The sickest challenge ever response


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Posted by Alzrius in response to Runestar's incredibly sick Keitaro/Hina challenge...


Hina stretched, yawning widely as she entered HarukaÆs teahouse, enjoying the way the few patrons who were there this early looked at her, either aghast at her rude behavior or staring at how her chest was thrust out as she popped her back. Plopping down on a stool in front of the bar, she grinned at her daughter. ôMorning Haruka.ö

ôMom.ö Haruka, already smoking, nodded to the younger girl politely. She loved her mother, but it still annoyed her that she was nearing thirty, and her mother now had the body of an eighteen year-old. She kept her dislike to herself though, since Hina had promised to share the location of the youth-restoring hot spring once Haruka was older.

Ducking under the counter for a moment, Haruka retrieved a stack of notes, standing back up and putting them down on the bar in front of Hina. ôHere, these are for you.ö

Hina slumped over, groaning. She already knew what they were, but she had to ask anyway. ôWhat are they?ö

ôMore messages from those two idiots.ö

ôI knew it.ö Hina let her head hit the bar in exasperation. Sleeping with those two û what were their names again? Hirai and Shaitani? û was proving itself to be the first mistake of her new life.

In hindsight, it had seemed harmless and fun. Once the hot spring had restored her youth, Hina had reveled in not only being able to measure her remaining life in decades instead of years, but also in how her beauty had been restored, along with menopause being undone. It had all added up to her being eager to do something she hadnÆt done in years: have sex.

After getting back to Hinata, sheÆd nearly pounced on the first guys who had hit on her, and sheÆd thought sheÆd been lucky to have it happen to be two guys at once. TheyÆd seemed nice enough, and while theyÆd never draw crowds of girls, they werenÆt bad-looking either. So Hina, eager to feel an orgasm for the first time in decades, had hungrily dragged them both to the nearest love hotel and proceeded to fuck their brains out.

Unfortunately, the two of them hadnÆt quite seemed to pick up on the hints that sheÆd dropped afterward about that being just a fling, and sheÆd stupidly let it slip that she was staying at Hinata Sou. Now they wouldnÆt leave her alone, leaving messages everyday pleading for another romp in the sack. Hina might even have considered it, except for one thing: the two of them were terrible lovers. Even though there had been two of them, and even though Hina had been exceptionally horny from the prospect of doing it again after so long, sheÆd had to struggle to reach an orgasm, while those two had gotten off twice each.

Sighing, Hina took the pile of messages and dumped them in a nearby trash can. ôThe next time they call, just threaten them with harassment, or castration, I donÆt care which,ö said Hina tiredly. The entire thing was leaving a bad taste in her mouth, and not just from having gone down on them. To Hina, it was a bitter reminder that no matter how long youÆd lived, you never accumulated enough wisdom to keep from making stupid mistakes.

Trying to forget about the entire thing, she changed the subject. ôSo, whereÆs Kanako? I havenÆt seen her around since I got back.ö

ôKanako?ö HarukaÆs eyebrows rose marginally. ôYou havenÆt heard?ö

ôNo. Heard what?ö

Haruka mentally debated how to best condense the entire story. The full version would take a while to tell, and she still had to run her shop. ôWell, long story short, she made a move on Keitaro, but he turned her down.ö

ôYouÆre kidding!ö Now THAT was news! ôI canÆt believe she actually made a move! Good for her!ö A rush of pride swept through Hina. SheÆd told Kanako time and again to act on her love for Keitaro, since towards the end of oneÆs life, you didnÆt regret the things you did, but the things you didnÆt do. Her excitement was tempered by the fact that her adopted granddaughter had been rejected, howeveràher oniichan had been all the poor girl had spoken about for years. ôWhyÆd he reject her though?ö

ôWell, partially because he already liked Naru, but mostly it was because he couldnÆt stomach how he and she were brother and sister.ö

Hina frowned at that. HeÆd turned down a beautiful, intelligent, loving girl because of that? True heÆd been pursuing Narusegawa, but he should at least have given Kanako the consideration sheÆd deserved.

Hina shook her head. Living over eighty years may not have been enough to keep her from making stupid mistakes, but it had been enough to let her realize how idiotic people acted most of the time. Things like how society would judge you were far too often what dictated how people acted, instead of simply listening to their feelings or considering what made them happy, and it sounded to her like her grandson had rejected KanakoÆs love because of just that. It certainly couldnÆt have been just because of Narusegawa, considering how sheÆd reacted yesterday when Keitaro had accidentally put his face in her crotch û with an attitude like that, there was no way she was putting out, which meant that the relationship couldnÆt be so deep that heÆd reject another girl out of hand.

Ordering coffee from Haruka, Hina idly wondered if Kanako had given up. ItÆd be a shame if she had, since Keitaro was, in HinaÆs opinion, probably still on the market to a girl who was dedicated enough to fight for him. And heÆd definitely be a good catch too, being handsome, sweet, loyal, honest, and a Todai student. Hell, if he wasnÆt her own grandsonà

Having been served, Hina paused at that thought, the cup of coffee halfway to her mouth. Waitàso what if he was her own grandson? HadnÆt she just been thinking that it didnÆt matter what other people thought; that what made you happy was what was really important? And judging from the ôrelationship,ö if it could be called that, that Keitaro was in now, he couldnÆt be too happyànot as much as Hina knew she could make a guy, anyway. And besides, hadnÆt he said when he saw her that he couldnÆt believe that she was his grandmother? ThatÆd just make it even easier.

With a smile on her face and a flutter in her chest at what she was contemplating, Hina sipped her mug of warm caffeine. Things were about to become VERY interesting at Hinata Souà

Mighty Bob

Well-Known Member
Dear gods, what have we done?!

*keeps eyes peeled on CNN for news of four guys on horses running amok*

Squickyness aside, nice start. Poor Kanako-chan though.


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Awesome, I do not squick, period, ever, thus the only I have to say about this is pure awesomeness, and that I hope that you will continue this, in spite of the inevitable resistance you will receive. Carry on my wayward son.


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Interesting start...not quite the way I envisioned it, but then again, I can't really complain since I was the one who did not post any guidelines and Alzrius's attempt is actually quite commendable.

And I can't really claim credit for this one, it was originally an idea from another person at the BZ forums, I am just helping to propagate the idea. Then I remembered what this place is (in)famous for... :lol:

The original idea was that Keitaro somehow got sent back in time to when Hina was just a teenager, and they end up falling in love with each other, and the rest is history. They will end up giving birth to Keitaro's parents, who then give birth to Keitaro, who then gets sent back in time again, and the cycle goes on...

The idea of the hot spring of life never occured to me, but it is quite a viable concept itself... B)


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runestar said:
The original idea was that Keitaro somehow got sent back in time to when Hina was just a teenager, and they end up falling in love with each other, and the rest is history. They will end up giving birth to Keitaro's parents, who then give birth to Keitaro, who then gets sent back in time again, and the cycle goes on...
reminds me of that Futurama bit where Fry is his own grandfather :p

aaanyway.... YES! Miss Hina is gonna show the Hina girls how it's done!
Wonder if she'll secretly been giving Motoko info for her books XD

Edit: oops, my bad! ^^;
Great Job Alzurius
The above was written by Alzrius, Ceres.


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Why? Why can no one ever spell my name correctly? :sweat:

EDIT: That's better. :p
I have no idea what you're talking about.


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What's a world without a monster in it?

Come on, that's incredibly boring.
Okay, this is interesting... whoever came up with the whole concept... what are you smoking? Share!

Good start Alzrius :snigger:


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what are you smoking? Share!
I don't smoke. :p
This is merely a glimpse of what extended exposure to this board will do to you in the long run. You were warned... ;)