AN: Tapping this out on a phone. Started 27 minutes before the deadline.
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter
The Next Dark Lord
Becoming the Dark Lord is generally a lifelong quest. One begins by surpassing the plebeian magical interests of the general population and delving into the forbidden "Dark Magic."
Necromancy. Mind control. The manipulation of fate. Travelling through time without the constraints of a Time Turner. Reaching beyond the walls of this world towards the creatures that howl for souls in the empty expanse between the stars.
This makes one a dark wizard, for though the search for this knowledge is treacherous and deadly, there are many others on the path to power.
To become the Dark Lord, a wizard must rise above his cohorts, dominating them utterly into subservience to his will. In this way can a handful of wizards threaten an entire world: for they are possessed of terrible knowledge and an even more potent ambition.
All dark wizards seek to become the dark wizard, the Dark Lord.
Which makes Hermione Granger's undisputed claim to the title all the more mystifying.
She did not abandon her friends for power, nor did she barter her soul for eldritch power, or study under a previois Dark Lord and murder him in his sleep.
She was merely firmly convinced that everyone should follow The Rules.
-------------------
Hermione looked around the train carriage carefully, searching for some hint of reason.
She found none.
Admittedly, it was her first day amongst the general wizarding populace (Diagon Alley aside, where she had been too excited to ask questions,) and she couldn't make heads or tails of things. It was like they had no idea what the real world had accomplished in the past two hundred years, but they were seated in a train.
Somebody should really explain to them that Muggles weren't witch-burning peasants any more...
--------------------
"So why don't we just shoot him in the head?" Hermione asked.
Tonks sighed. "You don't understand. Voldemort has all sorts of protective magic about him. Even if we did ambush him, any curse we hit him with wohldnt do anything."
Hermione shook her head. "No, I mean with a gun. From half a mile away. The bullets break the sound barrier, so it would hit him before he heard or saw anything. And even if it doesn't kill him, it should at least incapacitate him. Right?"
The Order of the Phoenix had no response.
--------------------
In the aftermath of the war, Hermione continued to "persuade" more and more people to her point of view on various issues.
Few wizards, even powerful dark ones, are inclined to argue with the Witch Who Fired the Shot Heard Round the World.
Her maniacal laughter whenever she heard her title only made them fear her more. If she could kill the Dark Lord with her bizarre Muggle magic, what would stop her from using it on them? By unspoken agreement, they fell in line with her demands, using their money and family prestige to "modernize" the Wizarding World.
It took them a few years to notice that all of Britain's dark wizards were bending knee to a powerful witch possessed of foreign power beyond the ken of normal wizards. They relaxed, finally understanding that they were just under the rule of the newest Dark Lord.
They quickly learned to not call her on it in public. For some reason Granger took offense to being called "The World's Most Successful Dark Lord," and vehemently denied her promotion to the position from her previous title of "that fucking Mudblood."
The dark wizards collectively shrugged. They understood what was going on, even if their Lord denied it.
They were used to eccentric leadership.
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter
The Next Dark Lord
Becoming the Dark Lord is generally a lifelong quest. One begins by surpassing the plebeian magical interests of the general population and delving into the forbidden "Dark Magic."
Necromancy. Mind control. The manipulation of fate. Travelling through time without the constraints of a Time Turner. Reaching beyond the walls of this world towards the creatures that howl for souls in the empty expanse between the stars.
This makes one a dark wizard, for though the search for this knowledge is treacherous and deadly, there are many others on the path to power.
To become the Dark Lord, a wizard must rise above his cohorts, dominating them utterly into subservience to his will. In this way can a handful of wizards threaten an entire world: for they are possessed of terrible knowledge and an even more potent ambition.
All dark wizards seek to become the dark wizard, the Dark Lord.
Which makes Hermione Granger's undisputed claim to the title all the more mystifying.
She did not abandon her friends for power, nor did she barter her soul for eldritch power, or study under a previois Dark Lord and murder him in his sleep.
She was merely firmly convinced that everyone should follow The Rules.
-------------------
Hermione looked around the train carriage carefully, searching for some hint of reason.
She found none.
Admittedly, it was her first day amongst the general wizarding populace (Diagon Alley aside, where she had been too excited to ask questions,) and she couldn't make heads or tails of things. It was like they had no idea what the real world had accomplished in the past two hundred years, but they were seated in a train.
Somebody should really explain to them that Muggles weren't witch-burning peasants any more...
--------------------
"So why don't we just shoot him in the head?" Hermione asked.
Tonks sighed. "You don't understand. Voldemort has all sorts of protective magic about him. Even if we did ambush him, any curse we hit him with wohldnt do anything."
Hermione shook her head. "No, I mean with a gun. From half a mile away. The bullets break the sound barrier, so it would hit him before he heard or saw anything. And even if it doesn't kill him, it should at least incapacitate him. Right?"
The Order of the Phoenix had no response.
--------------------
In the aftermath of the war, Hermione continued to "persuade" more and more people to her point of view on various issues.
Few wizards, even powerful dark ones, are inclined to argue with the Witch Who Fired the Shot Heard Round the World.
Her maniacal laughter whenever she heard her title only made them fear her more. If she could kill the Dark Lord with her bizarre Muggle magic, what would stop her from using it on them? By unspoken agreement, they fell in line with her demands, using their money and family prestige to "modernize" the Wizarding World.
It took them a few years to notice that all of Britain's dark wizards were bending knee to a powerful witch possessed of foreign power beyond the ken of normal wizards. They relaxed, finally understanding that they were just under the rule of the newest Dark Lord.
They quickly learned to not call her on it in public. For some reason Granger took offense to being called "The World's Most Successful Dark Lord," and vehemently denied her promotion to the position from her previous title of "that fucking Mudblood."
The dark wizards collectively shrugged. They understood what was going on, even if their Lord denied it.
They were used to eccentric leadership.
