Bleach Peer Review Omake Thread

[Andrew Joshua Talon]

From Captain Ukitake Jyoushiro to Captain Kyoraku Shunsui:

... So... Want to push all the paperwork on our vice captains and go get drunk, as per standard procedure? Well, our standard procedure, anyway.

Fourth Seat Kuchiki Rukia to Members of SWA (No One But Female Shinigami Can See this Message):

Edition 5 of the Kurakara Stud. Enjoy them for now but be careful. Ichigo seems suspicious... Still, definitely worth it. Enjoy his "Bankai", ladies.

Vice-Captain Hinamori Momo to Shinigami Representative Kurosaki Ichigo:

Ichigo-san, I've been working on achieving Bankai but so far no luck. As you achieved yours so quickly, I was wondering if you could give me some tips?

Third-Seat Kotetsu Kiyone to Shinigami Representative Kurosaki Ichigo:

Kurosaki-san, I have heard you gained Bankai in only three days! As someone who is hoping to impress my captain, I would very much like to learn from you!

Vice-Captain Nemu Kurotsuchi to Shinigami Representative Kurosaki Ichigo:

Kurosaki-san, your proficiency in Bankai is remarkable. I would very much like to discuss it's various applications with you in person, and perhaps achieving it myself.

VC Hinamori to Captain (Shiro-chan) Hitsugaya:

Just for that, I've asked the Butterfly Network technicians to change your ID code to "Shiro-chan". Take that!

Well, granted, I suppose the smell could get on my nerves... Captain Aizen may have been a backstabbing, two-faced, no-good son of a bitch but at least he didn't drink.

By the way... I'm distributing a few embarrassing photos of him in the shower that I took when I was fangirling over him. I have got to say, no wonder he wants to be God...

And speaking of photos... You are SO CUTE!

From Captain Unohana Retsu to Captain Hitsugaya (Shiro-chan) Toshiro:

Don't worry Captain Hitsugaya, you have nothing to worry about. This situation will be kept entirely confidential. Though I must point out that "Shotacon Tendencies" is not exactly fixable with a pill. The best solution is to try and get her to have a healthy relationship with a man closer to her own physical age.

Also, do not take this as an insult, but you seem rather short-tempered lately. Perhaps you could allow me to check on your stress levels?

Sincerely,

Captain Unohana

From Captain Unohana Retsu to [Anonymous] (Private Line)

Pray I never find out who you are. I save the biggest enemas for people like you...

From Captain Soi Fong to Captain Hitsugaya (Shiro-chan) Toshiro:

YOU. WILL. PAY!

 

[~NGD OMEGA~]

Captain (Shiro-chan) Hitsugaya to VC (Bed-wetter Momo) Hinamori

HA! Taste of your own medicine! And since my authority trumps yours, I'm going to get rid of the Shiro-chan thing while I'm at it!

And for the love of God, don't send pictures like that to me again. However if you have any of the cat plush toy incident, I'll take them. I've almost found all of them. Luckily Matsumoto managed to collect a whole stock and put them in her file cabinet, so I doubt there can be many more left.

Curl up and die,

Captain Hitsugaya

Captain Hitsugaya to Captain Unohana

Thank you for your odd advice. I'll see to it imediately. On a side note, a few flowers are attached that are to be sent to 11thD 3rdS Ikkaku wishing him a quick recovery.

And take your stress levels and stuff it why don't you. I'm perfectly fine. It's not my fault I have to freaking sign papers with my eyes clothes to keep my Vice Captain from bursting out in tears. If I didn't hate him, I'd have a lot of respect for Former-Captain Ichimaru Gin. And don't get me started on this cat plush toy incident. I'll find whoever it was...

Best of Luck,

Captain Hitsugaya

Captain Hitusgaya to Captain Soifon

SO IT WAS YOU!!! PREPARE TO DIE!!!

Result of the Short battle:

(Just because I like the picture)

 

[Slyfer101]

Vice-Captain Omaeda to 10Th Division Captain Hitsugya (Shiro-chan) Toshiro:

Captain, why didn't you just ask who's plushy it was!?! Now Soifon-taicho is angry. When she gets angry, she gets punchy. When she's punchy, I'M USUALLY THE TARGET!

Captain Unohana Retsu to Captain Soifon

Captain, while I do understand the need to vent, I would request that you refrain from further 'venting' in regards to your Vice-Captain. His tendancy to speak while under anethisia could get the 2nd into real trouble, and Isane is getting more than a little tired of his attempts at courting her.

Captain Unohana Retsu to Captain Soifon

I forgot, your physical appointment has been scheduled for tomorrow. Please do not miss it.

 

[Andrew Joshua Talon]

VC (Bed-wetter Momo) Hinamori to Captain (Shiro-chan) Hitsugaya:

Well, I may have to put up with that because of your rank, but you have to put up with it because the Butterfly guy owes me a favor. So there, Shiro-chan.

But seriously Shiro-chan, why are you so angry lately? If it's because of Matsumoto, you could ask Captain Kyoraku to trade you Ise-san for a while? I'd help you, but I'm working on my bankai training. Ichigo-san is so helpful! And patient! And rugged! And handsome, especially with...

Er... Nevermind, Shiro-chan. I'll talk to you later. Try to relax a little, okay? After all, the plushy cat photos are nowhere near as bad as the rumors that you were Gin's willing sex slave, right?

Take care,

Momo-chan

Captain Soi Fong to Captain (Shiro-chan) Hitsugaya:

You had better be ready to repay me for my cat plushy. I command the Secret Forces, after all. You could find yourself in the clutches of your perverted Vice-Captain like that. So watch your step, 'Shiro-chan,' and don't make me angry. You wouldn't like me when I'm angry.

From Captain Unohana Retsu to Captain Hitsugaya (Shiro-chan) Toshiro:

Captain Hitsugaya, I am aware you dislike being mocked or called a child, but please, must you get into serious confrontations on a daily basis? I've hardly heard a peep out of Captain Zaraki! Admittedly, he's still in the ICU, but my point stands. Have you considered taking up a relaxing hobby? Like video games? I received a Playstation 2 from a friend of mine in the Living World. At least consider it.

Sincerely,

Captain Unohana

From Vice-Captain Abarai Renji to Shinigami Representative Kurosaki Ichigo:

You're training women in Bankai? Exactly what makes you so special, Strawberry?

 

[zeebee1]

Could you remove the mention of Karakura Stud? You might have forgotton, but it doesn't exist in this story.

 

[Andrew Joshua Talon]

COuld you remove the mention of Karakura Stud? You might have forgotton, but it doesn't exist in this story.

That's what Rukia calls her illicit photo albums of Ichigo that she takes when he's not aware. I just reused the name. Go with it.

 

[Cosgrove]

From Shinigami Representative Kurosaki Ichigo to Vice-Captain Abarai Renji:

Sorry, I don't swing that way. Nothing against you and your captain, I'm just not gay.

From Shinigami Representative Kurosaki Ichigo to Ishida Uryuu, Inoue Orihime, and Chad Yasutora:

How about we all go on a trip, and get the hell away from the freaks in Soul Society and their insane messages they send to each other?

 

[Andrew Joshua Talon]

Inoue Orihime to Shinigami Representative Kurosaki Ichigo:

Oh, but I have so much fun with Matsumoto-san and Kuchiki-san!

By the way Kurosaki-kun, why don't I get a neat title like everyone else on this messenger? Couldn't I be "Lover of Bean Paste Inoue Orihime?" Or Shun Shun Rikka Inoue Orihime? Or "Magical Defender of Justice, Pretty Orihime!"

Yasutora "Chad" Sado to Shinigami Representative Kurosaki Ichigo:

Sounds good to me. I'm not sure I like the looks I keep getting from Ururu-san when she visits. Why she visits, right when I'm always in the shower or getting dressed, I have no idea... But I have my suspicions.

Quincy Ishida Uryu to Shinigami Representative Kurosaki Ichigo:

Just because you can't handle the affections of a few fangirls, Kurosaki, doesn't mean we're all plagued by-Kurotsuchi Nemu-san? What are you doing here? I didn't mumfh!

Transmission Ended

Vice Captain Abarai Renji to Shinigami Representative Kurosaki Ichigo:

WHAT THE-?! YOU'RE THE ONE WITH A GAY NAME, STRAWBERRY!

(You know, just because one person is already doing a character, doesn't mean others can't do it as well. C'mon, go for it. Keep the madness going. GOING! MWAHAHAHAHAHA!
:evil2: )

 

[Cosgrove]

Shinigami Representative Kurosaki Ichigo to Inoue Orihime:

Beats me. I sure would like to get rid of this stupid 'Shinigami Representative' title.

But is that a yay or nay on the trip?

Shinigami Representative Kurosaki Ichigo to Yasutora Chad:

A bit too much info there, Chad. But its good to know you're going on the trip.

Shinigami Representative Kurosaki Ichigo to Quincy Ishida Uryuu:

Uryuu? Can you hear me?

NOO!!!

...

So, is that a yes on the trip now?

Captain Kuchiki Byakuya to Shinigami Representative Kurosaki Ichigo:

I heard the comment you sent to Renji.

Don't worry, since I owe you, I won't killl you.

Hope you enjoy going to the Shinigami Women's Association meetings, Kurosaki.

 

[~NGD OMEGA~]

I have a funny feeling you're trying to lead me somewhere... however I'm clueless with hints, so I'll try to wing it...

Captain Hitsugaya to VC (Bed-wetter Momo) Hinamori

ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!!! STOP WITH THE SHIRO-CHAN'S ALREADY!!!

As for the butterfly guy, turns out he's very cooperative with Captains when he's an ice cube. Let's hope nothing like this happens again.

You can trade Vice Captains... WHY THE HELL DIDN'T YOU TELL ME THIS BEFORE?!?!?!

Gin's Sex Slave? Excuse me, I have words to speak with certain people...

Screw you,

Captain Hitsugaya

Captain Hitsugaya to AL Gin

You wouldn't happen to be the source of those rumors would you? If you keep this up, you can expect a freaking blizzard in Hueco Mundo any day now.

Keel over and die,

Captain Hitsugaya

Captain Hitsugaya to SR Ichigo

You break Hinamori's heart, and I will make damn sure there won't be enough pieces left of you to fill a thimble. And while I'm at it, I'll make sure your family forget's you too. I'm a shinigami, I can make it happen.

And thanks for those weird games you sent me, whatever they are...

Best wishes,

A friend

Captain Hitsugaya to Captain Soifon through a secure line

You think I'm scared of you, you furry loving lesbian?! You can expect a new plush toy when hell freezes over. And considering I'm the only one that can do that, you might as well get comfy. In the meantime, you can ammuse yourself with the remains of the old one I've sent along with this message.

Should serve you right for taking ridiculous pictures of people when their asleep.

And while I'm at it, attached is a copy of Captain Kenpachi's Peer Review. Enjoy <3.

Go die, you crazy cat loving psycho,

Captain Hitsugaya

P.S. I'll take you on anytime. Make sure Unohana doesn't follow you this time.

Captain Hitsugaya to VC Matsumoto

What... my bed... flowers?! WHAT THE HELL?!?!?!?!?! MATSUMOTO!!!!!!!!!!!!

Captain Hitsugaya to Captain Unohana

I'm not stressed out!!! And I'm certainly not violent at all! Oh wait... yeah, the Buttefly guy should have arrived at your division right now... err...

Argh, fine I'll try to cool it down alright?! Come to think of it, Ichigo sent these wierd games that he says helps to deal with stress. He called it an Online game or something. Title says "World of Warcraft", whatever that means. I never got around to setting up this computer thing, but I guess I could take some time off to try it out...

Oh, and by the way, attached is the Peer Review of Zaraki Kenpachi, which was what initially led me into a mad rampage. I hope for his quick recovery.

Sincerely,

Captain Hitsugaya

Captain Hitusgaya to Captain Kyoraku

I've been holding this off for a while, but today was the last straw. I don't want to know why Matsumoto was in my bed covered in nothing but flowers but this has got to stop. It's bad enough she forced me to change my hair style of all things, however I keep on bumping into walls because she insists on keeping my eyes closed. I have reached the very limits of my patience. This has been going on for weeks and there has been no change in her behavior despite all the visits to Captain Unohana. Clearly therapy isn't working, so I'm forced to believe this has something to do with stress.

I need to formally ask you to switch the placements of our Vice Captains. I am lead believe that Matsumoto is unable to work under my command due to my strickness, and I think she would be able to work much better with you in your division given how both of you enjoy drinking, among other similarities. I hope for a speedy response.

Captain Hitsugaya

 

[Cosgrove]

Shinigami Representative Kurosaki Ichigo to Captain Hitsugaya:

Except I'm stronger than you and also a Shinigami. Next time you come down here, I'll introduce you to an American tradition.

Its called stuffing dorks in lockers, shrimp.

 

[zerohour]

Kon to Shinigami Representative Kurosaki Ichigo

What's this I hear about a vacation?!? You think I'd just let you leave be behind with that demon girl you call a sister?!? To hell with you Ichigo!!!? I'm going whether you like it or not!

 

[~NGD OMEGA~]

Captain Hitsugaya Toshiro to SR Ichigo

Oh really? Can you be sure that you can jump into being a Shinigami at any moment? Walking down the halls, would you be able to jump out of your body in time to dodge a giant ice dragon that comes out of nowhere? And even if you did jump, would you be able to protect your body in that time? Trust me Strawberry, there will be a moment, one moment, when your guard is down. And I will find it, I'll wait for it, and I'll be ready. Can you make sure to never slip up Strawberry? CAN YOU!?

And never forget that there are other ways to get you. Does your father know about the Arrancar friend that constantly jumps you? Didn't think so.

As for stuffing me in a locker, I'd like to see you try it with a mile long dragon made of ice on your tail.

Anyway I'm having some difficulties with this game you sent me. For some reason I was Rolfed the other day when trying to converse with the locals in this "World of Warcraft" thing you sent me. And for some reason the locals lack any sort of punctuation at all. For goodness sake, they replace letters with numbers? Is this supposed to be some sort of code? I assure you, this isn't helping me with my stress levels at all.

Attached is a list of unusual words and phrases that I encountered while playing, none the least of which include "lol", "rolf", "L2P", "n00b", and the odd "Who the heck are you?! Leeroy Jenkins?!". I require translations as soon as possible.

I wish you the best of luck,

Captian Hitsugaya

 

[Cosgrove]

Shinigami Representative Kurosaki Ichigo to Kon:

Remember how Rukia hid you before she left us that one night? I don't really even need you anymore, and I think Yuzu would really like spending more time with you.

Shinigami Representative Kurosaki Ichigo to Captain Hitsugaya Toshiro:

Hello? Shinigami Representative badge?

Second, With my Bankai, you'd be shrimp-kabobs.

Third, I'd still have a back up just in case.

Finally, you go near my house, you die, shorty.

As for the game, have fun, 'Shiro-chan'!

 

[Andrew Joshua Talon]

VC Matsumoto to Captain Hitsugaya:

I'm sorry Captain! I just can't help it! You're so cute, yet so studly! So adorable, yet so manly for your age! My hormones just get out of whack!

If it makes you feel better, I'll stop asking you to keep your eyes closed? Or mess with your hair? Even though you look much cuter than way...

(To ~NEO OMEGA~: No I'm not leading you towards anything. I just think that Hinamori and Hitsugaya teasing eachother like this is funny.)



VC (Bed-wetter Momo) Hinamori to Captain Hitsugaya:

I'm going to get you for this, Shiro-chan. And what's with telling me to screw you? Are you propositioning me? Because if you are, I'm sorry, but that would be like having sex with my brother.

Ewww...! Thanks a lot for giving me that mental image, Shiro-chan! You pervert!

AL Gin to Captain Shorty:

I also know a guy in the Butterfly Pavilion, little ice demon. Oh, that rumor? That was just Kira covering for the fact that he was my sex slave.

Bring it on, pipsqueak. I could use a good laugh... Or a snowcone.

~Gin

Captain Soifon to all Special Forces through a secure line:

Initiate operation "Ice Stripper". Go go go! VENGEANCE SHALL BE MINE, BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

(Can't Decide on a Good Title Yet) Inoue Orihime to Shinigami Representative Kurosaki Ichigo:

Sure Kurosaki-kun! I'd love to go on vacation with you! Oh, wait... I don't have a swimsuit... Tatsuki-chan never lets me buy any. She says I'd knock out half the beach if I went out...

Yasutora "Chad" Sado to Shinigami Representative Kurosaki Ichigo:

Trust me Ichigo, it's even more disturbing for me than for you.

Quincy Ishida Uryu to Shinigami Representative Kurosaki Ichigo:

Kurosaki? Shut up.

Captain Unohana to Captain Ukitake:

Honestly, I don't understand it. How Captain Zaraki ended up in the stomach of my shikai? No clue. Complete medical mystery. Don't worry, he'll be out in a few days, good as new...

 

[~NGD OMEGA~]

Captain Hitsugaya Toshiro to SR Ichigo

In the three seconds it takes you to use that badge, I'll have frozen you into another ice age. You feeling lucky?

Captain Hitsugaya

Edit: A good, I'm clueless with hints.

 

[Cosgrove]

Shinigami Representative Kurosaki Ichigo to Captain Hitsugaya Toshiro:

Bring it, shorty! I'll crush you!

Shinigami Representative Kurosaki Ichigo to Captain Soifon (private line):

I'll kick shorty's ass if you want.

Shinigami Representative Kurosaki Ichigo to Quincy Ishida Uryu:

So its a yes, then.

Shinigami Representative Kurosaki Ichigo to Yasutora Chad:

See why the Vacation sounds like a good idea?

Shinigami Representative Kurosaki Ichigo to Inoue Orihime:

Why don't you invite Tatsuki as well then? It'd be the old school group getting together. We all haven't hung out together since that time before we went to Soul Society, with the fire works. Just, we don't invite Keigo. He's kind of creepy.

 

[~NGD OMEGA~]

Captain Hitsugaya to VC (Bed-wetter Momo) Hinamori (NGD note: I really want to put the TFF motto for incest here, but I doubt that's what Hitsugaya would say)

Get your mind out of the gutter you emotionally depraved psycho. I already have one crazy woman around me, I don't need two. And for the last time, I'm your superior, you have to refer to me by my title.

Go die somewhere,

Captain Hitsugaya

Captain Hitsugaya to VC Yachiru

Come here... I have candy... come on... a little closer... *BAGGED*

Captain Hitsugaya (Anonymous) to Captain Soifon through a secure line

Right about now you should be asking yourself, 'Why do I smell chocolate?' and 'Why are there sounds of total destruction coming from my shrine of Yoruichi?'

Captain Hitsugaya to one |<u|^0$4|<1 155h1|\|

Of all of the people in this game, though you are by far the wierdest, you at least seem to answer my questions. I need to know exactly what the heck you people are saying. Your language is clearly foreign to me, and for the life of me I cannot figure out why people keep on Rofling me whenever I ask them. I tried to get the assistence of the one who gave me this 'World of Warcraft' Game, but it was a no go. I need help translating what you people are saying! WHY DON'T YOU PEOPLE SPEAK SENSE?!

Please, dear god help me,

Hitsugaya Toshiro (DeathbyIce the Frostmage)

Captain Hitsugaya to SR Strawberry

Name the time and place you loli loving orange haired reject.

 

[jaredstar]

you know somebody should make this into a fic. it already more delightful to read then half the stuff in my favorites list

 

[Andrew Joshua Talon]

VC Matsumoto to Captain Hitsugaya:

Captaaaainnn, where are youuuu? I picked up a new outfit I'd love to see you try onnnn!

VC (Bed-wetter Momo) Hinamori to Captain Soi Fong:

Need any help with your revenge?

Captain Soi Fong to VC Hinamori:

Certainly.

Captain Soi Fong to All:

In light of the massive and mysterious fire that totally wiped out Division 11's headquarters and barracks, I have officially petitioned (and received permission) to move the Eleventh Division into the Tenth Division Barracks until such time as the Eleventh Division facility is rebuilt. Which is expected to take a mere two months at best. Thank you,

Captain Soi Fong, 2nd Division

Captain Soi Fong (Anonymous) to Captain Hitsugaya (Private Line):

Enjoy your new housemates, little Shiro-chan.

Captain Unohana to Captain Kyoraku and Captain Ukitake:

Can you please, please put Captain Zaraki on a long term mission to the Living World? Or somewhere else? Anywhere but here! This is the tenth time he's slapped my ass, fifteenth time he's utterly humiliated me in front of my staff, and twenty-second time he's demanded more beer even though, last I CHECKED, the Fourth Division complex does NOT contain a bar (And no, the gift shop does not count). So please, please send him somewhere else! This man seems to believe the fact I had Minazuki eat him means I have some sort of romantic attraction to him! What kind of man is crazy enough to believe that?! Please, get him out of my hair and anywhere else for at least a week!

(Can't Decide on a Good Title Yet) Inoue Orihime to Shinigami Representative Kurosaki Ichigo:

She said yes. She also wanted to know what she had to do to get a really cool power like Chad and I from you.

Yasutora "Chad" Sado to Shinigami Representative Kurosaki Ichigo:

Definitely. When do we leave?

Quincy Ishida Uryu to Shinigami Representative Kurosaki Ichigo:

As soon as I can walk again without being in pure, soul-grinding agony? Sure...

Vice-Captain Hinamori to Shinigami Representative Kurosaki Ichigo:

Ichigo-san, may I also go on vacation with you? I've received some leave from Soul Society and to be completely honest Shiro-chan is scaring me. My new Third Seat said she could handle anything that came up, so can I please come? I promise not to tell anyone else.

Captain Unohana to Urahara Kisuke:

Do you have any devices I could use to keep a certain spikey-haired, psychotic, lecherous monster of a captain of the Eleventh Division away from me?

 

[Cornuthaum]

Soon-To-Be-God Aizen Sousuke to All You Mere Shinigami

It has come to my attention that that you are greatly upsetting Captain Unohana Retsu of the Fourth Division. I advise you to stop this immediately, as I want to gain some pleasure from crushing you myself. In case you are curious why I insinuate that keeping Captain Unohana angry spells out your bloody, gory doom, do some research for the Fourteenth Division. Look for the reason why there is no 14th.

Please die in agony;
Aizen Sousuke

Soon-To-Be-God Aizen Sousuke to My Loyal Right-Hand Man Ichimaru Gin

Gin, we need to evacuate. Somewhere. If that means ripping a hole into the dimensions and hiding in it, so be it. Retsu-chan is getting angry. Very, very angry, if our spies are to be believed. You remember what happened the last time she went bankai.

Your Loyal Right-Hand Man Ichimaru Gin to Soon-To-Be-God Aizen Sousuke

I hear that the souls in Hell are currently fighting out a civil war. Something about some 'Shishio' trying to upstage the Empress of Hell. Maybe she'll let us hide if we help her?

 

[Slyfer101]

Urahara Kisuke to Shihoin (Prettiest Cat Around) Yoruichi

My, things certainly have gotten lively up in the old haunt lately, huh my friend? Your little protege certainly seems to have a vicious streak! You must be so proud! (Big Grin) And poor Retsu-chan...when is she ever going to admit she kinda likes Kenpachi's attentions, huh? He's not too bad a guy once you get past the "I'm strong, you're strong, lets dice each other up" part of his nature.

Shihoin (You know it!) Yoruichi to Urahara (The Master of Mad Science) Kisuke

I agree, my friend. Dear Retsu..."Methinks the lady doth protest too much." As for Soifon...I couldn't be prouder! (Bigger Grin) Such a sublime way of getting revenge...though you do have to pity the other members of the 10th. I don't know, I think Hitsugya needs to just lie down and let his VC give it to him like she wants to. Kami-sama knows the kids too stiff as it is. What, does he want to become the next Byakuya?

Shihoin Yoruichi to SR Kurosaki Ichigo

Oi, Ichigo, how come you didn't invite me and Kisuke on this little trip, huh? I could almost feel unloved...and after all that good training I gave you...it could make me feel sad. (Pouty face)

Captain Soifon to SR Kurosaki Ichigo

Kurosaki, if Yoruichi-sama feels sad, I get mad. Ask my VC what happens when I get mad. Invite her on the vacation, or I'll tell Captain Unohana where you and your friends will be hiding.

SR Kurosaki Ichigo to Captain Soifon

Relax, I'll invite her! Don't forget, she's a friend of mine to...its just hard to tell where or when she'll show up! As for Captain Unohana...does she scare you as much as she scares me?

Captain Soifon to SR Kurosaki Ichigo

She's considered the 4th strongest captain for a reason, and yes, she does scare me. A lot. Which is why I try to stay healthy, and AWAY from the 4th barracks.

 

[Andrew Joshua Talon]

Captain Unohana to Former-Captain Aizen (Secure Line):

If you are implying I would release my bankai once more and unleash a level of hell and destruction unimaginable to the human mind without going stark raving mad and leave the survivors with only a blackened, burnt out ruin of a city to weep and gnash their teeth at in despair just for these recent irritations...

You are mistaken. Then, I was young, brash, impulsive... And you stood me up. At prom. What I can't understand (to this day) is why you turned me down for Gin. For Gin! And don't deny it, I've seen the photos.

So by all means, please take whatever precautions you deem necessary. It will take a lot more than the current situation to make me go bankai again, but if it happens, you're first on my list, no matter where you go.

Captain Unohana to Gotei 13:

Poor Former-Captain Aizen has apparently fallen deeper and deeper into madness ever since he left. I haven't the foggiest what he's talking about. If anyone would like some, I baked a large batch of chocolate chip cookies and have plenty of milk at the Division Four Complex in celebration that no one has been killed in the last few week's chaos.

 

[perfect_solider]

Commander Yamamoto to Ukitae Jyuushiro

heh how do you like running the circus?

 

[Andrew Joshua Talon]

Captain Ukitake Jyoushiro to Captain General Yamamoto:

Well, Retsu's calmed down slightly, the new Central 46 Chambers are easing up a bit on some of the older, more annoying laws, and Hitsugaya and Soi Fong are trying to drive eachother crazy. Pretty much as you left it.

How about you, Yama-jiji? Enjoy peeping on young women again??

Vice-Captain Hinamori to SR Kurosaki:

Ichigo-san! Why are you taking Yoruichi-san on your vacation, but not me? Haven't I proven myself trustworthy? I'm deeply hurt... :blue: