Evangelion/Haruhi? Sure. Just not how youÆd expect it.
---------------
Asuka Langley Sorhyu was pissed.
No, she reflected as she stared in the immobile surface of the tea (yech!) cooling before her eyes, she wasnÆt just pissed. She was well past pissed and on her way to true anger. Everything about Japan, or so it had seemed for the entire time sheÆd been here (a full week already!), existed for the sole purpose of annoying her.
Katsuragi MisatoÆs apartment was tiny; back home in Germany, sheÆd had a real house, a full five room building in which sheÆd lived practically alone, except for the annoyingly frequent times that annoying lady who dated her dad came over, or when Kaji-san found enough time to give her a visit. Her room had been large enough that containing her bed and her every worldly possession had not made it any difficult to cross it.
Here, she lived in a tiny four room apartment, with 2 other people and a pet; her room was barely big enough for that mattress those uneducated Japanese seemed to believe replaced a proper sleeping surface, and for barely half of what sheÆd brought over. SheÆd thought her living arrangements would befit an important person such as her, but no! Apparently not! Apparently, they decided that she, genius and college graduate at fourteen, she, one of the only three people in the world capable of piloting the Evangelion and saving the world, was worth nothing more than this hole in the wall!
It had to be because of the other pilots, sheÆd already decided. Wallflowers didnÆt begin to describe them. It seemed neither of them understood just how important they were, just how much they (and therefore she) deserved. But then, this didnÆt surprise her. The Third Child, Ikari Shinji, the supposed prodigy who went out, fought and defeated an angel on his first time in an Eva, was barely worth the socks he walked in. When he breathed in, the molecules of air probably asked permission to flow into his bloodstream, and when he breathed out, it was with an apology.
As for the other, she wasà
She wasà
àshe was the main source of AsukaÆs current ire.
---------------
Middle school sucked.
It especially sucked the second time around.
It sucked even more when your teacher seemed to have nothing to talk about than the Second Impact, the troubles around it and how grateful modern youth should be for the Herculean efforts of their parents to put everything back on track.
And it reached the epitome of sucking when she couldnÆt even log on the net for something, anything to distract her mind, because one of the hormonal idiots in the class, smitten by her beauty, would inevitably try to send her an IM in a transparent attempt to ask her out. And none of them had had the balls to actually ask so far! What kind of country was this, and what kind of ball-less men did it make? It was insulting!
It was too bad there seemed to be no one in this class she could chat to (except Hikari Horaki, but the class president simply couldnÆt be caught chatting in class). The other girls were all vapid faceless drones, intimidated and brought to shameful silence by her greatness. The only other candidate was the First Child, Ayanami Rei, but trying to talk to her, it seemed, was less productive than trying to strike up a conversation with drying paint.
ôàand on October 19th, when the dam finally broke, there was no one left in the village, thanks to a warning transmitted through the defended telephone linesàö
Well, whoop-dee-doo for them. Screw it, she couldnÆt continue this. With a sigh of resignation, she turned on her computer and logged on. She counted the seconds it took for someone to talk to herà
1.
2.
3.
4ùblip. Message.
She blinked. That was fast, even for them. Especially for them. She was just that irresistible, apparently.
She ignored the ôCallö icon with a disdainful sniff.
Blip. The icon started blinking. Another message had appeared in it.
Blip. And another.
She tried to continue ignoring it, but the little flash ended up burning through her patience. She clicked on it.
: After school, 17:30
: Bench near the western stairs
: IÆll be waiting
She blinked, then re-read the message. Then she blinked again. She furtively looked around the class, to see who had been the one to so bravùso callously summon Her like this. There was no one.
She sniffed in disdain and wiped the message away. As if! That perverted boy probably wouldnÆt show up. Why, she was certain! She knew it! No one in this country had any balls to speak of, so why should this one be any different? A real man would have caught her after class, maybe tried to talk her into paying her a drink or something, not an unromantic message like that.
Na. Whoever had written this was ballsier than the rest of the country, but still not enough for her.
So she ignored it, and at 17:30 that day, she was watching television with Pen-pen lying on her lap like a big pillow.
But the next dayà
Blip. Blip, Blip.
: After school, 17:30
: Bench near the western stairs
: IÆll be waiting
The same message. Hmph! No originality, either.
But if this was going to become a habit, then sheÆd go. SheÆd go and tell him exactly why he shouldnÆt be bothering Asuka Langley with his half-balls!
So, that day at 17:25, she was walking over to the bench near the western stairs with a confident, angry stride, mentally reciting everything sheÆd tell to that perverted, no-good boy.
Then she reached the bench and the person sitting on it, and her mind derailed.
The person there wasnÆt a boy, to begin with.
ôàAyanami?ö
Those strange red eyes met hers.
ôDid you send me that message?ö
She was actually surprised when the other girl gave her a short nod.
Her expression didnÆt change. It never did, like a dollÆs. It annoyed her.
Good. Annoyance led to anger. Anger, she could use to focus herself. As usual.
ôWhat the did you call me out for? I could be eating right now.ö Left unsaid was that it was KatsuragiÆs turn to cook. She didnÆt really feel like testing to see if her cooking was always that bad.
Slowly, mechanically, the other girl stood up, picking up a grocery bag Asuka only noticed now. She didnÆt bother to dust her skirt.
ôFollow me,ö she said, quietly. It could have been a whisper of the wind.
Against her better judgment, Asuka did.
-----------
ôàUhà where are we going?ö
For a few seconds, Ayanami didnÆt answer, and just when Asuka was starting to think the other girl was ignoring her, she replied, ômy residence.ö
Asuka stopped. ôàerà just so you know, Ià eràI donÆt likeà I meanàö For the first time ever, Asuka saw AyanamiÆs expression change. The raised eyebrow spoke so loudly Asuka found herself spluttering in embarrassment. ôIùI mean, how much further is it? IÆm starting to get hungry here.ö
ôànot much further.ö
Would it kill her to use more words than what absolutely necessary?
Damnit. That girl pissed her off to no end, and she did it without even doing anything! That pissed her off!
àagain!
She was less than pleased when Ayanami finally took her inside a building that could only be declared a slump. If her own housing arrangements were unfitting for a pilot, then AyanamiÆs were unfitting for a dog, never mind a girl her age! Her apartment was no better: a bed with bloodstains, a small chest of drawers against the dirty walls, a small low-set table on the grimy floor, and a strange moldy smell in the air. Ayanami put the grocery bag on the table, then kneeled at it and, with just a sight, invited Asuka to join her. The redhead went to sit, but after glancing at the floor, held herself.
ôIsà it ok if I use the bed instead?ö
The bluette blinked. Then blinked again.
ôGo ahead.ö
So she sat. Ayanami opened the bag and pulled out a pair of cup ramen packages which she then methodically prepared. Not one word was exchanged. When it was ready, the pale girl put it in her hands.
ôWait for it cool. Three minutes.ö
ôàö
And as she waited, her patience evaporated slowly. Finally, sheÆd had enough and put the cup on the table.
ôWhy the hell did you bring me here? If you wanted to talk, then talk already!ö
The other girl looked at her for another moment, then nodded. ôàunderstood.ö
And she spoke.
ôI am not an ordinary human,ö she declared. ôI am a Man-Phantom-Contact-Humanoid-Interface, created for the purpose of creating a contact withùö
ôYouÆre a what now?ö Great, she was delusional on top of being weird? WasnÆt being delusional already being weird? Argh!
Ayanami blinked, then repeated, ôa Man-Phantom-Contact-Humanoid-Interface. In simpler terms, I could be described as an extraterrestrial, at least in part.ö
ôàExtraà terrestrial. As in, little green men from mars.ö What was she, stupid?
ôThat is inaccurate. The Spectral Hegemonic Entity is a being from outside this world. It does not possess a physical form, nor is it contained in a specific location. All that is dead returns to it, and all that lives comes from it. It simply is.ö
Great. So the First Child was a delusional Weirdo who wanted her to join her freaky religion.
ôFourteen years ago, an event came to the attention of the Spectral Hegemonic Entityàö
ôSecond impact, right?ö all neo-religions used it as one of their basic events, after allù
ôIncorrect,ö Ayanami said, ôthough not completely unconnected. The event in question precedes Second Impact by nearly eleven months. Three minutes have passed.ö
ôUh?ö
She had her answer when the other girl ripped open her cup ramen and started eating. Asuka resisted the urge to throw her own cup in the red-eyed nutcaseÆs face.
ôààso?ö she asked once Ayanami was done chewing. The faster Ayanami was done, the faster she could get the hell out of here, right? Not that she couldnÆt right nowà
But somehow, the thought of just running away from Ayanami right now scared the crap out of her.
ôàThe Hegemonic Entity detected that a set of souls disconnected from itself had made their apparition. This was impossible. This new set of souls further complicated things when one of them caused a large disturbance in the spectral plane and caused a sizable portion of the living beings on this world to return to it.ö
ôUh huh,ö Asuka said, pretending to understand.
ôThis event is what the humans call Second Impact. But it is unimportant. The disturbance and the disconnected souls were what really intrigued and bothered the Hegemonic Entity. Souls cannot exist without a connection to each other and a place to return to. They require a point of origin. To find that point of origin, it was decided that a way to explore the world over the spectral plane was required. That is me.ö
ôUh huh,ö please stop talking, Asuka was silently begging.
ôIt did not take me long to discover the outer beingsÆ point of origin, in the form of Shinji Ikari. That his date of procreation matches precisely with the apparition of the outer beings only confirmsùö
ôWaitwaitwait, back up. Ikari? As in, Third Child? Spineless? That Ikari?ö
Ayanami nodded in confirmation. ôHe is the point of origin, and the point of return of the Outer Beings.ö
ôAnd those Outer Beingsàö This was ridiculous. Why was she taking this seriously? It was all nothing but a big joke. It couldnÆt be anything else than a big joke.
ôHuman beings call them æmessengersÆ, or æAngelsÆ.ö
àwhat the FUCK?
----------------
The Depression of Ikari Shinji. I only wanted to write a short idea ficlet, but my muses grabbed it with both hands, and just wouldnÆt let go.
Yes, this is the Melancholy of Suzumiya Haruhi, Evangelion versionà which of course makes it completely different. ReiÆs story is mostly to make the Data Entity match with Eva. A Soul Entity instead. Whee!
And, of course, Rei canÆt be the only oneà
-----------------
ôI take it Ayanami talked to you?ö
ôàdonÆt tell me youÆre part of her creepy Spineless-loving religion too?ö
An amused smile came over the stoogeÆs face. ôThatÆs an interesting way of seeing ità but no, I am not part of miss AyanamiÆsà faction. The truth is, I am not a human of this era.ö He paused a moment, just long enough to raise his big dorky glasses back on his nose, and continued, ôI come from the future.ö
This truly couldnÆt get any worse.
-----------------
Andà
-----------------
ôSo, Hikari, what did you want to show me?ö
ôDo you trust me?ö
ôWhatÆs this out of the blue? Sure, I guessàö
ôThenà close your eyes, and donÆt open them.ö
ôAhà oàokà?ö
She nearly had a heart attack when her friendÆs hand closed around hers. She was tugged forward into taking two, three steps, then the hand vanished.
ôYou can open your eyes, now.ö
And what she saw wasà ruins.
ôThis is a world created by Shinji Ikari.ö
Et tu, Hikari?!
-----------------
Alternatively, this could be called the ôMake Asuka Insane Projectö.
Shinji is different from Haruhi in many ways, giving them the same power therefore causes a different effect. As Shinji grows to loathe the world around him, the Angels attack the real world instead of his inner world; essentially, heÆs a depressed Haruhi. His closed space is a complete wreck, constantly attacked by Angels, which pop out in the real world every now and then.
If heÆs allowed to be happy, though, the angels stop appearingà
Enter Asuka, tsundere extraordinaire, with her mostly useless companions, trying to keep the most angst-prone boy in the animeverse happy for the sake of the world.
:yay:
Well, thatÆs it. If someone wants to pick up the concept, go ahead, thatÆs why I put it here.
---------------
Asuka Langley Sorhyu was pissed.
No, she reflected as she stared in the immobile surface of the tea (yech!) cooling before her eyes, she wasnÆt just pissed. She was well past pissed and on her way to true anger. Everything about Japan, or so it had seemed for the entire time sheÆd been here (a full week already!), existed for the sole purpose of annoying her.
Katsuragi MisatoÆs apartment was tiny; back home in Germany, sheÆd had a real house, a full five room building in which sheÆd lived practically alone, except for the annoyingly frequent times that annoying lady who dated her dad came over, or when Kaji-san found enough time to give her a visit. Her room had been large enough that containing her bed and her every worldly possession had not made it any difficult to cross it.
Here, she lived in a tiny four room apartment, with 2 other people and a pet; her room was barely big enough for that mattress those uneducated Japanese seemed to believe replaced a proper sleeping surface, and for barely half of what sheÆd brought over. SheÆd thought her living arrangements would befit an important person such as her, but no! Apparently not! Apparently, they decided that she, genius and college graduate at fourteen, she, one of the only three people in the world capable of piloting the Evangelion and saving the world, was worth nothing more than this hole in the wall!
It had to be because of the other pilots, sheÆd already decided. Wallflowers didnÆt begin to describe them. It seemed neither of them understood just how important they were, just how much they (and therefore she) deserved. But then, this didnÆt surprise her. The Third Child, Ikari Shinji, the supposed prodigy who went out, fought and defeated an angel on his first time in an Eva, was barely worth the socks he walked in. When he breathed in, the molecules of air probably asked permission to flow into his bloodstream, and when he breathed out, it was with an apology.
As for the other, she wasà
She wasà
àshe was the main source of AsukaÆs current ire.
---------------
Middle school sucked.
It especially sucked the second time around.
It sucked even more when your teacher seemed to have nothing to talk about than the Second Impact, the troubles around it and how grateful modern youth should be for the Herculean efforts of their parents to put everything back on track.
And it reached the epitome of sucking when she couldnÆt even log on the net for something, anything to distract her mind, because one of the hormonal idiots in the class, smitten by her beauty, would inevitably try to send her an IM in a transparent attempt to ask her out. And none of them had had the balls to actually ask so far! What kind of country was this, and what kind of ball-less men did it make? It was insulting!
It was too bad there seemed to be no one in this class she could chat to (except Hikari Horaki, but the class president simply couldnÆt be caught chatting in class). The other girls were all vapid faceless drones, intimidated and brought to shameful silence by her greatness. The only other candidate was the First Child, Ayanami Rei, but trying to talk to her, it seemed, was less productive than trying to strike up a conversation with drying paint.
ôàand on October 19th, when the dam finally broke, there was no one left in the village, thanks to a warning transmitted through the defended telephone linesàö
Well, whoop-dee-doo for them. Screw it, she couldnÆt continue this. With a sigh of resignation, she turned on her computer and logged on. She counted the seconds it took for someone to talk to herà
1.
2.
3.
4ùblip. Message.
She blinked. That was fast, even for them. Especially for them. She was just that irresistible, apparently.
She ignored the ôCallö icon with a disdainful sniff.
Blip. The icon started blinking. Another message had appeared in it.
Blip. And another.
She tried to continue ignoring it, but the little flash ended up burning through her patience. She clicked on it.
: After school, 17:30
: Bench near the western stairs
: IÆll be waiting
She blinked, then re-read the message. Then she blinked again. She furtively looked around the class, to see who had been the one to so bravùso callously summon Her like this. There was no one.
She sniffed in disdain and wiped the message away. As if! That perverted boy probably wouldnÆt show up. Why, she was certain! She knew it! No one in this country had any balls to speak of, so why should this one be any different? A real man would have caught her after class, maybe tried to talk her into paying her a drink or something, not an unromantic message like that.
Na. Whoever had written this was ballsier than the rest of the country, but still not enough for her.
So she ignored it, and at 17:30 that day, she was watching television with Pen-pen lying on her lap like a big pillow.
But the next dayà
Blip. Blip, Blip.
: After school, 17:30
: Bench near the western stairs
: IÆll be waiting
The same message. Hmph! No originality, either.
But if this was going to become a habit, then sheÆd go. SheÆd go and tell him exactly why he shouldnÆt be bothering Asuka Langley with his half-balls!
So, that day at 17:25, she was walking over to the bench near the western stairs with a confident, angry stride, mentally reciting everything sheÆd tell to that perverted, no-good boy.
Then she reached the bench and the person sitting on it, and her mind derailed.
The person there wasnÆt a boy, to begin with.
ôàAyanami?ö
Those strange red eyes met hers.
ôDid you send me that message?ö
She was actually surprised when the other girl gave her a short nod.
Her expression didnÆt change. It never did, like a dollÆs. It annoyed her.
Good. Annoyance led to anger. Anger, she could use to focus herself. As usual.
ôWhat the did you call me out for? I could be eating right now.ö Left unsaid was that it was KatsuragiÆs turn to cook. She didnÆt really feel like testing to see if her cooking was always that bad.
Slowly, mechanically, the other girl stood up, picking up a grocery bag Asuka only noticed now. She didnÆt bother to dust her skirt.
ôFollow me,ö she said, quietly. It could have been a whisper of the wind.
Against her better judgment, Asuka did.
-----------
ôàUhà where are we going?ö
For a few seconds, Ayanami didnÆt answer, and just when Asuka was starting to think the other girl was ignoring her, she replied, ômy residence.ö
Asuka stopped. ôàerà just so you know, Ià eràI donÆt likeà I meanàö For the first time ever, Asuka saw AyanamiÆs expression change. The raised eyebrow spoke so loudly Asuka found herself spluttering in embarrassment. ôIùI mean, how much further is it? IÆm starting to get hungry here.ö
ôànot much further.ö
Would it kill her to use more words than what absolutely necessary?
Damnit. That girl pissed her off to no end, and she did it without even doing anything! That pissed her off!
àagain!
She was less than pleased when Ayanami finally took her inside a building that could only be declared a slump. If her own housing arrangements were unfitting for a pilot, then AyanamiÆs were unfitting for a dog, never mind a girl her age! Her apartment was no better: a bed with bloodstains, a small chest of drawers against the dirty walls, a small low-set table on the grimy floor, and a strange moldy smell in the air. Ayanami put the grocery bag on the table, then kneeled at it and, with just a sight, invited Asuka to join her. The redhead went to sit, but after glancing at the floor, held herself.
ôIsà it ok if I use the bed instead?ö
The bluette blinked. Then blinked again.
ôGo ahead.ö
So she sat. Ayanami opened the bag and pulled out a pair of cup ramen packages which she then methodically prepared. Not one word was exchanged. When it was ready, the pale girl put it in her hands.
ôWait for it cool. Three minutes.ö
ôàö
And as she waited, her patience evaporated slowly. Finally, sheÆd had enough and put the cup on the table.
ôWhy the hell did you bring me here? If you wanted to talk, then talk already!ö
The other girl looked at her for another moment, then nodded. ôàunderstood.ö
And she spoke.
ôI am not an ordinary human,ö she declared. ôI am a Man-Phantom-Contact-Humanoid-Interface, created for the purpose of creating a contact withùö
ôYouÆre a what now?ö Great, she was delusional on top of being weird? WasnÆt being delusional already being weird? Argh!
Ayanami blinked, then repeated, ôa Man-Phantom-Contact-Humanoid-Interface. In simpler terms, I could be described as an extraterrestrial, at least in part.ö
ôàExtraà terrestrial. As in, little green men from mars.ö What was she, stupid?
ôThat is inaccurate. The Spectral Hegemonic Entity is a being from outside this world. It does not possess a physical form, nor is it contained in a specific location. All that is dead returns to it, and all that lives comes from it. It simply is.ö
Great. So the First Child was a delusional Weirdo who wanted her to join her freaky religion.
ôFourteen years ago, an event came to the attention of the Spectral Hegemonic Entityàö
ôSecond impact, right?ö all neo-religions used it as one of their basic events, after allù
ôIncorrect,ö Ayanami said, ôthough not completely unconnected. The event in question precedes Second Impact by nearly eleven months. Three minutes have passed.ö
ôUh?ö
She had her answer when the other girl ripped open her cup ramen and started eating. Asuka resisted the urge to throw her own cup in the red-eyed nutcaseÆs face.
ôààso?ö she asked once Ayanami was done chewing. The faster Ayanami was done, the faster she could get the hell out of here, right? Not that she couldnÆt right nowà
But somehow, the thought of just running away from Ayanami right now scared the crap out of her.
ôàThe Hegemonic Entity detected that a set of souls disconnected from itself had made their apparition. This was impossible. This new set of souls further complicated things when one of them caused a large disturbance in the spectral plane and caused a sizable portion of the living beings on this world to return to it.ö
ôUh huh,ö Asuka said, pretending to understand.
ôThis event is what the humans call Second Impact. But it is unimportant. The disturbance and the disconnected souls were what really intrigued and bothered the Hegemonic Entity. Souls cannot exist without a connection to each other and a place to return to. They require a point of origin. To find that point of origin, it was decided that a way to explore the world over the spectral plane was required. That is me.ö
ôUh huh,ö please stop talking, Asuka was silently begging.
ôIt did not take me long to discover the outer beingsÆ point of origin, in the form of Shinji Ikari. That his date of procreation matches precisely with the apparition of the outer beings only confirmsùö
ôWaitwaitwait, back up. Ikari? As in, Third Child? Spineless? That Ikari?ö
Ayanami nodded in confirmation. ôHe is the point of origin, and the point of return of the Outer Beings.ö
ôAnd those Outer Beingsàö This was ridiculous. Why was she taking this seriously? It was all nothing but a big joke. It couldnÆt be anything else than a big joke.
ôHuman beings call them æmessengersÆ, or æAngelsÆ.ö
àwhat the FUCK?
----------------
The Depression of Ikari Shinji. I only wanted to write a short idea ficlet, but my muses grabbed it with both hands, and just wouldnÆt let go.
Yes, this is the Melancholy of Suzumiya Haruhi, Evangelion versionà which of course makes it completely different. ReiÆs story is mostly to make the Data Entity match with Eva. A Soul Entity instead. Whee!
And, of course, Rei canÆt be the only oneà
-----------------
ôI take it Ayanami talked to you?ö
ôàdonÆt tell me youÆre part of her creepy Spineless-loving religion too?ö
An amused smile came over the stoogeÆs face. ôThatÆs an interesting way of seeing ità but no, I am not part of miss AyanamiÆsà faction. The truth is, I am not a human of this era.ö He paused a moment, just long enough to raise his big dorky glasses back on his nose, and continued, ôI come from the future.ö
This truly couldnÆt get any worse.
-----------------
Andà
-----------------
ôSo, Hikari, what did you want to show me?ö
ôDo you trust me?ö
ôWhatÆs this out of the blue? Sure, I guessàö
ôThenà close your eyes, and donÆt open them.ö
ôAhà oàokà?ö
She nearly had a heart attack when her friendÆs hand closed around hers. She was tugged forward into taking two, three steps, then the hand vanished.
ôYou can open your eyes, now.ö
And what she saw wasà ruins.
ôThis is a world created by Shinji Ikari.ö
Et tu, Hikari?!
-----------------
Alternatively, this could be called the ôMake Asuka Insane Projectö.
Shinji is different from Haruhi in many ways, giving them the same power therefore causes a different effect. As Shinji grows to loathe the world around him, the Angels attack the real world instead of his inner world; essentially, heÆs a depressed Haruhi. His closed space is a complete wreck, constantly attacked by Angels, which pop out in the real world every now and then.
If heÆs allowed to be happy, though, the angels stop appearingà
Enter Asuka, tsundere extraordinaire, with her mostly useless companions, trying to keep the most angst-prone boy in the animeverse happy for the sake of the world.
:yay:
Well, thatÆs it. If someone wants to pick up the concept, go ahead, thatÆs why I put it here.
