"Hey Sasuke!"
"Hn."
"Looks like I got a message from that guy you're looking for."
"...Give it here."
Foolish little brother, I can see how weak you have become even under Orochimaru's tutelage. You lack the hatred to defeat me, and I grow tired of your pathetic attempts to try. So now, I will take away and destroy everything you even remotely care about."
"Starting with this girl."
"By the time you read this, I will have already captured her and begin corrupting her until she finds you as repulsive and useless as I do. Then I will defile her in ways your impotent little mind cannot begin to understand, carve carnal pleasures into her body until she is little more that a lustful slave to me. I will show you that you cannot defeat me, and you cannot protect anyone, foolish little brother."
"Wow, harsh shit. Oh, well; sucks to be her. What are we doing now?"
------
Two hours later...
It was decidedly the most one-sided fight Suigetsu had ever seen. Made him feel a little afraid of Sasuke after that terrifying battle.
"You saved me!"
"...you're still annoying. Get out of here before I change my mind."
"All right Suigetsu, let's get out of here."
"Sure thing; let me get my sword over there. I'll catch up with you."
"Hn."
Two minutes later...
"You do know I was thanking
you back there, right? Getting Sasuke to come to my rescue so fast! Ingenious!"
"Yeah, yeah... I just hate it when you get all sappy with that guy, though."
"So, are
you going to tell him we're secretly dating each other?"
"...so long as it's pretend, I can live with it."
"So, how did you get him to come so quickly?"
"mmm.... Let's just say sometimes the pen
is mightier than the sword."