Akamatsuverse Negima: Sex Ed

[Prince Charon]

I got the idea from part four of A Day Indoors, a series of one-shots by Ambrant Arandel. I don't think he plans to follow up on it, so here's the thought -

Negi has to teach his class sex ed, either because the teacher who should have is 'unavailable' (as in the fic, above), or because its the homeroom teacher's job to do that.

Imagine how excited the girls will be! :evil:

This'll be even more trouble/fun if it happens in 'Mahou Inazuke Negima', but it should work well in a more canon 'verse, as well.

 

[runestar]

Why do I have a feeling it will actually be the other way round...?

I expect most of the class will be volunteering for this lesson? Wonder if some sort of test will be conducted... :snigger:

 

[Prince Charon]

Why do I have a feeling it will actually be the other way round...?

I expect most of the class will be volunteering for this lesson? Wonder if some sort of test will be conducted... :snigger:

I would think so. He has to make sure they've learned their lessons, after all. :snigger:

 

[Alzrius]

Negi has to teach his class sex ed, either because the teacher who should have is 'unavailable' (as in the fic, above), or because its the homeroom teacher's job to do that.

Imagine how excited the girls will be! :evil:

This'll be even more trouble/fun if it happens in 'Mahou Inazuke Negima', but it should work well in a more canon 'verse, as well.

Hmm...now this is something to think about... :evil:

 

[GenocideHeart]

I can see Asuna and especially Chisame flipping out like nobody's business.

I can also see Sayo feeling left out and possessing one of the other girls just to see how it 'feels'.

Or, for added fun, she could possess Negi himself. Being a ghost does give a wide array of options for this kind of stuff. :snigger:

 

[Prince Charon]

I can see Asuna and especially Chisame flipping out like nobody's business.

I can also see Sayo feeling left out and possessing one of the other girls just to see how it 'feels'.

Or, for added fun, she could possess Negi himself. Being a ghost does give a wide array of options for this kind of stuff.? :snigger:

Well, in the fic that inspired this (its linked in the first post), possession is related to the way ghosts have sex. Have a look.

 

[Moshulel]

Negi has to teach his class sex ed, either because the teacher who should have is 'unavailable' (as in the fic, above), or because its the homeroom teacher's job to do that.

Am i the only one that thinks Negi will learn more from this experience than the girls will? He's younger than they are and not that experienced with the issues of puberty,might be a chance for some of the girls to take the initiative and try to help him learn what he is supposed to "teach". :snigger:

 

[Lumias]

This just put this scene in my head.

"So since Shizune has gone missing we will need a new canidate to teach you girls about sex education," The headmaster said, "Since most of the staff told me they would quit if i assigned them anything to teach that has anything to do with this class, I chose Takahata-sensei."

"Oh god yes," Asuna screamed.

"Or at least i would if he hadn't dissappeared along with Shizune," The headmaster finished.

'Disappered with...' Asuna thought as tears streamed down her face.

"So, the only other canidate is Negi-sensei."

crickets chirp

"WHAT!" Chisame screeched.

"Takahata and Shizune," Asuna mumbled ignoring the events around her.

"well have fun," the headmaster said before walking away.

"As Class Rep I feel it is my duty to go first and help Negi-Sensei in the correct instruction methods." Ayaka declared.

"No fair i should get to go first." Makie shouted.

"they do realize Negi isn't going to have sex with them right?" Ako asked.

"Well, this is class 3A and since Negi has been our teacher the class does seem to go overboard in learning," Asakura said.

"P-please calm down e-everyone." Negi stuttered.

"You're all fools if Negi is going to teach you sex ed someone who can teach it to him has to go first," Eva shouted, "Come Negi i will show you first."

"NO WAY." the class shouted.

"B-but eva-san." Negi mumbled.

"Don't you but me, and your forgetting something i'm getting ready to teach you so what do you call me?" Eva glared.

"Sorry master," Negi said.

"That's better. Come along Chachamaru," Eva grinned as she led Negi out of the room.

"Yes Mistress," Chachamaru said ecstatic that she had got the upgrade that made her fully anatomically correct after all.

"..." Class 3-A said.

111111111111111111111

sorry for shortly hijacking you're idea...

 

[runestar]

Wonder what form the final test will take... :snigger:

 

[lunaitc]

Wonder what form the final test will take... :snigger:

Would an oral evaluation joke be too obvious here?

 

[TheWickerMan]

Wonder what form the final test will take... :snigger:

Would an oral evaluation joke be too obvious here?

Yeah, but make it anyways. A cheap laugh is still a laugh. :rofl:

 

[Dark Knight Gafgar]

Wonder what form the final test will take... :snigger:

Would an oral evaluation joke be too obvious here?

Yeah, but make it anyways. A cheap laugh is still a laugh. :rofl:

/agree.

 

[Prince Charon]

Slightly inspired by Lumias's snippet, but with different assumptions.

"Ah, Master," said Negi, "I need your help with something, for class."

"Oh," replied Eva, "what is it, boya?'

"Well, you see, next week is time to teach sex-ed, and as home-room teacher, its my job, but I- I- I don't know what to do!" he exclaimed.

"Heh, heh, they want you to- hee hee- teach sex- BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!" she cackled.

What would Eva be likely to teach him, and how would this effect how he taught the class?

 

[GenocideHeart]

Dude, even I have enough common sense to not necro threads OVER A YEAR OLD. :no:

 

[holyknight]

Slightly inspired by Lumias's snippet, but with different assumptions.

"Ah, Master," said Negi, "I need your help with something, for class."

"Oh," replied Eva, "what is it, boya?'

"Well, you see, next week is time to teach sex-ed, and as home-room teacher, its my job, but I- I- I don't know what to do!" he exclaimed.

"Heh, heh, they want you to- hee hee- teach sex- BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!" she cackled.

What would Eva be likely to teach him, and how would this effect how he taught the class?

 

[Euphemism]

Post fails to be inane. Thread Necromancer's ability fizzles.

And to be on topic, I find this idea hilarious. But not too original.

 

[Prince Charon]

Firstly, its my own thread. I didn't see the point of creating a new one. Second, as Euphemism pointed out, the post is not inane, and contributes to the discussion. Third, its an Idea thread, not a Preview thread, so its not like you thought that a story had finally been updated, which is the only good reason I can think of to find thread necromancy annoying.

On topic, what would, or could, Eva teach Negi? She died when she was ten, and while its not unreasonable that she could have learned a great deal about sex in the past few centuries, its also possible that she learned little or nothing, which means she would have to either look it up, ask someone else (not bloody likely), give him a useless and/or misleading lesson, or refuse to teach him. OTOH, of she did know something about it, how much would she know, and how would she teach him? If she's the sort to go for hands on instruction, and Negi thinks he has to teach them the same way... :evil2: (of course, most of the girls in that class would probably go along with it, with varying degrees of enthusiasm).

Who else might he ask, I wonder? Takata or Shizuna, if they had time, would certainly give him useful answers, but might not be all that amusing. He might ask Paru, though, and her answers could be very amusing, given what a pervert she is (have a look at alpha-zulu's fic in the Negima Lemon section for examples).

What if he asked Chisame, though? She's certainly had the opportunity to learn a lot about sex, intellectually speaking. Her exasperation about this latest bit of insanity holds a fair bit of amusement value, as well.

 

[knight_of_ni]

Eva seems to have at least a limited amount of knowledge about sex, given the way she acts, and her attempted seductions of Nagi. However, her not knowing that much about it would be much more amusing, the best way to explain her actions would be that she is either a closet romance (with smut) book fan (given the library she has, and her way of fixating on Nagi, I could see this), or just a reader of plain smut (also believable, considering the fact that her "seductions" were very blunt).

Chisame, well, she would probably complain about it, but she would help. Though, that fic would only be good for a one shot as the only interesting bit (outside of the acutal lessons) would be him trying to get her to help him.

Paru, I am not going to even touch.

 

[Prince Charon]

Y'know, there's something else I should have thought of: the rumour mill. Most of those girls are incorrigible gossips (and, to varying degrees, perverts). Imagine what happens if one of them overhears something. They know Sex Ed time is approaching, they know that the homeroom teacher is supposed to teach it, and now Negi is asking this girl or that girl for help. If they think he asked Paru or Iincho, then whether he did or not, there'll be a mad scramble to protect poor, innocent Negi-sensei from the scary pervert, no?

That could even spice up one where he asks Chisame for help.

I do wonder though, what would happen if he asked Asuna and/or Konoka?

 

[Xaosite]

I don't think he'd ever actually ask Asuna. He might consider it, but then he'd remember: Pain = BAD!

If he asked Konoka though? "Sure thing Negi! Se-chan, come over here! You get to help me teach Negi about sex! Hey, why did you fall over, and why is your nose bleeding?"

 

[Zenithos]

I had such an idea for my Mahou Sensei Evangeline fic (a fic where Eva was dumped at Negi's doorstep in Ireland with her memories erased instead of being bound to Mahora Academy and ending up being raised as part of the family. The two end up teaching together at Mahora later on.). The idea involved Eva and Negi suddenly being told they had to teach sex ed just a day before and the two ended up studying the course material overnight. The thing is, they two don't even know what sex ed involves so they try to pick up anything even remotely sex related. Cute and funny hinjinks ensue. :snigger: :rofl:

"What on earth are we supposed to teach them anyway?!" Eva shouted in frustration as she frantically flipped through yet another biology book.

"Eva-chan! Eva-chan! I found a promising book!" Negi cried excitedly.

"Really?" Eva sighed a sigh of relief. Negi's intuition when it came to books was impeccable. However, she couldn't help but raise a skeptical eyebrow at the title. "...the...kama sutra...?"

"...it's foreign..." Negi conceded. "...wouldn't that mean they're a really good authority on the subject to publish it internationally?"

"You have a good point." Eva nodded. "Ok then, let's see if there's any teaching material in this thing."

 

[Lumias]

I think that could work just as well with Anya, though she wouldn't have the connection with Nagi.

Still the idea could cause many problems with either character.

Ayaka and Makie would have a contest on who gets to be taught by Negi first only for Nodoka to accidentally win instead.

 

[Lord Raine]

Dude, even I have enough common sense to not necro threads OVER A YEAR OLD. :no:

Fail. It's his thread and his idea. If he want's to bring it back as a valid topic, that's his decision, not yours.

That being said, hilarious. I think Chachamaru would be top of the class in this. After all, she does have built-in internet access, which means she can tap all porn everywhere.

 

[Prince Charon]

Dude, even I have enough common sense to not necro threads OVER A YEAR OLD. :no:

Fail. It's his thread and his idea. If he want's to bring it back as a valid topic, that's his decision, not yours.

That being said, hilarious. I think Chachamaru would be top of the class in this. After all, she does have built-in internet access, which means she can tap all porn everywhere.

Disturbing thought: Negi asks Chachamaru for help. Chachamaru's main sources for knowledge of sex are 2chan, 4chan, and alt.sex.stories.

 

[Himitsu the Hunter]

Dude, even I have enough common sense to not necro threads OVER A YEAR OLD. :no:

Fail. It's his thread and his idea. If he want's to bring it back as a valid topic, that's his decision, not yours.

That being said, hilarious. I think Chachamaru would be top of the class in this. After all, she does have built-in internet access, which means she can tap all porn everywhere.

Disturbing thought: Negi asks Chachamaru for help. Chachamaru's main sources for knowledge of sex are 2chan, 4chan, and alt.sex.stories.

This thought... it makes me eyeball twitch....

Is there nothing sacred?......... I guess not.