EDIT: I went back and re-read the challenge, so I changed a bit of the beginning and my æoutlineÆ for laterà I think itÆs a bit funnier, and it will be later, considering the flash of inspiration I had.
For some reason, I've found myself able to actually take an idea (or the beginning of one anyway) and do something with it. Disturbingly, they both involved Sasuke, which is strange since the only Uchiha I've ever been any sort of a fan of is Itachi.
Anyway, I checked out Mr. Mysterious' Anti-Naruto-Yaoi challenge and was reminded of either a one-off or a part of a crack-fic with a similar element. Naruto and Sasuke getting each others body. And, this came out fairly easily.
This is only the third time I've tried my hand at this, so be sure to tell me what I'm doing both right and wrong. I'm not going to beg for feedback, but until I'm sure people really do enjoy reading what I'm doing the feedback-level may be directly connected to my output-level. Unless I get struck by an idea, obviously.
My ideas/outline/request for suggestions are at the bottom, so without further delay I present:
~~~
Response to:
The Anti-Naruto-Yaoi Challenge, Body Switching Idea that was Presented by Mr. Mysterious
~~~
ôIdiot, stop fidgeting!ö
ôBut itÆs taking so long! What could take so long about trying to read this guyÆs pee?!ö
ôItÆs chi you utter fool. Now knock it off before you interrupt the guyÆs concentration.ö
ôHey! You think you can make me shut up you arrogant bastard?ö
ôThatÆs it, IÆm going to turn you into a pretzel!ö
ôOh yeah! Take this! Kage Bunshin--ö
ôStop! We canÆt use chakra in this-- ö
ôùno Jutsu!ö
A crash. The sound of something magical shattering. A æOminous Feeling of Growing UneaseÆÖ.
Pain.
Capital P. Double underlined, italicized and bolded.
Searing. Burning. Hot. Stabbing. Pins & Needles. Knives. Throbbing. Raw.
Constant. Endless. Unfathomable. Infinite.
Capital P A I N pain.
Then, blackness.
~~~
ôWhatà happened?ö
A voice sounded to his left, ôWe were hoping you would be able to tell us that.ö Turning, he saw something that put him on edge on an indefinable, and undeniable level, but he couldnÆt figure out why. It was just a nurse standing there smiling at him.
ôYour jounin sensei and your third teammate found you and the other member of your team collapsed in the sealed room you were waiting in. Somehow, something interrupted the OnmyojiÆs chi readings for your client, something about a ægreat evil disturbance the likes of which had never been felt beforeÆ or the like.ö She helpfully filled him in. Minor warning bell number two.
Thinking back, the last thing he could recall was the damn bastard picking a fight with him while heÆd been innocently wondering why everything was taking so long. The next thing he knew, the prick had gotten completely bent out of shape and so heÆd responded in kind and thenà nothing.
ôThe last thing I recall was fighting with that idiot thenà I canÆt remember.ö He told her somewhat hesitantly. He was no stranger to passing out, whether it was from training or lying in wait too long without having a chance to eat or something, but for some reason, he felt like heÆd forgotten something. Something important.
ôWell,ö the nurse sniffed somewhat stiffly, as though she wanted to say a great deal more, ôI donÆt know what they were thinking putting you with that boy but at as long as youÆre alright, I suppose everything fine. And youÆll remember eventually no doubt. All you need is some rest.ö she soothed obsequiously before walking over and opening the door.
ôWeÆve finished all of our tests but we didnÆt find anything wrong. Your sensei okayed it, so you can check out as soon as you feel better. Please be more careful from now onàö
~~~
ôWhatà? Howà?ö He looked around to find himself standing in ankle deep water in what looked like a sewer.
ôHm. That is what I would like to know, little duckling.ö came the booming voiceà from right behind him.
Spinning around he saw a large gate, many times taller than himself, with a small, hard to make out piece of paper shaped like an ofuda where the lock ought to have been. Behind that, there was nothing but darkness. Darkness, and a feeling of extreme but latent malice that not even the battle between his sensei and the missing nin Momochi Zabuza could even begin to compare to.
Looking closer, but seeing nothing he shouted out his demand, ôWho said that! WhoÆs there?ö
His response was a deep, booming, mocking laughter. ôAh. You do not know then.ö
ôCome closer, and I shall tell you.ö Seeing nothing to be gained by standing there, he did that, not noticing the strange weight just above his ankles.
Once he drew close, however, he fell flat on his ass as a set of incredible, monstrous claws nearly vivisected him æsternum to stemÆ. ôGah!ö
Mindless of his position on the ground he could only stare as a giant pair of slit red eyes opened within the darkness. Eyes that held more malice than anything else imaginable. ôChe. I had hoped that the seal would not protect you, all things considered, but that damnable yellow rat was through, if not sane.ö
ôWhatà? Whoà?ö Unable to form a complete sentence, he could only stare in horrified awe as light seemed to suddenly penetrate the darkness just a little, revealing the large face of a fox. A fox straight from hell.
ôCloser the first time, duckling. Listen well, I shall speak but once. I am Kyuubi! The Nine-Tailed Demon Fox! Strongest of the Tailed Beasts! Lord of the Country you ants call Fire! I am the existence without peer!ö The voice was older than time, dark, malicious, vengeful. The incarnate of wrath itself. With a sudden movement the great beast threw itself side first against the bars of its prison, sending shockwaves under him. ôAnd thanks to your venerated Fourth Hokage, I am sealed within this pathetic body unless I divine a way to free myself. Howeverà that is what makes things so interesting. For you see this is not where you should be. Or rather, you are not wearing the face you should beàö
~~~
ôàSasuke-sama./Uchiha Sasukeö
~~~
ôà/àö
ôShit.ö
~~~
Remember. I need no more respect for continuity or characterization or jutsu than Kishimoto. I plan on referring to GHÆs (I think it was GH) Naruto done TFF style topic frequently. Or at least often. Maybe sometimes?
Timeframe is one month (or so) before the chuunin exam. Assuming they went to the Wave after a month/month and a half, and the chuunin exam takes place four months after that.
For the record, IÆm not a Sasuke fan. Quite the opposite. ThatÆs why he keeps getting fucked over. Literally the first time. This time? Sasuke and Orange. While I can obviously imagine it, and even make it happenà can you imagine KishimotoÆs Emo-duck wearing orange? Ever? (as an aside, but a purple bowÆs alright??) And while he might be able to beat his brother, having Naruto essentially æout UchihaÆ him at everything but aloof-asshole-ness and the fire element(?). And even then heÆll only be a better aloof-asshole until Naruto meets Neji. Naruto is probably a better actor so the concept æhow would Sasuke handle-thisÆ will quickly become an amusing element (as long as I donÆt forget).
Also, if you ever think this isnÆt funny enough or come up with a funny scene, please share. I plan for this to be humorà but I donÆt know if IÆm that funny, now do I?
[random question]Also, do I overuse blackouts?[/random question]
EDIT: It occurs to me that pointing people to the place I got the idea from might be good. It can be found here.
For some reason, I've found myself able to actually take an idea (or the beginning of one anyway) and do something with it. Disturbingly, they both involved Sasuke, which is strange since the only Uchiha I've ever been any sort of a fan of is Itachi.
Anyway, I checked out Mr. Mysterious' Anti-Naruto-Yaoi challenge and was reminded of either a one-off or a part of a crack-fic with a similar element. Naruto and Sasuke getting each others body. And, this came out fairly easily.
This is only the third time I've tried my hand at this, so be sure to tell me what I'm doing both right and wrong. I'm not going to beg for feedback, but until I'm sure people really do enjoy reading what I'm doing the feedback-level may be directly connected to my output-level. Unless I get struck by an idea, obviously.
My ideas/outline/request for suggestions are at the bottom, so without further delay I present:
~~~
Response to:
The Anti-Naruto-Yaoi Challenge, Body Switching Idea that was Presented by Mr. Mysterious
~~~
ôIdiot, stop fidgeting!ö
ôBut itÆs taking so long! What could take so long about trying to read this guyÆs pee?!ö
ôItÆs chi you utter fool. Now knock it off before you interrupt the guyÆs concentration.ö
ôHey! You think you can make me shut up you arrogant bastard?ö
ôThatÆs it, IÆm going to turn you into a pretzel!ö
ôOh yeah! Take this! Kage Bunshin--ö
ôStop! We canÆt use chakra in this-- ö
ôùno Jutsu!ö
A crash. The sound of something magical shattering. A æOminous Feeling of Growing UneaseÆÖ.
Pain.
Capital P. Double underlined, italicized and bolded.
Searing. Burning. Hot. Stabbing. Pins & Needles. Knives. Throbbing. Raw.
Constant. Endless. Unfathomable. Infinite.
Capital P A I N pain.
Then, blackness.
~~~
ôWhatà happened?ö
A voice sounded to his left, ôWe were hoping you would be able to tell us that.ö Turning, he saw something that put him on edge on an indefinable, and undeniable level, but he couldnÆt figure out why. It was just a nurse standing there smiling at him.
ôYour jounin sensei and your third teammate found you and the other member of your team collapsed in the sealed room you were waiting in. Somehow, something interrupted the OnmyojiÆs chi readings for your client, something about a ægreat evil disturbance the likes of which had never been felt beforeÆ or the like.ö She helpfully filled him in. Minor warning bell number two.
Thinking back, the last thing he could recall was the damn bastard picking a fight with him while heÆd been innocently wondering why everything was taking so long. The next thing he knew, the prick had gotten completely bent out of shape and so heÆd responded in kind and thenà nothing.
ôThe last thing I recall was fighting with that idiot thenà I canÆt remember.ö He told her somewhat hesitantly. He was no stranger to passing out, whether it was from training or lying in wait too long without having a chance to eat or something, but for some reason, he felt like heÆd forgotten something. Something important.
ôWell,ö the nurse sniffed somewhat stiffly, as though she wanted to say a great deal more, ôI donÆt know what they were thinking putting you with that boy but at as long as youÆre alright, I suppose everything fine. And youÆll remember eventually no doubt. All you need is some rest.ö she soothed obsequiously before walking over and opening the door.
ôWeÆve finished all of our tests but we didnÆt find anything wrong. Your sensei okayed it, so you can check out as soon as you feel better. Please be more careful from now onàö
~~~
ôWhatà? Howà?ö He looked around to find himself standing in ankle deep water in what looked like a sewer.
ôHm. That is what I would like to know, little duckling.ö came the booming voiceà from right behind him.
Spinning around he saw a large gate, many times taller than himself, with a small, hard to make out piece of paper shaped like an ofuda where the lock ought to have been. Behind that, there was nothing but darkness. Darkness, and a feeling of extreme but latent malice that not even the battle between his sensei and the missing nin Momochi Zabuza could even begin to compare to.
Looking closer, but seeing nothing he shouted out his demand, ôWho said that! WhoÆs there?ö
His response was a deep, booming, mocking laughter. ôAh. You do not know then.ö
ôCome closer, and I shall tell you.ö Seeing nothing to be gained by standing there, he did that, not noticing the strange weight just above his ankles.
Once he drew close, however, he fell flat on his ass as a set of incredible, monstrous claws nearly vivisected him æsternum to stemÆ. ôGah!ö
Mindless of his position on the ground he could only stare as a giant pair of slit red eyes opened within the darkness. Eyes that held more malice than anything else imaginable. ôChe. I had hoped that the seal would not protect you, all things considered, but that damnable yellow rat was through, if not sane.ö
ôWhatà? Whoà?ö Unable to form a complete sentence, he could only stare in horrified awe as light seemed to suddenly penetrate the darkness just a little, revealing the large face of a fox. A fox straight from hell.
ôCloser the first time, duckling. Listen well, I shall speak but once. I am Kyuubi! The Nine-Tailed Demon Fox! Strongest of the Tailed Beasts! Lord of the Country you ants call Fire! I am the existence without peer!ö The voice was older than time, dark, malicious, vengeful. The incarnate of wrath itself. With a sudden movement the great beast threw itself side first against the bars of its prison, sending shockwaves under him. ôAnd thanks to your venerated Fourth Hokage, I am sealed within this pathetic body unless I divine a way to free myself. Howeverà that is what makes things so interesting. For you see this is not where you should be. Or rather, you are not wearing the face you should beàö
~~~
ôàSasuke-sama./Uchiha Sasukeö
~~~
ôà/àö
ôShit.ö
~~~
Remember. I need no more respect for continuity or characterization or jutsu than Kishimoto. I plan on referring to GHÆs (I think it was GH) Naruto done TFF style topic frequently. Or at least often. Maybe sometimes?
Timeframe is one month (or so) before the chuunin exam. Assuming they went to the Wave after a month/month and a half, and the chuunin exam takes place four months after that.
For the record, IÆm not a Sasuke fan. Quite the opposite. ThatÆs why he keeps getting fucked over. Literally the first time. This time? Sasuke and Orange. While I can obviously imagine it, and even make it happenà can you imagine KishimotoÆs Emo-duck wearing orange? Ever? (as an aside, but a purple bowÆs alright??) And while he might be able to beat his brother, having Naruto essentially æout UchihaÆ him at everything but aloof-asshole-ness and the fire element(?). And even then heÆll only be a better aloof-asshole until Naruto meets Neji. Naruto is probably a better actor so the concept æhow would Sasuke handle-thisÆ will quickly become an amusing element (as long as I donÆt forget).
Also, if you ever think this isnÆt funny enough or come up with a funny scene, please share. I plan for this to be humorà but I donÆt know if IÆm that funny, now do I?
[random question]Also, do I overuse blackouts?[/random question]
EDIT: It occurs to me that pointing people to the place I got the idea from might be good. It can be found here.