random1377 said:
Look up AAmishi on ffnet.? He has a Sakaki/ACC that's not half bad.
Mor leik "Sakaki/SI" am i rite
Rule of thumb: don't tell the people your character is curteous always etc. etc. etc.; instead, show it. By his actions.
I think I mentally tuned out ("oh no not again") around the part where he sort of but didn't talk back to Teacher Yukari.
Oh, and I think the twitching started when a bunch of different club members tried to get him to join their clubs. In an orderly fashion. On pretty much his first day at the school. See, this is how I know whether a fanfic is good or bad. If the vein on the right side of my neck starts popping out while the right half of my face tries to curl upwards, it's bad. And not just mediocre-bad, but pretty-not-good-bad.
(Wait, kittens in a mountain biking magazine? Don't they choose what ads to put in magazines based on the type of person most likely to read said magazine? Or did I miss something? I sort of couldn't stand it anymore, so my eyes sort of started skipping words, in a vain effort to block out the terrible terrible terrible--)
(But this is a fanfic that was started two years ago, right? It's been updated relatively recently. I must go on! In case--in case it begin to somehow resemble some not-as-terrible!)
Calling her chan after about two days of school spent sort-of-but-not-together. TWITCHITY TWITCHITY TWITCHITY TWITCH. And is it just me, or does this guy talk too...refined for a student? Compare: "Walking to school takes me past this way each day, but I must admit, I didnÆt know you lived her until I saw you right now." and "No, I, uh, didn't know you lived here, actually. This street's on my normal route." Really, the guy's blatantly...well, he's blatantly something, all right.
It starts to get sort of kind of better by the time they've built up a relationship--but it's the start of the story that's important, sort of, you know? A regular man cannot stand on a foundation of SI-ness, for it shall collapse with terrible ear-wrecking crumbly sounds! Kind of like that story in the Bible about the guy who built his house on rock and the other guy who built his house on sand. I won't tell you if it's rock or sand that represents SI-ness, but it's not rock.
P.S. Lumias: Yeah, sure, which is evidence against more yuri, if you think about it. Sure, two of the Scouts just happen to be lesbians, who are with each other. Fine. I can accept that. But what's the odds that not only are they, but so are two
other members of their group?