sister.”
“Sister!?” The word echoed in sheer disbelief through his mind, before he decided to speak. “I’m Ranma... Ranma Saotome.”
“It’s a pleasure, though I had hoped our first meeting would have been better.” Kasumi said, a brief pout crossing her face.
Ranma almost forgot himself for a second, but he caught himself. “Well, it’s better than me being drug her against my will.” He tried humor to recover, but this proved to be an unwise move.
Kasumi laughed and Ranma felt like getting put through the floor of the dojo was a small price to pay to witness such a thing.
Her laughter attracted company, as Katie popped up from somewhere else in the house. “Hey I, uh… wanted to check on him, see if he was okay and all...”
Ranma’s eyes narrowed at the bashful way Katie was acting, but being around Kasumi really did seem to excuse it a tiny bit.
“He’s apparently fine, Katie-chan.” Kasumi said, smiling at the girl. There’s a tickling warmth in the tone, which proceeded to melt Katie’s insides.
Ranma forgot all about excusing the bashfulness and focused on the swell of jealousy deep within himself at that moment.
“That’s... that’s uh, really great!” Katie managed, her face has turned a bright red at this point. She turned around and called back into the house. “Oi! You two, he’s awake!”
More footsteps followed and soon Akane and Nabiki joined them. Without prompting, he began to compare the sisters to Kasumi and found that it wasn’t quite as much as a wash-out for the eldest he had subconsciously been thinking. All three had their best sides that appealed to him in a fashion that outdid the others and oh lord he was about to become some kind of sick pervert.
“How you feeling champ?” Nabiki asked, trying to be neutral and hide her concern in addition to her contempt for Kasumi’s fantastic makeover. He couldn’t see it but the way she said it seems like she had been chewing on her lips right before she spoke.
“Like I got knocked through a floor.” He returned with a light bit of levity. He smiled to defuse any offense taken from the comment. “Nah, outside of my pride, I’m fine. I’m used to aches and pains by this point.” They usually took the form of his father after all.
“That’s good!” Akane said, all cute and bubbly. Her voice wafts through the room like a warm breeze, where upon it does a dance across Ranma’s brain. It reminded him of ingesting a sugarcube after having a lemon wedge. All fizzy and electric, leaving behind a dizzying rush that reminded you what it was like to be alive.
“Because it’d be bad otherwise right?” Katie teased, and Ranma found that he wasn’t as on guard around her anymore. He had finally quantified the discomfort and thus he could be passively aware of the danger she posed instead of actively alert.
“C’mon Senpai, you know what I meant!” Akane wailed in mock distress, drawing a laugh from both girls.
“Anyways,” Nabiki’s cool voice butted in now, serving as a soothing balm to the rising irritation at the by-play happening before him. “Katie called her roommate and explained things about the spar, so you have a little bit of a grace period to eat dinner before heading over.” From the angry squeak Akane gave, it was apparent she had been scooped on delivering the good news.
“Wouldn’t want to show up late to work without an explanation.” Ranma muttered, before looking down at the futon. “Is it okay for me to get up now?”
Kasumi nodded. “As long as you’re not dizzy anymore.”
He slowly lifted his head from her lap, and he was reintroduced to the lingering burn of pain where Katie’s elbow had met his sternum. Nothing else would have put him down for the count like that, something she had somehow determined over the course of their two spars. Interesting, something else to consider later. “So when’s dinner?”
“In just a few, there was a sale on beef today.” Kasumi answered and Ranma could feel a chill in the air at that.
“Well lucky me I guess.” He ignored the frostiness and sniffed the air. “Smells great!”
“It’s more western fare,” Kasumi said as she rose back to her feet. “Since Katie-chan’s come to visit, I’ve been curious to try it.”
On that note she looked to Katie. “I’m just about finished with it, but would you mind helping me out a bit with some finishing touches?”
“Uh? Sure,” Katie said, before looking over to Ranma and flashing him a smile. “Hey man, sorry for putting you into the floor like that.”
Ranma, though feeling the sting of defeat, brushed it off. “One of us was going through it, I just wished it wasn’t me.”
Reassuringly, Katie decided to pay him a compliment. “That armbar was brilliant, and I didn’t want to take any chances with the usual outs. I probably would’ve had my arm ripped out my socket ten different ways.”
“Twenty,” Ranma corrected, though it was actually one hundred and three at last count. One hundred four now, though–he would remember Katie’s creative counter.
Katie smiled, just before Kasumi called to her. “Katie-chan, I could really use a hand on this.”
Huffing in amusement, she turned for the kitchen. “All right, all right…” She looked back over to Ranma and smiled. “We’ll do this again soon though, that whole fight was too good.”
And with that she was gone, and Ranma turned to find Nabiki and Akane waiting for them to join him at the sitting table. Soun was just outside the room on the home’s patio, leaning against a post and smoking a cigarette. He appeared to be in deep contemplation.
“Geez,” he said as he rubbed his chest, “I expected great things… but that was something else entirely.”
“I don’t think any less of you for losing,” Nabiki revealed to Ranma. “You’ll get her next time.”
Ranma smirked. “You’re damn right I will.”
Akane then not so discreetly slid a glass of water that had been on her side of the table, right up to Nabiki. A quick look at it and the realization that followed granted the much more discreetly smirking Akane a brief glare of grudging respect from her older sister.
“I would temper your eagerness to fight her again, Ranma-kun,” Soun said.
Ranma looked over at Soun. “What?”
Soun took a drag from his cigarette, and exhaled a long cloud of smoke visible in the orange glow of the descending sun. “That girl… she’s not a normal martial artist. There’s so much anger and aggression there.” He turned and gave Ranma a dramatic look. “If you fight her again, and push her too far, she will kill you.”
"Daddy! Don't say that kind of thing about Katie-senpai, especially behind her back!"
Soun shook his head sadly. "I'm not saying anything terrible about her, but rather the one who trained her in the first place. Whoever it was, they have instilled within her a lust for battle and blood that is unhealthy outside only the most vicious battlefield. Lurking beneath your friend's exterior is a rabid wolf on a rusty chain. Ranma. If you fight her again, she will go for far more lethal blows without even meaning to."
Nabiki, while not a fighter, was certainly not ignorant of the world of fighting thanks to growing up in it. “Daddy has a point.”
Ranma folded his arms. “She won’t kill anyone, not on purpose or on accident.”
Soun couldn’t see that, not with the menace and brutality in her moves against Ranma, or what he heard of from her fight with Kuno.
“If she wanted blood, she could’ve gotten it,” he said, “All she had to do was drag out the fight until we beat on each other enough for there to be blood.”
He gave Akane a reassuring look. “She ain’t no killer or a psycho or anything… she just gets off on fighting.”
Akane recoiled a bit, a blush appearing on her face at the very context of Ranma’s statement. “G-gets off…?”
Soun disagreed. “That wasn’t mere excitement for a fight, don’t mistake it as such.”
“She’s a hardcore adrenaline junkie,” Ranma assessed. “She acts really cool and detached, but I saw it both times we fought–the better her opponent, the more excited she gets, and I impressed her so much that she showed me something that I want to beat, and I’m going to beat it.” He smiled. “I couldn’t call myself a martial artist or a man if I didn’t accept that challenge.”
Nabiki picked up the glass of water and took a sip from it, mostly to cool her face from Ranma’s boast.
Akane herself then remembered their very first spar, and the smile that was on Katie’s face after she had put her into the wall. Suddenly she found herself wondering what would’ve happened had Sasuke not interrupted the spar. Their spars after had been somewhat lower intensity after that, more exercise to keep in shape than pushing limits… but that was going to change.
Soun still wasn’t swayed, but unlike Genma he wasn’t going to fight the boy over his opinion. “Be careful then, Ranma. Whichever of us is right, I dread what sort of terrible thing she might do if she becomes too excited.”0
If there was anyone who had a good idea of what a motivated Katie could get up to, it was Kasumi of all people, who let out a giggle as she overheard Soun’s dread-filled statement over the eager kiss she shared with Katie, who was embracing her from behind at the counter next to the stove, where dinner simmered for its final minutes of preparation.
“Mm… what’s so funny?” Katie whispered as she broke the kiss.
Kasumi smiled vibrantly as her right cheek was nuzzled tenderly by the foreigner’s left. “That I’m doing such a terrible thing.”
Katie, who had also heard it, grinned back and nuzzled lower, towards Kasumi’s neck. “You could do so much worse.”
She emphasized that by sliding her hands, which had been at her trim waist, down to her hips and giving them an appreciative squeeze. Kasumi responded with an excited sigh, and slipped her own right hand up to caress the right side of Katie’s face. “Sounds like fun.”
Katie giggled herself, and went right back to helping Kasumi with some finishing touches.
“BansheeDeadSix here, and welcome to the Debrief, where I spend ten seconds of a two minute news report introducing the two minute news report.” In her now studio-style lit living room, Misao stood, rather than sat, in front of a camera tripod, her back to a mural featuring a P-47D Thunderbolt with a rainbow haired blue pegasus painted on its fuselage slashing through the air past an exploding Messerschmitt Me 262 jet fighter, the former plane’s wing-mounted eight machine guns blazing fire.
She, dressed more professionally in a black top and blue jean skirt, looked at her watch. “And that’s it.”
Looking back up at the camera, Misao spoke. “First off, Pokémon. The Pokémon Company released images of the starters for Pokémon Sun and Moon, and already I don’t care for the grass and water starters because CUTE FIRE CAT OH. MY GOD. Game of the Year, and I say this with confidence after playing SuperHot, Souls 3, and Overwatch.”
She then brightened. “Speaking of, the Overwatch Beta was a smashing success! With thousands queueing for hours to enjoy thirty seconds of getting fucked by Bastion players before the connection drops. Your very own Banshee spent the entire first day of the Beta making Zenyatta her handsome robo husbando, and Widowmaker her ice cold waifu–and every Tracer salty. You can see clips of that in the link to my right!”
A smirk appeared on her face. “But I already know who you all want me to cosplay as, and a certain generous fellow has already shipped the parka my way. Once it arrives, patrons are in for a special, frosty treat!”
She then put her hands together. “In more somber news, Disney has shuttered its Infinity line, and withdrawn completely from publishing video games in house. With Activision’s Skylanders seeing a downward trend in sales in the toys-to-life niche over the last two years, Disney’s lack of confidence in its knockoff Infinity line drove them to make the decision to close things down. Disney is still committed to the video game industry, with Kingdom Hearts 3 set to release after Square Enix finally runs out of ways they can milk Kingdom Hearts 2.”
Misao then produced a cup of tea with a Lipton label hanging from the teabag string and took a sip as she looked to the side. Lowering it, she carries on. “China’s new console, Fuze’s Tomahawk P1, is a blatant ripoff of the PS4 and Xbox One. You’ll probably see it soon in the west, when a smarmy British commentator reviews it on a comfortable looking couch. And you’ll see it even sooner here in Japan, collecting dust just behind all the Xbox One on store shelves.”
Misao made finger motions, as if firing guns. “Hashtag Shots Fired! The staff here at BansheeDeadSix is probably not going to do a first look at the console, not because I insulted the company, China’s pride in ripping things off, or the fact that it’s literally a knockoff of two consoles I already reviewed–but because China has banned streams of girls eating bananas from their glorified intranet–and I need my potassium intake while gaming guys, you know this.”
From behind her back she produced a peeled banana and erotically plunged it into her mouth, taking it further than was safe, withdrew it slowly, pushed it in again, and–after giving a pouty look to the camera–bit through it.
“Don’t worry,” she said coyly, “I swallowed.”
She opens her mouth and sticks out her tongue as proof. “Finally, in a bit of good news, that a call to boycott against yours truly in defense of a certain vidya gaems writer, regarding the viral spread of certain comments on a stream about a certain party of women whom may or may not be related to said writer, evaporated as said party of women confirmed the veracity of statements made by yours truly.”
She grinned. “Filming for projects related to those statements is due to begin once schedules align… and divorce proceedings pan out. And that’s it for the Debrief. Like, comment, subscribe, always check your six and remember that the number one rule to combat is survive. BansheeDeadSix, over and out!”
Producing a remote, she shut off the camera and pumped her fist. “One take, flawless. Yes!”
She performed a pirouette where she stood, stopping when she saw on the kitchen wall-mounted digital face clock. It was 19:40, which meant that her roommate and houseguest were going to be here. “In three, two, one…”
The door opened, just as she predicted. In walked Katie first, a light spring in her step as Ranma brought up the rear. He was still not used to having a regular place to return to that wasn’t a tent in the park or hiding in a bush, it showed in his footsteps. Ready to bolt if he needed to, the mark of a wild animal feeling like it’s wandered into a cage.
Misao nodded, she was used to the skittish behavior. After all, Katie had been like that at first, aggressively stamping around while looking out for the moment someone was going to fall from the sky and try to kill her. She knew she had to work with what she was given, the coal to be pressed into a diamond.
Time to move.
“Hey you two!” She called, her voice bubbling along the walls. Katie’s pace immediately slowed down into something of a more measured gait, while Ranma’s relaxes into something more flat footed. Her voice has done its job in making sure that they won’t be assaulted. “Martial artists...” She rolled her eyes but it wasn’t in scorn or mockery.
“Hey, already done with the Debrief?” Katie took point, letting Ranma continue to bring himself down.
“Just finished!” Misao replied, slipping out to see the two of them still walking towards the studio. It was a slight bit later than she wanted, but they were going to put Ranma’s girl form on the internet and watch it explode in a wave of otaku tears and money. “One take is all I needed, bae!” She looked past Katie and shot Ranma a wink, just to see what would happen.
“Good job boss.” Ranma said, his tone even and respectful. It’s slight, but his face had faintly turned a shade of red. He was still adjusting to the sudden shift in his life where he traded in his Panda Dad for a bunch of hot girls. Not that he was about to complain, mind you, whoever made that deal got hosed something fierce.
Pleased with the reaction, Misao got down to brass tacks. “All right, go grab some cold water and a towel. We got enough time for me to give you a crash course on how to do this thing without too much issue. Once you got it, we’ll be doing a quickie first time stream to get your face out there to the general public.” She watched as his face soured and waited.
He didn’t defy her expectation. “I still don’t get why I gotta be a girl.” That was mostly a lie, he knew enough that a pretty girl could survive for days without cash and eat like a Queen. He was a guy, damn it.
Misao smirked, sidestepping the usual arguing in favor of shutting everything down. “Don’t worry, that’s part of the lecture.” Her smirk ditched the edge and softened down into a smile. “You’re going to places few boys ever will. That makes you pretty special in my eyes.”
The buttering worked, as Ranma’s neck suddenly felt hot at his employer’s words. “All right, I’ll go get the water.” He slumped away, shoulders hunched with embarrassment. It’ll be a while before he got used to a pretty girl telling him all the sweet things in the world.
Misao turned to Katie, eyes narrowed a little as she observed her roommate with a cool gaze. “All right,” she said in English, just in case. “What has you about to start breaking out into song today?”
Katie took a moment to consider her answer, before her face twisted into one of those infuriating smiles that make you wanna try and punch it off their face. She had a great day and is flaunting it at anyone dumb enough to ask. “Oh not much, me and Ranma had it out in a fight. I won just so you know.”
Misao snorted, as she could read between the lines enough to see the truth of the matter. Fighting alone would never ever have made her this chipper, the only other thing that had Katie walking on air like this was a successful hookup. “Must be her...”
That girl in the photo Katie had texted her a week or so ago. Not her Kouhai, but that girl’s oldest sister. Damn, she still couldn’t think about that girl without being consumed by lust. Couldn’t even be jealous, she’d be all up on Kasumi too if the opportunity knocked.
“So yeah, I’m golden tonight so you two have your NEET initiation or whatever.” Katie replied, all innocent like.
“You bitch.” Misao only thought it because Ranma returned before she could verbalize it.
“Got the water and the towel, now what?” He already knew what, he wanted to know where it was supposed to happen.
“Follow me to the couch,” Misao said, pushing whatever thoughts she had about Katie and what was going on with the girl from her mind. Time was now to get ready to put up another huge revenue stream, one that didn’t even realize the potential at its fingertips.
She turned back to the couch in front of her huge entertainment setup and led him to where he was going to make his stream debut. As a she but there wouldn’t be any smoke and mirrors. With real, legit actual magic on their side, she was going to turn this slab of beef into the tenderest lamb. All before dangling her before the wolves of the internet.
It was almost sick but you didn’t get anywhere in this world with a weak stomach and no convictions. They were right outside the chair he was going to sit in when they stopped. She turned to him, eyes full of authority. “Transform and dry off. Once you’re reasonably dry, you can sit down and I’ll begin our lesson for today.”
Transform, like he was some kind of Henshin hero, only with water and sex-changing instead of wind and bugs. So simple, yet so complex.
Ranma lifted the glass of cold water over his head before it’s turned upside down, upending its contents onto his head.
Misao’s eyes are glued to him, taking in every detail, to study and dissect later.
The change is never the same two times in a row, never has, never would as far as Ranma knew. This time, he felt the chill of the water shoot through his entire body before it hit. Ah, that tingle which signified his transition from him to her. Inches from his body are melted off in seconds, as he visibly shrinks before his audience. The shirt that was just the right size has swallowed the girl he has transformed into. At the same time, her breasts push and strain against the fabric, all at once too big and too small.
Senpai
A Ranma ½ Story
Chapter 5/?
|Beating a Dark Horse|
For all the theatrics of the morning, the rest of the school day went by almost entirely uneventfully. Almost entirely, because by lunch, the newly assigned Furinkan Student Council had to be fitted for their new uniforms, the first of what would be sweeping aesthetical changes to the student body of Furinkan High School. After having a look at the new digs, Ranma decided that a school uniform wouldn’t be too bad to wear. Kodachi had a sense of style, or at the very least enough fashion designers on her payroll to simulate a sense of style.
Speaking of Kodachi, Ranma was fairly convinced that he was developing a type in violent/evil/crazy chicks because of her… or perhaps because for the rest of the day she walked around in a leotard that looked more painted on than worn. That wasn’t to say that the other girls he knew so far weren’t lacking. Akane was built like an MMA brawler but in all the right ways, Katie was tall and slender but had flexibility rivalling Kodachi, and Nabiki easily had the most-banging body he’d seen since Misao and himself in the mirror as a girl.
Nice as the scenery was, though, he was still pretty annoyed about being engaged to someone he didn’t know because his old man wanted to mooch off the Tendo family for a bit. There was also the issue of his curse, which he at least wanted a way to reverse if his job as an internet personality didn’t pan.
It was going to, he had no idea how much.
Speaking of his job, there was the matter of making sure his old man got cut out of it as much as possible. Last thing he wanted was his Pop going around acting like he had something to be proud of with these shenanigans–in addition to making sure that he didn’t start living comfortably off his hard work.
“Hey, Katie,” he said to her as the foursome walked from the school and in the direction of the Tendo Dojo. Ranma wasn’t a rude douchebag, he was going to meet the rest of the Tendos before he went right back over to Misao’s to avoid being roped any further into the engagement.
“Yeah?” She replied.
“Think you can help me set up like a bank account or something? I don’t want my old man getting his hands on my income.”
Katie would find that weird, if meeting Ranma didn’t involve driving her heel into the top of Genma’s head at high speed after he beat his child over the head with a road sign. While one of them was a panda and the other a girl, because the panda was a dumbass.
“Shouldn’t be too hard, Misao hooked me up, she’ll do the same for you,” Katie said. “You really want him cut out of your cash, huh?”
“I don’t want him to get a single yen,” Ranma said.
As if he’d heard that, Genma was suddenly tearing across the backyard of the Tendo home, making a straight line for Ranma’s location.
“Club treasurer, huh?” Akane asked Nabiki. “That’ll be a comfortable gig for you.”
Nabiki agreed, especially once she got a look at the budget. The last time she saw that many zeroes line up, they were fighting to ask her sister out. “IT, engineering, and computer clubs, too. Soon as I’m done knocking this out of the park, I’ve got my foot in the door of every economics school in Tokyo.”
She eyed Akane, seeing that she was now carrying a shinai of her own on her back, and a bokken on her hip. “What about you, Kendo Club President? What else did she give you?”
“Girl’s athletics and the other non-athletic clubs, though Kodachi’s responsible for the Gymnastics Clubs.” Akane then hooked a thumb at Ranma. “Ranma’s pretty much in charge of all the Boy’s Athletics. And he’s head of the school’s karate club.”
Ranma folded his arms and nodded.
Nabiki then looked over at Katie. “What about you? Auto club? Shooting club?”
“Discipline committee,” Katie said, pounding her fists together. “I’m the one who busts heads if people act out.”
“When Kuno gets back, he’s going to be in for such a heartbreak,” Nabiki said, “And you know what? I’m fine with that.”
“Sheesh! I gotta meet this Kuno guy, just to see how bad he is for myself,” Ranma then spoke up.
“No you don’t,” Akane, Nabiki, and Katie said as one. This would prove prophetic.
At that moment, a large white blur fell from above, aiming not for Akane, Katie, or Nabiki, but for Ranma. Looking up, Ranma was quick to cross his arms and block the massive overhead chop Genma brought down upon his head. A shockwave spread out from Ranma’s braced feet, followed by the audible, rocky crunch of the sidewalk fracturing underneath him.
“You got a lot of nerve, trying to make a fool of me!" He bellowed.
“I don't have to try to make a fool out of you, pops,” Ranma replied, quickly lashing out with a crescent kick that made his old man back off so they could throw down properly. “You do all the hard work for me!”
Genma adopted a fighting stance of his own after landing. “Don’t think you can just run off and do what you want!”
“I know I can, because I already am!” Ranma said.
“Well I’m your father and you’re going to listen to me good when I say that you’re not picking up this internet gig!” Genma declared as he attacked again, unleashing a barrage of punches, chops and other strikes that Ranma quickly began to counter while returning his own blows.
“Why? Cuz I gotta be a girl while I do it?!” Ranma fired back as he broke the barrage and attempted a spin-kick that Genma smartly dodged.
“Because you know what’s going to happen if word gets out about your damn curse!” Genma yelled back as he swung a punch down for his son’s jaw as he came back around. “No one’s going to take you seriously as a man, ever!”
He missed, because Ranma dove, tumbled between his legs, and hopped right back up on the other side of him, turning around quick and bouncing from one foot to the other.
“You mean the curse-” Ranma dodged another punch when Genma attacked “-that I got-” He avoided another one “-because you ignored the guide?!”
Katie clenched her hand into a fist, and her green eyes narrowed. She just remembered that was a thing.
He stopped Genma’s punch for his face with a kick and then moved it aside to go on the offensive, his blows being smartly defeated by Genma despite their incredible force.
“You don’t want me to make money off this stupid curse! You don’t want me to go back to China to get it cured!” Ranma shouted as he blocked another kick from Genma, his hair blown back by the displaced air. “What do you want from me?!”
“To join the schools!” Genma shouted as he put more force behind his leg, and pushed Ranma back. “That’s all you need to do! Not running around showing off your goods online so people might question if you’re even a man or not!”
Ranma recoiled, before he bristled. “I’m a man! It doesn’t matter what I’ve got in my pants!” He reassumed his fighting stance. “Or on my chest!”
That just made Genma downright surly. "Ungrateful child! You have yet to see the true horror of-”
Katie’s kick connected to the side of Genma's soft head, and he went rocketing into the nearest most adjacent wall–which happened to be the front of the clinic of one Doctor Ono Tofu. The idiot even managed to stand up, dust himself off, take a deep breath and step out of the mess he'd made - but then a flowerpot landed on his head, causing him to land face down on a dropped ice cream cone.
Ranma lowered his hands, seeing the rather embarrassing, but hilarious display. “… 8.5 out of 10.”
“Gimme a second,” Katie said as she got ready.
Genma immediately got back up, pointing at her. “What the hell was that for?! And who are-?!”
Katie jumped and dove for him, prompting Genma to look up at her to see the angle of her attack. Except that this was what Katie was expecting in the first place, because she had deliberately jumped with her back to the sun. Genma was only momentarily blinded by the sun, because Katie’s knee provided all the shade he would need.
Akane and Nabiki both winced from the sheer force that Genma hit the ground after Katie had hit him. Landing next to the second Genma-shaped imprint in the ground, she dusted off her hands, and then her right knee.
“10 out of 10,” Ranma said flatly.
Genma, groaning, looked up as Katie stepped closer to him while speaking, “I don’t know where you think you are, but here in the civilized world we don’t start shit unless we want to get hit.”
“Hey Pop, you’ve met Katie, remember?” Ranma asked. "Her foot disagreed with the back of your head over the whole you taking me by force to the Tendos."
Getting back up, Genma rubbed the back of his head and glared at Katie. “Do you have a problem with how I raise my son, young lady?"
Katie glared at the man, feeling as if something stupid was bound to happen if she let him go unchecked. “If you have to ask, you clearly aren’t as smart as you think you are.”
Genma’s glare intensified, as he prepared to strike the impudent girl down. “Well to that, young lady, I’ve got something to say-”
He should have just attacked, as Katie’s jumping knee sent him flying over the clinic and out of sight, even parting a cloud over head and causing a twinkle in the sky.
“Dead.” Katie declared, making a throat slashing gesture. “Get the fuck out of here.”
“That’s a definite ten.” Akane said, looking at Nabiki with an arched brow.
“9.9, a point off for not breaking the sound barrier.” Nabiki commented, looking over at Ranma. “You keeping your score?”
“I’m biased but anyone who wallops my pop into the atmosphere deserves a ten.” Ranma said, nodding a little. They definitely had to finish that spar soon.
“Oh my, what is going on out here?” the owner of the clinic, the aforementioned Ono Tofu said, emerging from his office to conveniently miss the assault that broke one of his walls.
“Doctor Tofu!” Akane yelped, though she managed to control her usual blushing reaction to him.
He looked down at the Genma-shaped hole in the ground.. “It looks like a grown man fell quite a far ways and hit the sidewalk.” He then looked at the similar imprint on the front of his clinic. “And then in the wall.”
Turning, he scrutinized the group, looking immediately past Katie and Ranma, his calm gaze falling upon Akane.
“Did you do this, Akane-chan?” Tofu asked, his tone neutral and not as accusatory as the question. Akane recoiled, looking a bit hurt regardless of lack of intent behind it.
Katie didn’t like the implications of that question and decided to relieve Akane from the spotlight. “Hey Doc, you don’t have to look at the first person to speak and act like they did it. I did it.”
Akane breathed a sigh of relief and shot Katie a look of thanks. Nabiki, having hoped Akane would make a fool of herself and push herself out of Ranma’s favor, frowned slightly to herself.
“Yeah man,” Ranma said, deciding to back up Akane. “If you can’t look around and take a guess better than just shoving your finger everywhere, then you should keep it to yourself before someone takes exception to it.”
Tofu, taken aback by the double remonstration, studied Katie first and recognized her. That wild animal girl that became Akane’s friend a few weeks ago. He then looked at Ranma and found he didn’t know the boy. “I don’t know you, do I?”
“I just arrived in town the other day, so odds are good you don’t.” Ranma said, crossing his arms all boss like. “The name’s Ranma, Saotome Ranma. Remember it, you’ll be hearing it often.”
The doctor schooled his features well, but a little... something creeped into his voice. “Hmm… is that a fact?”
“Bank on it.” Ranma didn’t back down, staring the man down for a second before he snorted and looked away.
“Now, now,” Katie said, trying to defuse the strangely hostile atmosphere. “Sorry about your wall, an idiot decided he wanted to take a header into it.”
“Oh it’s no bother, damage to the clinic happens all the time.” Tofu said, doing his best to appear cheerful.
“Doctor...?” Akane whispered to herself, feeling out of sorts seeing the nice and cheerful man so... out of character from what she knew of him. Something about Ranma had set something off in the good doctor.
Nabiki saw her chance to look good and took it. “Yeah, it’s a shame but we gotta go. Ranma wanted to see the dojo and you two still got to go back to your place for business right?”
Four sets of eyes trained themselves on her and the differing reactions in each filled Nabiki with a nice sort of feeling. Akane was disbelieving that Nabiki wasn’t accelerating the issue, Ranma was all like hey I forgot about that, Katie was neutral with some kind of hidden emotion and the good doctor was… annoyed? Weird.
Anyway, that seemed to break the tension as Tofu reluctantly nodded. “Well as long as you don’t want to destroy my office, it’s fine. Have a nice day.”
The foursome heading to the dojo all said their goodbyes and headed on their way.
Akane pulled Nabiki back for a second. “What are you doing?”
“What do you think I’m doing?” Nabiki asked, smirk evident as she didn’t try to hide her ulterior motives.
“Just watch it will you?” Akane said, glowering at her sister.
“Watch what? You eat my dust?” Nabiki returned, smirk deepening into a grin.
“Oi, come on you two!” Katie called, preventing things from going further.
“Coming!” Nabiki answered, moving to catch up with Katie and Ranma.
Akane just glared at her sister’s back for a long second, before moving along to catch up.
|Demons and Killers|
“I don’t like that guy,” Katie muttered of Dr, Tofu the moment they were out of earshot of the clinic.
She wasn’t out of earshot of Akane, who seemed as offended by the stance as Dr. Tofu would. “Why, Senpai? He’s always been nice…”
Until today, at least, she couldn’t understand why he seemed so irritated by Ranma. It was just a miscommunication, that was all.
Ranma had an idea. “The first thing he did when he saw the damage done, he blamed it on you.”
“Well that’s because Akane has a reputation of getting into fights,” Nabiki informed.
“So do I,” Katie and Ranma said together.
“Heck, that jerk should’ve been blaming me from the start,” Ranma added.
“On top of that, he sounded like he was making a joke,” Katie said.
Nabiki did concede to that. “That is his sense of humor when it comes to property damage. Until you guys came along, Akane pretty much was the only one who could do that kind of stuff.”
Ranma looked at Akane, impressed. “Really?”
“Once, when she was twelve, she flipped a food truck because the guy stiffed her.”
Akane seemed to brood darkly with that. “That takoyaki was awful and he didn’t give me my change.”
Nabiki nodded. “On the bright side, he’d been scamming people all day with that, so everything worked out.”
“That’s fair, then,” Katie judged. “I’ve done more than my share of dispensing justice.”
Ranma agreed as he immediately recalled his own brush with vigilantism. “Yeah, me too. There was this one jackass, a grown man, who conned my friend and a bunch of other kids out of their money by beating them in card games. I rolled him up in straw and threw him in a river.”
He failed to mention that he lost all of his own money, his Dad’s money, his Dad’s belongings, his house, and his Dad’s marriage to his Mom in the process. But since Ranma beat him up and threw him in a river, it was nothing to be concerned about, he won, that was that. Forever.
“Serves him right,” Akane said.
“Did he die?” Nabiki inquired.
Ranma just raised and dropped his shoulders. “Hell if I know, he never came back after me an’ Ucchan were done with him..”
It must have been humiliating to be beaten up by a pair of children. Katie didn’t feel even the tiniest bit of sympathy for him. “Well if he did, he earned it.”
Akane looked ahead and could see the front of the dojo coming up into view. “Well, at least we’re almost home.”
Nabiki smiled a little in that sardonic fashion that made you feel like she was having a joke at your expense but you couldn’t ever prove it. “Such as it is. I’m sure our visitors will love to see the dojo.”
Ranma’s eyes lit up at the mention of the dojo. “Wow, it’s been… years since I last stepped foot in a dojo.”
Akane smiled before she sighed. “I’d like to say it’s a proper dojo but...” She trailed off, looking rather chagrined by that.
“Daddy hasn’t taught in years.” Nabiki finished, looking just as chagrined.
Katie interrupted before Ranma could speak. “You call your dad… daddy?” She expected it out of Akane but Nabiki? It just didn’t fit.
Ranma didn’t say anything because he didn’t really know anything about Nabiki or Akane or their father for that matter. But it did sound weird that such a cold girl would use such a sweet word. And funny, but he controlled his laughter.
Nabiki glowered but refused to rise to the barb, instead choosing to turn her nose up with a rather indignant “HMPH!”
Akane giggled a little. “Anyways, it’ll be good to have you over when you need to practice.”
“And someone to practice with huh?” Nabiki asked, tone arching like her eyebrow.
Akane didn’t rise to the bait, mainly because they were there. And also because that’s what Nabiki wanted. “Well, we’re here. Is Kasumi cooking right now?”
Ranma found his spot to get back into the discussion. “Kasumi?”
“Oh right, you haven’t met her yet. She’s our older sister.” Nabiki said, suddenly not seeming as hot to trot about everything.
“She’s very nice.” Katie said, as diplomatically as she could. “You’ll like her cooking, if nothing else.”
“A real homebody huh?” Ranma asked, not sure how he felt about that.
Akane laughed nervously, deciding it was time to change the topic before things made the two of them look really bad. “Well you’ll meet her eventually, but let’s get to the dojo. I’m sure you’ll want a tour!”
“Sounds like a great idea, Kasumi’s probably too busy right now.” Nabiki said, trying her best to keep her composure.
Katie arched an eyebrow, but after a few seconds of thought, she could understand how they were both feeling less than adequate with their smoking hot older sister looming in the wings. “We didn’t get to finish our spar and this might be our best chance to finish it.” She threw the sisters a lifeline, one that was sure to add any brownie points she might have already earned with them.
Ranma, sensing that there was no point in pursuing the Kasumi topic, went with the change. “Yeah, I really do want to see which of us is better.”
“Try not to obliterate the building please.” Nabiki said, her tone almost pleading. “You can break a few boards, crack a hole in one of the walls but at least try to leave it standing. Minor repairs don’t rock the boat but something major could sink us.”
Akane, remembering the mini-tornado from earlier, could only nod in agreement. “Yeah, that’d be real bad.” She may not have been greedy like her sister but she didn’t want to funnel any new found income into rebuilding the dojo.
Katie and Ranma just exchanged a short look and shrug. “We’ll try to be careful, but don’t be afraid to bill my roommate for any damages, for real.”
“Does she cover all of your shenanigans?” Nabiki asked.
Katie nodded. “She even paid for that clock I broke. That was like a drop in the bucket for her.”
“I see,” Nabiki said in a cooler tone than her usual.
“Still, try to keep it down, okay?” Akane said as they came in through the front door.
“RANMA!” An exuberant Soun Tendo greeted them, but specifically him, as soon as they were through the threshold. “Welcome to the Tendo Dojo, son!”
The patriarch of the Tendo family came right up to the foursome, beaming brightly when he finally got a look at the young man one of his daughters would certainly marry. “I see that you at the very least don’t take after your father in the looks department. Which is good, very good, right girls?”
“Uh, thanks?” Ranma replied.
Nabiki keenly nodded. “Not that I’m a shallow girl…”
“You absolutely are,” Katie muttered in English.
“… But at least be thankful that you might not grow up to look like your old man,” She went on to suggest.
Soun strolled up and hooked an arm around Ranma’s shoulder. “So, how about my daughters, eh? Lookers aren’t they?”
“They’re pretty nice people, yeah,” Ranma quickly corrected him.
“Just you wait until Kasumi gets home,” Soun went on, as if not hearing him. “She’s a darling girl, loves to cook, and is sharp as a blade. She likes to play humble, but I’ve caught her reading those medical books she picks up from Tofu time to time.”
Akane hummed. “Where is Kasumi?”
“She went out this morning as soon as you left to get some errands done,” Soun replied. “She said she’d be gone most of the day.”
Nabiki immediately narrowed her eyes. Kasumi was pretty sharp, and if she was willing to vanish for the whole day that meant she had a plan of her own. A quick glance in Ranma’s direction made her pretty certain what she was up to.
“Well, that’s all right. I was here to check out the dojo, anyway,” Ranma said.
Soun nodded. “Of course, of course. Feel free to stay for dinner, as well! This is your home now, after all.”
“Actually… I’m just visiting, I have to go to work after this…” Plus he wasn’t keen on staying the night at the Tendos given that he might wake up at the altar the next morning tied down. Nothing against the girls, it was the whole Dad factor. “Plus I don’t want to be a strain on your food supply…”
Katie shrugged her shoulders. “Misao let you in the house at all, so our couch is your couch.”
Soun didn’t care for Ranma being in such close proximity to girls that weren’t his daughters about as much as Genma didn’t care for him working as a girl. “Nonsense, nonsense, you should stay here from now on. This is eventually going to be yours, after all.”
“Uh, thanks but…” Ranma stopped when he noticed that Soun was beginning to manifest a rather large menacing aura. It was downright demonic, dark and filled with an anger barely contained by Soun’s mockery of civility.
“Okay… that’s actually a little intimidating,” Ranma thought
“Is there something wrong with my daughters that makes you uncomfortable, Saotome? Is all that I am giving you not good enough? Is my generosity and hospitality lacking in some way?” Soun asked as he advanced upon Ranma a bit more, looming over him with an almost fully demonic air about him.
Ranma actually took a step back, hesitant to go onto his guard, but at the same time quick to seek out a way from being in this situation.
“Daddy, stop!” Akane said quickly. “If Ranma doesn’t want to stay, then that’s fine!”
Soun paid it no heed. “Well, Ranma?! What exactly is your problem with this arrangement-!”
He then stopped, and drew back from Ranma a full five paces. Directly behind Ranma, Akane, and Nabiki, Katie was staring directly at Soun, her eyes dull despite the murderous intent they drilled into him. He skin crawled, as if he could feel her hands clamping around his neck.
Reaching up, she then brushed some hair from her face. “Oi, isn’t that a bit rude? Bad enough he got dragged here by force, but you have to treat him like it’s his fault for not wanting to stay, too?”
Akane agreed wholeheartedly. “That’s what I mean, Ranma’s not going to want to marry anyone if you treat him like this, Daddy!”
Soun, a lot meeker (and suddenly extremely wary of the wild girl glaring at him), tried to put up a token defense. “It’s his responsibility to…”
“He didn’t even know it was his responsibility until yesterday! None of us knew!” Akane shot back.
“Akane has a point,” Nabiki pointed out. “We didn’t get any warning about this at all, nice as Ranma is.”
She looked to the side, feigning sorrow. “I mean, how awful is it? To be treated like a commodity to be traded and sold at our own father’s whim?”
She turned completely around, microphone in hand, and a spotlight shining down upon her. “With no say in our own destinies, we exist not as people but as mere trading stock! A resource to tap for wealth and prosperity and escaping a bill!”
Akane, who had a rather excellent history of stage performance, swooned and fell to her knees dramatically into the spotlight, just behind her sister. One hand rested on her knee, the other at her mouth as she wept. “How awful, to be betrayed by father…”
Soun was soundly defeated by this impromptu improv performance, the arrows of guilt having rammed deep through his body and into his soul. They were bigger, heftier arrows than they ought to be, though, as if there was some kind of unspoken and weighty validation behind them that was yet to be revealed… until right now: Picolet Chardin.
Bawling in contrition, Soun threw himself down to their feet. “I’m sorry! I’m sorry! Please take your time to get acclimated to us! Don’t think us Tendo family as awful people!”
“Eh, all right,” Ranma said. “I’ll accept your apology if you show us to the dojo.”
Soun was his jovial self in a second. “Of course, right this way my boy!”
As he turned away to lead them down the hall to the dojo, however, Soun developed a more serious look and darted it out the corner of his eye towards Katie. His demonic aura of intimidation was one that only his master could really resist, but it was ultimately a bluff for scaring off opponents to buy time for an escape, a counterattack or both. That girl’s look… those eyes… there was no bluffing there.
“I should discuss this with Saotome, that girl has a killer’s eyes…” He thought to himself.
Katie stepped up to Ranma and gently nudged his shoulder. “Hey, Ranma.”
“Yeah?” He asked when he looked at her.
“Get ready,” she said with a noticeably smile now. “When we get in there, I’m going to give you a real treat.”
Well now Ranma was plain ol’ curious. “A treat, huh?”
Katie nodded and looked forward to the dojo. Her blood was heated up again already, and once they were out on the floor, it would be boiling.
|A Glimpse of Heaven|
In the dojo, Katie’s school uniform came off, revealing underneath a pair of red bicycle shorts and a black and red sports top. Cracking her neck, and stretching to pop her back and shoulders, she turned and looked across the floor of the dojo, where Ranma stood with Soun. The two were standing side by side, with Ranma doing his own stretches and limbering up for the fight. Between them, Nabiki and Akane sat on the sidelines, wearing face visors to protect from splinters.
“Well, hopefully it won’t be interrupted this time,” Akane said, quite eager to see how long Ranma could last against her senpai.
“We can only hope.” Nabiki was more interested in seeing Akane’s senpai being used as a mop to wax the floor with her blood.
Over by Ranma, Soun was still quite contrite as he spoke in a low voice. “I’m sorry for the manner with which I behaved before, but I think you should hear me out, son.”
“Don’t call me son, but what is it?” Ranma asked as he stretched to touch his foot to the back of his head, prompting Nabiki to bite her lower lip.
“Be careful against that girl, there’s something… unseemly about her,” Soun said gently, “She’s got a menacing air about her.”
“She just doesn’t tolerate nonsense,” Ranma deflected. “She punted Pops into the next town over for his.”
Soun recoiled. “She did what?!”
“But that’s okay. Besides, I’ve fought her before, I know what I’m in for.”
He actually didn’t, as he would find out in but a moment as Katie called over to him. “So! Since we were interrupted this morning right when it was getting good, I think we should change it up a bit to get right back into the swing of it.”
Ranma paused. “Oh yeah, what did you have in mind?”
Katie smiled and stepped up to the edge of the floor reserved for fighting. “I’m going to show you a little bit of my Uncle’s fighting style. The one I’ve been trained most in since I was four.”
That was unexpected. “… You mean you haven’t?”
This was news to Akane too. “Your Uncle has a fighting style?”
Katie nodded. “Yep, I’ve used it off and on, but I roll so much other stuff on top of it, that I never have a chance to go back to basics. And Ranma here is so good, that I wanna give him my best. ‘Course, that means we'll have to change the rules from first to hit wina to first to yield loses.”
Ranma was fine with that. “Depends on if you can hit me.”
“Oh, I will.” She looked to Akane and winked. “Pay close attention, you might learn a thing or two.”
Akane felt a little chagrined by the teasing but she let it slide. She would be lying hardcore if she said she wasn’t excited to see her senpai’s absolute best. “I will.”
Katie turned her attention to Ranma, and the smile on her face turn feral. There was no flirtation to the expression, just pure battle mania. As though the prospect of the fight alone was bringing her-
“Pleasure, that’s what this spar is to her. Is she out for blood or what?” There was no worries in Ranma’s mind as he sauntered out to the floor. He had grown up in the wild and knew what to do when it came to beasts who lived to bite. “If she thinks she can just sink her fangs into me, she has another thing coming.”
He stopped across from her, sliding down into a stance that was reminiscent of Jeet Kune Do. “Ready when you are.”
Katie threw a few more punches to the side, away from Ranma, before pulling herself up into the basic stance of what appeared to be Muay Thai. Her right leg was leading just a little, her right clearly intended to be her jabbing hand.
Akane raised an eyebrow. “Thai boxing...?”
Nabiki frowned, feeling like the tease wasn’t being delivered on. “That’s not it, is it?”
Ranma narrowed his eyes and studied his opponent for a long second. “The more I look at it, the more it looks ever so slightly off. It’s not just Thai boxing... probably.” He kept his cool and smirked. “So? We doing this or what?” Deep down, he had already catalogued nearly all the ways she could attack him and how he could counter. If it was just Thai boxing, this would be over quickly.
Katie just chuckled. “I’m ready now. Do you want first move?”
“Ladies first.” His face was filled with egotistical condescension, clearly spoiling his motive to irritate her.
“Don’t regret it now~?” She replied, before firing off a right jab at high speed that sliced the air apart.
From Ranma’s perspective, it wasn’t so much a punch as it was a harpoon fired at him. From what he knew of Muay Thai, that was too fast and placed wrong. Still, he dodged it, looking like it required no effort. He fired back a left cross that was slapped aside, followed by a right front kick that was slipped. “She’s already faster than earlier. Already revved up and going full throttle despite the long cooldown. What a monster.” That was okay, he was a monster too.
She dipped into a right elbow that seemed like it was trying to blow through Ranma and kill the guy that was figuratively behind him.
Ranma slid away from the elbow and noted again that the placement was wrong. In normal Thai boxing, that would be more towards the head, not towards the sternum. Such placement significantly increased the chance for an agonizing injury, if not death. “The force and speed behind it are even more than usual. This isn’t the Thai boxing used for sport, this is the real deal.”
Soun’s eyes narrowed as the two teens circled each other. “A killer’s eyes and a killer’s style. It is as I feared.” He thought, recognizing the style immediately. “You’ve noticed, haven’t you son? She isn’t using Muay Thai, but its progenitor Muay Boran. A true art of violence, designed to reign supreme on the most savage battlefield known as war.”
Ranma nodded his head and went in, throwing a series of punches that left minute openings. They were all blocked or slipped, not a single baited hook reeled in a fished for counter. “She’ll bite when she wants to, no amount of trying to get her to counter will work eh? Fine by me.”
Katie furrowed her brow in concentration. “I get the feeling he still isn’t taking me seriously. Let’s change that.” She reared back and threw forth a bomb of a left that almost hummed in the air for his face.
Ranma jerked his head back just in the nick of time, feeling the puff of displaced air as her arm reached the end of its reach. Intriguing, she was throwing fast and hard without sacrificing either. “Game on huh? Message received loud and clear.”
He shot forward, charging inside her reach and firing his own blow for her liver. It whiffed, and Ranma narrowly blocked a quick series of strikes, the offensive beating him back before an opening appeared in Katie’s guard that he decisively exploited, ducking down onto one hand while thrusting a kick up at her chin.
Katie weaved back from the kick, but her attempted roundhouse kick to punish her inverted opponent missed as Ranma sprung himself off his hands and directly above her, planting his feet on the ceiling.
“Oh!” Akane and Nabiki exclaimed, before Ranma came down on Katie, first seemingly tumbling to swing his own heel down onto her head. When she smartly raised her arms to block, he twisted his entire body like a cat avoiding falling onto her and getting the opening he needed to kick her in the chest as he caught himself on one hand.
“How did he do that?!” Katie thought as pain echoed through her chest. Those reflexes were incredible!
As she caught herself, Ranma hopped off his hand and landed on his feet. He could see Katie was smiling despite her taking a hit. That just compelled him to hit her hard enough to knock that grin off her face. “The Saotome School of Indiscriminate Grappling specializes in aerial combat. It doesn’t matter what position I’m in, I can always attack!”
He demonstrated thusly rushing straight for Katie and lashing out with a kick that she blocked with her right arm. Rather than go back, Ranma went up, jumping off her raised arm and then rebounding off the ceiling to kick downward. Katie sidestepped the blow, and fired off a swift right hook that went through the speed lines Ranma left behind as he leaped past her, only to abruptly twist himself around and spin kick her in the back.
She was just fast enough to turn and bring her right shoulder and sloppily raised forearm to block the hit, but lost her footing as Ranma rebounded right back to the ceiling and this time dashed right over her head and towards the nearest wall.
“He’s all over the place!” Katie thought as Ranma kicked off it and fell upon her, the momentum helping his punch as she brought up both hands to block it. With even quicker leg work, he deluged her with a total of three kicks, the last one he used to spring off her. “So fast, too!”
Ranma’s feet finally touched the floor, a smile of his own as he sized up Katie’s style. Defensively she was a fortress, nearly impossible to get off her footing, and fast in a straight line. However, she didn’t have much counter for his agility that he could see. It was time to hammer that weak point until it broke.
In the space of that assessment, Ranma’s full weight had yet to hit the floor, and when it did he was off again, every microsecond dedicated to plotting out potential routes for his next series of strikes and possible counters. Katie had a million ways to stop him, but he had a million and one.
Though in actuality, Katie had a million and two.
As he took off the ground again, this time to kick, he saw it: the Muay Boran stance shifted again, both feet planting as she adopted a stance more suited for grappling than striking. But what was most important, was that she opened her guard completely for the attack.
And it was at this moment that Ranma knew… he fucked up.
Ranma’s flying spin kick didn’t even connect, as Katie lunged into it and, as his leg grazed her side, snatched him out of the air by the front of his shirt at the shoulder with one hand. The rest of her arm went right across his chest, his own momentum turning the strike into a devastating lariat as his course reversed and then went straight down into the floor.
Akane gasped at the sight of Ranma being plucked clean out of the air and driven into the floor like an American Football in the endzone. Bouncing off the floor, Ranma caught himself on his hands and feet and sprang away from Katie, but as he attempted to set down she was closing in, her eyes locked squarely on him as she lashed out and caught his right arm in her right hand.
“Whoa…!” Nabiki gasped.
Akane leaned forward, amazed. “That grappling…”
Counter the grab, use it against her. That’s what he tried to do before he could even think it, but his footing was completely absent to do any of that as she pulled him into her, and they met at her knee and his solar plexus, the force of the blow knocking the wind out of him as he was raised higher off the floor.
Through the pain, Ranma realized something shocking. “She’s… faster…!”
Soun narrowed his eyes. “You need to escape her hold, Ranma!”
He attempted to regain his footing, but his arm was arrested, still clamped tightly in her right hand. It was time to go unorthodox! He immediately brought his whole body up, wrapping his arms around hers and hooking his legs over her shoulder, taking her arm and extending it into an armbar.
“He’s got her!” Soun said.
Nabiki threw forth a fist. “Yeah! Go get her, Ranma! Break her arm off!”
Surprised by Ranma’s counter, Katie staggered a bit, before she planted her feet, keeping her arm held out and Ranma held up above the floor. She could feel the strain and pressure Ranma placed on her joints and muscles.
Soun nodded as he observed the move. It was textbook, yet unorthodox, the very form of Indiscriminate Grappling. “You’ve taught him well, Saotome. This boy is worthy to succeed us!”
Katie looked over at Ranma, who grinned defiantly, before she returned the smile. If he was good enough to get her in an armbar, then escaping it wasn’t going to be easy. However… if things were easy, she wouldn’t have him deemed him worthy of Heaven.
She crouched, bending at the knees while still holding his arm straight out, leaped upward, striking Ranma directly against one of the beams supporting the roof of the dojo. The blow shoved him into the ceiling, crumpling him against the ceiling and effectively freeing her from the lock. To his complete disbelief.
“She…!” Ranma thought as both began to fall.
“… Broke…!” Soun gasped, as Katie shoved Ranma below her and began to turn in the air.
“… Out!” Akane said right before Katie connected not her tibia, not her knee, but her elbow–driving it into his sternum.
The floor shattered in a wide circle from the force of the blow.
Ranma then rammed into the center of the circle, bouncing off it as it shattered and splintered from the second impact.
The last thing Ranma saw before everything went black was Katie hanging in the air above him, a murderous smile on her black-hair framed face.
The last thought he had… was that he needed to know how to beat that.
“Ranma!” All three Tendos present cried, coming over to stand at the edge of the broken floor.
Katie landed just outside the edge of the hole, peering down at the fallen Saotome.
Akane knelt down, checking on the condition of the pigtailed boy. That blow had been tremendous, maybe even harder than Kuno had been struck when he was sent through the clock tower. Her body trembled at the sight of her senpai’s power but it wasn’t out of fear. She was excited to see someone so powerful, so skilled present in her dojo. It made her want to get good enough to fight Katie on the level Ranma had.
For the first time in years, she had a goal to pursue in the art and it felt amazing.
Nabiki stared at the black haired girl, disbelief evident on her face. She didn’t think Ranma was invincible but seeing him in action only to be swatted aside like that just shocked her all the more. It reminded her that this girl was her age, her own classmate no less, and yet they were so far apart it was like they were polar opposites.
Was she invincible? Was that it? Could no one beat her? The spike of disbelief deepened itself into a burning flame of envy. Why was it that she was denied these gifts and talents? Why was yet another example of how feeble and weak she was staring her in the face, only it was someone who wasn’t entirely a goody little two-shoes about it?
She almost clenched her hands into fists but thought better of it.
“He’s alive, but out cold.” Soun announced, having been the one to go down in amongst the broken floorboards and tatami to check on the son of his dear friend. The boy was magnificent, but that girl... she was something else.
“I wasn’t trying to kill him and he’s too hearty for that to hurt him for long.” Katie said, schooling her features into a confident smirk at the Tendo Patriarch. “I could tell from hitting him that if I didn’t do something big, he’d just absorb my hits and keep coming. Can’t stop a charging elephant with love taps y’know.”
Soun narrowed his eyes in contemplation, before he let her words go. “I guess I can’t fault you too much for that. He was going to break your arm if you tried a more conventional attempt at escaping.”
Both of his daughters looked to their father, slightly shocked at that. They were both escalating the spar that much.
“We can’t fault her for fighting to the best of her abilities.” Akane said, looking down at Ranma, noticing that he was breathing if a little shallowly.
“Ranma-kun did seem to be going full bore too.” Nabiki allowed, doing her best to not look at Katie.
“Should probably leave him there for a little bit, just to let him recover.” Katie said, crouching down at the edge of the hole. “Moving him too soon is bad.”
“Let’s not dump cold water on him either. The shock might cause problems.” Soun added, still silently measuring this dangerous animal girl. Yes, animal, a good descriptor. She hungered to bite and tear at flesh, that elbow had surely shown that. That uncle of hers must have been a real monster to do this to her.
It would turn out that he had forgotten that lies exist because the truth hurts so much more.
|Some Kind of Woman|
Time had passed, but how much was not known to the waking mind of Ranma Saotome. What he did know was that he smelled food and now was the time to figure out the rest. He was sprawled out on a futon, a damp towel on his forehead to control his body temperature. His eyes cracked open, pain from the light stinging his eyes. He looked around and realized this must be the family room of the Tendo House, they must have moved him here after he had been knocked out.
Knocked out, which meant he had lost the spar. He hadn’t underestimated her at all, he just didn’t have enough data to ensure a proper measurement. He hadn’t ever really met someone who could match, if not surpass, him in speed. It was an eye opening experience, one he’d have to revisit as he started training again.
He did something ill-advised and sat up, the room swirling for a second as he gasped for air
“Oh you shouldn’t do that!” A soft voice called from just out of his view, from behind him. It sounded warm and comforting, like a sweater on a chilly day. He didn’t recognize this one, their mom?
“I’m okay, I’m used to this.” He bluffed, trying his best to be reassuring. He closed his eyes, as a pair of hands with well manicured nails gently took his shoulders and lowered his head back down not onto a pillow but to on a warm, soft lap.
“I grew up in a dojo and in this town and I know injuries when I see them.” The voice took on a sharper quality, she sounded peeved at his bravado. “But you’re already up so just stay still.” There was an edge of warning in her voice, one he decided to obey.
“Yeah, sorry. I’m not good at following the rules, y’know?” He replied, a rhetorical shrug and a verbal grin dancing merrily along the words.
The woman huffs in amusement, before she spoke again. Her voice was directly above him. “I can see that.”
Ranma opened his eyes and froze as if he had been ran through with a lightning bolt. If all the girls he had seen so far were all sorts of crazy hot, he had just tripped over a downright goddess of pure hotness. Her long brown hair started straight down to her chin, before it became a beautiful display of curls down to her mid back. She was wearing a pink sweater over a cream-colored button-down shirt and a pair of tight blue capris. She had such grace and style that stole the sarcastic quip right out of his mouth, crumples it up and feeds it back to him in the form of a fat tongue knotted up in amazement.
“Uh... hi.” It wasn’t shy in the least, he was just too stunned to form any kind of added emotion.
“Yes, hello.” She said, giving a little bow. “I’m Kasumi, Nabiki-chan and Akane-chan’s older sister.”
“Sister!?” The word echoed in sheer disbelief through his mind, before he decided to speak. “I’m Ranma... Ranma Saotome.”
“It’s a pleasure, though I had hoped our first meeting would have been better.” Kasumi said, a brief pout crossing her face.
Ranma almost forgot himself for a second, but he caught himself. “Well, it’s better than me being drug her against my will.” He tried humor to recover, but this proved to be an unwise move.
Kasumi laughed and Ranma felt like getting put through the floor of the dojo was a small price to pay to witness such a thing.
Her laughter attracted company, as Katie popped up from somewhere else in the house. “Hey I, uh… wanted to check on him, see if he was okay and all...”
Ranma’s eyes narrowed at the bashful way Katie was acting, but being around Kasumi really did seem to excuse it a tiny bit.
“He’s apparently fine, Katie-chan.” Kasumi said, smiling at the girl. There’s a tickling warmth in the tone, which proceeded to melt Katie’s insides.
Ranma forgot all about excusing the bashfulness and focused on the swell of jealousy deep within himself at that moment.
“That’s... that’s uh, really great!” Katie managed, her face has turned a bright red at this point. She turned around and called back into the house. “Oi! You two, he’s awake!”
More footsteps followed and soon Akane and Nabiki joined them. Without prompting, he began to compare the sisters to Kasumi and found that it wasn’t quite as much as a wash-out for the eldest he had subconsciously been thinking. All three had their best sides that appealed to him in a fashion that outdid the others and oh lord he was about to become some kind of sick pervert.
“How you feeling champ?” Nabiki asked, trying to be neutral and hide her concern in addition to her contempt for Kasumi’s fantastic makeover. He couldn’t see it but the way she said it seems like she had been chewing on her lips right before she spoke.
“Like I got knocked through a floor.” He returned with a light bit of levity. He smiled to defuse any offense taken from the comment. “Nah, outside of my pride, I’m fine. I’m used to aches and pains by this point.” They usually took the form of his father after all.
“That’s good!” Akane said, all cute and bubbly. Her voice wafts through the room like a warm breeze, where upon it does a dance across Ranma’s brain. It reminded him of ingesting a sugarcube after having a lemon wedge. All fizzy and electric, leaving behind a dizzying rush that reminded you what it was like to be alive.
“Because it’d be bad otherwise right?” Katie teased, and Ranma found that he wasn’t as on guard around her anymore. He had finally quantified the discomfort and thus he could be passively aware of the danger she posed instead of actively alert.
“C’mon Senpai, you know what I meant!” Akane wailed in mock distress, drawing a laugh from both girls.
“Anyways,” Nabiki’s cool voice butted in now, serving as a soothing balm to the rising irritation at the by-play happening before him. “Katie called her roommate and explained things about the spar, so you have a little bit of a grace period to eat dinner before heading over.” From the angry squeak Akane gave, it was apparent she had been scooped on delivering the good news.
“Wouldn’t want to show up late to work without an explanation.” Ranma muttered, before looking down at the futon. “Is it okay for me to get up now?”
Kasumi nodded. “As long as you’re not dizzy anymore.”
He slowly lifted his head from her lap, and he was reintroduced to the lingering burn of pain where Katie’s elbow had met his sternum. Nothing else would have put him down for the count like that, something she had somehow determined over the course of their two spars. Interesting, something else to consider later. “So when’s dinner?”
“In just a few, there was a sale on beef today.” Kasumi answered and Ranma could feel a chill in the air at that.
“Well lucky me I guess.” He ignored the frostiness and sniffed the air. “Smells great!”
“It’s more western fare,” Kasumi said as she rose back to her feet. “Since Katie-chan’s come to visit, I’ve been curious to try it.”
On that note she looked to Katie. “I’m just about finished with it, but would you mind helping me out a bit with some finishing touches?”
“Uh? Sure,” Katie said, before looking over to Ranma and flashing him a smile. “Hey man, sorry for putting you into the floor like that.”
Ranma, though feeling the sting of defeat, brushed it off. “One of us was going through it, I just wished it wasn’t me.”
Reassuringly, Katie decided to pay him a compliment. “That armbar was brilliant, and I didn’t want to take any chances with the usual outs. I probably would’ve had my arm ripped out my socket ten different ways.”
“Twenty,” Ranma corrected, though it was actually one hundred and three at last count. One hundred four now, though–he would remember Katie’s creative counter.
Katie smiled, just before Kasumi called to her. “Katie-chan, I could really use a hand on this.”
Huffing in amusement, she turned for the kitchen. “All right, all right…” She looked back over to Ranma and smiled. “We’ll do this again soon though, that whole fight was too good.”
And with that she was gone, and Ranma turned to find Nabiki and Akane waiting for them to join him at the sitting table. Soun was just outside the room on the home’s patio, leaning against a post and smoking a cigarette. He appeared to be in deep contemplation.
“Geez,” he said as he rubbed his chest, “I expected great things… but that was something else entirely.”
“I don’t think any less of you for losing,” Nabiki revealed to Ranma. “You’ll get her next time.”
Ranma smirked. “You’re damn right I will.”
Akane then not so discreetly slid a glass of water that had been on her side of the table, right up to Nabiki. A quick look at it and the realization that followed granted the much more discreetly smirking Akane a brief glare of grudging respect from her older sister.
“I would temper your eagerness to fight her again, Ranma-kun,” Soun said.
Ranma looked over at Soun. “What?”
Soun took a drag from his cigarette, and exhaled a long cloud of smoke visible in the orange glow of the descending sun. “That girl… she’s not a normal martial artist. There’s so much anger and aggression there.” He turned and gave Ranma a dramatic look. “If you fight her again, and push her too far, she will kill you.”
"Daddy! Don't say that kind of thing about Katie-senpai, especially behind her back!"
Soun shook his head sadly. "I'm not saying anything terrible about her, but rather the one who trained her in the first place. Whoever it was, they have instilled within her a lust for battle and blood that is unhealthy outside only the most vicious battlefield. Lurking beneath your friend's exterior is a rabid wolf on a rusty chain. Ranma. If you fight her again, she will go for far more lethal blows without even meaning to."
Nabiki, while not a fighter, was certainly not ignorant of the world of fighting thanks to growing up in it. “Daddy has a point.”
Ranma folded his arms. “She won’t kill anyone, not on purpose or on accident.”
Soun couldn’t see that, not with the menace and brutality in her moves against Ranma, or what he heard of from her fight with Kuno.
“If she wanted blood, she could’ve gotten it,” he said, “All she had to do was drag out the fight until we beat on each other enough for there to be blood.”
He gave Akane a reassuring look. “She ain’t no killer or a psycho or anything… she just gets off on fighting.”
Akane recoiled a bit, a blush appearing on her face at the very context of Ranma’s statement. “G-gets off…?”
Soun disagreed. “That wasn’t mere excitement for a fight, don’t mistake it as such.”
“She’s a hardcore adrenaline junkie,” Ranma assessed. “She acts really cool and detached, but I saw it both times we fought–the better her opponent, the more excited she gets, and I impressed her so much that she showed me something that I want to beat, and I’m going to beat it.” He smiled. “I couldn’t call myself a martial artist or a man if I didn’t accept that challenge.”
Nabiki picked up the glass of water and took a sip from it, mostly to cool her face from Ranma’s boast.
Akane herself then remembered their very first spar, and the smile that was on Katie’s face after she had put her into the wall. Suddenly she found herself wondering what would’ve happened had Sasuke not interrupted the spar. Their spars after had been somewhat lower intensity after that, more exercise to keep in shape than pushing limits… but that was going to change.
Soun still wasn’t swayed, but unlike Genma he wasn’t going to fight the boy over his opinion. “Be careful then, Ranma. Whichever of us is right, I dread what sort of terrible thing she might do if she becomes too excited.”0
If there was anyone who had a good idea of what a motivated Katie could get up to, it was Kasumi of all people, who let out a giggle as she overheard Soun’s dread-filled statement over the eager kiss she shared with Katie, who was embracing her from behind at the counter next to the stove, where dinner simmered for its final minutes of preparation.
“Mm… what’s so funny?” Katie whispered as she broke the kiss.
Kasumi smiled vibrantly as her right cheek was nuzzled tenderly by the foreigner’s left. “That I’m doing such a terrible thing.”
Katie, who had also heard it, grinned back and nuzzled lower, towards Kasumi’s neck. “You could do so much worse.”
She emphasized that by sliding her hands, which had been at her trim waist, down to her hips and giving them an appreciative squeeze. Kasumi responded with an excited sigh, and slipped her own right hand up to caress the right side of Katie’s face. “Sounds like fun.”
Katie giggled herself, and went right back to helping Kasumi with some finishing touches.
|How to Girl… Period|
“BansheeDeadSix here, and welcome to the Debrief, where I spend ten seconds of a two minute news report introducing the two minute news report.” In her now studio-style lit living room, Misao stood, rather than sat, in front of a camera tripod, her back to a mural featuring a P-47D Thunderbolt with a rainbow haired blue pegasus painted on its fuselage slashing through the air past an exploding Messerschmitt Me 262 jet fighter, the former plane’s wing-mounted eight machine guns blazing fire.
She, dressed more professionally in a black top and blue jean skirt, looked at her watch. “And that’s it.”
Looking back up at the camera, Misao spoke. “First off, Pokémon. The Pokémon Company released images of the starters for Pokémon Sun and Moon, and already I don’t care for the grass and water starters because CUTE FIRE CAT OH. MY GOD. Game of the Year, and I say this with confidence after playing SuperHot, Souls 3, and Overwatch.”
She then brightened. “Speaking of, the Overwatch Beta was a smashing success! With thousands queueing for hours to enjoy thirty seconds of getting fucked by Bastion players before the connection drops. Your very own Banshee spent the entire first day of the Beta making Zenyatta her handsome robo husbando, and Widowmaker her ice cold waifu–and every Tracer salty. You can see clips of that in the link to my right!”
A smirk appeared on her face. “But I already know who you all want me to cosplay as, and a certain generous fellow has already shipped the parka my way. Once it arrives, patrons are in for a special, frosty treat!”
She then put her hands together. “In more somber news, Disney has shuttered its Infinity line, and withdrawn completely from publishing video games in house. With Activision’s Skylanders seeing a downward trend in sales in the toys-to-life niche over the last two years, Disney’s lack of confidence in its knockoff Infinity line drove them to make the decision to close things down. Disney is still committed to the video game industry, with Kingdom Hearts 3 set to release after Square Enix finally runs out of ways they can milk Kingdom Hearts 2.”
Misao then produced a cup of tea with a Lipton label hanging from the teabag string and took a sip as she looked to the side. Lowering it, she carries on. “China’s new console, Fuze’s Tomahawk P1, is a blatant ripoff of the PS4 and Xbox One. You’ll probably see it soon in the west, when a smarmy British commentator reviews it on a comfortable looking couch. And you’ll see it even sooner here in Japan, collecting dust just behind all the Xbox One on store shelves.”
Misao made finger motions, as if firing guns. “Hashtag Shots Fired! The staff here at BansheeDeadSix is probably not going to do a first look at the console, not because I insulted the company, China’s pride in ripping things off, or the fact that it’s literally a knockoff of two consoles I already reviewed–but because China has banned streams of girls eating bananas from their glorified intranet–and I need my potassium intake while gaming guys, you know this.”
From behind her back she produced a peeled banana and erotically plunged it into her mouth, taking it further than was safe, withdrew it slowly, pushed it in again, and–after giving a pouty look to the camera–bit through it.
“Don’t worry,” she said coyly, “I swallowed.”
She opens her mouth and sticks out her tongue as proof. “Finally, in a bit of good news, that a call to boycott against yours truly in defense of a certain vidya gaems writer, regarding the viral spread of certain comments on a stream about a certain party of women whom may or may not be related to said writer, evaporated as said party of women confirmed the veracity of statements made by yours truly.”
She grinned. “Filming for projects related to those statements is due to begin once schedules align… and divorce proceedings pan out. And that’s it for the Debrief. Like, comment, subscribe, always check your six and remember that the number one rule to combat is survive. BansheeDeadSix, over and out!”
Producing a remote, she shut off the camera and pumped her fist. “One take, flawless. Yes!”
She performed a pirouette where she stood, stopping when she saw on the kitchen wall-mounted digital face clock. It was 19:40, which meant that her roommate and houseguest were going to be here. “In three, two, one…”
The door opened, just as she predicted. In walked Katie first, a light spring in her step as Ranma brought up the rear. He was still not used to having a regular place to return to that wasn’t a tent in the park or hiding in a bush, it showed in his footsteps. Ready to bolt if he needed to, the mark of a wild animal feeling like it’s wandered into a cage.
Misao nodded, she was used to the skittish behavior. After all, Katie had been like that at first, aggressively stamping around while looking out for the moment someone was going to fall from the sky and try to kill her. She knew she had to work with what she was given, the coal to be pressed into a diamond.
Time to move.
“Hey you two!” She called, her voice bubbling along the walls. Katie’s pace immediately slowed down into something of a more measured gait, while Ranma’s relaxes into something more flat footed. Her voice has done its job in making sure that they won’t be assaulted. “Martial artists...” She rolled her eyes but it wasn’t in scorn or mockery.
“Hey, already done with the Debrief?” Katie took point, letting Ranma continue to bring himself down.
“Just finished!” Misao replied, slipping out to see the two of them still walking towards the studio. It was a slight bit later than she wanted, but they were going to put Ranma’s girl form on the internet and watch it explode in a wave of otaku tears and money. “One take is all I needed, bae!” She looked past Katie and shot Ranma a wink, just to see what would happen.
“Good job boss.” Ranma said, his tone even and respectful. It’s slight, but his face had faintly turned a shade of red. He was still adjusting to the sudden shift in his life where he traded in his Panda Dad for a bunch of hot girls. Not that he was about to complain, mind you, whoever made that deal got hosed something fierce.
Pleased with the reaction, Misao got down to brass tacks. “All right, go grab some cold water and a towel. We got enough time for me to give you a crash course on how to do this thing without too much issue. Once you got it, we’ll be doing a quickie first time stream to get your face out there to the general public.” She watched as his face soured and waited.
He didn’t defy her expectation. “I still don’t get why I gotta be a girl.” That was mostly a lie, he knew enough that a pretty girl could survive for days without cash and eat like a Queen. He was a guy, damn it.
Misao smirked, sidestepping the usual arguing in favor of shutting everything down. “Don’t worry, that’s part of the lecture.” Her smirk ditched the edge and softened down into a smile. “You’re going to places few boys ever will. That makes you pretty special in my eyes.”
The buttering worked, as Ranma’s neck suddenly felt hot at his employer’s words. “All right, I’ll go get the water.” He slumped away, shoulders hunched with embarrassment. It’ll be a while before he got used to a pretty girl telling him all the sweet things in the world.
Misao turned to Katie, eyes narrowed a little as she observed her roommate with a cool gaze. “All right,” she said in English, just in case. “What has you about to start breaking out into song today?”
Katie took a moment to consider her answer, before her face twisted into one of those infuriating smiles that make you wanna try and punch it off their face. She had a great day and is flaunting it at anyone dumb enough to ask. “Oh not much, me and Ranma had it out in a fight. I won just so you know.”
Misao snorted, as she could read between the lines enough to see the truth of the matter. Fighting alone would never ever have made her this chipper, the only other thing that had Katie walking on air like this was a successful hookup. “Must be her...”
That girl in the photo Katie had texted her a week or so ago. Not her Kouhai, but that girl’s oldest sister. Damn, she still couldn’t think about that girl without being consumed by lust. Couldn’t even be jealous, she’d be all up on Kasumi too if the opportunity knocked.
“So yeah, I’m golden tonight so you two have your NEET initiation or whatever.” Katie replied, all innocent like.
“You bitch.” Misao only thought it because Ranma returned before she could verbalize it.
“Got the water and the towel, now what?” He already knew what, he wanted to know where it was supposed to happen.
“Follow me to the couch,” Misao said, pushing whatever thoughts she had about Katie and what was going on with the girl from her mind. Time was now to get ready to put up another huge revenue stream, one that didn’t even realize the potential at its fingertips.
She turned back to the couch in front of her huge entertainment setup and led him to where he was going to make his stream debut. As a she but there wouldn’t be any smoke and mirrors. With real, legit actual magic on their side, she was going to turn this slab of beef into the tenderest lamb. All before dangling her before the wolves of the internet.
It was almost sick but you didn’t get anywhere in this world with a weak stomach and no convictions. They were right outside the chair he was going to sit in when they stopped. She turned to him, eyes full of authority. “Transform and dry off. Once you’re reasonably dry, you can sit down and I’ll begin our lesson for today.”
Transform, like he was some kind of Henshin hero, only with water and sex-changing instead of wind and bugs. So simple, yet so complex.
Ranma lifted the glass of cold water over his head before it’s turned upside down, upending its contents onto his head.
Misao’s eyes are glued to him, taking in every detail, to study and dissect later.
The change is never the same two times in a row, never has, never would as far as Ranma knew. This time, he felt the chill of the water shoot through his entire body before it hit. Ah, that tingle which signified his transition from him to her. Inches from his body are melted off in seconds, as he visibly shrinks before his audience. The shirt that was just the right size has swallowed the girl he has transformed into. At the same time, her breasts push and strain against the fabric, all at once too big and too small.
Ranma losing to an OC like this is a little weird to me, because I subscribe to the RPM school of thought that one of the major features of the manga is Ranma always wins. Sometimes its hte comeback fight, sure, but when it matters he wins.
This fight was just a spar. No real meaning behind it. If Ranma wins the next one, it won't matter, he'll still have lost the first one (the new win doesn't erase the old loss, like the way, say, the Herb fight did). It feels odd to me for him to lose here, BECAUSE nothing was on the line.
I dunno.
It may have been a bit gratuitous to move into an OC-makes-out-with-hottest-girl scene right after that, too.
Otherwise, good stuff.
This fight was just a spar. No real meaning behind it. If Ranma wins the next one, it won't matter, he'll still have lost the first one (the new win doesn't erase the old loss, like the way, say, the Herb fight did). It feels odd to me for him to lose here, BECAUSE nothing was on the line.
I dunno.
It may have been a bit gratuitous to move into an OC-makes-out-with-hottest-girl scene right after that, too.
Otherwise, good stuff.
RPM was the dude who wrote The More Things Change/The Pursuit of Happiness. The premise of the stories is that the bizarre harem comedy setup was less Ranma's fault, and more a fault of Nerima itself. If Ranma ever actually agreed to marry someone, the harem hijinks would swiftly begin anew with another guy cast as lead. In the story, Ryouga.
One of the major arcs in the story is a martial arts tournament. The finals is, of course, Ranma and Ryouga. It's really close, and the reader is probably rooting for Ryouga, but Ranma wins. In the author's notes, RPM makes note of how its still a Ranma story, and when it matters, Ranma always wins.
One of the major arcs in the story is a martial arts tournament. The finals is, of course, Ranma and Ryouga. It's really close, and the reader is probably rooting for Ryouga, but Ranma wins. In the author's notes, RPM makes note of how its still a Ranma story, and when it matters, Ranma always wins.
Ranma loses plenty in canon. In fact, when nothing significant is at stake, it is more likely that he will lose. The very first time he faces a major opponent, he is almost guaranteed to lose. What's different about this case is that Katie is a friendly. Ranma said it himself: "Did we just become best friends?" Don't get me wrong, I root for Ranma just as much as anybody else, but losing here is well within the "spirit" of the series. We'll see how he bounces back and grows from this...won't we Ero?
I don't have a problem with Ranma getting beaten if the opponent is that much better. However, in this case the only thing we really know about Katie's training is that she went on a training trip every summer vacation. Ranma on the other has probably been forced to trainf for hours every day of his life. So, unless Katie is the most talented fighter ever I don't see how she could match him that easily, except if she went through a more insane training regiment than Ranma did.
But then, fighting skills are pretty inconsistent in Ranma 1/2. Shampoo has an excellent sensei, but she's not even close to match Ranma. Ryoga is even more of a mystery. I can't really imagine how he got so strong with his bad direction sense. It's not like he could stay at a dojo for more than a day before getting lost.
What we need is more information about all the training Katie went through. Before I get that information I can't really say if Katie's win is legit or more of an author bias.
But then, fighting skills are pretty inconsistent in Ranma 1/2. Shampoo has an excellent sensei, but she's not even close to match Ranma. Ryoga is even more of a mystery. I can't really imagine how he got so strong with his bad direction sense. It's not like he could stay at a dojo for more than a day before getting lost.
What we need is more information about all the training Katie went through. Before I get that information I can't really say if Katie's win is legit or more of an author bias.
Next chapter.
= = =
Disclaimer: The following is a fan-written parody. Ranma ½ is property of Rumiko Takahashi, Studio Deen, Shogakukan, Viz Media, and Madman Entertainment. Support the official release, okay?
Senpai
A Ranma ½ Story
Chapter 6/?
As her bombastic entrance hinted at, when Kodachi Kuno’s ambitions were naked, she was a force to be reckoned with. From the moment the last student left the building the day of her arrival, Furinkan High School was transformed. Over a thousand contractors descended upon the school, remodeling it under the strict orders that the building be completely renovated by the next morning.
The old typical Japanese High School aesthetic quickly vanished under hammers, saws, and drills. And when the dust settled Furinkan High School was a full story taller and had a European Private School aesthetic that radiated high class and sophistication. Glass hallways designed by a mad Austrian, Italian decor, French Cuisine in the cafeteria, and uniforms by Hugo Boss. Were a lesser accountant to have a look at the price tag for the work done on Furinkan, their eyes would explode from their sockets and their skin would melt from their faces.
For Nabiki, it was an amusement, given the budget she was carelessly handed by Kodachi and expected to work wonders with. And oh, the wonders she would work.
She was sitting in what was now the Student Council office, a large and open room that had once been two third floor classrooms before the walls were knocked down and the floor finished with the finest wood. Out the window behind her, Akane was on the gymnastics field with Kodachi and Ranma, overseeing what was the beginning of physical education for the hopeless boys of Furinkan, and directly in front of her was the paperwork regarding school clubs that Kodachi wanted financed and rolled out.
“To think this school was a laughing stock a couple of weeks back,” Nabiki mused aloud. By the end of the year, this school was going to be the best on the planet, provided that Furinkan’s legendary run of bad luck didn’t shift back onto it.
Then again, things have been really quiet as of late, though to acknowledge it would mean that Nabiki would have to acknowledge-
“Oi, Nabiki,” Katie suddenly said, and Nabiki’s mood somewhat inverted, but didn’t make the nosedive into the ground.
She turned and looked up at the tall transfer, now wearing Furinkan’s new all black sailor fuku–albeit with an electric green tie at her insistence. “… Yes?” It wasn’t an annoyed tone but it buzzed close. Enough to rattle the tower at least.
Katie less than cared. She already had what she needed to make this whole thing go her way, so she’d let Nabiki play her games. “I got a little business to talk with you.”
Nabiki’s eyes widened a little, as if she hadn’t expected that Katie might ever need to do business with her. “You have my attention but only so much.” There was the club overhaul that needed to be ran through before it met the rubber stamp after all.
“It’s nothing that’ll waste too much time.” Katie replied to smooth things over. “How good are you at cards?”
“I get by. Which game are you beating around the bush about?” Nabiki replied with an annoyed tone. She had all this money she could be deciding how to dish out and bleh.
Katie feigned annoyance, letting the other girl feel in control. “Poker.”
Nabiki smirked a little at that. “Did you know poker was banned at Furinkan starting this year?”
“No.” Katie honestly had no clue about that.
“Some sore loser finally grew a set and squealed about the poker games we were having after school.” Nabiki said with a vicious grin. “Sad, but it didn’t pay quite as well as I had hoped anyways.”
“Wait, you ran illegal poker games at school and didn’t even get into trouble?” Katie seemed dubious about that.
“At the school that let the potential gang rape of my sister go unpunished until someone kicked the Principal’s son through the clock tower.” Nabiki reminded her.
“Oh.” So much had happened Katie forgot for a moment how this had all began.
“Yeah oh.” Nabiki snickered. “Anyways, there are few people you want to see with a deck of playing cards than me and they’re both in America.”
“I honestly can’t tell who she might be making a reference to.” Katie thought to herself. “That’s good, because I need to learn how to play, fast.”
“Need, now there’s a word.” Nabiki said, pursing her lips and considering it. “Let me guess, some wacky misadventure just so happened to dance into your life and now you need to play a high stakes poker game straight out of Kaiji.”
“More or less.” Katie figured mentioning her uncle wouldn’t help. Nabiki wasn’t sentimental like that. “So, you were the first person I thought of who could help me win.”
“You’re bad at poker?” Nabiki had figured Katie was one of those geniuses who just happened to be good at everything.
“I’ve never played.” Katie confessed.
“Oh you need to learn how to “play”.” Nabiki said, adding finger quotes around play for emphasis. “Well when you take out legitimacy, you’d probably like those other guys over me.”
“How much?” Katie asked, finally getting things where she needed them.
“No impassioned speech of friendship to try and convince me?” Nabiki was hoping to at least get a laugh out of this. How disappointing.
“I’m not good at those. I’m more about other things.” Katie admitted.
“Like what?” Nabiki asked.
“If we’re going fully my way, I’d seduce you and you’d help me after all the nice things I did to you.” Katie said with a straight face.
Nabiki narrowed her eyes at Katie and was trying to determine if her classmate was shitting her or not.
“… But my way isn’t for everyone and I’d rather still have time to train for this match.” Katie grinned a little, throwing Nabiki off that much more. “Your way is easy, pay money, get service.”
“That is true, do you have any idea who it is you’re facing off against?” Nabiki wanted to be sure it was worth it.
“One of the many assholes who fancies himself the King of Gambling. He apparently beat someone to whom I have personal ties to and I am being obliged to even the score.” Katie explained. “Sounds like he might have been after me from the get go, considering how much he seemed to know about me.”
Nabiki kept a straight face, using the poker face she had used to conquer her Freshman year at Furinkan. Inside though, she was remembering something really really bad. “I see.”
“So how much?” Katie asked again.
“Make an offer.” Nabiki replied, pushing down the feeling she wasn’t familiar with.
“I have mentioned I’m Misao Darlian’s bodyguard right?” Katie asked, waiting for Nabiki’s confirmation. “Well, we’re also good friends and long story short, I have permission to write a check on behalf of her family’s company.”
Nabiki’s mouth ran dry for a second before she cleared her throat to compose herself. “I see.”
“So again. How much?” Katie pressed, all without a single hint of physical intimidation.
“Nah, I’ll be fair to you and let you guess how much you think it’d take to buy me for this little venture of yours.” Nabiki didn’t want to get too greedy here, messing with someone like the Darlian family was an immensely bad idea. Right up there with walking through the Tomobiki neighborhood while announcing she wasn’t wearing panties.
Katie scribbled a number on a piece of paper and handed it over.
“I’m pretty sure this guy is after the bounty on her head. What a quandary, do I accept her money and sabotage her so I’m rid of her like I had planned, or do I accept the money and help her win?” Nabiki thought all of this in the time it took for Katie to scratch out the number. Opening the paper, she looked down at a sizable amount of zeroes. “Quandary averted!”
“So...?” Katie asked, sensing the shift in the other girl.
Nabiki appeared to be the perfect face of professionalism. “Tell me, do you know what a poker face is?”
“An expression that’s hard to read, right? So people can't tell what if you're bluffing or not.” Katie knew at least that much. “Kind of like yours right now.”
Nabiki ignored the attempt at flirting, instead focusing on the task at hand. “Well, we have a starting point at least.” She looked over at the stack of paperwork. “Let me get this done and we’ll begin.”
“So I take it you agree to the price?” Katie wanted to at least hear the affirmation.
“Yes, yes. Akane would mope for weeks if you got driven off, to say nothing of our glorious leader’s tantrum if her Disciplinary Officer had to skip town.” Nabiki said, rolling her eyes.
“To say nothing of the money.” Katie said, giving Nabiki a certain look of quasi-innocence.
“Oh please, if not for the cash you’d never get anywhere with me on this venture.” Nabiki organized the papers. “Now, sooner I get these ready, sooner you learn how to “play” poker.”
Katie laughed and took the dismissal for what it was. “For the record though, I really did hope you’d try things my way.” She bounced from the room before Nabiki could react.
Nabiki found it kinda hard to focus on the budget for a minute, having to fight off the odd blush that had taken root on her face. This was a little harder for her than she would like to admit, given that she was used to being to one to make other people uncomfortable. Regardless! This was a temporary setback. She'd have her revenge before long.
And if, in the process of waiting for that revenge, she got a few more cheques of comparable size? Well, Nabiki could certainly be motivated to be a little bit patient.
The sound of a student’s body then crashing into one of the room’s sturdy windows like a fly against a windshield made Nabiki jump, and she looked back to watch him, a kendoka slide slowly down the window and back towards the ground below with a soft squeaking sound.
Two weeks of self-loathing had not been kind to even the most athletic of the hentai horde. Not in a physical sense, thank heaven, but concepts such as self-worth and basic human dignity evaporated quickly in the hours after Akane collectively dumped all of them.
While Kodachi had lit a fire under their collective asses, it was barely a match in the wind. The road to reclaiming their masculinity lay in restoring that which men placed their pride in, first off, physical aptitude and prowess.
“As the new Captain of the Kendo club, there are going to be some changes,” Akane announced to the amassed young men. “The first and most important thing is that you'll be expected to all pull your weight. Not a single member will carry their clubs, especially in any of the martial arts clubs. It is because of that laziness that none of you could stand up to Kuno.”
Ranma folded his arms, unsure if such a demand could be honored by this menagerie. Kodachi, however, earnestly agreed.
“A bold first step, Tendo Akane!” She declared before addressing the boys directly. “Conquer your own weakness, and your self-loathing and despair shall follow with haste!”
Ranma looked over to Akane, who was dressed in full Kendo gear, and leaning upon the shinai she was about to beat most of these young men silly with. “So what exactly do you plan to do today?”
Akane glanced over. “Determining who’s the strongest of these students so that they can become club presidents.”
“How’re you going to find that out?” Ranma was genuinely curious.
Akane returned her attention to the front. “The same way anything is decided here in this neighborhood.”
She lifted up the Shinai and rested it on her shoulder. “We fight it out.”
Murmurs rumbled through the crowd. The specter of fighting Akane immediately reminded all of them of the one-sided slaughter that she repeatedly and enthusiastically committed against them on a daily basis. In the weeks since, the reasoning sank in that they had indeed made the wrong call in facing off between her and Kuno–their odds would’ve been so much better against the latter.
Kodachi sensed their trepidation, and elected to drive her heel into it. “Victory is not the goal in this skirmish! Your goal is merely to show what skill, talent, and strength you have. Those who perform exemplary will not only be elevated to officer position within their respective club, but their club will receive funding in accordance to that performance!”
She pointed the baton of her ribbon at the group. “This is success of the fittest, and I expect a good showing from all of you!”
That caught their attention, a club officer position? Extra club money? Fear quickly drained away, as goals actually worth fighting for gave that weak flame the fuel of ambition. It burned hotter, and the yammering became one of speculation and determination.
Ranma’s concern became curiosity, as Akane stepped towards the crowd of young men, the shinai still on her shoulder, while the crowd spread out in a wide half circle around her. He’d heard plenty of her prowess to this point, but now he wanted to see it for himself. Just how did a girl like her take on so many of these guys at once and win with such ease?
Akane looked back at Ranma, and flashed him a smile. “Watch carefully, Ranma!”
She looked ahead at her opponents, before calling out to them. “One at a time, or all at once, just don’t hesitate or you won’t give it your all.”
Kodachi then held up her ribbon, and slashed it through the air like a start flag. “BEGIN!”
There was, naturally, some hesitation at first. However, an industrious young boxer soon overcame his fear entirely, let out a kiai and charged straight for Akane. This immediately opened the floodgates, as soon every student was in a full-bodied charge straight for the Kendo Girl.
Akane lifted the shinai off her shoulder, and took it in both hands. As she neglected to wear her helmet, the charging boys could see the determined smile spread across her lips and the fire of competition burn in her own eyes. Then she was moving forward, kicking off the ground and charging that same boxer who initiated the charge.
“Here I come, Akane-!” His powerful left hook came right for Akane’s jaw, as she adjusted the aim of her shinai. At the last second, his punch whiffed her face, as the shinai connected sidelong into his left side, and he was swept away as if captured by the flow of a flash flood.
The boxer went on and a half dozen bodies were soon propelled up and out of the charging crowd like a bomb had gone off. Several more boys were launched as well, this time by Akane directly as her uppercut with the shinai cleared a wedge of them closing in on her from the front.
Ranma perked up at the sheer physicality of Akane’s attacks, watching her as she turned around and crossed bamboo with another kendoka, the sheer strength of her strike causing him to hit himself with his own shinai and knock him back. Two karate club members leaped over the falling kendoka, and twisted themselves out of the way when she turned and swung up at them.
One landed behind her, and charged her back. Taking the shinai, she aimed it over her shoulder and pegged him square in the forehead in it, before slamming it down upon the second club member as he tried to attack her while she was distracted.
Stepping over the flattened boy, she ducked and weaved over more strikes from another kendoka, and parried a few more quick, strikes she couldn’t dodge. This was effective in allowing other boys to surround and move in, weakening Akane’s defensive options.
“Oh, he’s good,” Kodachi said of the kendoka.
Finally taking one hand off the Shinai, she reached up and caught her opponent’s bamboo blade, stopping him long enough to drive the tip of hers into his stomach and fling him into another group of boys.
Flipping the shinai over, she caught it by the handle and assumed a two sword stance, causing Ranma’s eyebrows to raise.
“Is she really going to…?” He asked before she went and did it.
Whirling around, she used both shinai with great effect, knocking down and aside those earnestly foolish enough to attempt to get at her back, while using both bamboo blades to keep a circle open where only the bodies of the defeated lay. Her gaze swept left and right, the smile on her face becoming familiar to Ranma as she waited for the next comer.
She didn’t have to wait long, as three sumo wrestlers came right at her, faces aggressively painted arms outstretched to swamp her before she could do any harm.
It was for naught. With one shinai, she tagged one of the sumo in the ankle, causing him to stagger, before spinning and sweeping him off his feet with both. As he cartwheeled in place, she drove both bamboo swords into his stomach, and he went spinning backward through the other boys. Sweeping the shinai to her sides, she clocked the other two sumo upside their heads, knocking them both out and leaving them crashing to the ground behind her.
And now Ranma was impressed. Not just at the magical things Akane could do with a couple of tightly bound together bamboo sticks, but the sheer, overwhelming joy that Akane was wearing on her face as she did it. It wasn’t like the bloodthirsty smile that he saw with Katie… though it resembled it on the surface. No, Akane was smiling like she this was the first fight she’d ever gotten to enjoy.
“Come on!” Akane called out as she deflected and blocked one fortuitous student’s attempt at striking her with a field hockey stick. “Give me everything!”
She turned away from him as she knocked him off his footing, using the time he spent recovering to similarly duel two more kendoka, knocking one out while capturing the shinai of the other and directing him around her to thrust his shinai into the field hockey player’s chest. She then conked the deflected kendoka atop his head, dropping him straight down.
“Don’t hold back!” She shouted right before another boxer got inside the reach of her bamboo blades and began lightning fast flicker jabs for her head. Bobbing her head, she kept just out of the boxer’s reach, as she hopped back with his footsteps forward. When she brought both shinai up to block his strikes, he simply bashed them both aside with a headbutt and then followed with an uppercut, that Akane avoided by flipping up and away, throwing the shinai in her off hand down at his face and laying him out flat.
Kodachi nodded in approval. “There goes our boxing club captain.”
Taking the shinai in both hands, Akane fell towards a judo club member, who simply held tightly to the belt of his gi, fire burning in his eyes as he braced himself for her attack. When it came, he didn’t move, he didn’t block, he simply yelled his kiai and met the shinai with his forehead.
The shinai didn’t break, but Akane’s momentum went to zero, and the ground buckled beneath the judo student, who screamed again and then lashed out to grab her.
Ranma tensed in excitement when he saw that. Now that was what he wanted to see!
When the judoka’s hand clamped onto her shoulder, Akane twisted out of it, and swung the shinai around, only to have it strong armed by his other hand as he thrust the first to palm her back. Akane swung herself around the other way, catching the judoka behind his knees and forcing them to them. And then back around again she came, striking the burly young man across the chest and dropping him on his back.
Even on a warm pleasant day like this, Akane was running so hot that puffs of condensation were clearly visible with her breath, as she turned and charged towards the remaining horde, who were only growing bolder and more decisive with every show of courage from the the likes of those who could last more than a few seconds against her. With the drive to meet her approval replacing their fear of Tatewaki Kuno, they were beginning to see the potential that Kodachi could see in them!
While Ranma could see that potential himself, that was none of his concern at the moment. All he could see was the beautifully grinning Akane as she lost herself in the thrill of combat. It was so distinct from Katie now. The held back impulse to destroy wasn’t there, instead there was amazement at her own strength, the excitement of avoiding a strike, and the joy of connecting a blow and defeating an opponent who earned it.
He could’ve sworn that she’d never experienced something like this, the fun of a real slap down, drag out brawl. If this were a battlefield, like in the old days, she’d be right up there with himself and Katie, a force of nature that swept through everything in her path!
And… Ranma found that he liked that a lot.
“GAHHHHH!” One of the last remaining attackers, some weird kid on a pogo stick, screamed as he was brought down and left unconscious. This left only Akane and one other kendoka, who was armed with a bokken rather than a shinai.
Akane had been keeping an eye on him, he was one of the smarter ones, lurking around the back of the crowd, watching the fight with vested interest. Akane found him interesting, but there was a problem with his pose and intention–there was a complete lack of excitement in it. Both Kodachi and Ranma noticed it as well.
“This guy’s not from our school,” Ranma realized.
Kodachi nodded. “An excellent observation, he must’ve slipped into the crowd during the gathering of students.” She narrowed her eyes. “A spy from Kolkhoz High School perhaps? Oh Saginomiya, how dare you be so petty…”
“Saginomiya?” Ranma asked.
“Ohohoho, never you mind… that is merely the name of gnat who will soon be crushed,” Kodachi replied.
“If he ain’t from around here, he might be trouble,” Ranma said.
Kodachi disagreed. “I doubt he will be anything more than a footnote in her story of greatness.”
The kendoka tightened his grip, and Akane immediately recognized it. It was nothing like the style of kendo that Tatewaki Kuno drilled into his former subordinates. There was also something ominous about it, clear and real intent to do harm to her.
She just smiled, it was nothing compared to what she felt from her senpai. “Whoever you are, you’re about to make a mistake.”
The masked kendoka just let out a short chuckle, and came right at her, bokken low and body moving fast. His thrust missed as Akane flowed around it, guiding his wooden blade away with her bamboo. What felt like slow-motion suddenly became fast-forward as he recovered from the deflect with all the skill of a professional champion and came at Akane with slashes so fast that the air cracked. Massive, over the head blows mixed with figure-eight patterned swings that were definitely not Kuno’s barrage of forward thrusts.
They were fast, very fast. Strikes glanced off Akane’s armor that she couldn’t deflect with her sword. They came agonizingly close, almost trapping her if not for the slightest twitch, dip, or shift in Akane’s stance. It was here, as this mysterious opponent came with every intent to strike her down rather than survive, that Akane’s smile did take that characteristic of Katie’s… bloodlust seeping in as she recognized this opponent as only an enemy.
Ranma saw it, and he tensed up again. This wasn’t going to end well.
Kodachi, however, was on the verge of drooling as she anticipated the outcome of the duel.
She would not be disappointed, as the kendoka suddenly caught Akane’s shinai as she attempted to parry a strike–then swung the shinai around and around in a circle before knocking the weapon up and out of her hands, straight up. As the shinai flipped upward, and Akane’s gaze was drawn up after it, she realized that she was open right as the kendoka lunged forward, to bring the bokken down on the top of her head.
“Know your place, Furinkan dog!” The swordsman shouted as the blade came down on her head… and hit nothing. “Huh?!”
That’s because the bokken had been snatched from his hands when Akane caught it flat between hers and gently wrenched it free. Twirling the bokken around in her hands, she caught it by its hilt, as her opponent slowly turned towards her, his eyes growing large.
It was at this moment that he knew: he fucked up.
Akane’s newly claimed bokken slammed into his crotch, shattering the skirt armor of his kendo uniform and the cup he wore to protect his berries. The impact came with such force that the bokken shattered as well, as he was lifted off the ground a good meter and a half. Casting the destroyed wooden sword over her shoulder, she kept her hand above her head and caught her shinai by the handle, before taking it in both hands and rearing back to aim a thrust straight for the kendoka’s sternum.
“My place is standing over you… with my heel grinding your head!” She yelled before she fired off the thrust, the tip of the shinai striking her target dead on and accelerating him, not unlike Kuno and Genma as done by Katie, into a terminal flight straight into one of the corner windows of the top floor of the school, where he struck with a loud bang.
Thanks to the building’s renovation and reinforcement, however, all the foolish kendoka left was a smear of blood and drool as he slid down the side of the now mostly glass building to the ground three stories below.
Panting, Akane lowered her shinai and looked around the unconscious or stirring young men she pummeled into the dirt. She then looked over to Kodachi and Ranma, her smile regaining all of its beautiful properties while losing all of the darker aspects. “So, how was that?!”
Kodachi began to applaud, certainly impressed. “That was magnificent, Tendo Akane.”
“Yeah, you were pretty good out there,” Ranma admitted.
Kodachi then gave Ranma a teasing look. “Certainly fine marriage material, wouldn’t you agree, Mr. Fiancé?”
Ranma began to blush somewhat, as he was put on the spot. “I’m not saying she’s not.”
Not at all, in fact… seeing this side of Akane just made the prospect and conflict of marrying one of the Tendo girls all the more difficult. One by one, they were all really starting to show how amazing they were. But admitting it outright brought on so much baggage that he was almost afraid to. Bad enough that he would have to acknowledge his father for bringing him here, but then he would actually have to choose one.
Kodachi whistled, and a number of her handsome gentlemen were at her side in a flash. She then gestured to the beaten young men. “Take them to the infirmary. Our new nursing staff shall administer onto them the finest of care. Do not look down upon them, for they have taken the first step to become fine young men like yourselves.”
“Yes, Kodachi-sama!” The gentlemen chorused before getting to work.
Akane walked over, still a bit huffy. “I’ll have the list of club presidents in a moment, Kodachi-san.”
“Yes, keep that fresh in your head. For now, we must deal with the intruder upon our garden,” Kodachi said as she and Ranma turned towards the unconscious kendoist.
Akane stepped up as well, and nodded. “Yeah, let’s go get Katie-senpai, some discipline is in order.”
“What did I tell you, Saotome?” Soun said to his former rival and now best friend as the two of them sat in a bar that was mostly empty due to the early hour of the day. “Tofu-dono does exceptional work.”
Genma was still smarting from being launched by Katie the day before, but as Soun boasted the Tendo family’s physician was surprisingly capable at treating the sort of injuries that came with being launched into the lower atmosphere. “I’m surprised but happy about the quality of work provided.” He could have done without the excessive pain the treatment entailed. “Since I was gone for the time being, how did the boy’s visit go?”
Soun chuckled to hide his nerves. “It went pretty well. I have a feeling the boy is smitten by all three of my daughters in some fashion.”
That came as something of a relief to Genma, long as those three held his interest he didn’t have to worry as much about the likes of those two young women he’d spent the last two nights with. “Finally, something starts going my way.”
Soun, as if compelled by the universe to dash that hope, had to mention something to put the worry back in the elder Saotome. “Just the same, he apparently has taken up residence with those two girls.”
Genma’s eyes widened, as in the background someone entered the bar. “You couldn’t get him to stay the night?!”
“I tried but he was too headstrong for me… and my daughters leapt to his defense.” Soun said in defense of himself. He wasn’t going to mention being scared shitless by Katie though.
Genma appeared mollified by this. “Oh, well at least they’re interested in scoring brownie points with the boy.” He had apparently tired of this point, and moved on the most pressing issue. “I can’t believe I’ve been waylaid by the same girl twice.”
Soun nodded in sympathy. “She is a budding master of Indiscriminate Grappling, even without training in our schools.” That reminded him, there was the thing he didn’t want Genma to know. “Saotome, your son and that girl had a spar last night.”
Genma shrugged it off. “So the boy already avenged me eh?” He laughed for a couple seconds before he realized Soun wasn’t laughing. “Didn’t he?”
Soun shook his head sadly. “It was a close contest, but she won. He was magnificent though and had she been a little more traditional, he would have defeated her soundly.”
The boy lost?! Well that was three times that this girl has humiliated him. “Tendo, we have to do something about that girl.”
While Soun would readily agree that there was something wrong with the young lady Izland, and felt that her association with not only Ranma but the rest of his family didn’t have a positive outlook going, he had his reservations about confronting the girl about it. “What do you reckon by ‘do something about her’?”
“I mean as long as she’s going to be around, she’s going to be an extremely bad influence on my boy, and upon your girls too!” He shot back, inadvertently reminding Soun of why they were friends–they more often than not thought alike. “It’s one thing to convince him to throw away his manhood by embracing his curse, but it’s another thing entirely to beat him!”
He pounded his fist on the bar top. “I trained my son to never lose–except to me, but even that’s happening less nowadays–do you have any idea what it means to have some girl, out of nowhere mind you, show up and defeat him?!”
“She’s skilled, Saotome,” Soun lamented. “Whoever trained her, trained her as well as you trained your son.”
Though there was certainly a darker intent behind the training. Ranma was trained to master the art, certainly, but Katie was trained to use it.
Genma, however, could not let go of his lost pride. “That doesn’t matter, my son is the best! He’s not supposed to lose, especially not to some shifty-eyed, nosy, meddling girl too tall for her own damn good!”
The curtains draped halfway over the otherwise fully opened front doors of the bar shifted and then were pushed aside, as a figure stepped in. A foreigner wearing steel toe boots, khaki pants, and a matching vest over a gray shirt. He also wore a well-worn dark brown fedora, the right side of the wide brim pinned up against the side of the hat with what appeared to be a senbon needle.
He loped over to the counter, where the older, stern-looking bartender watched him with narrowed eyes. Without preamble, he reached the stool at Soun’s left and dropped himself down on it, before calling to the bartender and slipping a few yen please. “Biggest mug you’ve got, Sapporo.”
The bartender nodded his head, and soon enough a tall, frosted mug of beer was set in front of the foreigner, who lifted it up and took a long, slow sip. “Afternoon, gentlemen.”
Genma immediately pretended that he wasn’t spoken to by the foreigner, as Soun was closer to him. Left on the spot, Soun grew a bit tense, before he brought a closed fist to his lips and cleared his throat.
“Hello, can my companion or I help you?” He asked.
“No, but I think I can help you,” the foreigner replied in a polite, gentlemanly fashion. “I was walking by outside this nice establishment, when I heard some fairly unkind words about a young woman. As a man whom many people seek to solve their problems for them, I thought I’d come on over and offer you a bit of assistance on this one of yours.”
Soun gave Genma a look, his little outburst had been heard all the way outside? How embarrassing. “Pardon my friend, he is just frustrated over… well… a young woman that has been getting into scraps with him.”
“A woman, huh?” The foreigner looked past Soun, at Genma. “An ex-lover? Baby-mama drama?”
“Don’t be absurd, I’m a married man with a wife who loves me!” Genma snapped back. “This problematic woman is a high school girl who doesn’t know to mind her own business!”
“People not staying in their own lane? I, ironically, can empathize with your plight.” The foreigner replied. “Tell me more about it?”
Genma scowled, and took a sip from his small dish of sake. He could never turn down someone willing to pay him some sympathy. “The girl’s a damn savage, beating up on both my son and I, completely unprovoked. Kicked me in the head twice, like she wanted to kill me!”
The foreign man whistled in sympathy. “That’s pretty rough for ya man. Sounds like she was trained by a right cool son of a bitch, though.”
Soun took exception to that. “Cool? There’s nothing ‘cool’ in training a girl that young to kill!”
“Hey now, man, the world’s a dangerous place. Rapists an’ Monsters an’ aliens an’ shit running around. A girl ought to know how to kill so she can walk to school with some peace of mind.”
Genma dismissed that outright. “What would a killer know about peace of mind?”
The foreigner snorted. “What kinda killer leaves someone they’re trying to kill alive?”
Soun paused to consider that, having lost whatever sanctimonious thing he was going to say because of the sudden burst of logic.
Genma wasn’t having any of that think before you speak shit though. “Just because I am so very durable doesn’t mean anyone else should be so lucky!”
“A fair point,” the other man conceded, before circumventing that point entirely like some kind of living snakeman. “But if this girl was just a mindless killer, wouldn’t it make more sense that she’d incapacitate ya before killing ya? No matter how tough yer body is, your brain gets shook and ya go down.”
Genma faltered, unable to come up with a suitable argument at the moment.
Soun wanted to pick up the fight but found himself trying to get around the logic and unable to do so.
“Now if you’ll allow me one final point, knowledge of how to kill ain’t the same as the will to kill.” The foreigner seemed to rest his case at that.
Genma, unable to fight the argument, went to fight the guy. “You seem to know a lot about this girl despite your alleged impartiality.”
The foreigner hummed. “Well, she certainly reminds me of a girl that I dropped off here some time back to do some work for a friend of a friend. I suppose that’s why I feel so compelled to defend her honor from a salty bastard crying about how she beat him and his boy.”
Genma resisted the urge to growl, but his voice did raise. “Just who are you anyways?”
“Nicholas Fontaine Sherman,” the man introduced himself, “My niece is a shifty-eyed, nosy, too tall for her own good type o’ gal named Katie Izland.” His tone then dropped from easy-going and polite, to menacingly calm. “I hope that name doesn’t ring a bell to you gentlemen.”
Soun and Genma reacted exactly how two cowards who were used to bullying the weak around to get what they want ran into someone potentially stronger than them: complete and utter panic. Soun gibbered a little while Genma sucked on his teeth as if to stifle a scream. All in all, it wasn’t quite as bad a display it could have been.
“Well now,” Nick drawled, “looks like you two do know something. Good to know my ‘awareness’ hasn’t led me wrong.”
He turned on the stool, and took another sip of his beer. “So, tell me a little bit more details, guys. What exactly has my niece been up to since I left her here? I have expectations, y’see.”
Self-preservation immediately kicked in for Genma, who immediately scanned the room for anything he might find to put in between him and this awkward situation and escape. So far, it was looking like he’d have to bail on Soun–which was for the best, since he was paying for this round of drinks to begin with.
That wasn’t to say that Soun wasn’t looking for an easy way out, though. “Well, ahem, your daughter is skilled as a martial artist. My friend here, his son enjoyed fighting her, in spite of the outcome. She also gets along well with my daughters.”
Well, with Akane of course, Kasumi seemed taken enough with her, and she wasn’t Nabiki’s enemy at least.
“No shit?” Nick’s tone ticked right back up to pleasant. “Well, if things are all hunky-dory then I’m glad. She’s had trouble makin’ friends, you see? Her last pals turned out to be pretty savage backstabbers, or straight up crazy–I’ve still got one out there who wants to break her spine like a dry twig.”
He slapped his hand on the top of the bar again, revealing a bit more yen. “What do you say I buy your next few drinks there? Just you, though.” He then indicated Genma. “Your buddy there can sit and spin.”
Soun, ever the balanced individual (and sensing that Genma was seconds away from abandoning him to this wolf), quite eagerly accepted the offer. “Well, I can’t possibly say no to that sort of generosity. I’m Tendo Soun.”
Nick was all smiles. “Good to meet ya, Tendo-san. And who’s your friend eyeing the door over there? You know, the dipshit?”
“Saotome Genma,” Soun replied, and an arrow of betrayal went right into Genma’s back.
Nick then, unexpectedly, underwent a dramatic transformation–going from maliciously amused to outright wide-eyed with surprise. “D-did you say Saotome Genma?”
Genma froze, right as he was about to leap off the stool and dash straight out of the door. Soun was taken off guard by Nick’s sudden recognition as well.
Nick looked directly at him. “Saotome Genma, of the Saotome School of Indiscriminate Grappling? The Saotome Genma, husband of Saotome Nodoka, and father of Saotome Ranma?”
Well, if Genma’s blood had been cold before in the face of a stronger opponent, it was now an icy slush that threatened to stop his heart. He turned back to face Nick, ready to go on the defensive in case this strange man had some sort of grudge against him for something else. How did he know so much about him? Even the name of his wife?!
“I am that Saotome Genma…” He said, gruffly despite his trepidation.
“Huh,” Nick said, “Small world. Hey, forgive my previous rudeness… I didn’t realize I was in the presence of a legend.”
And now Genma was confused. “E-excuse me?”
“You’ve got a reputation that precedes you, especially in my community,” Nick gestured to the bar. “Help yourself to the top shelf at my expense, my friend. You’ve earned it.” To Soun he nodded. “You too, Tendo-san. I didn’t think we’d all be so closely interconnected like this. Our kids all meetin’ and becoming friends.”
And now Genma was not confused. “Oh, well that is generous of you.”
Soun would’ve found Nick’s sudden flip-flopping odd, but the promise of top shelf alcohol and a lack of animosity from the foreigner dashed those concerns.
“Well, in my lifetime I’ve learned that it’s good to clear the air of any misunderstandings, especially for the benefit of the kids, you know? And while Katie may be my niece, but I’ve raised her like a daughter for thirteen summers and at least two winters.”
She certainly had some martial artists’ chops if most of that raising involved the sort of training that made her into a beast that rivaled Ranma, Soun reasoned. “You’ve taken good care of her.”
Nick nodded again. “You betcha. I still look out for her; hence my sticking my nose in here… and well… why I decided to come here from two neighborhoods over in the first place. On that note, I have a question:”
He looked between Soun and Genma, as he asked this question. “You wouldn’t happen to know anyone petty enough to put an 700,000 yen bounty on my niece’s head for her ‘complete and utter humiliation’, would you?”
And just like that, Soun knew.
= = =
Disclaimer: The following is a fan-written parody. Ranma ½ is property of Rumiko Takahashi, Studio Deen, Shogakukan, Viz Media, and Madman Entertainment. Support the official release, okay?
Senpai
A Ranma ½ Story
Chapter 6/?
|Poker Face|
As her bombastic entrance hinted at, when Kodachi Kuno’s ambitions were naked, she was a force to be reckoned with. From the moment the last student left the building the day of her arrival, Furinkan High School was transformed. Over a thousand contractors descended upon the school, remodeling it under the strict orders that the building be completely renovated by the next morning.
The old typical Japanese High School aesthetic quickly vanished under hammers, saws, and drills. And when the dust settled Furinkan High School was a full story taller and had a European Private School aesthetic that radiated high class and sophistication. Glass hallways designed by a mad Austrian, Italian decor, French Cuisine in the cafeteria, and uniforms by Hugo Boss. Were a lesser accountant to have a look at the price tag for the work done on Furinkan, their eyes would explode from their sockets and their skin would melt from their faces.
For Nabiki, it was an amusement, given the budget she was carelessly handed by Kodachi and expected to work wonders with. And oh, the wonders she would work.
She was sitting in what was now the Student Council office, a large and open room that had once been two third floor classrooms before the walls were knocked down and the floor finished with the finest wood. Out the window behind her, Akane was on the gymnastics field with Kodachi and Ranma, overseeing what was the beginning of physical education for the hopeless boys of Furinkan, and directly in front of her was the paperwork regarding school clubs that Kodachi wanted financed and rolled out.
“To think this school was a laughing stock a couple of weeks back,” Nabiki mused aloud. By the end of the year, this school was going to be the best on the planet, provided that Furinkan’s legendary run of bad luck didn’t shift back onto it.
Then again, things have been really quiet as of late, though to acknowledge it would mean that Nabiki would have to acknowledge-
“Oi, Nabiki,” Katie suddenly said, and Nabiki’s mood somewhat inverted, but didn’t make the nosedive into the ground.
She turned and looked up at the tall transfer, now wearing Furinkan’s new all black sailor fuku–albeit with an electric green tie at her insistence. “… Yes?” It wasn’t an annoyed tone but it buzzed close. Enough to rattle the tower at least.
Katie less than cared. She already had what she needed to make this whole thing go her way, so she’d let Nabiki play her games. “I got a little business to talk with you.”
Nabiki’s eyes widened a little, as if she hadn’t expected that Katie might ever need to do business with her. “You have my attention but only so much.” There was the club overhaul that needed to be ran through before it met the rubber stamp after all.
“It’s nothing that’ll waste too much time.” Katie replied to smooth things over. “How good are you at cards?”
“I get by. Which game are you beating around the bush about?” Nabiki replied with an annoyed tone. She had all this money she could be deciding how to dish out and bleh.
Katie feigned annoyance, letting the other girl feel in control. “Poker.”
Nabiki smirked a little at that. “Did you know poker was banned at Furinkan starting this year?”
“No.” Katie honestly had no clue about that.
“Some sore loser finally grew a set and squealed about the poker games we were having after school.” Nabiki said with a vicious grin. “Sad, but it didn’t pay quite as well as I had hoped anyways.”
“Wait, you ran illegal poker games at school and didn’t even get into trouble?” Katie seemed dubious about that.
“At the school that let the potential gang rape of my sister go unpunished until someone kicked the Principal’s son through the clock tower.” Nabiki reminded her.
“Oh.” So much had happened Katie forgot for a moment how this had all began.
“Yeah oh.” Nabiki snickered. “Anyways, there are few people you want to see with a deck of playing cards than me and they’re both in America.”
“I honestly can’t tell who she might be making a reference to.” Katie thought to herself. “That’s good, because I need to learn how to play, fast.”
“Need, now there’s a word.” Nabiki said, pursing her lips and considering it. “Let me guess, some wacky misadventure just so happened to dance into your life and now you need to play a high stakes poker game straight out of Kaiji.”
“More or less.” Katie figured mentioning her uncle wouldn’t help. Nabiki wasn’t sentimental like that. “So, you were the first person I thought of who could help me win.”
“You’re bad at poker?” Nabiki had figured Katie was one of those geniuses who just happened to be good at everything.
“I’ve never played.” Katie confessed.
“Oh you need to learn how to “play”.” Nabiki said, adding finger quotes around play for emphasis. “Well when you take out legitimacy, you’d probably like those other guys over me.”
“How much?” Katie asked, finally getting things where she needed them.
“No impassioned speech of friendship to try and convince me?” Nabiki was hoping to at least get a laugh out of this. How disappointing.
“I’m not good at those. I’m more about other things.” Katie admitted.
“Like what?” Nabiki asked.
“If we’re going fully my way, I’d seduce you and you’d help me after all the nice things I did to you.” Katie said with a straight face.
Nabiki narrowed her eyes at Katie and was trying to determine if her classmate was shitting her or not.
“… But my way isn’t for everyone and I’d rather still have time to train for this match.” Katie grinned a little, throwing Nabiki off that much more. “Your way is easy, pay money, get service.”
“That is true, do you have any idea who it is you’re facing off against?” Nabiki wanted to be sure it was worth it.
“One of the many assholes who fancies himself the King of Gambling. He apparently beat someone to whom I have personal ties to and I am being obliged to even the score.” Katie explained. “Sounds like he might have been after me from the get go, considering how much he seemed to know about me.”
Nabiki kept a straight face, using the poker face she had used to conquer her Freshman year at Furinkan. Inside though, she was remembering something really really bad. “I see.”
“So how much?” Katie asked again.
“Make an offer.” Nabiki replied, pushing down the feeling she wasn’t familiar with.
“I have mentioned I’m Misao Darlian’s bodyguard right?” Katie asked, waiting for Nabiki’s confirmation. “Well, we’re also good friends and long story short, I have permission to write a check on behalf of her family’s company.”
Nabiki’s mouth ran dry for a second before she cleared her throat to compose herself. “I see.”
“So again. How much?” Katie pressed, all without a single hint of physical intimidation.
“Nah, I’ll be fair to you and let you guess how much you think it’d take to buy me for this little venture of yours.” Nabiki didn’t want to get too greedy here, messing with someone like the Darlian family was an immensely bad idea. Right up there with walking through the Tomobiki neighborhood while announcing she wasn’t wearing panties.
Katie scribbled a number on a piece of paper and handed it over.
“I’m pretty sure this guy is after the bounty on her head. What a quandary, do I accept her money and sabotage her so I’m rid of her like I had planned, or do I accept the money and help her win?” Nabiki thought all of this in the time it took for Katie to scratch out the number. Opening the paper, she looked down at a sizable amount of zeroes. “Quandary averted!”
“So...?” Katie asked, sensing the shift in the other girl.
Nabiki appeared to be the perfect face of professionalism. “Tell me, do you know what a poker face is?”
“An expression that’s hard to read, right? So people can't tell what if you're bluffing or not.” Katie knew at least that much. “Kind of like yours right now.”
Nabiki ignored the attempt at flirting, instead focusing on the task at hand. “Well, we have a starting point at least.” She looked over at the stack of paperwork. “Let me get this done and we’ll begin.”
“So I take it you agree to the price?” Katie wanted to at least hear the affirmation.
“Yes, yes. Akane would mope for weeks if you got driven off, to say nothing of our glorious leader’s tantrum if her Disciplinary Officer had to skip town.” Nabiki said, rolling her eyes.
“To say nothing of the money.” Katie said, giving Nabiki a certain look of quasi-innocence.
“Oh please, if not for the cash you’d never get anywhere with me on this venture.” Nabiki organized the papers. “Now, sooner I get these ready, sooner you learn how to “play” poker.”
Katie laughed and took the dismissal for what it was. “For the record though, I really did hope you’d try things my way.” She bounced from the room before Nabiki could react.
Nabiki found it kinda hard to focus on the budget for a minute, having to fight off the odd blush that had taken root on her face. This was a little harder for her than she would like to admit, given that she was used to being to one to make other people uncomfortable. Regardless! This was a temporary setback. She'd have her revenge before long.
And if, in the process of waiting for that revenge, she got a few more cheques of comparable size? Well, Nabiki could certainly be motivated to be a little bit patient.
The sound of a student’s body then crashing into one of the room’s sturdy windows like a fly against a windshield made Nabiki jump, and she looked back to watch him, a kendoka slide slowly down the window and back towards the ground below with a soft squeaking sound.
|Warchild|
Two weeks of self-loathing had not been kind to even the most athletic of the hentai horde. Not in a physical sense, thank heaven, but concepts such as self-worth and basic human dignity evaporated quickly in the hours after Akane collectively dumped all of them.
While Kodachi had lit a fire under their collective asses, it was barely a match in the wind. The road to reclaiming their masculinity lay in restoring that which men placed their pride in, first off, physical aptitude and prowess.
“As the new Captain of the Kendo club, there are going to be some changes,” Akane announced to the amassed young men. “The first and most important thing is that you'll be expected to all pull your weight. Not a single member will carry their clubs, especially in any of the martial arts clubs. It is because of that laziness that none of you could stand up to Kuno.”
Ranma folded his arms, unsure if such a demand could be honored by this menagerie. Kodachi, however, earnestly agreed.
“A bold first step, Tendo Akane!” She declared before addressing the boys directly. “Conquer your own weakness, and your self-loathing and despair shall follow with haste!”
Ranma looked over to Akane, who was dressed in full Kendo gear, and leaning upon the shinai she was about to beat most of these young men silly with. “So what exactly do you plan to do today?”
Akane glanced over. “Determining who’s the strongest of these students so that they can become club presidents.”
“How’re you going to find that out?” Ranma was genuinely curious.
Akane returned her attention to the front. “The same way anything is decided here in this neighborhood.”
She lifted up the Shinai and rested it on her shoulder. “We fight it out.”
Murmurs rumbled through the crowd. The specter of fighting Akane immediately reminded all of them of the one-sided slaughter that she repeatedly and enthusiastically committed against them on a daily basis. In the weeks since, the reasoning sank in that they had indeed made the wrong call in facing off between her and Kuno–their odds would’ve been so much better against the latter.
Kodachi sensed their trepidation, and elected to drive her heel into it. “Victory is not the goal in this skirmish! Your goal is merely to show what skill, talent, and strength you have. Those who perform exemplary will not only be elevated to officer position within their respective club, but their club will receive funding in accordance to that performance!”
She pointed the baton of her ribbon at the group. “This is success of the fittest, and I expect a good showing from all of you!”
That caught their attention, a club officer position? Extra club money? Fear quickly drained away, as goals actually worth fighting for gave that weak flame the fuel of ambition. It burned hotter, and the yammering became one of speculation and determination.
Ranma’s concern became curiosity, as Akane stepped towards the crowd of young men, the shinai still on her shoulder, while the crowd spread out in a wide half circle around her. He’d heard plenty of her prowess to this point, but now he wanted to see it for himself. Just how did a girl like her take on so many of these guys at once and win with such ease?
Akane looked back at Ranma, and flashed him a smile. “Watch carefully, Ranma!”
She looked ahead at her opponents, before calling out to them. “One at a time, or all at once, just don’t hesitate or you won’t give it your all.”
Kodachi then held up her ribbon, and slashed it through the air like a start flag. “BEGIN!”
There was, naturally, some hesitation at first. However, an industrious young boxer soon overcame his fear entirely, let out a kiai and charged straight for Akane. This immediately opened the floodgates, as soon every student was in a full-bodied charge straight for the Kendo Girl.
Akane lifted the shinai off her shoulder, and took it in both hands. As she neglected to wear her helmet, the charging boys could see the determined smile spread across her lips and the fire of competition burn in her own eyes. Then she was moving forward, kicking off the ground and charging that same boxer who initiated the charge.
“Here I come, Akane-!” His powerful left hook came right for Akane’s jaw, as she adjusted the aim of her shinai. At the last second, his punch whiffed her face, as the shinai connected sidelong into his left side, and he was swept away as if captured by the flow of a flash flood.
The boxer went on and a half dozen bodies were soon propelled up and out of the charging crowd like a bomb had gone off. Several more boys were launched as well, this time by Akane directly as her uppercut with the shinai cleared a wedge of them closing in on her from the front.
Ranma perked up at the sheer physicality of Akane’s attacks, watching her as she turned around and crossed bamboo with another kendoka, the sheer strength of her strike causing him to hit himself with his own shinai and knock him back. Two karate club members leaped over the falling kendoka, and twisted themselves out of the way when she turned and swung up at them.
One landed behind her, and charged her back. Taking the shinai, she aimed it over her shoulder and pegged him square in the forehead in it, before slamming it down upon the second club member as he tried to attack her while she was distracted.
Stepping over the flattened boy, she ducked and weaved over more strikes from another kendoka, and parried a few more quick, strikes she couldn’t dodge. This was effective in allowing other boys to surround and move in, weakening Akane’s defensive options.
“Oh, he’s good,” Kodachi said of the kendoka.
Finally taking one hand off the Shinai, she reached up and caught her opponent’s bamboo blade, stopping him long enough to drive the tip of hers into his stomach and fling him into another group of boys.
Flipping the shinai over, she caught it by the handle and assumed a two sword stance, causing Ranma’s eyebrows to raise.
“Is she really going to…?” He asked before she went and did it.
Whirling around, she used both shinai with great effect, knocking down and aside those earnestly foolish enough to attempt to get at her back, while using both bamboo blades to keep a circle open where only the bodies of the defeated lay. Her gaze swept left and right, the smile on her face becoming familiar to Ranma as she waited for the next comer.
She didn’t have to wait long, as three sumo wrestlers came right at her, faces aggressively painted arms outstretched to swamp her before she could do any harm.
It was for naught. With one shinai, she tagged one of the sumo in the ankle, causing him to stagger, before spinning and sweeping him off his feet with both. As he cartwheeled in place, she drove both bamboo swords into his stomach, and he went spinning backward through the other boys. Sweeping the shinai to her sides, she clocked the other two sumo upside their heads, knocking them both out and leaving them crashing to the ground behind her.
And now Ranma was impressed. Not just at the magical things Akane could do with a couple of tightly bound together bamboo sticks, but the sheer, overwhelming joy that Akane was wearing on her face as she did it. It wasn’t like the bloodthirsty smile that he saw with Katie… though it resembled it on the surface. No, Akane was smiling like she this was the first fight she’d ever gotten to enjoy.
“Come on!” Akane called out as she deflected and blocked one fortuitous student’s attempt at striking her with a field hockey stick. “Give me everything!”
She turned away from him as she knocked him off his footing, using the time he spent recovering to similarly duel two more kendoka, knocking one out while capturing the shinai of the other and directing him around her to thrust his shinai into the field hockey player’s chest. She then conked the deflected kendoka atop his head, dropping him straight down.
“Don’t hold back!” She shouted right before another boxer got inside the reach of her bamboo blades and began lightning fast flicker jabs for her head. Bobbing her head, she kept just out of the boxer’s reach, as she hopped back with his footsteps forward. When she brought both shinai up to block his strikes, he simply bashed them both aside with a headbutt and then followed with an uppercut, that Akane avoided by flipping up and away, throwing the shinai in her off hand down at his face and laying him out flat.
Kodachi nodded in approval. “There goes our boxing club captain.”
Taking the shinai in both hands, Akane fell towards a judo club member, who simply held tightly to the belt of his gi, fire burning in his eyes as he braced himself for her attack. When it came, he didn’t move, he didn’t block, he simply yelled his kiai and met the shinai with his forehead.
The shinai didn’t break, but Akane’s momentum went to zero, and the ground buckled beneath the judo student, who screamed again and then lashed out to grab her.
Ranma tensed in excitement when he saw that. Now that was what he wanted to see!
When the judoka’s hand clamped onto her shoulder, Akane twisted out of it, and swung the shinai around, only to have it strong armed by his other hand as he thrust the first to palm her back. Akane swung herself around the other way, catching the judoka behind his knees and forcing them to them. And then back around again she came, striking the burly young man across the chest and dropping him on his back.
Even on a warm pleasant day like this, Akane was running so hot that puffs of condensation were clearly visible with her breath, as she turned and charged towards the remaining horde, who were only growing bolder and more decisive with every show of courage from the the likes of those who could last more than a few seconds against her. With the drive to meet her approval replacing their fear of Tatewaki Kuno, they were beginning to see the potential that Kodachi could see in them!
While Ranma could see that potential himself, that was none of his concern at the moment. All he could see was the beautifully grinning Akane as she lost herself in the thrill of combat. It was so distinct from Katie now. The held back impulse to destroy wasn’t there, instead there was amazement at her own strength, the excitement of avoiding a strike, and the joy of connecting a blow and defeating an opponent who earned it.
He could’ve sworn that she’d never experienced something like this, the fun of a real slap down, drag out brawl. If this were a battlefield, like in the old days, she’d be right up there with himself and Katie, a force of nature that swept through everything in her path!
And… Ranma found that he liked that a lot.
“GAHHHHH!” One of the last remaining attackers, some weird kid on a pogo stick, screamed as he was brought down and left unconscious. This left only Akane and one other kendoka, who was armed with a bokken rather than a shinai.
Akane had been keeping an eye on him, he was one of the smarter ones, lurking around the back of the crowd, watching the fight with vested interest. Akane found him interesting, but there was a problem with his pose and intention–there was a complete lack of excitement in it. Both Kodachi and Ranma noticed it as well.
“This guy’s not from our school,” Ranma realized.
Kodachi nodded. “An excellent observation, he must’ve slipped into the crowd during the gathering of students.” She narrowed her eyes. “A spy from Kolkhoz High School perhaps? Oh Saginomiya, how dare you be so petty…”
“Saginomiya?” Ranma asked.
“Ohohoho, never you mind… that is merely the name of gnat who will soon be crushed,” Kodachi replied.
“If he ain’t from around here, he might be trouble,” Ranma said.
Kodachi disagreed. “I doubt he will be anything more than a footnote in her story of greatness.”
The kendoka tightened his grip, and Akane immediately recognized it. It was nothing like the style of kendo that Tatewaki Kuno drilled into his former subordinates. There was also something ominous about it, clear and real intent to do harm to her.
She just smiled, it was nothing compared to what she felt from her senpai. “Whoever you are, you’re about to make a mistake.”
The masked kendoka just let out a short chuckle, and came right at her, bokken low and body moving fast. His thrust missed as Akane flowed around it, guiding his wooden blade away with her bamboo. What felt like slow-motion suddenly became fast-forward as he recovered from the deflect with all the skill of a professional champion and came at Akane with slashes so fast that the air cracked. Massive, over the head blows mixed with figure-eight patterned swings that were definitely not Kuno’s barrage of forward thrusts.
They were fast, very fast. Strikes glanced off Akane’s armor that she couldn’t deflect with her sword. They came agonizingly close, almost trapping her if not for the slightest twitch, dip, or shift in Akane’s stance. It was here, as this mysterious opponent came with every intent to strike her down rather than survive, that Akane’s smile did take that characteristic of Katie’s… bloodlust seeping in as she recognized this opponent as only an enemy.
Ranma saw it, and he tensed up again. This wasn’t going to end well.
Kodachi, however, was on the verge of drooling as she anticipated the outcome of the duel.
She would not be disappointed, as the kendoka suddenly caught Akane’s shinai as she attempted to parry a strike–then swung the shinai around and around in a circle before knocking the weapon up and out of her hands, straight up. As the shinai flipped upward, and Akane’s gaze was drawn up after it, she realized that she was open right as the kendoka lunged forward, to bring the bokken down on the top of her head.
“Know your place, Furinkan dog!” The swordsman shouted as the blade came down on her head… and hit nothing. “Huh?!”
That’s because the bokken had been snatched from his hands when Akane caught it flat between hers and gently wrenched it free. Twirling the bokken around in her hands, she caught it by its hilt, as her opponent slowly turned towards her, his eyes growing large.
It was at this moment that he knew: he fucked up.
Akane’s newly claimed bokken slammed into his crotch, shattering the skirt armor of his kendo uniform and the cup he wore to protect his berries. The impact came with such force that the bokken shattered as well, as he was lifted off the ground a good meter and a half. Casting the destroyed wooden sword over her shoulder, she kept her hand above her head and caught her shinai by the handle, before taking it in both hands and rearing back to aim a thrust straight for the kendoka’s sternum.
“My place is standing over you… with my heel grinding your head!” She yelled before she fired off the thrust, the tip of the shinai striking her target dead on and accelerating him, not unlike Kuno and Genma as done by Katie, into a terminal flight straight into one of the corner windows of the top floor of the school, where he struck with a loud bang.
Thanks to the building’s renovation and reinforcement, however, all the foolish kendoka left was a smear of blood and drool as he slid down the side of the now mostly glass building to the ground three stories below.
Panting, Akane lowered her shinai and looked around the unconscious or stirring young men she pummeled into the dirt. She then looked over to Kodachi and Ranma, her smile regaining all of its beautiful properties while losing all of the darker aspects. “So, how was that?!”
Kodachi began to applaud, certainly impressed. “That was magnificent, Tendo Akane.”
“Yeah, you were pretty good out there,” Ranma admitted.
Kodachi then gave Ranma a teasing look. “Certainly fine marriage material, wouldn’t you agree, Mr. Fiancé?”
Ranma began to blush somewhat, as he was put on the spot. “I’m not saying she’s not.”
Not at all, in fact… seeing this side of Akane just made the prospect and conflict of marrying one of the Tendo girls all the more difficult. One by one, they were all really starting to show how amazing they were. But admitting it outright brought on so much baggage that he was almost afraid to. Bad enough that he would have to acknowledge his father for bringing him here, but then he would actually have to choose one.
Kodachi whistled, and a number of her handsome gentlemen were at her side in a flash. She then gestured to the beaten young men. “Take them to the infirmary. Our new nursing staff shall administer onto them the finest of care. Do not look down upon them, for they have taken the first step to become fine young men like yourselves.”
“Yes, Kodachi-sama!” The gentlemen chorused before getting to work.
Akane walked over, still a bit huffy. “I’ll have the list of club presidents in a moment, Kodachi-san.”
“Yes, keep that fresh in your head. For now, we must deal with the intruder upon our garden,” Kodachi said as she and Ranma turned towards the unconscious kendoist.
Akane stepped up as well, and nodded. “Yeah, let’s go get Katie-senpai, some discipline is in order.”
|The Devil’s Sympathy|
“What did I tell you, Saotome?” Soun said to his former rival and now best friend as the two of them sat in a bar that was mostly empty due to the early hour of the day. “Tofu-dono does exceptional work.”
Genma was still smarting from being launched by Katie the day before, but as Soun boasted the Tendo family’s physician was surprisingly capable at treating the sort of injuries that came with being launched into the lower atmosphere. “I’m surprised but happy about the quality of work provided.” He could have done without the excessive pain the treatment entailed. “Since I was gone for the time being, how did the boy’s visit go?”
Soun chuckled to hide his nerves. “It went pretty well. I have a feeling the boy is smitten by all three of my daughters in some fashion.”
That came as something of a relief to Genma, long as those three held his interest he didn’t have to worry as much about the likes of those two young women he’d spent the last two nights with. “Finally, something starts going my way.”
Soun, as if compelled by the universe to dash that hope, had to mention something to put the worry back in the elder Saotome. “Just the same, he apparently has taken up residence with those two girls.”
Genma’s eyes widened, as in the background someone entered the bar. “You couldn’t get him to stay the night?!”
“I tried but he was too headstrong for me… and my daughters leapt to his defense.” Soun said in defense of himself. He wasn’t going to mention being scared shitless by Katie though.
Genma appeared mollified by this. “Oh, well at least they’re interested in scoring brownie points with the boy.” He had apparently tired of this point, and moved on the most pressing issue. “I can’t believe I’ve been waylaid by the same girl twice.”
Soun nodded in sympathy. “She is a budding master of Indiscriminate Grappling, even without training in our schools.” That reminded him, there was the thing he didn’t want Genma to know. “Saotome, your son and that girl had a spar last night.”
Genma shrugged it off. “So the boy already avenged me eh?” He laughed for a couple seconds before he realized Soun wasn’t laughing. “Didn’t he?”
Soun shook his head sadly. “It was a close contest, but she won. He was magnificent though and had she been a little more traditional, he would have defeated her soundly.”
The boy lost?! Well that was three times that this girl has humiliated him. “Tendo, we have to do something about that girl.”
While Soun would readily agree that there was something wrong with the young lady Izland, and felt that her association with not only Ranma but the rest of his family didn’t have a positive outlook going, he had his reservations about confronting the girl about it. “What do you reckon by ‘do something about her’?”
“I mean as long as she’s going to be around, she’s going to be an extremely bad influence on my boy, and upon your girls too!” He shot back, inadvertently reminding Soun of why they were friends–they more often than not thought alike. “It’s one thing to convince him to throw away his manhood by embracing his curse, but it’s another thing entirely to beat him!”
He pounded his fist on the bar top. “I trained my son to never lose–except to me, but even that’s happening less nowadays–do you have any idea what it means to have some girl, out of nowhere mind you, show up and defeat him?!”
“She’s skilled, Saotome,” Soun lamented. “Whoever trained her, trained her as well as you trained your son.”
Though there was certainly a darker intent behind the training. Ranma was trained to master the art, certainly, but Katie was trained to use it.
Genma, however, could not let go of his lost pride. “That doesn’t matter, my son is the best! He’s not supposed to lose, especially not to some shifty-eyed, nosy, meddling girl too tall for her own damn good!”
The curtains draped halfway over the otherwise fully opened front doors of the bar shifted and then were pushed aside, as a figure stepped in. A foreigner wearing steel toe boots, khaki pants, and a matching vest over a gray shirt. He also wore a well-worn dark brown fedora, the right side of the wide brim pinned up against the side of the hat with what appeared to be a senbon needle.
He loped over to the counter, where the older, stern-looking bartender watched him with narrowed eyes. Without preamble, he reached the stool at Soun’s left and dropped himself down on it, before calling to the bartender and slipping a few yen please. “Biggest mug you’ve got, Sapporo.”
The bartender nodded his head, and soon enough a tall, frosted mug of beer was set in front of the foreigner, who lifted it up and took a long, slow sip. “Afternoon, gentlemen.”
Genma immediately pretended that he wasn’t spoken to by the foreigner, as Soun was closer to him. Left on the spot, Soun grew a bit tense, before he brought a closed fist to his lips and cleared his throat.
“Hello, can my companion or I help you?” He asked.
“No, but I think I can help you,” the foreigner replied in a polite, gentlemanly fashion. “I was walking by outside this nice establishment, when I heard some fairly unkind words about a young woman. As a man whom many people seek to solve their problems for them, I thought I’d come on over and offer you a bit of assistance on this one of yours.”
Soun gave Genma a look, his little outburst had been heard all the way outside? How embarrassing. “Pardon my friend, he is just frustrated over… well… a young woman that has been getting into scraps with him.”
“A woman, huh?” The foreigner looked past Soun, at Genma. “An ex-lover? Baby-mama drama?”
“Don’t be absurd, I’m a married man with a wife who loves me!” Genma snapped back. “This problematic woman is a high school girl who doesn’t know to mind her own business!”
“People not staying in their own lane? I, ironically, can empathize with your plight.” The foreigner replied. “Tell me more about it?”
Genma scowled, and took a sip from his small dish of sake. He could never turn down someone willing to pay him some sympathy. “The girl’s a damn savage, beating up on both my son and I, completely unprovoked. Kicked me in the head twice, like she wanted to kill me!”
The foreign man whistled in sympathy. “That’s pretty rough for ya man. Sounds like she was trained by a right cool son of a bitch, though.”
Soun took exception to that. “Cool? There’s nothing ‘cool’ in training a girl that young to kill!”
“Hey now, man, the world’s a dangerous place. Rapists an’ Monsters an’ aliens an’ shit running around. A girl ought to know how to kill so she can walk to school with some peace of mind.”
Genma dismissed that outright. “What would a killer know about peace of mind?”
The foreigner snorted. “What kinda killer leaves someone they’re trying to kill alive?”
Soun paused to consider that, having lost whatever sanctimonious thing he was going to say because of the sudden burst of logic.
Genma wasn’t having any of that think before you speak shit though. “Just because I am so very durable doesn’t mean anyone else should be so lucky!”
“A fair point,” the other man conceded, before circumventing that point entirely like some kind of living snakeman. “But if this girl was just a mindless killer, wouldn’t it make more sense that she’d incapacitate ya before killing ya? No matter how tough yer body is, your brain gets shook and ya go down.”
Genma faltered, unable to come up with a suitable argument at the moment.
Soun wanted to pick up the fight but found himself trying to get around the logic and unable to do so.
“Now if you’ll allow me one final point, knowledge of how to kill ain’t the same as the will to kill.” The foreigner seemed to rest his case at that.
Genma, unable to fight the argument, went to fight the guy. “You seem to know a lot about this girl despite your alleged impartiality.”
The foreigner hummed. “Well, she certainly reminds me of a girl that I dropped off here some time back to do some work for a friend of a friend. I suppose that’s why I feel so compelled to defend her honor from a salty bastard crying about how she beat him and his boy.”
Genma resisted the urge to growl, but his voice did raise. “Just who are you anyways?”
“Nicholas Fontaine Sherman,” the man introduced himself, “My niece is a shifty-eyed, nosy, too tall for her own good type o’ gal named Katie Izland.” His tone then dropped from easy-going and polite, to menacingly calm. “I hope that name doesn’t ring a bell to you gentlemen.”
Soun and Genma reacted exactly how two cowards who were used to bullying the weak around to get what they want ran into someone potentially stronger than them: complete and utter panic. Soun gibbered a little while Genma sucked on his teeth as if to stifle a scream. All in all, it wasn’t quite as bad a display it could have been.
“Well now,” Nick drawled, “looks like you two do know something. Good to know my ‘awareness’ hasn’t led me wrong.”
He turned on the stool, and took another sip of his beer. “So, tell me a little bit more details, guys. What exactly has my niece been up to since I left her here? I have expectations, y’see.”
Self-preservation immediately kicked in for Genma, who immediately scanned the room for anything he might find to put in between him and this awkward situation and escape. So far, it was looking like he’d have to bail on Soun–which was for the best, since he was paying for this round of drinks to begin with.
That wasn’t to say that Soun wasn’t looking for an easy way out, though. “Well, ahem, your daughter is skilled as a martial artist. My friend here, his son enjoyed fighting her, in spite of the outcome. She also gets along well with my daughters.”
Well, with Akane of course, Kasumi seemed taken enough with her, and she wasn’t Nabiki’s enemy at least.
“No shit?” Nick’s tone ticked right back up to pleasant. “Well, if things are all hunky-dory then I’m glad. She’s had trouble makin’ friends, you see? Her last pals turned out to be pretty savage backstabbers, or straight up crazy–I’ve still got one out there who wants to break her spine like a dry twig.”
He slapped his hand on the top of the bar again, revealing a bit more yen. “What do you say I buy your next few drinks there? Just you, though.” He then indicated Genma. “Your buddy there can sit and spin.”
Soun, ever the balanced individual (and sensing that Genma was seconds away from abandoning him to this wolf), quite eagerly accepted the offer. “Well, I can’t possibly say no to that sort of generosity. I’m Tendo Soun.”
Nick was all smiles. “Good to meet ya, Tendo-san. And who’s your friend eyeing the door over there? You know, the dipshit?”
“Saotome Genma,” Soun replied, and an arrow of betrayal went right into Genma’s back.
Nick then, unexpectedly, underwent a dramatic transformation–going from maliciously amused to outright wide-eyed with surprise. “D-did you say Saotome Genma?”
Genma froze, right as he was about to leap off the stool and dash straight out of the door. Soun was taken off guard by Nick’s sudden recognition as well.
Nick looked directly at him. “Saotome Genma, of the Saotome School of Indiscriminate Grappling? The Saotome Genma, husband of Saotome Nodoka, and father of Saotome Ranma?”
Well, if Genma’s blood had been cold before in the face of a stronger opponent, it was now an icy slush that threatened to stop his heart. He turned back to face Nick, ready to go on the defensive in case this strange man had some sort of grudge against him for something else. How did he know so much about him? Even the name of his wife?!
“I am that Saotome Genma…” He said, gruffly despite his trepidation.
“Huh,” Nick said, “Small world. Hey, forgive my previous rudeness… I didn’t realize I was in the presence of a legend.”
And now Genma was confused. “E-excuse me?”
“You’ve got a reputation that precedes you, especially in my community,” Nick gestured to the bar. “Help yourself to the top shelf at my expense, my friend. You’ve earned it.” To Soun he nodded. “You too, Tendo-san. I didn’t think we’d all be so closely interconnected like this. Our kids all meetin’ and becoming friends.”
And now Genma was not confused. “Oh, well that is generous of you.”
Soun would’ve found Nick’s sudden flip-flopping odd, but the promise of top shelf alcohol and a lack of animosity from the foreigner dashed those concerns.
“Well, in my lifetime I’ve learned that it’s good to clear the air of any misunderstandings, especially for the benefit of the kids, you know? And while Katie may be my niece, but I’ve raised her like a daughter for thirteen summers and at least two winters.”
She certainly had some martial artists’ chops if most of that raising involved the sort of training that made her into a beast that rivaled Ranma, Soun reasoned. “You’ve taken good care of her.”
Nick nodded again. “You betcha. I still look out for her; hence my sticking my nose in here… and well… why I decided to come here from two neighborhoods over in the first place. On that note, I have a question:”
He looked between Soun and Genma, as he asked this question. “You wouldn’t happen to know anyone petty enough to put an 700,000 yen bounty on my niece’s head for her ‘complete and utter humiliation’, would you?”
And just like that, Soun knew.
|Card Shark|
At a round poker table in the school’s stuffy gymnasium equipment shed, Nabiki rapidly shuffled a deck of cards overhand. Across from her, Katie sat in a folding chair, relaxed as she watched her classmate continuously shuffle the cards. After a few shuffles, Nabiki made the deck nice and neat before setting it down on the table.
“Draw the first five off the top,” Nabiki instructed.
Katie looked at Nabiki, then down at the cards, before reaching over and drawing–one by one–an Ace, a King, a Queen, a Jack, and a Ten of Hearts. She looked down at the hand in surprise, then back up at Nabiki. This was the third time in as many shuffles that Nabiki had successfully put the Royal Flush on top for her to draw.
“How?” She asked as she set the cards back down for Nabiki to scoop up. The cards weren’t altered in any way, no shaved edges, no thinner cardboard, nothing.
Nabiki smiled and stacked the five cards up before sweeping them back into the deck, her eyes not leaving it. “It’s all about keeping your eye on the birdy.”
She then began to shuffle again, working the five cards of the royal flush down to the bottom of the deck, then shuffling the brick of cards until they were back at the top. Cutting the cards, she riffled the decks back together, then shuffled them again, before setting the deck back down.
“Top five, please,” Nabiki said.
Katie did as instructed. Getting this time three aces, a King of Diamonds, and a King of Clubs. She looked up at Nabiki, not as impressed.
Nabiki smirked, and then lifted the rest of the deck, leaving only the bottom five cards. Fanning those five out, she flipped the bottom one, so the others flipped in sequence, revealing the Royal Flush of Hearts.
Katie recoiled. “Yo…”
“You learn how the dealer stacks and controls the deck, and keep an eye on your cards, then you can make any hand you want as you deal,” Nabiki said, “Or more importantly, you can play your hands while knowing who has what card in theirs. You don’t need to do anything. You just need to know when to hold'em and know when to fold‘em.”
“That’s pretty generous, teaching a trick like that,” Katie said, somewhat subdued.
“Hey now, you’re paying me a ridiculous sum of money for my loyalty, and I’d like to be able to tap that resource in the future,” Nabiki replied.
Katie briefly narrowed her eyes, but then schooled her expression again to its normal cool indifference. “I could think of a few ways to keep that pipe open.”
Nabiki was quick on the uptake, and headed off the innuendo at the pass. “Starting by laying it?”
She gathered up the cards and began shuffling. This time she just stared at Katie, waiting for her reaction.
“I was thinking more dinner and dancing, but hey…” Katie replied off-handedly.
Nabiki’s lips turned up slightly. “I bet you think about it.”
Katie’s poker face didn’t waver. “A girl with tastes like mine thinks about it often–the dinner and dancing part, that is.”
Nabiki stopped shuffling and riffling, and dealt five cards between her and Katie. When Katie picked up her hand, she found it fairly solid. Four of a kind, all nines, and an Ace of Spades. Picking up her hand, Nabiki looked at it and began adjusting her cards.
“I bet you’d like a taste,” she said.
“Well I am a girl with high standards.” She had deliberately gone for that, and found Nabiki unfazed. Looking back down at her hand, she decided to test out Nabiki’s poker face. “Want to put it on the table?”
Nabiki looked up. “On this hand? Sure, I bet one round of no-strings attached, purely hedonistic making out between you and I.” A cheeky smile appeared on her face. “But you’d better offer me something of equal value, or you’re never getting another chance.”
Dealing with the house, especially when she was a card controlling master, was never a sure win. She may have had a four of a kind, but there was no telling what hand Nabiki had going. It could be a weaker hand, anticipating a fold, or a stronger hand tempting her to win. It was always safer to walk away if you could.
“I fold,” she said, dropping the cards onto the table.
Nabiki threw her hand on the table, revealing a hand full of rags–all low rank cards. “You give up too easily.”
Looking at the cards, Katie frowned. “Damn it.”
Gathering up the cards, Nabiki riffled them, then shuffled. Cutting the deck into fours, she brought the outer two together, and then the inner two, before riffling the two reassembled decks back into one. She dealt out, in quick succession five cards to herself and Katie, before picking up her own hand, Four of a Kind right out the gate.
“What do I have?” She asked.
Katie stopped, and looked up. “Wait, what?”
She gestured to her hand. “Have you been paying attention at all, or were you too excited by the prospect of ‘dinner and dancing’ to notice? What cards do I have in my hand?”
Katie immediately blanched, when she realized that she hadn’t been paying attention to the cards at all. “… Fuck!”
Nabiki nodded. “That’s what I thought. Well? At least take a guess.”
Katie looked back at her hands, a Straight of Spades. That gave her no indication of Nabiki’s hand, worse still, she’d really been distracted by Nabiki’s flirting, so she lost track of the Royal Flush. “I don’t know, um…?”
Down came Nabiki’s hand, revealing a Straight Flush of Clubs. Looking from it to Nabiki, Katie frowned in defeat. “… I see, yeah.”
“Poker players are all about mind games, and I love them dearly, myself. You’re not good enough now or in two days to play the long game, so just focus on counting the cards and throwing him off his. Make him tilt first and you’ll just have a nice night of poker to talk about to your turkey baster babies one day.”
“Ooh, dyke jokes, painful,” Katie dryly replied. “But yeah, I’ll do that.”
Nabiki gestured to the shitty cards and Katie’s own. “Now, pay attention to these cards.” She swept back up the cards and began reshuffling them. “No matter how good looking I am, you need to win.”
One complicated shuffle later, and Nabiki dealt herself and Katie the cards before picking up her hand. Katie found herself with a four of a kind 10s and a King. “What do I have?”
“… A losing hand,” Katie said, her eyes glued to the cards and nothing else. Nabiki had dealt herself the majority of the same rags she had before.
Nabiki nodded as she turned over a pile of yuck with an 8 as her high card. “See? Even if you learn nothing else, with this you can always keep from losing the big hand.”
Katie nodded, beginning to understand. ‘Yeah, that’d help. Even if I can’t win everything, I can save myself.”
Again the cards were gathered. “Count the cards and keep cool. People lose focus on the goal and become easy prey for mind games.” She held up this time the Ace of Spades. “Now then, follow the Ace.”
Katie nodded as she focused on the cards. “It’s how you end up having a proxy playing for you because you have nothing else to bet.”
“Luck is for losers, you’re never going to hit that miracle one-shot turn around except in a tournament.” Nabiki said as she dealt the cards. “Let’s mix it up: Do I have the ace in my hand?”
Katie, having been paying attention again, shook her head. “Nope.”
She reached down and drew not from the top of the deck, but the bottom, pulling out the Ace of Spades.
“Progress, though maybe I should pop my top a little and see if your focus can hold.” Nabiki said as she gathered the cards again.
“If you wanna get naked, by all means.” Katie said, shrugging. “I won’t complain.”
“Ha, ha, you’re a terrible flirt–literally, you’re bad at it.” Nabiki showed Katie the hand, four Kings and a Queen, and reshuffled the cards. “Follow the Kings.”
Katie focused again and little by little, as Nabiki shuffled and reshuffled the cards and showed her hand after hand. One card at a time, five cards at a time, as Nabiki ordered her to follow this card or the other, she began to know the places of each, memorizing their positions as her eyes followed the deft movements of Nabiki’s hands.
After a certain point, her focus tightened to the point, the world began to be swallowed by black. She could no longer see the stuffy room, just Nabiki shuffling the cards over and over.
One of the first things she learned from her Uncle was tapping into this supreme focus that let her read things beyond the norm. Because of the energy needed, she saved it for battle when she needed to process things faster and read even the most minute detail. And all because of the warm feeling it left her with, the name her Uncle gave it was fairly apt.
The melodic hum of Nabiki’s heart, the suave rhythm of her breath, the sharpness of the cards cutting the air even as they appeared to be going in slow motion. All of this was present before her eyes. As if she was looking from on high, peering past the illusions of the world to see the truth she need.
Hence why her Uncle named it ‘Heaven’.
Katie blinked and the world returned just in time for Nabiki to deal the cards again. Without even lifting them, Katie knew they were the four kings in the hand, alongside a Queen of Hearts.
“Who has the Kings?” Nabiki asked, making a show of picking up her cards.
Katie didn’t even try to pick them up. “I do.”
Nabiki stopped, and looked at the cards before back up at her. Just like that? Well, this was interesting…
“Very nice.” Nabiki congratulated, showing a full house of Jacks and Tens, before flipping Katie’s over to reveal the cards that she indicated. “Be cool, be focused, and follow the cards.”
“Basically, be you.” Katie summarized as Nabiki collected the cards.
“You’re not cool enough to be me.” Nabiki snapped back, the irritated twang in her heartbeat told Katie that she was not appreciative of the humor when she was trying to be serious. It was almost not even there and had Katie not been focusing on Nabiki, she’d have missed it completely.
Nabiki shuffled the cards again, making a bigger show of moving them. With the show, came the more complex game of shuffling and deck manipulation. The cards flowed like water in her hands, Nabiki getting even fancier with her tricks. It was time to really mix it up, and she did–dealing herself and Katie each two cards before quickly shuffling the deck again, and then dealing out the rest. “You may have to keep up with a number of different shuffles. Don’t want him to pick up on it.”
Katie didn’t need the lecture but appreciated it anyways. “Right, if he catches on, he might run out before I’ve won.”
“You may also need to lose a few hands, to keep yourself honest. What are my cards?”
“Full house, sevens full of sixes.” Katie replied after a second to replay which cards were moving where in her head.
“Without looking, is your hand the winner?” Nabiki pressed on further.
Katie shook her head. “Nah, I’m an ace short of four of a kind, or a king or queen shy of a full boat.”
Nabiki swept the cards back from Katie. “Remember, focus.”
Katie nodded, choosing to focus on the subtle jiggle Nabiki’s chest did while breathing. “Focus.”
Nabiki did her most expressive shuffle yet, almost juggling the cards at one point. She dealt the cards, shuffling into between each card really trying to throw Katie off.
The deck had barely been set down and Nabiki hadn’t even moved to her cards when Katie quickly flipped her own. “Royal flush.” Her gaze was locked on Nabiki, she hadn’t even looked at the cards while they were being dealt.
Under other circumstances, Nabiki might have frowned. But she was being paid to turn a total amateur into someone capable of beating a guy who called himself the Gambling King at his own game. Maybe it wouldn’t all be cheating.
She swept the cards up and began to shuffle, jerking back ever so slightly faster than usual.
Katie managed to keep her head straight as her eyes stayed level with Nabiki’s chest. “Heaven” indeed.
Nabiki dealt five cards each at high speed, not really trying to give Katie a chance to see them.
It didn’t matter. Katie nodded again. “You won.”
Nabiki swept up the cards and shuffled again, there wasn’t any need to declare it. She said nothing, only doing her best to vary her shuffles and cuts. It’d almost be too much if not for that advice to focus.
Focus is exactly what Katie did, on the cards and the dealer. She had been annoyed at having to pay Nabiki just a little bit, but the money was to keep her honest. Going through Kasumi would only have so much effect, and if Katie just didn’t learn enough to win it wasn’t Nabiki’s fault. There’d be no room for error, she was going to smash this asshole that was encroaching on her paradise.
The cards were dealt in rapid succession. Nabiki set the deck down for a second and waited.
“Four of a kind Aces, to a Kings full of 10s. I won.” Katie said, looking at the cards just so Nabiki didn’t catch on to what she was actually focused on.
“Okay, she’s doing something different now,” Nabiki finally caught on. She couldn’t even tell if Katie was looking at the cards as she shuffled them again, this time dipping further into her repertoire of card tricks than she had before..
Katie looked down at the board to see two pair of kings and queens getting punched in the taint by a straight. She tapped the table. “You won, ten high straight mix of diamonds and clubs.”
“You’re really getting good at this.” Nabiki said, Katie allowing the girl’s face to fade back into her view. There’s nothing there to lead the Izland lass into whether Nabiki is happy about that.
“I have a great teacher.” Katie said without sounding like she was trying to butter the other girl up. “And I can focus real good.”
“Is this how you beat Ranma?” Nabiki asked, her voice betrayed no emotions. It’s only the slight twang of the breath she exhaled with it that gave away that she was unhappy to see him lose.
“We were both thinking at top speed.” Katie replied, scanning the contours of the girl’s face and finding she liked them after a fashion. “He just didn’t consider everything a 3D environment and I did. The armbar was inspired but he couldn’t take my legs from under me. Flying armbars are cool but we’re not in some safe and sanitized place, fighting by strict rules to avoid getting hurt.”
“We don’t run a McDojo you know?” Nabiki said with a sardonic smirk. “It’s too bad most of our students were such cowardly pussies, because we’d be doing a lot better for the future of the dojo than a hail mary pass to a prodigal son-in-law.”
Without focusing, Katie wouldn’t have known that Nabiki’s breathing changed when she was annoyed. That subtle shift despite completely dispassionate look and tone was the one hole no one could have ever possibly known.
Without that focus, Katie wouldn’t have finally figured out what was really eating Nabiki’s ass about one Kaitlin Izland. She’d still be groping around in the dark, chasing red herrings like the business and the money. She’d remain clueless of the real thing she needed to address between them to turn them from casual antagonists who could join forces if circumstances called for it into something more along the lines of what Katie wanted.
But she did and so she decided to call it out. “Are you jealous of Akane’s martial arts talent?” That wasn’t it, but it was an attempt at feigning ignorance.
Nabiki’s reaction, as viewed under “Heaven”, was almost comical to watch. The subtle hiss of the sucked in breath that happened too fast for the middle Tendo’s icy facade to halt it. The flare of her nostrils, the snarl that almost breaks out on her face before everything becomes placid. Her features are perfectly schooled before she gave a response.
“Why would I be jealous of Akane?” It’s a fair question, one to imply an inferred superiority that made such a claim preposterous.
Nabiki isn’t focused like Katie is and missed that the question had been a bait. Katie hooked her right in the mouth and was reeling her in for the next blow. “Oh, sorry, I misspoke. I meant, are you jealous of my martial arts ability?”
The girl in question refused to answer, switching to shuffling the cards. The cadence of the shuffling was almost ingrained in Katie’s mind though, it didn’t serve as the distraction it was intended to be. The folding, the cutting, nothing. Even the crisp snap of the cards when Nabiki finished didn’t waver her attention.
The deal was uncharacteristically forceful, like there was the denial the dealer refused to verbalize.
It still didn’t help. “You have a spade suited royal flush.” Katie answered the unspoken question and now the spotlight was back on Nabiki.
Nabiki swept the cards up and thought about the question. It seemed to stupid that Katie would even dare ask, of course Nabiki was jealous! Why wouldn’t she be? Someone just so happened to saunter on in, pleased as fucking punch, and had the audacity to be everything she had wanted to be but had been denied by reality. It was infuriating, even more so that Katie had the same cool, detached demeanor and everything!
“I…” Nabiki started, before she swallowed the emotion and froze it out. She was going to push this aside. “If I said I was, what would be your response?” It was meant to be a probing question, to push back Katie by making the answer focus on herself.
But it still didn’t help, because the answer was obvious. “Flattered, you’re actually pretty awesome.”
The stark honesty rattled the cage that was Nabiki Tendo. The ice cracked and her heart beat kicked up for a few seconds at the surprising answer. She gasped a little, unnoticeable except to anyone looking for it.
For the fleeting half-second it lasted, she saw a faint twinkle of emotion. She caught how Nabiki’s ears seemed to flush instead of her face and even the awkward shuffle to hide them under her hair. Nabiki was completely off guard and vulnerable right now.
Her tongue moistened suddenly dry lips and for the first time in years Nabiki Tendo has no quip back. There was no biting witticism to win back the ground lost. Katie now knew something she was not supposed to, and Nabiki had no words to bring it back. Her keen mind fumbled and groped at the words, trying to puzzle out the order to say them to try and keep the other girl at bay.
“Oh really?” Nabiki’s voice is barely a whisper. She didn’t trust herself to keep from snapping and snarling and ruining her reputation any further.
“Yeah, I wish I could have your nerve. It kind of drives me crazy” Katie admitted.
“You’re envious… of me?” Nabiki asked, voice hissing disbelief and an anger hidden deep within. If Katie is yanking her chain, things are promised to get messy.
“You’re all calm and collected no matter what.” Katie said, shrugging slightly. “Around here, where there are monsters like Ranma or your sister or me walking around happy to do whatever we want through brute force, you act like we’re nothing to you–even when you know that with a careless swing any one of us could break you in half. How can I not like that confidence?”
Nabiki hit the table with the deck of cards, to control her reaction. “You don’t need it.”
“It wouldn’t hurt,” Katie argued, “Because there are things out there that I’m terrified of.”
It went without saying, that Nabiki would treat it with her usual cool indifference, because Nabiki caught the inference. That actually caused the heat at the tips of her ears to spread towards the edges of her cheeks, but she fought it off well, burying it in silence. She looked at the time and the session was drawing to a close. Of course, there were going to be more on the horizon until the match actually happened.
She spoke, without looking at her. “Our time is almost up. To recap, what do you need to do to win?”
“Keep calm and focus.” Katie replied like a dutiful student. She’d let Nabiki get away for now. Under the ice, Nabiki was a mess of tinder. Give it a spark and she’d ignite, something Katie wanted to be able to see.
“That’s right. We’ll practice more of my shuffles another time” Nabiki avoided eye contact and simply focused on putting the deck away. “This is your best shot so let’s not blow it.”
“Wouldn’t dream of it.” Katie reassured her classmate.
They sat in silence for a few minutes, before Nabiki left once the time had been up. Katie sat there a minute longer, thinking about things that she had learned today. She then smiled and laughed as she got up and strolled out.
|Hello/Goodbye|
One toast had become many, and a mid-afternoon visit became an all-day bender before an annoyed bartender finally shoved Soun, Genma, and their new best friend out of the door, the three men singing rather loudly about the importance of being drunk in Japanese society, to deaden the pain of existing in such a fucked up country.
“Hahahaha!” Genma laughed. “When you think about it, life is pretty awful!”
Soun agreed. “It’s a miracle we have alcohol! Who knows what we’d do if we didn’t drink!”
“Or fight!” Nick tossed in.
“Or fuck!” Genma bellowed, and all three nearly fell over in hysterics.
Soun, who was held up between the two, became the pillar that supported all three, standing tall until the other two men managed to regain their balance. Genma was first, throwing back his head and laughing until he let out a belch, while Nick was a bit slower, the hand of the arm not draped over Soun’s shoulders clamped over his face as he chuckled continuously.
“We should… we should get back home…” Soun said. “It’s almost time for dinner and it’s important to eat after you drink… so you don’t get sick…”
“That’s the other way around, Tendo! Eat before, and then you don’t… pffhahaha…” Genma tried to explain, and Soun just laughed at how silly he was for getting it wrong.
Nick then shouted to the sky. “I AM REALLY DRUNK!”
All three almost fell, but this time Nick and Genma stopped to support Soun. Over alcohol and stories both heroic and horrifying, the three martial artists bonded as men, comparing scars and boasting of great accomplishments. It wasn’t long before this man, Nicholas Fontaine Sherman, was their best friend, comrade in arms, and fellow traveler down the path of the fist. And he probably would be even after the alcohol wore off!
“You should c’mon over to the house, my friend!” Soun insisted. “My daughter, Kasumi… Kasumi’s a wonderful cook, you’d love her…”
Nick laughed. “I would… God I would… heh heh heh…” He patted Soun on the back. “But I have my own home to get to, and a missus waitin’ in bed for me.”
“Lucky man!” Genma declared. “A wife who knows where to await her husband!”
Soun was surprised. “Your wife’s here, in Japan?”
Nick nodded. “Yeah, yeah, we just got married the other day. Did I not mention that?”
“Well congratulations! Let’s go back and toast again!” Soun suggested.
Genma looked back and saw the bartender cracking his knuckles and giving them a killing stare. “Let’s not!”
“Okay!” Soun and Nick shouted together.
The three men leaned against each other, laughing uproariously. In all honesty, they could all easily take the bartender apart, but they were too drunk to really notice or care. Who needed some random jerk who hated money to kill their vibe? All three men were well and capable of doing that by themselves.
On that note, Nick let out another small laugh, and nudged Soun in the side. “Hey, hey, Tendo… hey…”
As Genma continued chuckling, Soun turned to Nick. “Yes, my friend?”
“I have… I have a secret to tell you… it’s… it’s pretty good… check this out…” He looked at Genma, and then leaned over and began whispering something very quietly into his ear.
Soun stopped laughing, and his eyes widened before he looked Nick dead in the eyes, as if hit by a sudden moment of clarity. “Really?!”
“That’s how I know so much about him, man,” Nick insisted. “It’s crazy.”
Soun nodded slowly, before he laughed. “Wow, well… someone has to do it, I guess.”
Nick then wore a rather twisted smile. “I know, right?”
Saotome’s laughter finally eased, as he looked towards the two whispering, chuckling men. “Hey, what’s so funny?”
Nick chuckled. “It’s a secret, well… a surprise. You’ll find out. Anyway, I’ve had my fun y’all, so I gotta go give the missus what she’s been needin’, you know?”
Genma knew. “Ha, ha! Give her one for me, Sherman!”
Nick broke away from Soun and began to saunter back, laughing. “Oh I’ll make her scream like a banshee buddy, don’t you worry!”
He walked on, laughing hysterically, his hand clasped over his face to cover it as he staggered away, looking more like a maniac who just got away with murder than a harmless drunkard walking home from a night with friends.
Genma laughed and waved off after him, before leaning back against Soun, still chuckling. “You know, I’m willing to give that girl a second chance. Who knows, I might even be able to crib something off that style of ‘is.”
Soun laughed a bit more, and then nodded. “Sounds great, Saotome… now… now let’s get on home… Kasumi doesn’t like to be kept waiting.”
Step by step, the two began walking towards the house, still laughing rather uproariously. Genma because he knew that everything was going to be perfectly fine, like he always knew it would be. Soun because he was too drunk to realize it wouldn’t.
With the two out of his hair, Nick strolled from the neighborhood of Furinkan towards another part of the Nerima Ward he called home for several obvious reasons. A neighborhood that, when compared to it, made Furinkan seem like a balanced and stable community. The 2000s San Francisco alongside 1980s Oakland.
This was the neighborhood known as Tomobiki.
“What an interesting day,” he said as he walked towards a nice, if small house not down the street from the high school that gave the neighborhood its dubious name. Walking in through the front door, he strolled past the sitting room, where an attractive woman in her 30s sat watching television, and towards the bedroom.
“I had hoped to see Katie, but instead I learned so much, so that was cool,” he said when he reached the bedroom and turned on the light. Spread across the wall opposite of him, directly above the bed was a large blue kimono, decorated with red and black hanafuda cards, and hanging above it was a plain black hat.
“But still…” He turned and went to the wall to his left, pulling out a small photograph of Nabiki, graciously offered to him by Soun during their drinking. “Nabiki Tendo…”
Licking the back of the picture, he slapped it against the wall, where it stuck. “Putting money on my niece’s head.”
He turned and walked over to the opposite side of the room and a vanity, where a matte black box sat. Opening it, he pulled out a long, black knife, that he weighed and examined in his hand with care. He nodded slowly, and ran the flat of the blade against his face, teasing shaving the well-kept black beard on his face.
Then he turned and whipped it at the wall, just as the temporary adhesive of his saliva fell. It was no longer needed, as the knife pinned the picture of Nabiki into the wall.
“Definitely… un… cool…” He breathed as he let his eyes linger on the picture, and his thoughts on what he would do to the genuine article.
|Bark at the Moon|
In the late mists of the night, on the outskirts of Nerima, if you listened closely you would hear the padding footfalls of a wolf. It was a larger than ordinary fare, with a coat of nigh-Obsidian fur shaking as it ran along. Nostrils flared as it tracked its prey, there was an icy chill in its grey-blue eyes as it peered around the area for clues. Most curiously, around its neck was a bandana, which had a curious tiger stripe pattern.
Those who had observed the wolf in passing would regard it as a figment of their imagination, for what wolf hunted alone? It was too big to call just a mere wolf, it seemed to be so much more. And so on the majestic beast ran, hunting after whatever quarry such a large beast might have.
Behind the wolf, a purple haired girl jogged after it, she was carrying two large packs. She was dressed in a conservative blouse and tights combo, though they both hugged her curves and gave a sense that modesty was something people lectured her on and she just didn’t get. Her slippers slapped against the pavement as she tried to keep up but it seemed her companion had finally gotten a whiff of the trail.
“You is wait!” The girl cried, pausing to take a steadying breath as she adjusted the packs. “Wait for Shampoo!”
The chase continued as girl and wolf ran towards their target through the fading mists of the night, melding into the dream-like world that was the Nerima Ward.
Ah yes, I get it. It can't just be that I find Katie boring and would find the story more interesting if she were a secondary character with things focusing on Akane, Ranma and the radically altered school environment. I must be longing for the worst elements of fanfics of ages past. I can't actually be disinterested by her ability to seduce anything with panties and a pulse, I must be wanting Ranma to secure a harem instead of her.
Thank you ever so much for using your vast telepathic abilities to read my mind and tell me what I want to see. Truly you are a power to rival Charles Xavier.
Thank you ever so much for using your vast telepathic abilities to read my mind and tell me what I want to see. Truly you are a power to rival Charles Xavier.