Ranma ½ Ferrets and Pigtails
- Thread starter NeverwhereCM
- Start date
he has been cackling off and on at Yuuno's situation almost the entire fic. Its also part of the reason why he has helped Yuuno out so much, in the 'I've dealt with this crap so long, take some advice from 'big brother'' sort of way while 'big brother' is just there to enjoy the fireworks.
Epicially hilarious.
Epicially hilarious.
Ahh...
Sorry about that. For a few weeks there everyone else in the place I live was gone. It was glorious. There's nothing quite like the freedom to run around in your underwear and make tremendous noise at three in the morning to make you abandon all sense of responsibility.
Sadly, these people have now returned from their vaction. Somehow, despite the soul devouring properties of Other M and VC2, I managed to get the following out.
---
Anya Volonzo, Queen of Azulia, stared down from her throne at the diminutive Bishop of the Hellig after the doors had closed, Akta and Yuuno departing. "I trust you have evidence that the young man has actually committed a crime?"
The girl drew herself up, managing to look somewhat prim and proper despite her injuries and torn clothing. "He is an infidel of the highest order. He has trespassed on sacred grounds and stolen an irreplaceable holy artifact."
The queen shook her head, sighing softly. "He had royal permission to be there, and the artifact was hardly stolen."
"Royal permission?! Not stolen?!" Vaalea huffed, glaring up at the queen. She opened her mouth to comment further, but the blue haired woman on the throne cut her off with a wave.
"So far as the royal surveyor is concerned, the Hellig have never claimed that site to be any different from the dozens of others like it. And as for the artifact..." She narrowed her gaze, "I assume you mean the Viahtaa. It has been safely recovered and now rests in royal hands."
"I see..." the blonde girl murmured, then straightened up, smiling. "Then I must request that such an important cultural artifact be placed in the hands of the Hellig for proper safe-keeping."
"I'm afraid not," the queen smiled right back. "We," she said with royal prerogative, "have decided to place the artifact in the royal vault." She narrowed her eyes. "Unless there is something you're not telling me about this 'cultural artifact'?"
"No," the Bishop said through gritted teeth and a fixed smile, "there isn't anything."
Nodding, the Queen smiled some more, like she was unaware of the conversation's subtext. "Excellent. I'm happy that's settled, but I do hope you have something else against Mr. Scrya. I will not appreciate having wrongfully arrested someone."
Vaalea nodded firmly, and spoke like she was revealing the word of Lider himself. "Oh yes. He is one of the Enemy."
"The Enemy." The queen was unamused, and her flat voice showed it. "The nameless, ancient Enemy. They who were so powerful, they needed only eight demons under their leader to almost destroy our entire way of life. After which those that they missed crawled out from under their rocks to begin civilization anew."
"Indeed."
Anya stared at the tiny bishop for a long, long, moment. Then she spoke. "And what signs did I miss? His genial temperament? His panic when I walked in on him and an unconscious Herce? Or perhaps his willingness to hand over the Viahtaa with a decent explanation?"
Bishop Kirkko scowled. "His name. The infiltrators did not even bother to take Azulian names!"
This was beyond ridiculous, and Anya would have laughed if the situation wasn't so serious. "So I am to be convicting people based on their names now? Surely you jest. Are you going to be going after the captain of my guard next? Her name is hardly common either."
The little blonde scowled fiercely. "Their names are from no culture on our planet! Their very existence is a threat!"
"Hmm. Interesting choice of words. 'Their'. That implies more than one." The queen's deceptively calm voice changed to something suspiciously innocuous. "On that note, I am told you took Mr. Scrya's companion. Surely you don't have a prisoner, yes? You know you don't have that sort of authority."
The little girl stiffened, but she knew the game well. "Of course not. We merely took what we thought to be a poor unconscious boy in for questioning. In addition to his name, he revealed his nature when he destroyed the cathedral despite being under the effects of a suppressor!"
The queen grinned, and Vaalea cursed inwardly at her mistake. Suppressors were for the sole use of civil authority, not ecclesiastical. Still, she pressed on. "Its use was justified! The Enemy has obviously sent infiltrators to stop us from being ready once the time of destiny is upon us!" She paused, then found a way to fight back. "Your willingness to protect them like this marks you dangerously close to heresy, majesty."
Powerful bishop or not, Vaalea Kirkko was still young, and it showed. Whenever she couldn't get something through diplomacy, she dropped her power and rank like a hammer. The queen knew better than that, but also knew that a heavy hand was required to counter here. Time to show the girl just who was in charge. The queen's eyes narrowed, and she cut the girl off with a wave. "And that threat marks you as dangerously close to treason, bishop. While you are a guest in my palace, no less."
Proving that she had survival instincts at least, Kirkko backed down. "I do apologize. The stress of the day has made me say things I shouldn't. May I have leave to depart, your majesty?" She followed this up with a deferential curtsy. She wasn'?t fooling anybody, but then, that was just the way the game of politics was played.
Anya nodded. "Go. We will continue this tomorrow."
Vaalea nodded and swept out of the room. Something obviously had to be done about the queen before anything else happened.
---
Ranma sat from where he was mostly hidden on a rooftop with a good view of the palace, taking a bite out of his sandwich. A blue sandwich. Idly, he wondered just what mold would look like on a blue sandwich, before shrugging it off. It wouldn?'t kill him. He returned his attention to the palace.
He?'d beaten the hell out of the Hellig?s two main leaders and destroyed their church, but somehow, it still didn?'t feel like enough. Yuuno was dead. It still seemed weird to him. He?'d only known the other man a few days, but then, Ranma had always been quick to form attachments and stubbornly against losing them.
The pigtailed boy sat there for a while longer, trying to figure out just what to do. It would have to wait for the next day in any event. He was in no condition to do anything right now.
---
Okay. There's Ranma. I didn't realize it until earlier today, but in word, this thing is now fifty-one pages long. We haven't directly seen Ranma since page thirty or so. Where the hell did all that time and writing go?
Sorry about that. For a few weeks there everyone else in the place I live was gone. It was glorious. There's nothing quite like the freedom to run around in your underwear and make tremendous noise at three in the morning to make you abandon all sense of responsibility.
Sadly, these people have now returned from their vaction. Somehow, despite the soul devouring properties of Other M and VC2, I managed to get the following out.
---
Anya Volonzo, Queen of Azulia, stared down from her throne at the diminutive Bishop of the Hellig after the doors had closed, Akta and Yuuno departing. "I trust you have evidence that the young man has actually committed a crime?"
The girl drew herself up, managing to look somewhat prim and proper despite her injuries and torn clothing. "He is an infidel of the highest order. He has trespassed on sacred grounds and stolen an irreplaceable holy artifact."
The queen shook her head, sighing softly. "He had royal permission to be there, and the artifact was hardly stolen."
"Royal permission?! Not stolen?!" Vaalea huffed, glaring up at the queen. She opened her mouth to comment further, but the blue haired woman on the throne cut her off with a wave.
"So far as the royal surveyor is concerned, the Hellig have never claimed that site to be any different from the dozens of others like it. And as for the artifact..." She narrowed her gaze, "I assume you mean the Viahtaa. It has been safely recovered and now rests in royal hands."
"I see..." the blonde girl murmured, then straightened up, smiling. "Then I must request that such an important cultural artifact be placed in the hands of the Hellig for proper safe-keeping."
"I'm afraid not," the queen smiled right back. "We," she said with royal prerogative, "have decided to place the artifact in the royal vault." She narrowed her eyes. "Unless there is something you're not telling me about this 'cultural artifact'?"
"No," the Bishop said through gritted teeth and a fixed smile, "there isn't anything."
Nodding, the Queen smiled some more, like she was unaware of the conversation's subtext. "Excellent. I'm happy that's settled, but I do hope you have something else against Mr. Scrya. I will not appreciate having wrongfully arrested someone."
Vaalea nodded firmly, and spoke like she was revealing the word of Lider himself. "Oh yes. He is one of the Enemy."
"The Enemy." The queen was unamused, and her flat voice showed it. "The nameless, ancient Enemy. They who were so powerful, they needed only eight demons under their leader to almost destroy our entire way of life. After which those that they missed crawled out from under their rocks to begin civilization anew."
"Indeed."
Anya stared at the tiny bishop for a long, long, moment. Then she spoke. "And what signs did I miss? His genial temperament? His panic when I walked in on him and an unconscious Herce? Or perhaps his willingness to hand over the Viahtaa with a decent explanation?"
Bishop Kirkko scowled. "His name. The infiltrators did not even bother to take Azulian names!"
This was beyond ridiculous, and Anya would have laughed if the situation wasn't so serious. "So I am to be convicting people based on their names now? Surely you jest. Are you going to be going after the captain of my guard next? Her name is hardly common either."
The little blonde scowled fiercely. "Their names are from no culture on our planet! Their very existence is a threat!"
"Hmm. Interesting choice of words. 'Their'. That implies more than one." The queen's deceptively calm voice changed to something suspiciously innocuous. "On that note, I am told you took Mr. Scrya's companion. Surely you don't have a prisoner, yes? You know you don't have that sort of authority."
The little girl stiffened, but she knew the game well. "Of course not. We merely took what we thought to be a poor unconscious boy in for questioning. In addition to his name, he revealed his nature when he destroyed the cathedral despite being under the effects of a suppressor!"
The queen grinned, and Vaalea cursed inwardly at her mistake. Suppressors were for the sole use of civil authority, not ecclesiastical. Still, she pressed on. "Its use was justified! The Enemy has obviously sent infiltrators to stop us from being ready once the time of destiny is upon us!" She paused, then found a way to fight back. "Your willingness to protect them like this marks you dangerously close to heresy, majesty."
Powerful bishop or not, Vaalea Kirkko was still young, and it showed. Whenever she couldn't get something through diplomacy, she dropped her power and rank like a hammer. The queen knew better than that, but also knew that a heavy hand was required to counter here. Time to show the girl just who was in charge. The queen's eyes narrowed, and she cut the girl off with a wave. "And that threat marks you as dangerously close to treason, bishop. While you are a guest in my palace, no less."
Proving that she had survival instincts at least, Kirkko backed down. "I do apologize. The stress of the day has made me say things I shouldn't. May I have leave to depart, your majesty?" She followed this up with a deferential curtsy. She wasn'?t fooling anybody, but then, that was just the way the game of politics was played.
Anya nodded. "Go. We will continue this tomorrow."
Vaalea nodded and swept out of the room. Something obviously had to be done about the queen before anything else happened.
---
Ranma sat from where he was mostly hidden on a rooftop with a good view of the palace, taking a bite out of his sandwich. A blue sandwich. Idly, he wondered just what mold would look like on a blue sandwich, before shrugging it off. It wouldn?'t kill him. He returned his attention to the palace.
He?'d beaten the hell out of the Hellig?s two main leaders and destroyed their church, but somehow, it still didn?'t feel like enough. Yuuno was dead. It still seemed weird to him. He?'d only known the other man a few days, but then, Ranma had always been quick to form attachments and stubbornly against losing them.
The pigtailed boy sat there for a while longer, trying to figure out just what to do. It would have to wait for the next day in any event. He was in no condition to do anything right now.
---
Okay. There's Ranma. I didn't realize it until earlier today, but in word, this thing is now fifty-one pages long. We haven't directly seen Ranma since page thirty or so. Where the hell did all that time and writing go?
I completely agree with each and every one you about the last segment. It was fucking boring. It wasn't good or bad so much as it was simply indifferent. It needed to happen from a story perspective to see the queen make a tactical blunder by winning the battle (only to lose the war later), but it was still boring.
Hopefully this will be better.
---
ôSo how long am I going to be held for?ö
Captain Sjalett shrugged as the two worked their way through the lower levels of the palace, otherwise known as the dungeon. ôI wouldn't think that it will be more than overnight. I doubt the Bishop can bring any charges to bear that her majesty cannot dismiss out of hand. Still the Hellig are powerfull, and it would not do to too heavily incur their wrath. Thus, you may be here for the full day before being released.ö
Yuuno nodded. It seemed reasonable - or at least as reasonable as things were going to get for the moment. A day to himself, behind bars or not, would give him some time to think. But more information was in order before he made any sort of decision. ôWhy is the church so powerful, anyway? The people I've seen don't seem overly religious.ö
Akta shook her head, a red curl peeking out from under her head-wrap for a moment. ôThe Azulians hold their religion close to their hearts. There is no need for them to display religious fervor when they are true believers surrounded by true believers. Their religion is as self evident as the cycle of the sun and the moon. It is there and omnipresent; there is no need to draw excessive attention to it.ö
Yuuno arched a brow. ô'The Azulians'?ö
There was an amused crinkle in her eye. ôI, too, am a foreigner, though perhaps not as foreign as yourself. I hail from Artania, one of the largest continuous landmasses on the planet. This,ö she touched her head wrap, ôis an affection of my homeland. Removing it, while not forbidden, would be considered... vulgar.ö
Yuuno nodded thoughtfully. Under most circumstances he would be fascinated by continuing along this line of thought (Cultural variation, not vulgarity!), but here and now other concerns were more pressing.
When Yuuno sheepishly pointed this out, the redhead laughed. ôIndeed. I do not believe the Hellig will let this go either.ö She frowned. ôYou may have noticed - in fact it is impossible not to notice - that this country shares the same name as the planet itself. This is not something that sits well with the other countries here.ö
ôI imagine it seems pretty arrogant to them,ö Yuuno murmured as they started down a flight of steps.
ôYes. There have been many attempts to subjugate Azulia. Each and every one of them has been repelled, but not by Azulia's standing army.ö
ôThe Hellig repel them?ö Yuuno's eyes bugged out a bit, before he frowned, trying to block out their newly barred surroundings. ôHow? They seem to have some competent warriors and mages, but nothing insurmountable.ö
She shook her head, before selecting a cell and opening it, gesturing for him to enter. ôThe Hellig are capable of miracles on a grand scale. The last time an invader sent a fleet against Azulia, it was destroyed before coming in sight of shore by a massive column of energy from the heavens. They spoke of it as a 'miracle of Lider'.ö
Or possibly a starship's main gun, Yuuno thought grimly as she locked the cell door behind him, given what Ranma had to say. ôI'm surprised they're not in total control then,ö was all he said aloud, however.
Akta shrugged as she leaned against the bars. ôIt is as her majesty said earlier. The Hellig have proven notoriously inept at running a country. It has happened a few times in Azulia's history, the church usurping the throne's power, but always they expect the people to work for them without pay, just as in their devotions. If the people are forced to work, they rebel, if they are not, the Hellig are forced back into their role for lack of finances.ö
Yuuno considered this. ôSo they always fail at running things because they can't make a distinction between the secular and ecclesiastical duties.ö
The guard captain made a noise of agreement, and they stayed as they were on opposite sides of the bars for a few minutes, Yuuno look up through the barred, high set window well for a while. Finally Yuuno asked another question. ôYou were talking earlier about your home country?ö
She laughed again. ôYou truly wish to know?ö
Yuuno shrugged. ôAt its core, archeology is about understanding other cultures, it's just the how that's different from most anything else.ö
Akta pulled forward from her position along the bars, then stretched her leg out of sight to pull a stool over with her foot, which she promptly say upon. ôVery well. I suppose I could tell you a few things. Firstly, the church is very different. Rather than being centered around worship of anything specific, it's centered around defense. Artanian priests would always tell us that the moon is the harbringer of our doom. 'When the moon reflects Azulia, there shall be a plague of beasts throughout the land', and 'the moon shall destroy all it turns its gaze upon'.ö
ôHeh.ö In prison or not, Yuuno was now in his element. The next few hours passed in conversation, before his company excused herself to go catch some sleep before her next shift. Finally, though, he was all alone in his cell.
Hey, did you know that if I manipulate my visual inputs just right, I can see right through most clothing?
Okay, maybe not as alone as he'd probably like to be. Is that why you were so quiet?
Duh, Jed sent out, I mean, it wasn't perfect... Transparent or not, her armor still prevented any jiggle from showing, but...
Yuuno sighed at the obvious resonse. Ugh. Whatever. Let's just get some work done.
So we're going to bust out of here and join the lovely Captain Sjalett to unwrap more than just her headscarf?
No, Yuuno replied, ignoring that, we're going to get some work done on the datapad.
Er... Yuuno could hear the skull's confusion. What datapad?
I picked it up in the ruins just before I met you. It's some records about this place. Hopefully I can pick up some information on just what the Viahtaa does. Then I can make a choice about whether to leave it in the queen's hands, or to take it back and make that reporter take me off planet before something bad happens.
Yuuno pulled the datapad out of his satchel. It was kind of nice that they let him keep his things, but then, everyone but the Bishop apparently knew that this arrest was fake and he'd be out in the morning anyway. He stared at it for a moment, trying to plot his next steps carefully.
What's the hold up, Yuuno?
Well, Yuuno explained to his skull, inside his skull, this thing has a nearly depleted power supply. I'll only have a few minutes to get any data from it before it runs out, and I can't replicate the power source.
Well, it's got a wireless connection, why don't you just use that?
Because I don't have any of the proper in... ter... faces. Yuuno paused for a long, long moment. Jed, can you read this thing?
Well, the unison device hedged, not with it turned off, I can't. But I think I can just copy the whole thing through the port once it's on.
Alright, Yuuno allowed, it can't be any worse than it is now, I guess. Get ready. I'm going to turn it on.
Fitting action to words, Yuuno flipped the device on and started flitting through the menu system, his knowledge of the rudiments of the Al-Hazzard system of writing serving him well enough for the moment as he tried his own method just in case.
Done, came the skull's smug voice as it completely outclassed him.
Yuuno blinked, but instantly shut the pad off, putting it back in the bag. Great. Can you put it up on screen for me?
There was a long moment of silence, nothing happening. After a full minute, Yuuno tried again. Jed?
The black burning green skull popped out of his chest then, and floated a few feet off. ôPlease excuse me for a moment.ö The skull zipped through the bars and down into the dungeon away from Yuuno's cell and the stairs.
Yuuno blinked as the echos bounced off the walls, not simply limiting itself to a single word as before. The epithets moving through the halls were insulting the parentage, sexuality, species, and intelligence of... someone or something, Yuuno couldn't tell what, and it only went downhill from there.
After a full ten minutes of shouted cursed bouncing around the dungeon, Jed zipped back into Yuuno's cell and into his body. None too soon as well, as the next thing he knew, several guards came from the direction of the stairs.
They passed right by him, noting only that he was bewildered and locked up before moving on. Several minutes later, the trooped by again. They gave him a better look over this time, but still left without trouble, given that Yuuno had had the presence of mind to hide his bag. Only after they were gone did Jed speak, zipping out of Yuuno's body and settling down on the windowsill.
ôHow bad is it?ö Yuuno's voice was very quiet.
ôWorse than we could have possibly imagined.ö Jed's voice was just as quiet, but held a grim, scared sort of tone. ôI'm both very glad that Al-Hazzard's civilization collapsed, and disappointed that I can't tear into one of them.ö
Yuuno closed his eyes. Huh. Jed seems to be taking this a bit personally. I... No. He couldn't dodge the issue with pointless questions, not if he was going to stop a disaster. ôWhat are we dealing with here?ö
The skull was silent for a moment. ôOkay. Think cock fighting, but on a planetary scale.ö
ôWhat?!ö Yuuno's mind boggled at the implications.
ôYeah. That datapad was a cop's. Killed here while on investigation into a crime ring. Basically these really right guys from Al-Hazzard would purchase, develop, steal, or whatever to get their hands on some decently powerful - for them - but easily used artifacts. Then they'd seed them on a developing planet and let the locals use them for miracles or whatnot. Then, once a planet reached a certain stage, they'd pit one of their empowered civilizations against each other. Just to see who wins. Plus the betting and whatnot.ö
ôThey developed entire civilizations just to fight them against each other? Why? For that matter, how?ö Yuuno's mind shrunk back from the kind of twisted evil it would take to do that sort of thing.
The skull floated a bit in a shrugging motion. ôWhy do the rich and twisted do anything? Because it amuses them. As for how... well, with the kinds of technology they had, it wouldn't surprise me if they were the next best thing to immortal, or maybe they used some time magic to speed things up, maybe both. The point is that it happened.ö The skull's eyes flashed. ôBelieve me. I'd really like to rip into one of them.ö Then he sighed. ôBut I imagine that they all died with their civilization. Anyway, win or loose, after the match, everything is razed, and both sides start from scratch, win or lose. But the thing is, that the rich are easily bored. They had systems in place to do the micro managing for them, even automatically scheduling periodic matches for them.ö
Yuuno's eyes widened. ôSo you're saying that some of these cultures are still doing this, even so long after Al-Hazzard disappeared?ö
The skull nodded, its eyes darkening. ôYeah. In some places the system has broken down somewhat, but it was designed to be as self-sufficient as possible so as to be able to deny any involvement in a worst case scenario.ö
Yuuno rubbed at his eyes for a moment. ôOkay, lay it on me. What kind of trouble is the Viahtaa going to give us if it activates?ö
ôWell, it's not like we don't have time. I mean, what are the odds that we're here at the right time?ö The skull was babbling a bit.
ôJed!ö
Jed told him. Yuuno didn't get much sleep that night.
---
There we go. Needed more mindfuck.
Hopefully this will be better.
---
ôSo how long am I going to be held for?ö
Captain Sjalett shrugged as the two worked their way through the lower levels of the palace, otherwise known as the dungeon. ôI wouldn't think that it will be more than overnight. I doubt the Bishop can bring any charges to bear that her majesty cannot dismiss out of hand. Still the Hellig are powerfull, and it would not do to too heavily incur their wrath. Thus, you may be here for the full day before being released.ö
Yuuno nodded. It seemed reasonable - or at least as reasonable as things were going to get for the moment. A day to himself, behind bars or not, would give him some time to think. But more information was in order before he made any sort of decision. ôWhy is the church so powerful, anyway? The people I've seen don't seem overly religious.ö
Akta shook her head, a red curl peeking out from under her head-wrap for a moment. ôThe Azulians hold their religion close to their hearts. There is no need for them to display religious fervor when they are true believers surrounded by true believers. Their religion is as self evident as the cycle of the sun and the moon. It is there and omnipresent; there is no need to draw excessive attention to it.ö
Yuuno arched a brow. ô'The Azulians'?ö
There was an amused crinkle in her eye. ôI, too, am a foreigner, though perhaps not as foreign as yourself. I hail from Artania, one of the largest continuous landmasses on the planet. This,ö she touched her head wrap, ôis an affection of my homeland. Removing it, while not forbidden, would be considered... vulgar.ö
Yuuno nodded thoughtfully. Under most circumstances he would be fascinated by continuing along this line of thought (Cultural variation, not vulgarity!), but here and now other concerns were more pressing.
When Yuuno sheepishly pointed this out, the redhead laughed. ôIndeed. I do not believe the Hellig will let this go either.ö She frowned. ôYou may have noticed - in fact it is impossible not to notice - that this country shares the same name as the planet itself. This is not something that sits well with the other countries here.ö
ôI imagine it seems pretty arrogant to them,ö Yuuno murmured as they started down a flight of steps.
ôYes. There have been many attempts to subjugate Azulia. Each and every one of them has been repelled, but not by Azulia's standing army.ö
ôThe Hellig repel them?ö Yuuno's eyes bugged out a bit, before he frowned, trying to block out their newly barred surroundings. ôHow? They seem to have some competent warriors and mages, but nothing insurmountable.ö
She shook her head, before selecting a cell and opening it, gesturing for him to enter. ôThe Hellig are capable of miracles on a grand scale. The last time an invader sent a fleet against Azulia, it was destroyed before coming in sight of shore by a massive column of energy from the heavens. They spoke of it as a 'miracle of Lider'.ö
Or possibly a starship's main gun, Yuuno thought grimly as she locked the cell door behind him, given what Ranma had to say. ôI'm surprised they're not in total control then,ö was all he said aloud, however.
Akta shrugged as she leaned against the bars. ôIt is as her majesty said earlier. The Hellig have proven notoriously inept at running a country. It has happened a few times in Azulia's history, the church usurping the throne's power, but always they expect the people to work for them without pay, just as in their devotions. If the people are forced to work, they rebel, if they are not, the Hellig are forced back into their role for lack of finances.ö
Yuuno considered this. ôSo they always fail at running things because they can't make a distinction between the secular and ecclesiastical duties.ö
The guard captain made a noise of agreement, and they stayed as they were on opposite sides of the bars for a few minutes, Yuuno look up through the barred, high set window well for a while. Finally Yuuno asked another question. ôYou were talking earlier about your home country?ö
She laughed again. ôYou truly wish to know?ö
Yuuno shrugged. ôAt its core, archeology is about understanding other cultures, it's just the how that's different from most anything else.ö
Akta pulled forward from her position along the bars, then stretched her leg out of sight to pull a stool over with her foot, which she promptly say upon. ôVery well. I suppose I could tell you a few things. Firstly, the church is very different. Rather than being centered around worship of anything specific, it's centered around defense. Artanian priests would always tell us that the moon is the harbringer of our doom. 'When the moon reflects Azulia, there shall be a plague of beasts throughout the land', and 'the moon shall destroy all it turns its gaze upon'.ö
ôHeh.ö In prison or not, Yuuno was now in his element. The next few hours passed in conversation, before his company excused herself to go catch some sleep before her next shift. Finally, though, he was all alone in his cell.
Hey, did you know that if I manipulate my visual inputs just right, I can see right through most clothing?
Okay, maybe not as alone as he'd probably like to be. Is that why you were so quiet?
Duh, Jed sent out, I mean, it wasn't perfect... Transparent or not, her armor still prevented any jiggle from showing, but...
Yuuno sighed at the obvious resonse. Ugh. Whatever. Let's just get some work done.
So we're going to bust out of here and join the lovely Captain Sjalett to unwrap more than just her headscarf?
No, Yuuno replied, ignoring that, we're going to get some work done on the datapad.
Er... Yuuno could hear the skull's confusion. What datapad?
I picked it up in the ruins just before I met you. It's some records about this place. Hopefully I can pick up some information on just what the Viahtaa does. Then I can make a choice about whether to leave it in the queen's hands, or to take it back and make that reporter take me off planet before something bad happens.
Yuuno pulled the datapad out of his satchel. It was kind of nice that they let him keep his things, but then, everyone but the Bishop apparently knew that this arrest was fake and he'd be out in the morning anyway. He stared at it for a moment, trying to plot his next steps carefully.
What's the hold up, Yuuno?
Well, Yuuno explained to his skull, inside his skull, this thing has a nearly depleted power supply. I'll only have a few minutes to get any data from it before it runs out, and I can't replicate the power source.
Well, it's got a wireless connection, why don't you just use that?
Because I don't have any of the proper in... ter... faces. Yuuno paused for a long, long moment. Jed, can you read this thing?
Well, the unison device hedged, not with it turned off, I can't. But I think I can just copy the whole thing through the port once it's on.
Alright, Yuuno allowed, it can't be any worse than it is now, I guess. Get ready. I'm going to turn it on.
Fitting action to words, Yuuno flipped the device on and started flitting through the menu system, his knowledge of the rudiments of the Al-Hazzard system of writing serving him well enough for the moment as he tried his own method just in case.
Done, came the skull's smug voice as it completely outclassed him.
Yuuno blinked, but instantly shut the pad off, putting it back in the bag. Great. Can you put it up on screen for me?
There was a long moment of silence, nothing happening. After a full minute, Yuuno tried again. Jed?
The black burning green skull popped out of his chest then, and floated a few feet off. ôPlease excuse me for a moment.ö The skull zipped through the bars and down into the dungeon away from Yuuno's cell and the stairs.
Yuuno blinked as the echos bounced off the walls, not simply limiting itself to a single word as before. The epithets moving through the halls were insulting the parentage, sexuality, species, and intelligence of... someone or something, Yuuno couldn't tell what, and it only went downhill from there.
After a full ten minutes of shouted cursed bouncing around the dungeon, Jed zipped back into Yuuno's cell and into his body. None too soon as well, as the next thing he knew, several guards came from the direction of the stairs.
They passed right by him, noting only that he was bewildered and locked up before moving on. Several minutes later, the trooped by again. They gave him a better look over this time, but still left without trouble, given that Yuuno had had the presence of mind to hide his bag. Only after they were gone did Jed speak, zipping out of Yuuno's body and settling down on the windowsill.
ôHow bad is it?ö Yuuno's voice was very quiet.
ôWorse than we could have possibly imagined.ö Jed's voice was just as quiet, but held a grim, scared sort of tone. ôI'm both very glad that Al-Hazzard's civilization collapsed, and disappointed that I can't tear into one of them.ö
Yuuno closed his eyes. Huh. Jed seems to be taking this a bit personally. I... No. He couldn't dodge the issue with pointless questions, not if he was going to stop a disaster. ôWhat are we dealing with here?ö
The skull was silent for a moment. ôOkay. Think cock fighting, but on a planetary scale.ö
ôWhat?!ö Yuuno's mind boggled at the implications.
ôYeah. That datapad was a cop's. Killed here while on investigation into a crime ring. Basically these really right guys from Al-Hazzard would purchase, develop, steal, or whatever to get their hands on some decently powerful - for them - but easily used artifacts. Then they'd seed them on a developing planet and let the locals use them for miracles or whatnot. Then, once a planet reached a certain stage, they'd pit one of their empowered civilizations against each other. Just to see who wins. Plus the betting and whatnot.ö
ôThey developed entire civilizations just to fight them against each other? Why? For that matter, how?ö Yuuno's mind shrunk back from the kind of twisted evil it would take to do that sort of thing.
The skull floated a bit in a shrugging motion. ôWhy do the rich and twisted do anything? Because it amuses them. As for how... well, with the kinds of technology they had, it wouldn't surprise me if they were the next best thing to immortal, or maybe they used some time magic to speed things up, maybe both. The point is that it happened.ö The skull's eyes flashed. ôBelieve me. I'd really like to rip into one of them.ö Then he sighed. ôBut I imagine that they all died with their civilization. Anyway, win or loose, after the match, everything is razed, and both sides start from scratch, win or lose. But the thing is, that the rich are easily bored. They had systems in place to do the micro managing for them, even automatically scheduling periodic matches for them.ö
Yuuno's eyes widened. ôSo you're saying that some of these cultures are still doing this, even so long after Al-Hazzard disappeared?ö
The skull nodded, its eyes darkening. ôYeah. In some places the system has broken down somewhat, but it was designed to be as self-sufficient as possible so as to be able to deny any involvement in a worst case scenario.ö
Yuuno rubbed at his eyes for a moment. ôOkay, lay it on me. What kind of trouble is the Viahtaa going to give us if it activates?ö
ôWell, it's not like we don't have time. I mean, what are the odds that we're here at the right time?ö The skull was babbling a bit.
ôJed!ö
Jed told him. Yuuno didn't get much sleep that night.
---
There we go. Needed more mindfuck.
Or the Wraith, the Ori, the Replicators, when connected to black hole, when destabilizing a star to cause a supernova, when used in conjunction with other Ancient devices to fuck over your planet-genisis device and time loop device, you know that thing really isn't that nice at all. Although that could be more a problem with the universe being filled with asshats. :huh.:
Anyways if one follows the directions on using the True Grail it seems to work alright.
Anyways if one follows the directions on using the True Grail it seems to work alright.
Hmmm... good or potentially ancient artifacts (remember, even good items can be used for evil)...
- The spear of Osiris
- Atlantis itself as shown in StarGate Atlantis
- Library of Alexandria in SeaQuest
- The robot in Tenchi GXP
- The Jumpgate network and the Great Machine in Babylon 5
- The Guardian of Forever in Star Trek TOS
- Ifurita in El Hazard
- The Yamato in Star Blazers/Space Battleship Yamato
- The spear of Osiris
- Atlantis itself as shown in StarGate Atlantis
- Library of Alexandria in SeaQuest
- The robot in Tenchi GXP
- The Jumpgate network and the Great Machine in Babylon 5
- The Guardian of Forever in Star Trek TOS
- Ifurita in El Hazard
- The Yamato in Star Blazers/Space Battleship Yamato
Artifacts don't have to be special. Most are mundane items. The shiny things just get better press.
Say in the far, far, future, an archaeologist finds the remains of my metallic fan. That would still be classified an ancient artifact.
Plus archeologists would be happy to find anything at all. Especially stuff like ancient toilet paper and mops because trash is really important in drawing new conclusions.
Say in the far, far, future, an archaeologist finds the remains of my metallic fan. That would still be classified an ancient artifact.
Plus archeologists would be happy to find anything at all. Especially stuff like ancient toilet paper and mops because trash is really important in drawing new conclusions.
Sorry to give people false hopes, but this needs to be said: the last two snippets dropped some MAJOR bombs as far as this planet's background goes.
First, we have Jedite present as Bob the Skull. Hokay, pretty cool stuff, but nothing major, right?
Second, it's been confirmed by Jed and Yuuno that, somehow, time travel has been involved. That explains how Yuuno spent a week in the pocket dimension when, in reality, only a few hours had passed.
Nothing new so far, right? So, let's go to the third's snippet.
Two things to notice: first, the Enemy consists of a leader and it's eight demons, who destroyed Azulia's way of life. Second, the indicator of Ranma and Yuuno being agents of the Enemy is their names. Ranma's name, as we know, is Japanese, and Yuuno's first name at least SOUNDS Japanese.
Then, the fifth's.
Read that again: the moon is the harbringer.
The MOON.
... So, let's go back to the first two points. We know Jedite the Skull is Jedite after Sailor Moon ripped him a new one, and we know that time travel is involved, what with the sneeze take showing that he's making plans for the invasion. However, just WHY is Jedite in a dimensional pocket located on that specific planet? The presence of space travel and the church's stance on defense could be tied to Al Hazard's history of intergalatic cockfights, but why such a focus on the moon (which, interestingly enough, is the only non-blue thing on the planet)? Why the focus of strange animal familiars? WHY SO SERIOUS?
... Ahem. Anyways, so, I guess what I'm getting at are these two things: first, the entire planet is what remains of Beryl's kingdom, after they are destroyed by Sailor Moon; second, NeverCM is a subtle little SOB.
First, we have Jedite present as Bob the Skull. Hokay, pretty cool stuff, but nothing major, right?
Second, it's been confirmed by Jed and Yuuno that, somehow, time travel has been involved. That explains how Yuuno spent a week in the pocket dimension when, in reality, only a few hours had passed.
Nothing new so far, right? So, let's go to the third's snippet.
Two things to notice: first, the Enemy consists of a leader and it's eight demons, who destroyed Azulia's way of life. Second, the indicator of Ranma and Yuuno being agents of the Enemy is their names. Ranma's name, as we know, is Japanese, and Yuuno's first name at least SOUNDS Japanese.
Then, the fifth's.
Read that again: the moon is the harbringer.
The MOON.
... So, let's go back to the first two points. We know Jedite the Skull is Jedite after Sailor Moon ripped him a new one, and we know that time travel is involved, what with the sneeze take showing that he's making plans for the invasion. However, just WHY is Jedite in a dimensional pocket located on that specific planet? The presence of space travel and the church's stance on defense could be tied to Al Hazard's history of intergalatic cockfights, but why such a focus on the moon (which, interestingly enough, is the only non-blue thing on the planet)? Why the focus of strange animal familiars? WHY SO SERIOUS?
... Ahem. Anyways, so, I guess what I'm getting at are these two things: first, the entire planet is what remains of Beryl's kingdom, after they are destroyed by Sailor Moon; second, NeverCM is a subtle little SOB.