Incoming wall-o-text!
Yukari's jaw stretched into a yawn as she pushed herself up to her feet from the cold, dusty floor of the grounds keeper's shed.
Rubbing her eyes with the back of her hand, she groped blindly for her magic wand, which was laying next to the cloud-like mattress she had summoned the previous day to rest on.
When she found her wand, she gave the "mattress" a sharp tap, causing it to contract and shrivel instantly. In a few seconds it vanished into a pinprick of light, and Yukari went about getting dressed. She found her hat resting upon a thick spread of spider webs hanging over her sleeping space, and she had to stand on her tip-toes in order to reach it (as well as shake it out to get rid of the spiders that had crawled inside).
After she was finished, she put on her cape and walked to the exit, stepping over a few of Tobaki's tendrils that were spread across the shed interior.
Once outside, Yukari glanced around to check on the boys. Tsukune was still asleep, with Kurumu curled up against his side in a way that would have seemed terribly romantic if she didn't know that the succubus had snuck in next to him last night. Chopper was splayed out on the ground next to the shed in his monster form, a puddle of drool having collected under his head.
The only person both present and awake was Kouma, which came as a slight surprise to Yukari since she hadn't seen him since he had dashed off after Oyakata. The hellhound was sitting cross-legged next to the fire pit, brooding silently and looking generally discontented as usual.
Not seeing anyone else, and not having any particular reason to talk to Kouma, Yukari turned away and headed toward the stream where they had been getting their water.
Hr
"I told you that you couldn't do it. The abilities of the vampire aren't parlor tricks any given brute can pick up with practice. They're innate and unique powers."
"Oh, give it a rest, EM. I've been trying for less than a day. I'll get the hang of it."
As Yukari reached the stream, she was treated to the rather novel sight of Ranma and Moka conversing peaceably, and without anyone else around. Moka was in her Evil form and seated cross-legged atop a boulder next to the stream, while Ranma was in his girl form, probably because she was floating in the stream while nursing several bruises and abrasions.
"'Get the hang of it'? Are you just stupid, or actually deaf? You CAN'T 'get the hang' of my powers! You may as well try to 'learn' Gamaroshi's fire breath or Keito's thread spinning! You can't learn my powers!" Evil Moka snapped, her hands gripping her knees tightly as if to keep them from gravitating toward Ranma's throat again.
Ranma rolled her eyes. "Your 'powers' consist of kicking really hard, turning into a violent, stuck-up maniac, and biting people. I've seen non-vampires manage all three, so you're not really anything special."
CRACK! The boulder under Evil Moka shifted slightly as a deep seam suddenly broke through the stone, all without any apparent effort on the part of the vampiress as she glared evenly at Ranma.
The martial artist quirked an eyebrow. "What? You wanna add that to your list of powers? Because I know a human who can break rocks while barely touching them too. No biggie."
"I DESPISE you," Evil Moka growled through clenched teeth.
"Yeah, whatever," Ranma mumbled, standing up in the water as she waved to Yukari, "hey, squirt! Over here!"
Yukari grinned as she approached the stream, her hands clasped behind her back. "Well, it seems like you two are getting along!"
"And how did you reach that conclusion?" Evil Moka demanded, still glaring firmly at Ranma.
"Well, neither of you are punching the other! That's a HUGE improvement over the last two times!" the young witch chirped.
Moka clicked her tongue. "She's all wet. If I hit her now, I might get wet too."
Ranma chuckled as she scooped up some water in her palms and held it up. "Awwww, is da widdle bwoodsucker scawed of da water? Is da water gonna get you? Is dat it?"
Multiple veins popped up on Moka's head, and her fangs almost seemed to grow larger and more prominent as she clenched her teeth. "Splash me with that, and Tsukune, Richard, and all the water in the world won't be able to save you from me!"
"Yeesh, no sense of humor at all. No wonder everyone keeps you locked up in your own head most of the time," letting the water fall back into the stream, Ranma gave her full attention to Yukari, "so did you wanna talk to me, or EM?"
"Do NOT refer to me as 'Ee Em'!" Evil Moka snarled. "You don't need to call me anything different, I KNOW who you're referring to!"
"Don't mind her. She's just cranky because she didn't have any coffin time yesterday," Ranma said, rolling her eyes.
"I don't HAVE a coffin! That's just an old stereotype!"
"I was actually here to wash up, but since you're here, Senpai, I was wondering about your trip back home!" The young witch crouched down next to the stream, her eyes sparkling.
Ranma's expression soured immediately. "It... could have gone better. Not many people seemed happy to see me."
"What a shock," Evil Moka deadpanned, resting her cheek against her fist, "you mean humans don't LIKE annoying, self-absorbed brutes?"
"Not as much as monsters do, I guess," Ranma admitted, "also, get bent."
"What's your home like?" Yukari asked, tilting her head to one side.
"It looks pretty normal, I guess. Normal for humans, anyway. But the people are kind of nutty. All sorts of crazy martial artists run through there causing trouble."
Ranma fell silent for several seconds, and then glanced over at Evil Moka. "Well?"
"Too easy. Keep going," the vampiress mumbled, looking bored.
"It's especially dangerous for witches, apparently. I was only there a short time, but I ran into this crazy foreign jerk hunting them down," Ranma continued.
"A witch hunter? That's outrageous!" Yukari said, instantly furious at the prospect. "How could someone do something so awful?"
"Yeah, I thought it was pretty messed up too," Ranma said, crossing her arms under her breasts, "he said it was because of witches always tormenting and killing humans and stuff."
Yukari recoiled. "What? That's ridicu..."
She trailed off as she noticed a dead gari-gari plant lying next to the stream, and suddenly she recalled the source of most of the fighting the previous day.
"Oh. Right. Well, it's still bad to assume we're ALL genocidal villains," Yukari muttered.
"That's what I told him, but the guy didn't want to hear it," Ranma said, shrugging, "though to be fair, it's really hard to defend the old ghoul."
"So you hang out with ghouls at home? And you wonder why nobody believes you're human?" Evil Moka interjected.
"No, she's not actually a ghoul," Ranma said, rolling her eyes, "she's just... well, she's a witch, but she said that witches are actually humans, or that they're not different enough to count, or something like that," she explained, getting a suspicious look from Yukari.
Evil Moka shrugged. "In a way, so are ghouls."
"WHAT?! Seriously?" Ranma demanded. "Come on, people, choose a species already!"
"Let's talk about something else," Yukari said awkwardly, taking up a fully seated position on the bank, "what are we going to do with the time we have left on the knoll?"
"Training, obviously," Ranma said, smiling, "I guess you guys got some fighting in on your own, but since we still have time, I wanna see the Compliance Squad through some REAL challenges!"
"The Compliance Squad? So, just Kurumu, Kouma and Chopper?" Yukari asked, her gaze not quite meeting Ranma's face.
"Yeah, well, I'm not sure how helpful martial arts training would be to you, Kana, or Mizore, never mind Tsukune." Then she turned her head. "Hey, EM, you want in?"
"Will I get another opportunity to maul you?" Evil Moka asked blithely.
"Maybe, but you'll have to wait your turn."
"Meh. I'll probably change back then," Evil Moka said, looking bored.
"There you go," Ranma said with a shrug, turning back to Yukari, "you can come if you want, and I can show you some exercises or something, but it's not going to help with the hocus-pocus."
There was a brief moment of silence before Ranma spoke up again.
"Yukari, my eyes are up here."
"Yeah, I'm listening," Yukari said, her eyes still locked onto Ranma's breasts. Ranma's shirt was completely soaked, and she was not wearing a bra, as usual. "So what about Tobaki and Keito?"
Ranma rolled her eyes and started climbing out onto dry land. "There are a few things I could teach them, I guess, but I don't really want to. I kind of feel like them getting stronger would just make it more dangerous for the rest of us."
"But you just offered to train Evil Moka," Yukari pointed out.
"And why would you put me in the same boat as the spider-related malcontents?" Evil Moka demanded, her eyebrow arching.
"Yeah, they're not really on the same level," Ranma agreed as she cracked her neck, "Tobaki and Keito aren't weak against freaking WATER."
Before Yukari knew what happening, Evil Moka was airborne, her leg cutting through the air with the strength to shatter steel.
Air was all she cut through, however. Ranma had already ducked to avoid the blow, figuring out the vampire's most likely angle of attack ahead of time.
"Fell for it!" Ranma shouted, spinning on her heel as a surprised Evil Moka landed behind her.
"Have a taste of your own medicine, bloodsucker!" Ranma shouted, grinning as she leapt into a roundhouse kick of her own.
Yukari's eyes widened as she watched the redhead's leg cut a blazing blue arc through the air, Ranma's aura burning brightly as her foot slammed into Moka's shoulder. A loud crack followed a shock wave through the air from the impact, and the young witch's sight was briefly obscured by water splashing against a rock on the edge of the stream and leaping up in front of her.
When the water dropped back to whence it came, however, Yukari was honestly kind of disappointed.
Not that she wanted to see Moka hurt, even in her haughty and relatively homicidal form, but the vampiress was simply standing in place, looking unimpressed as she clutched Ranma's shin in one hand.
"You're doing it wrong," Evil Moka deadpanned.
"Tch! I was sure I had it that time!" Ranma complained. "Is my energy balance off?"
"No, your balance is perfect," Evil Moka admitted, "it's more subtle than that. Once your heel leaves the ground, but before you complete your rotation, it's vital that you make sure to BE A VAMPIRE."
"That is so unhelpful," Ranma complained, crossing her arms under her breasts even while she still had her leg extended over Moka's shoulder.
In response, the vampiress casually flung Ranma over her shoulder, as if she was discarding a piece of trash (and had anyone asked her, she would have considered the comparison more than apt).
Ranma landed on her feet, and then stuck her tongue out at Evil Moka.
"Whatever. I have to go turn back into a guy now. Later!"
Hr
More or less at the same time, Tsukune had staggered to consciousness as well, and had wandered into the sunflower fields to relieve himself.
His body still ached considerably from the previous day, and he moved sluggishly as he swatted aside the large flowers. Almost all of the foliage was wilted and brown, and the ground was muddy and littered with dead leaves. The sudden snowstorm had utterly destroyed the fields, although the snow itself had long melted away. Broken sunflower stalks were everwhere, and he could even see a hanabake corpse lying in the mud, half-buried with its arms outstretched as if it had been trying to claw its way to safety before it froze to death.
"And to think a city might have died to keep this place from becoming a garbage heap," Tsukune mumbled as he finished his business and zipped up his pants, "a junk yard would actually be an improvement at this point."
Shaking his head, Tsukune turned around to go back to camp.
He was rather surprised and more than a little disturbed tro see Kouma standing behind him, waiting with a bemused expression on his face.
"Did... Did you just watch me pee?" Tsukune asked, making a face.
"No!" Kouma snapped immediately. Then he winced slightly. "Well... okay, yes, technically, but that's not why I'm here."
"I'd hope not. When did you get back, Kouma? Last time I saw you, you were chasing down that older wirtch."
Kouma's eyes lowered, and the hellhound stared at the ground awkwardly, which surprised Tsukune. He didn't know Kouma all that well, but he had never witnessed the hellhound look nervous.
"Yeah, uh... She's gone, Captain," Kouma mumbled, still not making eye contact, "so what happened after that? I heard there was some other fight?"
"The old Enforcers ambushed us," Tsukune said, looking grim, "it was very well-planned, and I'm really surprised they managed to pull it off as well as they did. But we managed to come through and turn the tables on them. Even now, they're probably being dragged before the Headmaster and being made to answer for their actions."
Kouma raised an eyebrow. "Really? You even arrested them rather than just killing all of them?"
Tsukune nodded. "Yes. Luckily, or rather, suspiciously, the bus driver arrived just in time to ship them out to their judgment and punishment back at Youkai Academy! We won't hear from them again!"
Hr
"And so you, Kuyo, Jin, Volos, Haruo, and Kishia, are hereby charged with assaulting members of the Protection Committee, class six weather manipulation in human territory, leaving the school's dimensional pocket without a supervisory authority, and attempted murder, emphasis on 'attempted'. Seriously, it's underlined like three times on here."
The Headmaster looked up from the paper slip on his desk, his hooded eye staring down at the students arranged below.
Kuyo, who had the top of his head wrapped liberally in bandages, stood at the front of the group of accused students, all of them surrounded by the Headmaster's bodyguards.
"I deny all wrongdoing," Kuyo said immediately, crossing his arms over his chest, "this is a smear campaign orchestrated by Aono to discredit me and suppress criticism of his own Committee!"
It looked like the Headmaster was about to speak again, but before he could, Kuyo suddenly shouted, "Damn that human worm! I almost had him! And to think that now, I, Kuyo, should have to suffer the indignity of being judged by this buffoon! They will PAY for this! THEY WILL ALL PAY!"
Silence reigned in the Headmaster's office as he the school's top administrator stared at the yoko.
"Sorry about that. Kuyo suffered some serious concussions yesterday," Volos explained nervously.
"Nurse Madaraki said that his brain is automatically translating his thoughts into speech now, without him even realizing it. But it's temporary... probably," mumbled Jin with a slight slur. The yeti was wearing a full body cast, with wires supporting his joints as he sat in a reinforced wheelchair.
"I see. Well then, I'll just ignore what he says for now," the Headmaster said with a smirk, clasping his hands together.
"I heard the Headmaster is good with barriers," Kuyo said angrily, "I wonder if he has one up now. A single fire bolt to the face, and we could be out of here scott-free in time for lunch."
The other former Enforcers shifted uncomfortably as the Headmaster coughed into his fist.
"Although I would take you at your word normally since none of the witnesses are here to contradict you, there is ONE piece of evidence of your unacceptable conduct that actually made it here along with your battered, useless bodies."
"WHAT? What is it? Who is it? I'll incinerate them where they stand!" Kuyo raged, a fiery tail emerging behind him as Volos and Haruo stepped away from their leader.
The Headmaster raised a single sheet of paper. "This complaint, written up by Professor Richard, that the lot of you tried to murder the Protection Committee and didn't invite him to help even after he showed up. In fact, he seems to think you deliberately avoided getting him involved in your fight."
"I wonder what Professor Richard looks like under his cowl," Kuyo said, his tail slowly shrinking to nothing as his thoughts wandered, "I'll bet he wears ghoul makeup, and only wears the mask so that he doesn't have to apply it to his whole face everyday."
Jin cleared his throat, inflicting no small amount of pain upon himself in order to get the Headmaster's attention.
"Why did Professor Richard submit a formal complaint? He clearly doesn't care about our alleged crime, and neglecting him isn't against any rules," Jin pointed out.
"Oh, it's not a formal complaint. We're just pen pals," the administrator said, his grin seeming to stretch wider.
As the accused students groaned, the Headmaster's smile faded slightly. "As such, I find you guilty of all charges, I'm afraid."
"Hey, not to seem petty and all, but where are those other chumps? We're a bit low on headcount, here!" Volos complained.
"Hey, yeah! What about the pumpkin-headed guy and his friends?" Haruo demanded. "Maybe the holy dragon can get out of punishment because he's dead, but the others are just as guilty as us!"
"That skeletal dragon's head would look awesome mounted over a fireplace," Kuyo noted absently.
The Headmaster shook his head. "I am aware that you were brought in alongside two and one-tenth Netherworld monsters, but they were released on a technicality."
"What technicality?" Jin asked eagerly, doing his best to lean forward in his wheelchair.
The Headmaster shrugged. "Nobody knows their names, so we can't match them to their student records."
Once again, the old Enforcers groaned miserably before the Headmaster continued. "So, as I was saying, you will bear the full burden of your malicious shenanigans."
"Malicious Shenanigans would be a fine name for a rock band," Kuyo noted, looking quite upset at the verdict.
"As such, I sentence all of you to write 'I will not try to murder the Protection Committee' on the blackboard one hundred times," the Headmaster said, his grin morphing into a mocking sneer.
Silence dominated the room for several seconds, as even Kuyo was too confused to think coherently.
"You mean, like, a hundred times EACH?" Volos said, looking worried as his lazy personality asserted itself.
"No, that would be a hassle and take up too much space," the Headmaster said, waving a hand, "a hundred times for the lot of you should do it."
"HA! I'll just have my extremely dull and submissive lackeyes write it all!" Kuyo said, barking a laugh.
The rest of the assembled group looked annoyed at this, but Jin quirked an eyebrow.
"So... Which blackboard do you want us to use?" the yeti asked.
"Whichever. Your sentencing is complete," the Headmaster said, pulling out a magazine and flipping through it as if the students were already leaving.
"So... we could walk out of here, do no writing whatsoever, and you would have no way to tell, would you?" Jin continued.
The Headmaster didn't respond for several seconds, staring intently at his magazine, before suddenly glancing up at them. "Why are you still here?"
"Leaving!" chorused most of the old Enforcers, happily turning around to evacuate the office. Kishia took hold of Jin's wheelchair and pushed him out, while Kuyo took up the rear, rubbing his chin in thought before he voiced it.
"We should plan our murderous revenge on the Protection Committee with all haste! But first, I crave tacos! To the cafeteria, weak and unattractive minions!"
"Yes, fine, have fun with that," the Headmaster mumbled.
Hr
"So did you want to talk to me about something?" Tsukune asked as he rinsed his hands off in a bucket of water next to the camp site.
Kouma still looked deeply troubled, and it was starting to bother Tsukune a little. Like everyone else in the Protection Committee, he knew Kouma for being belligerent and violent, and seeing him in brooding state meant that something was definitely wrong.
"Yeah, well... I guess I..." Kouma trailed off again as he sat down next to Tsukune, and then took a deep breath.
"Aw, screw it. I'm sorry!" he said suddenly, moving into a bowing position and touching his forehead to the ground. "I'm really, REALLY sorry!"
Tsukune froze. "Excuse me? Sorry for what?"
"For disobeying your orders!" Kouma shouted, squeezing his eyes shut. "For losing to that damn witch! For almost killing Sendo! For running off and doing my own thing while the rest of you were fighting for your lives!"
The hellhound looked miserable as he sat up again, and Tsukune boggled briefly at the list of regrets.
"Kouma, you don't have to apologize to me," Tsukune said, shaking his head, "everyone makes mistakes. And you're an important part of our team!"
Kouma's expression soured. "With all due respect, Captain, you're full of crap. I haven't made mistakes, I've made DECISIONS, mostly without any thought for the rest of you. And as for being part of the team, how bad off were you, really, for not having me around when the old Enforcers attacked?"
Tsukune frowned as he scratched his head. "Well, that's hard to say. I don't really factor you into most of my plans because I can't rely on... Oh. Right. Now I get it."
The young human looked rather embarrassed to have admitted this, but Kouma once again dropped his gaze to the ground.
"The whole time I've been with the Protection Committee I've hardly accomplished anything! I'm the second strongest fighter and probably the second smartest as well-"
"Yuu thur stronges'," mumbled Chopper in his sleep, rolling onto one side, "naw cowntin' da vampurr..."
"Whatever!" Kouma snapped. "My point is that all my skills and efforts have counted for nothing so far! If you consider the witch turning me against you, maybe LESS than nothing! If it weren't for Akashiya, I'd be the biggest hunk of dead weight on this team, and..."
Kouma took a deep breath, and Tsukune remained respectfully silent.
"And I... need to change that," Kouma finished, as if straining against himself, "as things are now, I'm more of a danger to you than a help! I guess you've all taken my temper in stride up until now, and I've never really appreciated that before. I ABANDONED you guys out in enemy territory in order to kill the old witch-"
"Which was also against my orders," Tsukune interrupted.
"R-Right... And even before that, I tried to KILL one of my teammates!" Kouma said, looking guilty.
"Well, let's be fair about that one," Tsukune said, "you didn't know you were trying to kill Yukari. And I had her deliberately provoke you."
"Yeah. So I was only trying to murder Ranma, as part of your plan. Because apparently the only thing reliable about me is my temper," Kouma grumbled miserably.
Tsukune was silent for a bit before scratching the back of his head. "Well... what can I say? You've obviously been putting a lot more thought into this than me. I think you have a point. So what happens now?"
Kouma looked around nervously, making sure no one else was both conscious and within earshot. "Okay, just... hold still, okay?"
Danger alarms began sounding in Tsukune's head as Kouma transformed, the wave of fire from the metamorphosis almost searing him from the hellhound's proximity.
"Okay, wait, hold on. What's happening here?" Tsukune asked, though he remained still as asked.
"Well, I'd probably punch anybody else who put it like this, but essentially it's 'obedience training'," the hellhound growled, leaning forward as he sat on his haunches, "now roll up your sleeve and give me your hand."
Tsukune did no such thing. "Are you trying to teach me to 'shake'? Am I the one who's being trained?"
Kouma's eyebrow twitched, and he took a deep, calming breath before he spoke again.
"Give me your hand, PLEASE."
Tsukune hesitantly complied this time, pulling up his sleeve and holding out his right arm as if he was going to get an injection. "Okay, fine, but is this going to hurt?"
"Yes. Try not to shout," Kouma mumbled, his mouth flaring a bright orange.
Tsukune squeezed his eyes shut as the hellhound's blazing jaws opened opened over his forearm, although the expected sensation of several fire-hot fangs ripping apart his flesh never materialized.
What did happen was that his entire arm was surrounded by a comfortable warmth, while a relatively small area on his wrist was subjected to excruciating pain as it was badly scorched.
Tsukune clenched his teeth and his fists as the heat faded slightly, and the searing pain gradually receded to a sharp stinging sensation.
"I'm done. You can open your eyes now," Kouma deadpanned, "and on a side note, you faced down a yoko the other day, right? Don't be a wimp."
Tsukune looked down at his arm to assess the damage. Smoke wafted from his flesh in uncomfortable amounts, and he could see that underneath it his skin had been burned with curiously surgical precision. A pentagram two inches in diameter was set in his flesh ringed by tiny runes, and Tsukune could swear that it seemed to glow in a manner not usually associated with burnt skin.
"Okay, would you like to explain exactly what you did, now? Because if I was just inducted into a cult, I am going to be SO mad," Tsukune said, glaring at Kouma.
Kouma once again checked that there was nobody around before he leaned in toward the human boy. "That sigil marks you as my master."
Tsukune raised an eyebrow. "How's that, exactly?"
"Hellhounds are guards and soldiers. We're bred to fight and serve," Kouma said, sitting on his haunches, "so we have a whole system of oaths and contracts that we can engage in if the circumstances are right." Once again Kouma lowered his gaze. "Obviously just being your subordinate is getting me nowhere. I have to take this more seriously."
"Okay, but do you have to take it THIS seriously?" Tsukune asked, gesturing to his arm. "I mean, why me? Just because I'm the captain?"
"No, not just because you're the captain," Kouma shook his head, "because you're the captain of a team made up of people who could all wipe the floor with you. Because you not only enforce law, but insist that it have meaning. Because you know the difference between responsibility and power. And finally, it's because when I was captured and turned against you, and was yelling for you to finish me off, you didn't give up on me. You saved my life, even though it could have gotten Sendo killed." Kouma stood up, meeting Tsukune's eyes again. "Considering all I've done for the Committee so far, you have way more faith in me than I deserve, and it's about time I started living up to that. So from now on I'm your personal guard. You say bark, I bark. I will perform any task you give me to the best of my ability, and cannot harm you deliberately until you break the contract."
Tsukune looked rather overwhelmed as he stared at the mark on his wrist. "I... I see. And this mark represents the contract?"
"Yeah. It also gives you +20 fire resistance and will get you into all the higher-level Satanic cults," Kouma explained, pointing a claw at the brand, "but don't worry, it's not like you pledged your soul to the devil or anything."
"You're SURE about that?" Tsukune said, his eyes narrowing.
"Yes. At WORST, he might get your right arm," Kouma allowed, rolling his eyes, "but your soul has nothing to do with this... provided you don't become mad with power and allow it to corrupt you and all. I guess that could happen. But you'll be fine, probably."
Tsukune seemed satisfied with the answer, and he rolled his sleeve back down. "Well, honestly Kouma, I don't know what to say. I don't think it's necessary for you serve me personally rather than as part of the Committee, but if you want to do this to improve yourself, then I'm glad to be a part of that."
Kouma bowed his head to his new master, which frankly looked just bizarre to Tsukune. Kouma was the most volatile, proudest person he knew, so for him to bow to someone like Tsukune was no small matter.
"By the way, I'd like you to keep this arrangement on the down-low, as much as possible," Kouma mumbled, shifting back into his human form, "I mean, if you really want to tell people that's up to you, but-"
"No, no, I understand," Tsukune assured him, shaking his head, "I'm already Captain, so it's not like you don't already have reason to do what I say. We can definitely keep this whole deal a secret."
Hr
"So I guess Tsukune is like, Kouma's owner now."
Kurumu and Keito looked up at Mizore, pausing in their current task of shoveling Tobaki's excess slime into a corner. "I was looking for Ranma and overheard them talking."
"Owner? The captain doesn't strike me as much of a slaveholder," Keito pointed out.
"It's more of a pet/master relationship, looks like." The snow woman took a seat in the corner, looking bored.
"Why would Gamaroshi agree to something like that?" Kurumu asked, tossing a shovelful of gunk into a pile in the corner.
"Because he sucks," was Mizore's reply, followed by a disinterested shrug.
"True. He certainly does," Keito mumbled, "but anyway, Kurono, do go on. What happened after the blizzard started?"
"Right, right. Well, turned out it was Kuyo and those guys from the old Protection Committee. You know, the one composed entirely of freaks and crooks?"
Tobaki cleared her throat, which ended up sounding more like a metallic shriek since she had no actual throat to clear. "Present company excluded, I hope?"
"You keep telling yourself that." Kurumu shoveled out the last wad of yellow ooze that had seeped out over the greater part of the shed's floor, and then wiped her forehead. "Anyway, long story short, they attacked us, but we beat them, then they attacked us some more, but Evil Moka beat them, and then Ranma showed up and they all retreated, but then we attacked them and beat them again. Busy day."
She and Keito tossed their tools in a haphazard pile next to Mizore.
"Well, who would have thought that we hadn't seen the last of them?" Keito said blithely. "Whatever. Did you find any solution to Tobaki's curse?"
"I guess? You'd have to ask the witches." Then Kurumu frowned thoughtfully. "I wonder if Tsukune has to take Kouma on walks now? Because that would be really funny at first but turn out to be a pain eventually."
"EVERYBODY UP! TIME FOR ROLL CALL!"
Keito frowned at the sound of Ranma shouting. "He really did make good time coming back. I was holding out hope that our esteemed faculty would at least dismember him a little bit."
It wasn't really possible for Mizore's expression to get any colder than it was, but nonetheless Keito felt a great deal of violent intent turned her way as the snow fairy glared.
"You should be more careful about what you say..." she warned, an icy mist seeping from the corner of her mouth.
"It shouldn't be a secret to anyone what I think of the fool by now," Keito retorted, smirking as she headed for the door, "but never mind that. The clod demands our presence."
Hr
A few minutes later, the complete Protection Committee plus Ruby was outside, awake and at the ready. Most of them were standing straight elbow-to-elbow, as if under a military inspection, while Ranma and Tsukune stood in front of them, with the latter flanked by Kouma. Tsukune looked rather vexed, though that seemed to have little to do with the roll call and more to do with the fact that Moka was still in her more violent, unbound form.
"All right everyone, I heard you had lots of fun without me the last couple of days, but now that I'm here, fun time is over!" Ranma shouted.
"It wasn't that fun almost being killed," Kana grumbled loudly enough for everyone to hear.
Chopper grinned. "Speak for yerself! I can seriously tell people that I beat up yetis in my sleep, now!"
"Yeah, okay, settle down," Ranma continued, clasping his hands behind his back, "I have a training schedule for the Compliance Squad today, but first we should clear up a few other matters."
Ranma snapped his arm to the side, pointing at the giant red eyeball sitting atop a mound of yellow sludge. "Tobaki! Why are you in your monster form? And in the human world, too!"
"It was her! She's a witch!" Tobaki howled, waving her tentacles at the general direction of Yukari and Ruby. "Burn her!"
"Tobaki, we've been over this. We're not burning Ruby," Tsukune chided.
"She turned me into a demon!" the yochlol cried.
"You were already a demon!" Yukari pointed out.
"Not ALL the time!"
"Okay, just calm down," Ranma said, stepping toward the pair of witches, "though now that you mention it, we do have someone new. Who're you?"
Ruby inclined her head slightly at the pigtailed boy. "My name is Ruby, a... resident of Witch's Knoll. I bear some responsibility for Tsukune and his friends being attacked since they arrived her, so I'm staying to help however I can."
Ranma scratched his chin. "So you're the reason Tobaki's in rape mode right now?"
"Actually 'rape mode' is more a state of mind than body," Tobaki pointed out shamelessly, "and since I'm still in the middle of a Committee activity, I'm trying to keep things professional, so rape mode is off."
Ruby spent a moment squirming, rather disturbed by Tobaki's response. Between the yochlol's demands that she suffer (more or less legitimately) for her actions and her casual discussion of sexual assault, Tobaki definitely made her extremely uncomfortable.
"I participated in casting the curse Tobaki suffers from, yes. I am working with Yukari to remove it from her."
Ranma's eyebrows perked up. "Can you remove other kind of curses?"
"Nope! Sorry! I checked!" Yukari said brightly. "You're doomed to be twice as sexy as everyone else for the forseeable future!"
Ranma clicked his tongue, and then took another long look at Ruby. "So... did Tobaki attack you, or were you recently mauled by wild animals, or what?"
Ruby blinked. "What? No. I haven't been harmed."
"You're dressed like a flood victim and smell like dead birds," Ranma said tactlessly.
"I missed him a lot," Kurumu said with a smile as Kana snickered.
Ruby's expression rapidly shifted from nervous to annoyed. "Really? You're going to lecture me on fashion?"
"Fine, I'll stick to hygiene," Ranma shrugged, crossing his arms over his chest, "you can use magic, right? Is there no 'summon bath' spell?"
As more of the Protection Committee started snickering Ruby grew more incensed, and she clenched her hands into fists as she glared up at Ranma. "Unlike the 'clean, civilized humans' you lot are so fond of, us witches are at peace with the natural world! The scents and trappings of the wilderness do not offend us!"
"Do the scents and trappings of Tobaki's body slime offend you? You could've at least washed THAT off. Or do you have some dumb hippie rule against washing in general?"
Keito scratched her chin as Tsukune hung his head.
"It's like looking at a twisted mirror image of your diplomatic efforts, where every word is calculated to break the target's calm and feed deeper resentment into the listener. It's really quite fascinating."
"Senpai, come on, go easy on her," Yukari protested, seeing a fight brewing between her new friend and her personal idol, "she's not a Youkai Academy student or anything; she's been living in the wild half of her life."
"So have I, and nobody ever taught me that ripping up your clothes is 'fashion'," Ranma said, staring critically at the fuming witch, "I dunno, I think she might be a bad influence on you, Yukari."
"Why? Because of the attempt at mass murder and cursing people who 'intrude' on public land?" Keito said in a tone that was both sarcastic and amused at the same time.
"Well, no, I wasn't talking about that, but now that you bring it up, what's with that murder thing?" Ranma asked, scratching his head. All he had been told was that there had been a lot of fighting against plant monsters, and then against the old Enforcers. He hadn't really thought to ask about the details since everybody made it through alive, but now the conflict seemed pretty interesting, if not important.
"Actually, Yukari, Ruby, why don't you two go work on that cure for Tobaki's curse?" Tsukune said, cutting off any further argument and narrowly preventing Ruby from restoring her previous attitude toward humans. "Ranma needs to concentrate on his training schedule."
Ruby looked like she was about to protest the order - and given that Tsukune had no technical authority over her, she would have been right to do so - but then set her jaw and turned away. "Yes. Come, Yukari. We have more important important things to do than stand here and be insulted by this cretin."
Yukari followed the older witch back to the shed, casting Ranma a brief apologetic smile. "Okay, but you know that Senpai was talking about you specifically, right? 'Cause I take baths all the time!"
"Do you take some sort of thrill out of being an ass?" Evil Moka asked bluntly, a fist resting on her hip.
"No, I was being serious," Ranma said defensively, "what if Yukari starts copying her and rips holes in her socks and starts listening to grunge metal or... what was that other thing Keito was talking about?"
"Planning the annihilation of an entire city and cursing strangers for no good reason," Keito clarified, enjoying herself far more than usual.
"Er, yeah. Someone wanna explain that to me?"
Tsukune shook his head. "I don't think you have anything to worry about. Yukari seemed far more interested in reforming her than joining her crusade, and I convinced Ruby to give up her grudge against humans."
"Although you're spot-on about her bathing habits," Kana said, making a face like she was gagging.
"Anyway, why don't you discuss the training schedule?" Tsukune said, determined to steer the conversation away from Ruby. He didn't expect her and Ranma to get along so poorly in their first meeting, and if he was being honest, the more they knew about each other the worse it would get. Ranma wasn't exactly a paragon of humanity's best traits (which wasn't a problem so long as everyone refused to acknowledge his species), and Ruby's dabbling in genocide wasn't so easy to forgive if one hadn't met Oyakata and seen the younger witch defy her late guardian.
Ranma took a few seconds to think, then shrugged his shoulders. "All right, well, I'm going to be doing some one-on-one work with the Compliance Squad. I'll start with Kouma while Chopper and Kurumu do warm-up exercises."
Kouma, rather than answering, turned to look at Tsukune.
Tsukune took a moment to realize that he was expected to give a command. "Go ahead, Kouma. You don't need my permission."
Kouma said nothing and nodded respectfully as Ranma stared at them, bewildered.
Kurumu snorted. "Maybe we should get him a collar and a leash. We'll have Tsukune's name engraved on the back so that Kouma can be returned to his owner if he gets lost."
Kouma's eyes bugged out, and he flinched as a metaphorical arrow struck him in the back. "What-? How-? Who-?"
"If you're going to be performing infernal rituals with embarrassing implications... you probably shouldn't do it within earshot of the camp... " Mizore mumbled.
Tsukune frowned, seeing Kouma struggle to keep his embarrassment from turning into incendiary fury. "All right, cut it out, all of you," he ordered, rolling his eyes, "Kouma made his decision specifically to make a better contribution to the team, and mocking him for it isn't helping anything."
"Oh, don't get me wrong, I think it's a great idea. Whatever keeps the magical fire breath aimed at the enemy," Kurumu assured him, "and he couldn't have chosen a better master, either! If anything, it took him way too long to do this."
"What are you guys talking about?" Ranma asked, once again feeling left out of the loop. "What happened to Kouma?"
The hellhound in question said nothing as Mizore stepped over and whispered into Ranma's ear.
"WHAT? Kouma, what did you do? I thought I was your master!" Ranma complained. The fact that Ranma seemed genuinely surprised and disappointed didn't make Kouma feel any better about the revelation.
"You thought WRONG," Kouma said through clenched teeth, "I told you, I don't swear loyalty to the first dolt who jumps me out of nowhere and beats me up."
"But that's how it works in the movies!" Ranma protested.
"He's got you there," Tobaki said, flailing a tentacle in their general direction.
"NO HE DOESN'T!!" Kouma exploded, immediately causing everyone but Ranma and Evil Moka to flinch away from the sudden fireburst. Tsukune actually yelps as he's forced to jump away, his arm scorched from proximity.
"Yeah, I'm definitely thinking you enjoy this," Evil Moka said, running a hand through her hair (the only part of her at all disturbed by the heated shock wave).
"Kouma, calm down, please!" Tsukune shouted, shielding his arm. Surprisingly, Kouma did so, his aura turning down immediately and vanishing into a few wisps of thick smoke. How calm he actually was, really, was still open to debate though, given that he was glaring intensely at the line of monsters mocking him.
Tsukune turned toward Ranma, who still looked annoyed. "Ranma, what do you mean that you thought you were his master? You and Kouma are partners, aren't you?"
"Well, yeah," Ranma admitted, rubbing the back of his head, "but usually guys with dogs as partners are still the masters of the dogs, right?"
Kouma's mouth opened to begin another enraged rant, only to freeze as Tsukune held up a hand in front of him.
"Ranma, I don't think that's the kind of partnership Kouma wants," Tsukune drawled, "he may be a hellhound, but first and foremost he's a member of Youkai Academy, training to be a human, and a member of our team. You should treat him like a human partner, not like a pet."
Ranma stops to think about it, looking considerably embarrassed as Tsukune's reasoning sinks in. "Well... okay, sure. I see your point. I guess that wasn't fair of me." Then he quirked an eyebrow. "But I can still make dog jokes about him, right?"
"I'm not expecting miracles, here," Tsukune admitted with a relieved smile, "but I am trying to break Kouma of his habit of attempting to murder you."
Kouma said nothing, once again returning to his uncharacteristic subdued state. He squirmed uncomfortably, completely unfamiliar with the experience of letting someone else defend him.
"Right, right. Well, let's get a move on, Eyebrows. Training to do," Ranma said, turning and gesturing in Kouma's general direction.
Kouma hesitated, and then gave Tsukune a respectful nod before jogging off after Ranma.
Kurumu and Chopper moved out after them, each of them mildly disappointed that they might no longer be entertaining by Kouma's volcanic bursts of rage.
When Tsukune returned his attention to the lineup, he noted that Evil Moka and Mizore had also slipped away at some point. He wasn't sure what to think about that. Should he really be leaving Moka in her unlocked form, especially when Ranma was around? And he was sure he had a thing or two to teach Mizore about polite discretion in her constant eavesdropping, even if he had no hope of getting her to stop her stalking habits entirely.
"So, let me get this straight..." Tobaki said suddenly. The psychic echo of her words, and painful as ever for his defenseless mortal mind, immediately dragged him from his musings.
The yochlol hesitated for a moment, one of her tentacles reaching up and slithering over her eyeball in imitation of a human scratching its head. "... Does that imply that movies are NOT always accurate in their representation of myth and culture?"
Tsukune wanted to let loose an exasperated sigh, but had to rationalize that this was actually one of the few harmless and innocent misunderstandings he had seen come from the demon girl. "Yes, Tobaki, that's exactly what he was implying."
"Huh. Wow." Her eyeball rotated downward, to stare at the ground briefly. Then it rolled up again to stare at Tsukune once more. "But television shows are true, right? They've taught us all so much!"
"All right then!" Tsukune said, clapping his hands together with a smile on his face. "It looks like I have a topic for today's lecture! Have a seat."
"Eugh," groaned Keito and Kana, shooting Tobaki annoyed looks.
