A merry, merry Xmas and a happy new year from Meinos Kaen
1/4
ôHmm, nothing on the newspaper. Again.ö It wasnÆt a nothing nothing, but a nothing exciting nothing. Naruto sighed, putting down the mass of paper and print, inclining his head back on the headrest of his couch, staring at the snow falling outside. ôSometimes I almost regret bringing peace to the world.ö He allowed himself a chuckle at the thought.
Of course he didnÆt regret it. After such a bloody war and so many friends lost, he didnÆt wish for anything but. Although, he had to admit that it was boring. He had always thought that becoming Hokage would be about protecting his home from all enemies, but there were no more enemies when he took the position and all that was left was to manage, lead and make decisions. At all. He was all for taking responsibility, but making decisions for an entire village of people? Not a role he was comfortable with. He wasnÆt perfect, he could end up making a wrong call, and he couldnÆt bear making a wrong call for his whole home and country.
He grinned, remembering everyoneÆs faces when he announced his first proposal as Hokage, right the day of his installation. He had made sure there were Kage Bunshin everywhere to take pictures. ôDaaaaaaaad!ö His head shot up at the familiar voice. A blur of colors suddenly slammed into him and sent both couch and ninja sprawling to the ground, the attacker now sitting on his stomach.
Ignoring the logical impossibility of a new genin -that was the reason of the joyous outburst, he bet- sneaking up on and sucker-glomping a kage-level ninja to the ground, he focused on exactly who in MidoriÆs family had added the random super-strength gene. ôLook at my forehead! Lookatitlookatitlookatit!ö
ôHard not to! YouÆre in my face, Chinami!ö The hyperactive girl leaned back, raising both hands and pointing at the proudly worn forehead protector with her index fingers. ôWell, congratulations on graduating!ö
?ôThaaaanks! Now, your turn! You promised!ö The blonde girl leaned forward again, pigtails swinging as she moved in her fatherÆs face again. ôYou have to marry me!ö
ôChinami, when in ramen did I ever promise you that?ö He rolled his eyes. He had heard of Hashimoto complexes -so named after the original discoverer of the syndrome, since in their world no ancient mythology centered about pretty selfish and messed up gods ever existed and as such never produced the tale of incest of a man named Oeplapitus or something- but this was ridiculous. Chinami was as proactive about the issue as he was- æOkay. This may be punishment for my earliest romantic pursuits.Æ
ôEeeeh?! But I still remember it! You were wearing your Hokage robes-So cool, daddy! So cool!-and I failed my latest sneak marriage proposal and you were all like æNo way!Æ and I was like æPleeeeease!Æ and you were like æNo!Æ and I was like æPretty pleeeeease!Æ and you were like æNo!Æ and I was like æWith ramen on top!Æ and you were like æIf you pass your genin exam at the top of your class!Æ and I did! So, I was thinking May?ö
ôChinami, all that I promised was to tell you that story when you passed.ö The girl pouted and he already saw the hint of that stare. ôChinami, youÆre six years too young for that to work on me. YouÆre nowhere near your motherÆs level yet.ö She stopped cold and just kept her pout. Naruto was finally allowed to sit and with a grin, he ruffled his eldest daughterÆs hair. ôStill, congratulations on passing with such high marks.ö
ôHehehehe...ö She quickly mellowed, grinning like a cat as the adult ninja ruffled her hair. ôOkay! Business, now! WeÆll discuss marriage later!ö
ôMore like never.ö
ôLater! Now, I want to know! YouÆve been dangling that story in front of my eyes for years!ö Her eyes sparkled as she held her hands in front of her mouth, balled into excitedly shaking fists. ôPlease, tell me daddy!ö He chuckled and sighed. She was legally an adult, so he guessed he could tell her one of the most well kept secret in the world.
He grabbed her with both arms and stood up. With a kick, he straightened the couch again and sat on it, settling the little twelve years old girl on his right leg. He knew she was maybe a bit too old now -and considering her situation the gesture was maybe not ideal- but, the hell with it. Uzumaki Naruto loved being a father and all the fatherly gestures that came with the job, and he would squeeze it for everything it was worth. ôAlright. I guess that, as a proud genin of Konoha and a member of the Uzumaki family, youÆve earned the right to know.ö She gasped and almost squealed. Chinami couldnÆt believe she really was going to know how it really happened! ôIÆm going to tell you how Christmas was born.ö
A Meinos Kaen Production
A sort of Naruto Christmas fanfiction inspired by risquÚ imagery
The Very. Next. Day. I give you my freaking-Screw this.
IÆll wait for that special someone.
-Thirteen years before-
ôHmm, maybe this one is too forward?ö
ôMom, he has seen you naked, for hellÆs sake. I doubt you can be more forward than that.ö Sakura sighed, fighting the perma-blush resting on her cheeks ever since her mother had started trying set after set of adult underwear in front of her, in the security of her own bedroom. To no avail. Also, her last comment had earned her a look of pure pity from the older pink haired woman. ôW-Why are you looking at me like that?!ö
ôSo gifted, my sweet girl. And yet you know so little...ö Midori shook her head, earning a suffocated snarl from her daughter. She started removing the lace the black silk garter, her mind not made up. ôThereÆs a reason why underwear is part of a womanÆs weaponry. And I must find a super-effective weapon!ö
ô... Mom, letÆs cut the crap, alright?ö Sakura stood up, hands crossed, the sight of her motherÆs gigantic mammaries not deterring her rage or fueling her sense of inferiority. No, sir. They had been trying silk, lace, garters, panties, bras and edible latex -the Akimichi had been getting rich on that latest invention- for two hours. She was tired, embarrassed and she sorely needed a fag. ôWhatÆs the problem?ö
Midori stopped, her usually cheerful face settling into sadness as she focused on something near her feet. She sighed, sitting on the nearby bed among a sea of undergarments. She was fought about opening up to Sakura. She was the other, she was supposed to be the one the daughter could rely on. But for once, she decided to be weak. ôSakura, have I become unattractive?ö
ôHuh, fuck no?ö She bit on her lower lip. She really was rubbing off on her. ôI mean, no, mom. YouÆre one of the most attractive women I know.ö She sighed, sitting beside the woman, taking care not to lay on anything. ôWhat brought this on?ö
ô... IÆm getting old, Sakura.ö Midori declared, pouting and grabbing at her breasts, much to SakuraÆs embarassment. ôThese are not as firm as they used to be. My skin is not as peachy. My vu-ö
ôMom, you and Naruto still get complaints from neighbors!ö Sakura hid her face in her hands, blushing up to her ears. She may have become used to sex and all things entailed to it, but imagining her mother doing the horizontal mambo with one of her oldest friends -also known as their freaking Hokage- was still something that she didnÆt do comfortably. But at least it stopped her mother from describing her inner strength exercises. A second time. ôYou canÆt tell me that youÆre worried he doesnÆt find you attractive anymore!ö
ôIÆm sure heÆll change his mind. After all, weÆre going to spend two weeks in each otherÆs company. 24/7.ö Midori countered, sniffling a little as she joined her hands in her lap. Damn vacation time. ôHe will have all the time in the world to see how much of a hag IÆm becoming.ö
ôFor f-Mom, this is ridiculous. Okay, so youÆre forty. Big deal! Everyone grows old!ö Midori turned to her daughter with a raised eyebrow. ô... Okay. Not everyone everyone. Most people. But you already knew this when you first started dating Naruto!ö
ôI know. A-And I thought I wouldnÆt mind. I was prepared to accept it. But...ö Midori returned her gaze to her lap and sniffed again, gripping at her bra with both hands. ôSakura, you have no idea. You have no idea how frustrating it is. To be past your prime while the man you love has just started perfecting himself. To grow less beautiful while he grows more handsome.ö Then, she gritted her teeth and the sound of stressed fabric started to echo in the room as she manhandled her underwear. ôTo see all those little harlots wave, and flirt, and flash...ö
ôWoah, there. Someone actually flashed Naruto?ö Sakura asked, shocked at the piece of information. She knew he had been getting more popular, but-Silk started ripping. æWrong question, Sakura.Æ Mother and daughter werenÆt that different, it seemed. ôS-So what? I mean, I know Naruto maybe better than anyone. Believe me, mom. HeÆs still as head over heels for you as he was three years ago.ö
ô... I know.ö Midori let out, slowly relaxing. But sorrow soon set in again. ôI know heÆs a sweetheart, that he loves me from the bottom of his heart, that heÆll stay by my side even when I start to wither and die like a diseased dahlia...ö
ôM-Mom, thatÆs pretty macabre...ö
ôBut, I started wondering, is this right? To tie him up to an old woman like me?ö Midori continued, her head dropping inch by inch. ôMaybe I should just let him go. Let him find a girl his own age.ö
ôAnd break both of your hearts in the process. Great plan, mom.ö Sakura admonished her mother by slapping the back of her head, finishing the slumping process. Midori was now completely hunched forward, grabbing at her toes. The younger woman groaned. She really needed to smoke. ôI canÆt believe I had to deal with this twice, this year.ö
ôTwice?ö Midori inquired, earning an unseen nod from her daughter, since she was still staring at the floor.
ôRemember when me and Tayuya had that huge fight two months ago? Same thing. Only, it wasnÆt because of age. It was because of her scars.ö SakuraÆs eyes softened as she remembered her girlfriendÆs face, filled with tears as she showed her weakness and insecurity. Her once beautiful body, ruined by huge scars that would never heal. Unless Sakura had something to say about it. And she would. Of course, they were probably going to have another fight about it, but... For her.
ô... How did you solve it?ö Sakura blushed. It was, without a doubt, the most perverted and strange thing she had ever done in her whole life. She had chocolate in places where nothing is supposed to go.
ôI-ItÆs not important. It wouldnÆt work in your case.ö æNaruto isnÆt as big a fan of chocolate, after all.Æ ôListen, mom, thereÆs no easy solution to this. Aging canÆt be stopped and yes, youÆre going to get older before Naruto. You have no choice but to accept that.ö That wasnÆt what Midori wanted to hear. At all. ôAnd you have to talk to Naruto about this. HeÆs the one good at pep talks.ö
ô... Right.ö The older woman sighed. Talking to Naruto and appearing weak and insecure on top of ugly was the last thing she wanted to do, at the moment.
-Present-
ôUhm, dad?ö
ôYes, sweetheart?ö He interrupted his story-telling. Chinami was still sitting in his lap, her cheeks now flushed.
ôW-Why are you telling me this?ö
ôWell, itÆs a bit of background needed to understand the rest of the story.ö He explained and then grinned mischievously. ôEmbarrassing? I thought you were an adult, now.ö
ôO-Of course I am! I-I covered all that stuff at the academy!ö Chinami crossed her arms, huffing. ôSomething like that is n-nothing! Keep going, daddy!ö
ôAlright.ö He nodded, enjoying her evident discomfort at hearing something private about her mother and dear auntie Sakura. ôSo, in the meanwhile, I was...ö
1/4
ôHmm, nothing on the newspaper. Again.ö It wasnÆt a nothing nothing, but a nothing exciting nothing. Naruto sighed, putting down the mass of paper and print, inclining his head back on the headrest of his couch, staring at the snow falling outside. ôSometimes I almost regret bringing peace to the world.ö He allowed himself a chuckle at the thought.
Of course he didnÆt regret it. After such a bloody war and so many friends lost, he didnÆt wish for anything but. Although, he had to admit that it was boring. He had always thought that becoming Hokage would be about protecting his home from all enemies, but there were no more enemies when he took the position and all that was left was to manage, lead and make decisions. At all. He was all for taking responsibility, but making decisions for an entire village of people? Not a role he was comfortable with. He wasnÆt perfect, he could end up making a wrong call, and he couldnÆt bear making a wrong call for his whole home and country.
He grinned, remembering everyoneÆs faces when he announced his first proposal as Hokage, right the day of his installation. He had made sure there were Kage Bunshin everywhere to take pictures. ôDaaaaaaaad!ö His head shot up at the familiar voice. A blur of colors suddenly slammed into him and sent both couch and ninja sprawling to the ground, the attacker now sitting on his stomach.
Ignoring the logical impossibility of a new genin -that was the reason of the joyous outburst, he bet- sneaking up on and sucker-glomping a kage-level ninja to the ground, he focused on exactly who in MidoriÆs family had added the random super-strength gene. ôLook at my forehead! Lookatitlookatitlookatit!ö
ôHard not to! YouÆre in my face, Chinami!ö The hyperactive girl leaned back, raising both hands and pointing at the proudly worn forehead protector with her index fingers. ôWell, congratulations on graduating!ö
?ôThaaaanks! Now, your turn! You promised!ö The blonde girl leaned forward again, pigtails swinging as she moved in her fatherÆs face again. ôYou have to marry me!ö
ôChinami, when in ramen did I ever promise you that?ö He rolled his eyes. He had heard of Hashimoto complexes -so named after the original discoverer of the syndrome, since in their world no ancient mythology centered about pretty selfish and messed up gods ever existed and as such never produced the tale of incest of a man named Oeplapitus or something- but this was ridiculous. Chinami was as proactive about the issue as he was- æOkay. This may be punishment for my earliest romantic pursuits.Æ
ôEeeeh?! But I still remember it! You were wearing your Hokage robes-So cool, daddy! So cool!-and I failed my latest sneak marriage proposal and you were all like æNo way!Æ and I was like æPleeeeease!Æ and you were like æNo!Æ and I was like æPretty pleeeeease!Æ and you were like æNo!Æ and I was like æWith ramen on top!Æ and you were like æIf you pass your genin exam at the top of your class!Æ and I did! So, I was thinking May?ö
ôChinami, all that I promised was to tell you that story when you passed.ö The girl pouted and he already saw the hint of that stare. ôChinami, youÆre six years too young for that to work on me. YouÆre nowhere near your motherÆs level yet.ö She stopped cold and just kept her pout. Naruto was finally allowed to sit and with a grin, he ruffled his eldest daughterÆs hair. ôStill, congratulations on passing with such high marks.ö
ôHehehehe...ö She quickly mellowed, grinning like a cat as the adult ninja ruffled her hair. ôOkay! Business, now! WeÆll discuss marriage later!ö
ôMore like never.ö
ôLater! Now, I want to know! YouÆve been dangling that story in front of my eyes for years!ö Her eyes sparkled as she held her hands in front of her mouth, balled into excitedly shaking fists. ôPlease, tell me daddy!ö He chuckled and sighed. She was legally an adult, so he guessed he could tell her one of the most well kept secret in the world.
He grabbed her with both arms and stood up. With a kick, he straightened the couch again and sat on it, settling the little twelve years old girl on his right leg. He knew she was maybe a bit too old now -and considering her situation the gesture was maybe not ideal- but, the hell with it. Uzumaki Naruto loved being a father and all the fatherly gestures that came with the job, and he would squeeze it for everything it was worth. ôAlright. I guess that, as a proud genin of Konoha and a member of the Uzumaki family, youÆve earned the right to know.ö She gasped and almost squealed. Chinami couldnÆt believe she really was going to know how it really happened! ôIÆm going to tell you how Christmas was born.ö
A Meinos Kaen Production
A sort of Naruto Christmas fanfiction inspired by risquÚ imagery
The Very. Next. Day. I give you my freaking-Screw this.
IÆll wait for that special someone.
-Thirteen years before-
ôHmm, maybe this one is too forward?ö
ôMom, he has seen you naked, for hellÆs sake. I doubt you can be more forward than that.ö Sakura sighed, fighting the perma-blush resting on her cheeks ever since her mother had started trying set after set of adult underwear in front of her, in the security of her own bedroom. To no avail. Also, her last comment had earned her a look of pure pity from the older pink haired woman. ôW-Why are you looking at me like that?!ö
ôSo gifted, my sweet girl. And yet you know so little...ö Midori shook her head, earning a suffocated snarl from her daughter. She started removing the lace the black silk garter, her mind not made up. ôThereÆs a reason why underwear is part of a womanÆs weaponry. And I must find a super-effective weapon!ö
ô... Mom, letÆs cut the crap, alright?ö Sakura stood up, hands crossed, the sight of her motherÆs gigantic mammaries not deterring her rage or fueling her sense of inferiority. No, sir. They had been trying silk, lace, garters, panties, bras and edible latex -the Akimichi had been getting rich on that latest invention- for two hours. She was tired, embarrassed and she sorely needed a fag. ôWhatÆs the problem?ö
Midori stopped, her usually cheerful face settling into sadness as she focused on something near her feet. She sighed, sitting on the nearby bed among a sea of undergarments. She was fought about opening up to Sakura. She was the other, she was supposed to be the one the daughter could rely on. But for once, she decided to be weak. ôSakura, have I become unattractive?ö
ôHuh, fuck no?ö She bit on her lower lip. She really was rubbing off on her. ôI mean, no, mom. YouÆre one of the most attractive women I know.ö She sighed, sitting beside the woman, taking care not to lay on anything. ôWhat brought this on?ö
ô... IÆm getting old, Sakura.ö Midori declared, pouting and grabbing at her breasts, much to SakuraÆs embarassment. ôThese are not as firm as they used to be. My skin is not as peachy. My vu-ö
ôMom, you and Naruto still get complaints from neighbors!ö Sakura hid her face in her hands, blushing up to her ears. She may have become used to sex and all things entailed to it, but imagining her mother doing the horizontal mambo with one of her oldest friends -also known as their freaking Hokage- was still something that she didnÆt do comfortably. But at least it stopped her mother from describing her inner strength exercises. A second time. ôYou canÆt tell me that youÆre worried he doesnÆt find you attractive anymore!ö
ôIÆm sure heÆll change his mind. After all, weÆre going to spend two weeks in each otherÆs company. 24/7.ö Midori countered, sniffling a little as she joined her hands in her lap. Damn vacation time. ôHe will have all the time in the world to see how much of a hag IÆm becoming.ö
ôFor f-Mom, this is ridiculous. Okay, so youÆre forty. Big deal! Everyone grows old!ö Midori turned to her daughter with a raised eyebrow. ô... Okay. Not everyone everyone. Most people. But you already knew this when you first started dating Naruto!ö
ôI know. A-And I thought I wouldnÆt mind. I was prepared to accept it. But...ö Midori returned her gaze to her lap and sniffed again, gripping at her bra with both hands. ôSakura, you have no idea. You have no idea how frustrating it is. To be past your prime while the man you love has just started perfecting himself. To grow less beautiful while he grows more handsome.ö Then, she gritted her teeth and the sound of stressed fabric started to echo in the room as she manhandled her underwear. ôTo see all those little harlots wave, and flirt, and flash...ö
ôWoah, there. Someone actually flashed Naruto?ö Sakura asked, shocked at the piece of information. She knew he had been getting more popular, but-Silk started ripping. æWrong question, Sakura.Æ Mother and daughter werenÆt that different, it seemed. ôS-So what? I mean, I know Naruto maybe better than anyone. Believe me, mom. HeÆs still as head over heels for you as he was three years ago.ö
ô... I know.ö Midori let out, slowly relaxing. But sorrow soon set in again. ôI know heÆs a sweetheart, that he loves me from the bottom of his heart, that heÆll stay by my side even when I start to wither and die like a diseased dahlia...ö
ôM-Mom, thatÆs pretty macabre...ö
ôBut, I started wondering, is this right? To tie him up to an old woman like me?ö Midori continued, her head dropping inch by inch. ôMaybe I should just let him go. Let him find a girl his own age.ö
ôAnd break both of your hearts in the process. Great plan, mom.ö Sakura admonished her mother by slapping the back of her head, finishing the slumping process. Midori was now completely hunched forward, grabbing at her toes. The younger woman groaned. She really needed to smoke. ôI canÆt believe I had to deal with this twice, this year.ö
ôTwice?ö Midori inquired, earning an unseen nod from her daughter, since she was still staring at the floor.
ôRemember when me and Tayuya had that huge fight two months ago? Same thing. Only, it wasnÆt because of age. It was because of her scars.ö SakuraÆs eyes softened as she remembered her girlfriendÆs face, filled with tears as she showed her weakness and insecurity. Her once beautiful body, ruined by huge scars that would never heal. Unless Sakura had something to say about it. And she would. Of course, they were probably going to have another fight about it, but... For her.
ô... How did you solve it?ö Sakura blushed. It was, without a doubt, the most perverted and strange thing she had ever done in her whole life. She had chocolate in places where nothing is supposed to go.
ôI-ItÆs not important. It wouldnÆt work in your case.ö æNaruto isnÆt as big a fan of chocolate, after all.Æ ôListen, mom, thereÆs no easy solution to this. Aging canÆt be stopped and yes, youÆre going to get older before Naruto. You have no choice but to accept that.ö That wasnÆt what Midori wanted to hear. At all. ôAnd you have to talk to Naruto about this. HeÆs the one good at pep talks.ö
ô... Right.ö The older woman sighed. Talking to Naruto and appearing weak and insecure on top of ugly was the last thing she wanted to do, at the moment.
-Present-
ôUhm, dad?ö
ôYes, sweetheart?ö He interrupted his story-telling. Chinami was still sitting in his lap, her cheeks now flushed.
ôW-Why are you telling me this?ö
ôWell, itÆs a bit of background needed to understand the rest of the story.ö He explained and then grinned mischievously. ôEmbarrassing? I thought you were an adult, now.ö
ôO-Of course I am! I-I covered all that stuff at the academy!ö Chinami crossed her arms, huffing. ôSomething like that is n-nothing! Keep going, daddy!ö
ôAlright.ö He nodded, enjoying her evident discomfort at hearing something private about her mother and dear auntie Sakura. ôSo, in the meanwhile, I was...ö
