You are a motherfucking WIZARD.
Roll a D10.
1: Gnome.
Bull shit levels of skill with machines. You're so good at piloting, you pull stunts that are physically impossible. Cars sit up and beg at your mildest caress, and you are fully capable of using a motorcycle as a melee weapon while riding it.
2: Pyromancer.
Fire Magic. Not exactly exotic, but there's something awesome to be said about being able to throw around fireballs and manipulate fire in any way you can imagine, while also being immune to the effects of both the heat and lack of oxygen that would kill any normal human.
3: Spiritual Surgeon.
You ever heard of that guy who could perform surgery on people's souls to do all kinds of ludicrous bull shit to their bodies? Make super models out of fat chicks, musclemen out of skinny nerds, and even alter memories and personality traits? Well, now you are that guy.
4: Ocean King.
Poseidon has nothing on you. The creatures of the sea all bow to you, the currents and tides bend to your whims, as do the mighty storms that can only form on the open waters of your domain. Also, you can manipulate water.
5: Nanoha.
You are now Nanoha, complete with Raising Heart. You don't have any limiters. No, the boobs are not optional. Have fun.
6: Charismaster.
You can talk people into anything. Other WIZARDS are immune of course, and you have to be able to talk to people face to face in order for it to work. But you can convince people of anything, and they'll believe it to the point where if you say the sky is green, their minds will only see green when they look up.
7: Cyber Ghost.
The Computer WIZARD. Bull shit hacking, basically. If it's connected to the internet, in some way, shape, or form, you can fuck with it however you please. You can make AIs, write any kind of program you can think of, and control computers with nothing but your brain meats.
8: Runologist.
Magical Runes that do magical things. Results range from explosions, dislocating local reality, reinforcing materials, conjuring lightning, planet cracking- the uses are endless! It's such a shame that the more complex/bullshit whatever you're attempting is, the more runes it needs.
9: Wielder of the Mystic Eyes of Death Perception.
You can cut anything. Anything.
10: Spark.
A Spark.
Q: What the fuck.
This is a fun little game, where you make a roll of the dice and become a motherfucking WIZARD. Try to take over the world, try to save it, fight with each other, become millionaires...
Just do something interesting with those powers.
Q: This looks highly imbalanced and broken.
Yes, it is. Can't say I care.
Q: ... What's the catch?
I'm not really going to be serious about this game. Don't expect sweeping epics, deep storylines, or much effort. Also, Hard Mode and PVP are enabled.
In exchange, I'm not going to be very serious about this at all. So, power levels are cranked way the fuck up. Even Gnomes, the 'weakest' class, are capable of absolutely absurd bull shit. Street racing in a Ford Model T against modern cars, and winning, kind of bull shit.
One more catch, though.
After three years IC, the Black Beast will show up. Not even a person with Mystic Eyes can kill this thing head on. It can also shrug off nukes.
Have fun with that.
1095 Days Remaining until the Black Beast arrives.
Roll a D10.
1: Gnome.
Bull shit levels of skill with machines. You're so good at piloting, you pull stunts that are physically impossible. Cars sit up and beg at your mildest caress, and you are fully capable of using a motorcycle as a melee weapon while riding it.
2: Pyromancer.
Fire Magic. Not exactly exotic, but there's something awesome to be said about being able to throw around fireballs and manipulate fire in any way you can imagine, while also being immune to the effects of both the heat and lack of oxygen that would kill any normal human.
3: Spiritual Surgeon.
You ever heard of that guy who could perform surgery on people's souls to do all kinds of ludicrous bull shit to their bodies? Make super models out of fat chicks, musclemen out of skinny nerds, and even alter memories and personality traits? Well, now you are that guy.
4: Ocean King.
Poseidon has nothing on you. The creatures of the sea all bow to you, the currents and tides bend to your whims, as do the mighty storms that can only form on the open waters of your domain. Also, you can manipulate water.
5: Nanoha.
You are now Nanoha, complete with Raising Heart. You don't have any limiters. No, the boobs are not optional. Have fun.
6: Charismaster.
You can talk people into anything. Other WIZARDS are immune of course, and you have to be able to talk to people face to face in order for it to work. But you can convince people of anything, and they'll believe it to the point where if you say the sky is green, their minds will only see green when they look up.
7: Cyber Ghost.
The Computer WIZARD. Bull shit hacking, basically. If it's connected to the internet, in some way, shape, or form, you can fuck with it however you please. You can make AIs, write any kind of program you can think of, and control computers with nothing but your brain meats.
8: Runologist.
Magical Runes that do magical things. Results range from explosions, dislocating local reality, reinforcing materials, conjuring lightning, planet cracking- the uses are endless! It's such a shame that the more complex/bullshit whatever you're attempting is, the more runes it needs.
9: Wielder of the Mystic Eyes of Death Perception.
You can cut anything. Anything.
10: Spark.
A Spark.
Q: What the fuck.
This is a fun little game, where you make a roll of the dice and become a motherfucking WIZARD. Try to take over the world, try to save it, fight with each other, become millionaires...
Just do something interesting with those powers.
Q: This looks highly imbalanced and broken.
Yes, it is. Can't say I care.
Q: ... What's the catch?
I'm not really going to be serious about this game. Don't expect sweeping epics, deep storylines, or much effort. Also, Hard Mode and PVP are enabled.
In exchange, I'm not going to be very serious about this at all. So, power levels are cranked way the fuck up. Even Gnomes, the 'weakest' class, are capable of absolutely absurd bull shit. Street racing in a Ford Model T against modern cars, and winning, kind of bull shit.
One more catch, though.
After three years IC, the Black Beast will show up. Not even a person with Mystic Eyes can kill this thing head on. It can also shrug off nukes.
Have fun with that.
1095 Days Remaining until the Black Beast arrives.