Transformers
- Thread starter blackkyuubi
- Start date
The problem is... it's mister Bay deciding that explosions is so cool that he has no room for plot.
When a movie's plot has internal consistency/continuity issues, you can't say you're watching it for the plot.
I do NOT want to give the man money for the privilege of having to turn off my brain to watch 'another summer blockbuster' that will be forgotten by the year's end, if not the summer's end. I want something that will leave me thinking.
I do NOT want to see a military-fetish movie about a college guy that cameos transformers. I want to see a movie about transformers as the stars with actual -lines-, without juvenile and crude toilet humor.
At what point would a robot need to have testicles or puke or other human issues. Seriously?
And... robot heaven sending dead college boys back from death. Just... no.
When a movie's plot has internal consistency/continuity issues, you can't say you're watching it for the plot.
I do NOT want to give the man money for the privilege of having to turn off my brain to watch 'another summer blockbuster' that will be forgotten by the year's end, if not the summer's end. I want something that will leave me thinking.
I do NOT want to see a military-fetish movie about a college guy that cameos transformers. I want to see a movie about transformers as the stars with actual -lines-, without juvenile and crude toilet humor.
At what point would a robot need to have testicles or puke or other human issues. Seriously?
And... robot heaven sending dead college boys back from death. Just... no.
Ah ha! You missed the deep philosophical point. There is no *robot* heaven, thereÆs just a heaven. At the end of the road, all sentient beings will be able to meet in a place with no wars, no poverty, suffering or all those other ills we bring down upon ourselves.
We will see all those Autobot heroes we've lost over the years like Jazz, Huffer, Wheeljack, and even Decepticon heroes like Dinobot from beast wars.
Truly, Bay is a man with a brilliant mind, and amazing directorial skill.
*Inserts Joker Laugh*
Look in all honesty, to each their own. If you didn't like or don't want to see the film that's fine. I encourage each person to, respectfully, let their opinions be known to Bay and others responsible for this film. Perhaps they'll listen and we'll get an action filled movie with a plot at least as good as the most recent Star Trek film (Which was the best movie so far this summer hands down).
We will see all those Autobot heroes we've lost over the years like Jazz, Huffer, Wheeljack, and even Decepticon heroes like Dinobot from beast wars.
Truly, Bay is a man with a brilliant mind, and amazing directorial skill.
*Inserts Joker Laugh*
Look in all honesty, to each their own. If you didn't like or don't want to see the film that's fine. I encourage each person to, respectfully, let their opinions be known to Bay and others responsible for this film. Perhaps they'll listen and we'll get an action filled movie with a plot at least as good as the most recent Star Trek film (Which was the best movie so far this summer hands down).
Okay, so maybe Transformers is a bit too light on the plot and perhaps you'll have to momentarily turn your brain off while watching it...
...but it certainly doesn't mean it wasn't enjoyable as hell!
I mean, really, considering Michael Bay's usual and singular love of things going boom, did anybody actually walk into the movie theatre expecting a compelling narrative or any sort, or did they go just for the simple joy of watching huge robots beat the crap out of each other in a flurry of awesome CG and explosions of all sizes?
I did that, and I found it to be very enjoyable. Again, the story was weak, but at the end of the day, the thing that sets Transformers apart from, say, an Uwe Boll 'film' is the fact that the former is just a ridiculous and overwhelming shitton of fun to watch.
Story be damned - if there is a movie that has me staring at the screen in wide-eyed awe and has me going 'oh, that was fucking awesome!' and at the conclusion of the film has me wondering why my feet are all damp and sweaty and why I can barely walk in a straight line or look at cars the same way...
But the thing that surprised me the most about Transformers was that brief bit at the beginning with the NEST team. The camera focused and did a very prominent close-up of the flag on one of the soldier's uniforms.
Oh, but it must be the usual 'USA! USA!' pro-American jingoist Michael Bay garbage as usual...
Wait, is that a Union Jack on that soldier's uniform? Like, Union Jack, as in NOT the Stars and Stripes? The Union Jack, as in BRITISH, otherwise non-American?
And following the battle at Shanghai, both the American and British NEST teams are paying respects for their dead and both are present and on equal ground.
I don't know about anybody else, but considering Bay's hard-on for the American military, to see at least a reference to another country like that shocked me.
All in all, certainly not as good as the first movie, but if you can stomach the length, plot, and juvenile humour, you'll enjoy it.
Luckily for those who dislike Michael Bay, word has it he won't be directing the third movie. I don't know what to make of this. The story better be good then.
...but it certainly doesn't mean it wasn't enjoyable as hell!
I mean, really, considering Michael Bay's usual and singular love of things going boom, did anybody actually walk into the movie theatre expecting a compelling narrative or any sort, or did they go just for the simple joy of watching huge robots beat the crap out of each other in a flurry of awesome CG and explosions of all sizes?
I did that, and I found it to be very enjoyable. Again, the story was weak, but at the end of the day, the thing that sets Transformers apart from, say, an Uwe Boll 'film' is the fact that the former is just a ridiculous and overwhelming shitton of fun to watch.
Story be damned - if there is a movie that has me staring at the screen in wide-eyed awe and has me going 'oh, that was fucking awesome!' and at the conclusion of the film has me wondering why my feet are all damp and sweaty and why I can barely walk in a straight line or look at cars the same way...
But the thing that surprised me the most about Transformers was that brief bit at the beginning with the NEST team. The camera focused and did a very prominent close-up of the flag on one of the soldier's uniforms.
Oh, but it must be the usual 'USA! USA!' pro-American jingoist Michael Bay garbage as usual...
Wait, is that a Union Jack on that soldier's uniform? Like, Union Jack, as in NOT the Stars and Stripes? The Union Jack, as in BRITISH, otherwise non-American?
And following the battle at Shanghai, both the American and British NEST teams are paying respects for their dead and both are present and on equal ground.
I don't know about anybody else, but considering Bay's hard-on for the American military, to see at least a reference to another country like that shocked me.
All in all, certainly not as good as the first movie, but if you can stomach the length, plot, and juvenile humour, you'll enjoy it.
Luckily for those who dislike Michael Bay, word has it he won't be directing the third movie. I don't know what to make of this. The story better be good then.
Sam and Mikaela were a big part of the movie. However, the movie did one thing right and that was make Optimus Prime a supreme badass. The first movie hinted at it with his supremely one-sided fight against Bonecrusher on the freeway but them made him useless against Megatron (Humans did more damage to Megs in the first movie than any Autobot did). In this movie, Optimus is like a blender set on high speed with optional guns. Sadly, besides one scene with Sideswipe, Optimus is pretty much the only stand-out Autobot. The twins Skids and Mudflap keep things lighthearted but are racial stereotypes and reduced to Jar-jar Binks style comedy. You'll get a chuckle but its not laugh out loud funny.
Good things about the movie? Tons of action. Humans can actually damage Decepticons now that there is actually a squadron of troops from at least 2 countries trained to deal with them. Optimus's message at the end of the first movie reached some new Autobots who bring more to the screen than the previous group did. Arcee/Chromia/unnamed third bike were pretty neat onscreen even though the toys are subpa. The problem lies in them having a single line of dialogue.
Bay made every Autobot but Optimus seem like an afterthought. They're present and you see them give and take damage but they have no purpose other than to fill an empty space. Bumblebee gets a moment of awesomeness against a Decepticon who is either Rampage or Skipjack depending on if you go by the name given in the movie or the name given in the credits. All of them dissappear completely after the baddies are defeated so you have no clue as to the casualties (if any) on the Autobot side.
The Decepticons have a huge presence in the film. There are dozens of Constructicons, though only 6 make up Devastator. Devastator is pretty much useless in every aspect. His appearance is awesome but afterwards he just... bleh. There is a lot of focus on Megatron who has a new alt form thanks to being fixed w/ parts from another decepticon and The Fallen who act like Sith Lords. Starscream ends up being the only Decepticon who's actually seems unique and true to his G1 character even if the voice is different. Soundwave is present but spends the entire movie raping a satellite and lacks his voice effect. Ravage plays Soundwave's roll by transporting mini-bots everywhere despite being rather small himself. There were two Decepticons left alive on earth after the first movie but only one makes an appearance in the new film.
Wheelie and Jetfire are decent, though I found Wheelie humping Meagan Fox's leg kind of gratuitous. Jetfire is funny as a cranky old man complete with cane but when he uses teleports it is unexplained and random. The Fallen's telekinesis is also unexplained and random.
Overall, I enjoyed the film. It had its flaws but followed Michael Bay's usual formula when it comes to making blockbusters. Juvenile Comedy + Explosions + light T&A + more explosions + slow motion action scenes = success. I find that the formula works. The plot is thin and so is robo-heaven but I'll be damned if I didn't think it was worth the Imax cost.
Also yes, the human boy is pretty much forced to tie to thin plot together so it does focus on him. Bumblebee, Optimus, Skids, and Mudflap are the only autobots with more than 3-4 lines. The Decepticons and Optimus make the movie.
Good things about the movie? Tons of action. Humans can actually damage Decepticons now that there is actually a squadron of troops from at least 2 countries trained to deal with them. Optimus's message at the end of the first movie reached some new Autobots who bring more to the screen than the previous group did. Arcee/Chromia/unnamed third bike were pretty neat onscreen even though the toys are subpa. The problem lies in them having a single line of dialogue.
Bay made every Autobot but Optimus seem like an afterthought. They're present and you see them give and take damage but they have no purpose other than to fill an empty space. Bumblebee gets a moment of awesomeness against a Decepticon who is either Rampage or Skipjack depending on if you go by the name given in the movie or the name given in the credits. All of them dissappear completely after the baddies are defeated so you have no clue as to the casualties (if any) on the Autobot side.
The Decepticons have a huge presence in the film. There are dozens of Constructicons, though only 6 make up Devastator. Devastator is pretty much useless in every aspect. His appearance is awesome but afterwards he just... bleh. There is a lot of focus on Megatron who has a new alt form thanks to being fixed w/ parts from another decepticon and The Fallen who act like Sith Lords. Starscream ends up being the only Decepticon who's actually seems unique and true to his G1 character even if the voice is different. Soundwave is present but spends the entire movie raping a satellite and lacks his voice effect. Ravage plays Soundwave's roll by transporting mini-bots everywhere despite being rather small himself. There were two Decepticons left alive on earth after the first movie but only one makes an appearance in the new film.
Wheelie and Jetfire are decent, though I found Wheelie humping Meagan Fox's leg kind of gratuitous. Jetfire is funny as a cranky old man complete with cane but when he uses teleports it is unexplained and random. The Fallen's telekinesis is also unexplained and random.
Overall, I enjoyed the film. It had its flaws but followed Michael Bay's usual formula when it comes to making blockbusters. Juvenile Comedy + Explosions + light T&A + more explosions + slow motion action scenes = success. I find that the formula works. The plot is thin and so is robo-heaven but I'll be damned if I didn't think it was worth the Imax cost.
Also yes, the human boy is pretty much forced to tie to thin plot together so it does focus on him. Bumblebee, Optimus, Skids, and Mudflap are the only autobots with more than 3-4 lines. The Decepticons and Optimus make the movie.
