Harry Potter Alternate Teachers for Hogwarts
- Thread starter bissek
- Start date
This may sound weird, but I vote for the Ed's from Ed, Edd, & Eddy, Ed for either CoMC (who know more mythology than him) or DADA (Once again, who has more theoretical monster fighting knowledge than him), Double D for Muggle Studies (Help the wizards see the light of modern science and assign homework on sticky notes) or Arithmancy (it's basically magical math class) and Eddy handling broom flight and Quidditch (Don't know where else to put him). Rolf could take the class big Ed doesn't (superstition helps him some) or more likely herbology, Jimmy takes potions (it's kinda like cooking, if only it wasn't in that dreary icky dungeon), Sarah could help him (When is one really without the other), Johnny 2X4 takes Divinnation (He's as batty as Trelawny, and sees the futre with his magic plank), Marie Kanker could be History (She did, at one point, show knowleadge on art history at least), and May Kanker working as the care taker.
No Ideas on Nazz, Kevin or Lee.
I have a serious reason for one, I really think in the show, big Ed is genuinely magical, how else could he regularly bend and/or break laws of man, nature and physics, while keeping a brain the size of a walnut.
No Ideas on Nazz, Kevin or Lee.
I have a serious reason for one, I really think in the show, big Ed is genuinely magical, how else could he regularly bend and/or break laws of man, nature and physics, while keeping a brain the size of a walnut.
Ryuubee Sonozaki as Headmaster, with the family assisting in other roles. Why?
Because, if there is one thing that's going to scare Voldermort other than Death, its Terror itself.
Alternatively, Lord Zedd as defence against the dark arts... mainly because he's using the position for more power, but also he is pissed off that a mere human is trying to claim the title of "ultimate evil on earth", and that the best sources of info on where he is are inside the Castle
Because, if there is one thing that's going to scare Voldermort other than Death, its Terror itself.
Alternatively, Lord Zedd as defence against the dark arts... mainly because he's using the position for more power, but also he is pissed off that a mere human is trying to claim the title of "ultimate evil on earth", and that the best sources of info on where he is are inside the Castle
I'm pretty sure they have to at the very least teach basic math, if nothing else for potion making. Unless you're going to tell me that calculating the exact amount of ingredients to use for a potion doesn't involve math? That soulds like a phenomenally good way to get your kids killed. Also, it's more or less stated that we don't see all the classes - or teachers, for that matter - that are actually in Hogwarts in the books. Sooooo...
Snape hasn't been in his position forever. Also, following the recipe is all nice and good, but if YOU CAN'T EVEN COUNT, you can't even do that, so there.
Hey, how much is three and a third leaves?! (takes five, makes poison instead of a healing potion) OH GOD WHY
And this, kids, is why you should learn fucking math before screwing with potion making. You will want to at least be able to count to 10, and unless you went to Muggle school before going to Hogwarts, there HAS TO BE a math teacher.
Hey, how much is three and a third leaves?! (takes five, makes poison instead of a healing potion) OH GOD WHY
And this, kids, is why you should learn fucking math before screwing with potion making. You will want to at least be able to count to 10, and unless you went to Muggle school before going to Hogwarts, there HAS TO BE a math teacher.
Theresa for either Divination (she's more than proven her skills as a seer in canon) or History of Magic (she's the younger sister of the player character from Fable; she is known to still be alive as of the events of Fable 3, 550 years later).
Sakuya Izayoi as caretaker. This one should be obvious.
Cirno for DADA. Scary thing is, she might actually survive the year with no injuries...
Sakuya Izayoi as caretaker. This one should be obvious.
Cirno for DADA. Scary thing is, she might actually survive the year with no injuries...