Iron Fic 4-2


Staff member
Iron Fic 4-2: Vendetta!

Some people we find simply unconscionable.? Whether it's their ignorance of social mores, insults directed at you and yours or them committing a crime against you that you cannot forgive, sometimes hatred is the only response to someone.? In these situations, declare vendetta and do everything you can to take them down.

This is a challenge about hatred, about revenge, about striking first and about destruction.? Your subject need not be just or fair, but driven by spite, pettiness, cruelty or pride.? Write about the formation of the vendetta or the results thereof, think about why one person might have it out for another and what those around them think.

Keywords are revenge and single-minded.? The challenge is made!


The Ero-Sennin

The Eyes of Heaven
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<a href='' target='_blank' rel='nofollow'>Proportionate Retribution</a>


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It's what happens when I need sleep more than I want to ficc... y'know.


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Today is a dark day for the Biigoh desired slumber which came more than tyings ^_^;

Writing proficiency: 20

Writting a Ranma fic is like a pizza, it is a classic. With a multitute of ways to combine the incredients. But like any pizza, proper asembly is needed. And thus, I give this a 20 for writing proficiency, no obvious errors.

Use of the theme: 19

The theme is vendetta, thus I would have to say you went with the simple route of Akane's vendetta, it fits just like pineapple fits with ham. Akane here did held a vendetta, it is hardly 'appropiate' given that the scenes she references were ones where she WANTED power and denied that people wanted to help her and cure her as she went on a rampage. No mention of the whiskers that Akane got that Ranma tried to save her from. Or that Akane kept going with the "IF you hit me, I'll NEVER forgive you" and then attack Ranma... hardly 'fair'. ne?

Depth: 15

I would say that while this fic holds a certain depth, it is in the end no deeper than a deep pan pizza.

Story: 17

The material works, the theme works, the story, however must also be included. And here it's elegant in its one shot and wouldn't have been out of place in the heydays of the FFML.

Other: 16

While enjoying, I must admit to some detraction to the style of the fic and its outcome... This is like having a nice ham and pineapple pizza, but finding Anchovies in it.

Total: 87


Well-Known Member
Vengeance undeserved. If this wasn't the only entry, an obvious sign of a flawed system, I ask for a recount.